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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Trying but not trying...anyone else?

160 replies

larrythelizard · 12/12/2020 08:28

TTC no 2.

I decided (with full support from DH) that we should get on with TTC no 2...

I've said to myself that for we'll take a 'relaxed' approach to it for a few months (no temping, no SMEP etc) and see what happens, no great rush - took the best part of a year (incl a MC) to conceive DS so I don't expect it to be quick...

Except obviously it's now all I can think about as I approach what I think is my fertile week!!

Anyone else out there in the same boat and want to try and keep the madness on here and not in their heads?!

OP posts:
mooloop · 12/12/2020 09:45

Me! DH is very chilled about it all, I am trying (pretending) to be chilled too Grin due AF on Monday and hoping she doesn't arrive 🙈

magnarocks · 12/12/2020 11:08

Thinking of starting TTC no.2 soon so place marking.

Rightthen24 · 12/12/2020 12:26

Can I join, we are TTC no2, took 18 months to concieve no1 so expect it to take that long again but we caught in first month on trying but had a miscarriage so back to TTC.
I am not doing anything apart from DTD every 2-3 days and I'm actually really relaxed about it. The first time was awful and I was so stressed with opks and testing so I am refusing to go down that route again. If it's meant to be it will happen 😁 Good luck 😁

bravotango · 12/12/2020 12:44

Can I join! We have decided to TTC number 1 - taking the 'relaxed approach' too (although I'm already counting days so not sure how relaxed that is). I think I've just started my fertile week so a bit of a way to go yet in my first cycle but very, very excited!

Original poster
larrythelizard · 12/12/2020 14:08

Oh good, my kind of people...you know, the ones pretending they're not thinking about it all the time but they actually are!

My cycle has timed very well for Xmas in that AF is due early Jan so don't have to worry about a BFP before Xmas day and being rumbled by PIL!

As if it'll be that quick...!

I'm generally a bit of a control freak so TTC is quite hard for me in that respect!

Decided to make it fun so have got some nice new undies for later...!

OP posts:
magnarocks · 12/12/2020 14:34

For those who are TTC no.2, how old are your first borns?

Ours is very nearly 4, it's a longer age gap than I would have ever anticipated but life has just sort of got in the way.

Rightthen24 · 12/12/2020 14:41

Our first turned 4 in Sept and doesn't start school until next Sep. I am happy with a bigger age gap, ideally No1 will be at school and I can spend time with No2 during the day when No1 is at school. Also No1 can be mummy's little helper 😁

Curiosity101 · 12/12/2020 15:27

We're just starting trying for #2 this month. #1 is 15 1/2 months old but was almost 7 weeks early. It's possible we could have similar issues with #2 but fingers crossed for a smoother time this time.

We're being reasonably relaxed about it all. I expect to get a bit twitchy in the second week of my TWW though. Currently anticipating ovulation sometime next week.

bravotango · 12/12/2020 18:41

My cycle has timed very well for Xmas in that AF is due early Jan so don't have to worry about a BFP before Xmas day and being rumbled by PIL!

Mine too! What a relief. Think I'm due New Years Day - maybe a BFP to call in the NY?! Fingers crossed for us all.

Original poster
larrythelizard · 12/12/2020 19:38

No 1 is just about 18mo. Didn't think I'd want another quite as quickly but here we are...!

A BFP in Jan would be pretty cool but I have a sense it'll take longer!

OP posts:
JALIZ · 12/12/2020 23:39

Im TTC ... stopped with tbe pill a year ago and trying to take the chilled approach! Been actively trying for 4 months and now my chilled approach has turned rather less chilled!! Worse thing is each month I persuade myself I'm going to have a BFP!

MsCrapola · 12/12/2020 23:44

Hi, can I join?!

I am trying to convince myself I'm completely chill about ttc (number 1!) but the fact that I'm excited AF has arrived so I can start trying next cycle says otherwiseGrinthis is my first cycle after my coil was removed so a little all over the place I imagine.

Good luck to everyone!!

Original poster
larrythelizard · 13/12/2020 08:13

I feel you @JALIZ that was me TTC DC1. Hang in there!

DH was laughing at my attempt to be chill, he doesn't think I'll manage to keep it up!

OP posts:
Original poster
larrythelizard · 14/12/2020 09:18

Yeah obviously failed at being cool...ordered some ovulation strips 🤦🏻‍♀️

OP posts:
magnarocks · 14/12/2020 09:33

@larrythelizard, we've all been there... or frantically trying to play it cool and show no disappointment when OH says he's a bit tired when you're ovulating. 🙄 😆

Curiosity101 · 14/12/2020 09:38

@magnarocks Haha, that one did make me chuckle.

Nothing wrong with OPKs in theory @larrythelizard! Me and DH aren't timing anything specifically to fit with ovulation but I do have OPKs so that I know when I can do a HPT.

Original poster
larrythelizard · 14/12/2020 09:54

haha @magnarocks! OBVIOUSLY that would be fine as I'm sooo cool about this (ahem)

it's a slippery slope though @curiosity101...!

OP posts:
Jessicatayla · 14/12/2020 10:54

Taking the relaxed approach too. Except this month af is 5 days late and I'm getting bfns 😭 but because we are taking the relaxed approach I have no idea when I ovulated 😂

Original poster
larrythelizard · 14/12/2020 10:56

I'm really not sure the relaxed approach pays off @jessicatayla...i think you're proving it!

OP posts:
bigpricklyfern · 14/12/2020 11:01

Me too! TTC no 3. Have been trying but not trying for 9 months (not really trying TBF), but still disappointed every month when AF arrives. I’m a bit up and down with how chilled out I am about it, but as it’s no 3 we have decided that we are still very lucky with our two if it doesn’t happen.
Good luck to everyone!!

HopeAndDriftWood · 14/12/2020 11:08

I’m sort-of doing this, but for #1. We’re happy if it happens now, but not actively trying. I came off the pill in early November so I’ve been using ovulation sticks as an idea of what’s going on...

I’d love to say that I’m still feeling all chilled and “it’ll happen when it’s ready”, but I’m thinking about it a good 80% of the time 🙈

Curiosity101 · 14/12/2020 11:13

@Jessicatayla That is exactly why I've got OPKs! I'd go crazy if AF was later than usual due to late ovulation!

Jessicatayla · 14/12/2020 11:27

@larrythelizard @Curiosity101 honestly 😭😂 gave birth in 2018 to my first and since then had nice regularish periods 30-35days never missed one but now I'm on CD40, its a nightmare 😭😂

Original poster
larrythelizard · 14/12/2020 14:38

@Jessicatayla Sod's law!

OP posts:
wildraisins · 14/12/2020 16:31

It's so hard isn't it, not to think about it all the time!

Feels like we should just be chilled and getting on with our lives... it's no big deal after all... except of course, it is!

I spoke to my partner the other day about it all and how silly I felt about obsessing. He was like, look, if you need to obsess then that's what you need - don't beat yourself up about it. It's a strange time.

Made me feel a lot better tbh!

If you're "trying but not trying" then, well, sorry but you're basically trying! And so obviously you're going to be thinking about it... and that's OK :)

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