🐧 Penguin Huddle 🐧 Thread 36 - TTC after pregnancy loss

[Kiki275]

Welcome to the 🐧 huddle. This a safe place to give and receive support for everyone who has experienced the loss(es) of a pregnancy or baby. Pregnancy and child loss is one of the most difficult things we can experience and it can also be the most lonely time too. So many of us have found much comfort from other lovely ladies on this thread, together we're rooting for lots of BFP's! Let 2020 end on a positive note x

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Oh @kim80 I am so sorry, this is awful. I've been thinking about you ❤️ I have miscarried naturally twice at home, if you want to chat about it, let me know. Don't feel forced into anything. Sending you lots of love xxx

@kim80 I'm so sorry to hear this and even more so about the treatment you are receiving. Do whatever is best for you, don't allow them to bully you because of mistakes they made. Will you lodge a complaint when you feel able to?x

@kim80 im so sorry to hear this. Sending you hugs. I can only hope that the physical loss goes as smoothly as possible for you. I agree you should complain about your treatment. The more that complain could bring about a change in how they manage miscarriage. Again im so sorry for your loss, were here if you want to talk , rant or just need reassuring xx

@kim80 so sorry to hear your news. Thinking of you x

Thank you ladies. I have waited a week now and nothing has happened so I am booked in to discuss the mva so I'm hoping by the weekend it will be done. I couldn't face the tablets and after the two erpcs this seems like the best option for me.

I really appreciate all your kind words.

I have lodged a complaint against the sonographer but I am unsure they will listen but it has made me feel better.

Hope you are all well.xxx

@kim80 it's absolutely awful that this ordeal is being dragged out for you. Have you contacted PALS regarding the complaint?x

I am so sorry @kim80 ❤️ I hope they can get you in quickly. None of the options are ones we'd want to choose. I'm glad you feel able to raise a complaint and that it helped you feel a bit better - I wanted to with my epu in my recent loss but struggled to. Hopefully they will take on board your comments. Sending you lots of love.

Hope everyone else is doing OK xx

Hi @kiki275 yes I contacted pals. I have had two miscarriages now in 6 months and both times the epu has failed me. My first one the erpc wasn't complete at even though he told me he got everything out when I went for a scan two weeks later with heavy bleeding they informed me that I was actually still carrying a majority of it and had to have it done again.

So this time with the sonographer not willing to listen to anything I said and making me feel like I was actually going mental I was not willing to leave it. I know they will come back with well at the time it was viable viable but 2 weeks behind in growth lol I have to laugh if not I think I would loose my cool.

I am aware nothing could have prevented this and I am at ease that it was nothing I did wrong.

I just feel in such hard times twice I have now had negative dealings with epu and know how it's made me feel. I'm a strong minded person so I would hate to think how it would make someone who is anxious feel. 😟 it's not OK.

Thanks @VenusStarr, yes I was back to work today as work for a school so that was nice to actually have normality. Hope your well. X

@kim80 I do hope they take your complaints seriously, if only to prevent other mums going through the same thing. Do you have another accessible hospital, perhaps in another trust you could use instead for future pregnancy, or would you need to rely on and put your faith in the same place?x

@kim80 im sorry you had to deal with this woman on top of the horrible feelings that come with loss. You would think they would have more compassion, but I too found with all 9 of my losses that its just matter of fact with them. I too made complaints but nothing ever came of them.
Hope your procedure goes as well as it can do, virtual hand hold coming your way x

Hi @kiki275 we have no other hospital around here so that would have to be ipswich. I have just got back from having the manual vacuum aspiration done awake and I have to say the doctor and nurse were amazing with me especially as my partner was not allowed in either. It's the best treatment I have had there. He even sneaked me in for an unofficial scan after to put my mind at rest that he had got everything after my last procedure being a fail.

I am not going to be trying anymore I can not put myself through the heartache any more. The consultant offered to do tests but I just can't bring myself to go through it.

The Nurse did say to me today that she really feels for women at the moment going through all this I covid as the treatment and rules is so strict and not allowing women partners there for support is hard.

@mumlili9 we can only hope that the complaints we put in make a slight difference on the next women who goes through what we have.

I appreciate all you lovely ladies support and wish you all the best and that you all gain your rainbow babies that you all deserve.

I never realised how much support you can get from people that you have never met.

I will remain on here to see all your success stories as I know there are more to come.

Thank you 😊

I'm glad you were treated with care and compassion today @kim80 ❤️ it sounds like a physically and emotionally draining day, I hope you are able to rest at home now. It's a difficult decision to stop and not one you've taken lightly, I'm glad you'll still be here. Sending you lots of love xxx

I'm nearing the end of my first cycle with predisolone added and I've got a horrendous uti, so on antibiotics as well now. Not feeling hopeful for this month, so we're moving onto medicated cycles next month. Hope everyone is well xx

Hello ladies how are you all.

@kim80 how are you hun x
@venusstarr how the treatment working

Hi @Mumlili9 the treatment hasn't worked so far sadly. I'm on my 5th cycle and doing ovulation induction with letrozole this time. I've go a scan next week and hopefully will trigger ovulation. He did put me on baby aspirin while ttc but I've decided to stop that as I'm wondering if it's affecting implantation.
We've also got our nhs ivf consultation in early April, so will be starting that next if no luck this month.
How are you? How's your husband getting on with his recovery?

Sending you love @kim80 ❤️

Hope everyone is OK xx

Apologies for the delayed response.

@kim80 that's such a brave decision to make. I can't even imagine how much heartache you're going through just now. Massive hugs from me.xx

@VenusStarr it sucks the meds haven't worked this time but keeping everything crossed for further cycles. What does the consultant say about the baby aspirin? Is it just a "won't hurt to try"?

Last week marked the twins first birthday/anniversary. It wasn't a good week, although I was determined to make their birthday a happy one. I'm so stressed with refurbishment stuff and bloody builders, I've actually been having frequent palpitations.

Hope everyone is otherwise okay. Spring has arrived and a new beginning/change is just around the corner x

I'm sorry the twins' anniversary was tough @Kiki275 💙💙 and that you've been stressed. I hope you find some balance.

With the aspirin, it's part of his standard protocol, like you say it's a no harm in trying but as I don't have any blood clotting issues, I don't 'need' it, so I'm trying without. I think if I get a bfp, I'll take it again.
I've been on letrozole this month - it's like clomid, so even though I ovulate on my own, he wants to boost my chances by growing more follicles. But I had a random bleed yesterday, only cd 7, so I'm not hopeful for this approach. Definitely fresh blood and not my period as I finished that on day 3. I have a scan with him tomorrow to check my ovaries, but definitely think we're going to be doing ivf soon. I feel very flat about our chances to be honest.

In other news, one of my orchid buds is almost ready to pop. So I've not totally lost hope, but feeling a bit lost with how we're going to get our rainbow 🌈

Lots of love to all xxx

@Mumlili9 This thread just popped up in my active threads. I hope you are coping okay. You are so strong and have been such a support to so many of us. I just read about your husband and your updates. I wish him a speedy recovery

@VenusStarr I hope you are okay too. I saw you might be taking a break from the thread so wasn't sure whther to message on here but it's not that long since I couldn't handle being on the thread and being triggered by others HPT and scan photos. Take a break if you need to. Good luck with TTC either way. If you ever want to PM me then please do

@InDreamland I hope you are doing okay too. I saw you posted.

I have NC so hopefully you have connected the dots. I lost my DD at full term two years ago and this thread was a huge support to me

Sorry I haven't replied to everyone but hope you are all doing well 💗

@VenusStarr I'm sorry you're feeling so low about your chances. I've every faith that you've a great team behind you and I'll keep everything crossed you get your rainbow news soon xx

Thank you @ElderMillennial good to hear from you ❤️

Thank you @Kiki275, I had some bad news today. I haven't responded to treatment as expected, which is disappointing. But the worst news was I have suspected adenomyosis, which is something to do with my uterus lining and blood supply. I don't know too much about it but I've got a follow up scan later this week, but it's not good news. It possibly us another explanation for our recurrent losses, but it likely means our chances are reduced. Feeling pretty devastated xx

Oh @VenusStarr that sucks! I suppose knowing is better than carrying on in ignorance but it's awful to hear. Will they be able to treat it?x

I'm not sure @Kiki275 the only stuff I've seen about treatment is a full hysterectomy 😢 I'm hoping that because I don't have severe symptoms (but it turns out I do actually have a lot of the symptoms, without realising) that it's manageable.

I says to my husband yesterday, I have had well over 20 transvaginal scans in the last 3.5 years and they've only just picked it up now?! Im glad we found out now, before our ivf consultation because hopefully they'll be able to take it into account. Xx

@VenusStarr there seems to be so little information on it. Hoping the IVF consultant can help further and keeping everything crossed for you x

Hello @VenusStarr @Kiki275 @ElderMillennial

Sorry to hear there's no good news yet but fingers crossed.

I had some tests repeated recently as im really confused that if the doctor thinks I'm menopausal then why are my periods like clock work. So I had my progesterone tested at 6dpo ( 7dpo was a Saturday and my GP is closed then) and it came back 54 nmol ( 30 nmol or more is positive for ovulation). I had some private tests done which said my amh was good, fsh was good, thyroid was fine but my estrogen was low. So im thinking im not menopausal so I've rung the consultants secretary and asked for an urgent telephone call with the Dr but so far I've not heard back. I did receive this letter from my gp though

@Mumlili9 honestly not a clue but it does sound like something is off kilter. My SIL was also diagnosed as menopausal but isn't, so think it's often just a go to explanation. Fingers crossed it's something that can be treated xx