TTC 35+ Thread 4 Cougar and Silver Fox Club

[Sleeeeeepy]

Yes it's Thread FOUR! Baby dust all round!

@selina37 I was taking them but they made me really constipated so have stopped 😂

Hi everyone is anyone getting nausea from folic acid ?dont wanna stop taking it because of my age wanna try and take it till who knows not sure if it’s folic acid or the side effect off coming off the since my last dodgey period well what I thaught was a period gonna test Wednesday morning just put my mind at rest so I can wait for my period in peace this symptom spotting going on in the back of head ain’t good at the moment

@trying4mylastmiracle I’m having terrible nausea in the run up to my period. Not sure if it’s the TTC vitamins tbh, wondering if it’s just hormonal. Periods have changed a fair bit since having my DS. Seem to remember having bad nausea in my teens too before periods, to the point of being sick...doesn’t answer your question but I can sympathise!

@Highlandmama thank you for your response my period is not due till the 22nd I’ve skip one today zero folic acid I can’t god backache , I’m not cramping just got this dull feeling , nausea it’s driving me Crazy I feel right off so whether it’s still the side effects of coming off the pill or folic acid it’s making me feel right off and miserable at the minute

@Trying4mylastmiracle yes suspect it might be coming off the pill to be honest. Doubt it’s folic acid but you could try taking at a different time of day and see if that helps? Maybe after dinner? AF also due on the 22nd for me! This is the pleasant nausea and anxiety free portion of the month for me! Hope you feel better soon and aren’t too queasy for the BD!

@Highlandmama lol 😂 it’s as if you know he said to me on Thursday so this weekend are we busy I can home if you want me be his currently working away and I said no it’s okay you stay at work sooner you finish sooner you will be home I have no desire neither energy to do it I feel sick 🤢 il try and see if I feel better if I take them at bed time instead

AF is here, I've felt it coming the last few days so no surprises, managed to extend my cycle to 25 days which I'm pretty chuffed about. I hope you're all having a good week x

Hi everyone, how are we all doing?

We have decided not to use OPKs this month and just see what happens.

Fingers crossed!

No chance to test this month. Af came early 😭. I wasn’t holding out much hope for this month so onwards and upwards. Cd2 here!

@Sleeeeeepy sorry to hear af arrived for you too!

Ahh bad luck @LT103 I think we might have been cycle buddies a while back, seems we're back in sync! Fingers crossed for some baby dust!

I'm definitely out too. CD1 today. Even after 4 negative tests I was still holding out hope! 😔🤦‍♀️ I know the chances of eventually getting pregnant don't reduce each month that we ttc without success, but it does feel that way.
Think my OHs disappointment is getting to me too.

Sorry @Sleeeeeepy @LT103 and @Keepeas It feels so disappointing. But yes - onwards and upwards. hopefully this is the month for you all! You are all in sync!

It does feel that way doesn't it @Keepeas Let's hope this is our month, why not 😊 If I don't catch by xmas I'm stopping, I chuffing hate periods and will then be mini pill popping til menopause 🥳

Hello all!
My partner and I have decided to start TTC. I am 37 and can't help feeling like it's going to be a slog. I have an 11 yo from a previous relationship. I am also being treated for severe depression but the last few months have been nice and stable, I'm going to have to change from my current antidepressant ,paroxetine, and on to sertraline. So not actually TTC until my meds have switched and we've had a meeting with my psychiatrist.
Anyway, just here for reassurance and support :-) xx

Hello everyone! Sorry I've been quiet lately - I took a step back to have a think about everything. I had a session with a fertility counsellor yesterday, which was super-helpful, but churned up all my feelings!

Do you mind me asking how many of you currently have a single-child family? And how you feel about it, if a second one doesn't happen?

While we're still trying (and will continue for now), we're probably about 80% ready to accept our family of three. In some ways it's quite exciting, looking forward to the future, and especially all the things we can do with our daughter in the next few years.

Of course, there's still the 20% of 'what if'... which is what I find really tough. The option of IVF is there, but the statistical chance of it working (with low egg supply) is less than 10%. It COULD still happen naturally, but equally unlikely within the next 12 months (and we don't want to drag it out longer than that).

I think my feelings are confused by social pressures and the assumption that we 'should' give our daughter a sibling. But it's probably not possible, so it may be better to accept that and focus on her, rather than sink our attention into a year of IVF. But there's that 'what if'...

Hi @NaughtyNiffler 👋 I’m 37 and trying for number two as well. Here’s hoping it’s not a long slog.
@CC81 I have one DS and have mixed feelings about staying a single child family. I wouldn’t be on here if I were 100% content with it!! Main worry is that he would be on his own if anything happened to us. But we have a lovely supportive family and I hope he can spend plenty of time with his cousins who are around the same age. We were told it could take “many years” for us to conceive naturally and although it’s happened twice in 5 years, I think there’s a real possibility we might not have more. I love my wee rainbow miracle and am so thankful just for him. But keeping hopeful/prayerful for another 😊

I'm not that comfortable with my son being an only child. Both me and my husband are only children and because of our upbringing we definitely don't want this for our child. If we can't conceive number 2 naturally, we will probably look to other assistance.

@Highlandmama fingers crossed for a smooth process!
@CC81 I have an 11 yo ds from a previous relationship that was abusive. I seem actually pretty desperate to experience a pregnancy within a loving relationship. I will be pretty gutted if it doesn't work out for us

@Highlandmama - Thanks for replying :) Yeah, same here... we absolutely would like a second child... if it was straightforward. I'm now remembering what our feelings were before we started trying (at the start of this year) - and it was very much "if it works out, then great". But as soon as we were threatened with the lack of choice, my feelings became more complex! I worry about the alone thing too. But I'd still worry about that if we had two kids! Or three! I hope by the time our daughter is an adult, she'll have support in the form of good friends and perhaps a loving partner too.

@CurlyNo2 - That's totally understandable (sorry to hear you were unhappy growing up). I had a sibling and so did my husband, which is partly why I'd like our daughter to have a similar experience... but there was only a 2-year difference with my brother, so it wouldn't be quite the same for our daughter anyway. Also, as the 'last resort' of IVF only has a 10% chance of success, it's most likely we'll have no choice in the matter... so we have to make peace with it and look at the positives.

@Qwom - That's understandable, too. I think it's a bit different for me, as we had our daughter together three years ago. I really hope it works out for you.

Your absolutely right @CC81 😘

As we haven't used OPKs this month I've no idea what's going on (to be fair I didn't even with OPKs 😂) but according to my Ovia app, tonight's the night! And I cannot be bothered...

@CurlyNo2 Some days just feel like that don't they, you know you 'should' try but you just want to watch tv and eat crisps 😂

I'm feeling quite emotional tonight - sorry long post venting.

For a few months now, we have managed to dtd a couple of days before ovulation only. Almost guaranteed each month on the day on ovulation, my husband has been unable to ejaculate (this happened again tonight). Then because of this we dont dtd for at least a week or not until next cycle as he is so nervous about it happening again. Every month is the same - we are looking at having sex 2-3 times in each cycle befor the window of opportunity so I don't even know if it will even have an impact. Now he doesn't know the day I ovulate but each month on the exact same day he just can't finish the job. I wholeheartedly sympathise with him because I know how badly this affects him but I suppose I'm feeling so frustrated. I never tell him when the time is right because I don't want to put extra stress on him. I actually cried after he lost his mojo tonight. Maybe I'm doing it wrong, maybe I do need to tell him. I don't know.

For a couple of years I have longed for another baby and I've always been very vocal about this but my husband has always said no. At the beginning of lockdown he saw how lonely our son was and agreed that he would now like to have another baby. I know it is a joint decision but I feel like I've wasted so much time waiting and I'm not getting any younger. Every month when AF arrives, im heartbroken, I make out that I'm not bothered but I am, I really am.

I don't really know what I'm trying to achieve with his post, think I just wanted to vent as I'm so frustrated and sad that I feel like my chance of a 2nd baby may not come after all. This is cycle no. 7. I caught quite quick with my son in cycle 3 so maybe I'm trying to compare which is making me worry.

@CurlyNo2 So glad you are able to share and vent. It’s really really important. On here, and if you have a trusted friend you could confide in too, that might be a positive thing. I’m so scared I’ll say the wrong thing because I know, oh wow do I know how stressful and difficult TTC can be! After our first mis it took over 2 years to conceive our son. And some months we would only manage the BD once or twice. The whole thing was so fraught with emotion. I only realised in hindsight how low I was feeling. I didn’t want to burden anyone with it all. I was wrong about that. Since then, other people have shared their hurt and pain at infertility and miscarriage with me and it’s such a privilege to be there for them! I wish I had been able to do that at the time, rather than bottle up my feelings. It’s good to share. The good things and the bad things. I’m sorry you are feeling frustrated and sad ❤️

So I haven't posted on here for a while so not sure if any of the same people are on here but anyway I have 2 children conceived through many, many rounds of ivf and blood, sweat and tears. My husband had an op a few months back for a blocked urethra which he has been waiting ages for. I ov'd on day 14 this month and we dtd once on day 13 and I nearly didn't bother as he doesn't have a particularly high sex drive so I always kind of feel like I'm pestering. Anyway I'm 11dpo today and got this! Really can't believe it. I'm 41 though so I know it's likely this may not have a happy ending but for me the fact I've conceived naturally really is a miracle!

@lucieloos amazing!! Happy days! 🎊🙂