TTC 35+ Thread 4 Cougar and Silver Fox Club

[Sleeeeeepy]

Yes it's Thread FOUR! Baby dust all round!

Thanks @selina37 and @Sleeeeeepy - I do actually feel much more 'at peace' with the situation now. I'm hoping the reduced stress will have a positive impact.

For my natural chances, I'll definitely request the tubes thing from the NHS, plus a scan, seeing as they're on offer - nothing to lose (although there will probably be a waiting list).

On another note... does anyone else get a bit wobbly and nauseous around ovulation time?

I had a positive OPK yesterday (CD 14) and feel yukky today. This has happened numerous times before, but it always surprises me how crap I feel!

Coronavirus paranoia doesn't help

@Sleeeeeepy thanks for the info about your supplements- I’ve just started taking vitex which is supposed to help up your progesterone. Takes gross, wish I got it in pill form!! How long have you been trying?

@CurlyNo2 maybe that’s a good sign that you aren’t doing your usual spotting?

@claireb707

The doctor I spoke to 2 weeks ago said that as soon as she gets the results of his bloods early - mid next week she will check everything then send off the referral to the sub fertility clinic. After that I'm.not sure what happens and no idea what the wait is either.

(Slight name change for me)

Doc still hasn't sent off our referral. Partners bloods were back Wednesday, I rang to check she had sent it Thursday but they couldn't find the forms that partner dropped into reception when he went for his bloods. They said they'd look for them and I should ring again Friday.
I rang Friday and they still hadn't found them. Theyd look again and ring me back.
They rang back later and said they'd found them and they were with the doc who was referring us but she was off sick yesterday so who knows when it will be sent off 😩

I'm cd41 today, 23 dpo and I think the cursed cycle 13 is finally over. I had very pale pink spotting yesterday and I've really bad period pains today, no sign of actual period though. And my temps plummeted this morning.

Onto cycle 14 then I guess

Hi hope everyone is doing ok!! Just caught up on all the posts

Just back from a few days away relaxing on one of the islands. Amazing sunshine, lovely walks and a few wines has def got me much more relaxed. Cd15 tho and no sign ovulation yet so I think this will be another slightly later month.

Period in full flow today 😩

I'm sorry @claireb7rg that sucks.

Your trip sounds amazing @LT103 I hope you feel lovely and refreshed.

I'm wondering if this is meant to be for us. In a philosophical rather than unhappy way. What I'm not so happy about is having to self isolate because DC2 has a light cough. It's going to be a looooong week.

@Sleeeeeepy - I've felt a bit the same, in terms of potentially accepting what we have.

It's been a really tough few months, facing the fact that it may not be possible to give our child a sibling.

I'd always thought of IVF as being the 'last resort' - so really panicked after discovering I may have a low egg supply (because that's not good for IVF). I've dreaded going through an awful, expensive process with a low chance of success.

But in recent days, something has clicked. Rather than desperately hoping, if a doctor tells us that it's very unlikely to work, I may actually feel strangely 'off the hook'. I may choose NOT go ahead with the expense and stress of IVF at all.

So that means accepting that if it doesn't happen naturally, we'll be a single-child family and make the best of it. No final decision yet, but I actually feel ok about it. Much calmer than before!

(Sorry for my long rambles - my thoughts have been utterly dominated by this stuff in recent times!)

@CC81 It's a really tough one to reconcile in your head, but sometimes the cost (emotionally as much as financially) is too high. We'll keep going a few more months then stop.

How is everyone? It's pretty quiet at the moment, I hope you're all OK x

We just found out a family member is expecting. Super excited for her but brings al those “when will it be us” thoughts to the surface 😢
Still nothing on opk here. I had hoped I’d ovulate as normal while I had my holiday from work and was all relaxed but nope it’s going to be late again this month so just need to see what happens

Hope everyone is doing ok x

6 days till AF and nothing here, don't want to tempt fate but I'd normally be spotting about now. I ovulate early so I'm about 12 DPO.

I'm almost due AF here. Haven't tried this month due to having hycosy and it's been a nice month to not have to constantly watch myself and second guess my body.

Pretty sure now that I ovulate around day 10/11 so definitely going to try DTD in days 9 and 10 for sure next month.

Really, really must try and stop counting the days though!! Just know the ovulation time, DTD then and STOP the thinking.

@CurlyNo2 what day do you think you ovulate and how long is your cycle?

I'm a 28 day cycle and I ovulate CD11.

Its really hard trying not to count the days to every checkpoint isn't it?

When I conceived my son, I was totally oblivious and just by chance took a PG test 2 days before my period just to see what would happen - got the shock of my life! We had been trying and got caught really quickly, how times have changed!!

@Sleeeeeepy feeling sympathy over the self isolating for a cold! It took 5 days to finally get my LO tested after his nursery sent him home for a cold 🤦 such a struggle to get any work done!

@CC81 we're also coming to the point where we need to decide whether to accept our 1 child family. Had a disappointing conversation with the Doctor last week, they said they can't do anything for us on the NHS. No testing beyond the blood tests they've already done 😞 now we're considering whether we can afford to try ivf. It's just so expensive with such a low chance of success, but we'd find a way to pay if only we knew it would definitely work!

@LT103 ditto on pregnant family member announcement...we're not close so honestly I just felt a bit jealous and resentful of how young they are 😱 not something I can admit anywhere else!

👋🏻 hi ladies congratulations to all the BFP's lovely news. I hope everyone else is keeping well. I'm after some advice if possible, what ovulation kits would you recommend? I haven't used anything up until now. AF due Thursday so I'm not out yet but feeling very pre menstrual - lower abdo pain, niggling headache etc so I'm expecting it right on time. Hoping to give myself a better chance next cycle!

@Sleeeeeepy and @CC81 sorry you feeling that way, it’s so tough mentally all this knowing if it’s going to happen or not.

@selina37 I think I ovulate day 11 or 12 too! I’m due my period today - nothing yet but I started taking Vitex this month so not sure if it’s going to mess up my cycle. I’ve come out in loads of spots around my jaw so it must be doing something for my hormones! Anyone else taking it?

I spoke to soon, just had some light pink staining on the toilet paper 😔

Sorry @CurlyNo2

Thank you hun x

I'm sorry @CurlyNo2 that sucks ☹️ It's not over til the witch arrives though.

I think the pills I'm taking are working to lengthen my cycle a bit, just had peakish (best I get) LH and it's cd12, last month was CD7. So at least we have a shot and if it's not to be so be it x

@Sleeeeeepy that’s amazing it has lengthened it by 5 days! Really positive as more time for the eggs to mature. That’s what I’m hoping Vitex will do for me

@Internetaddictgirl I was a bit surprised tbh, lets hope it's a good egg!

Hey all, just catching up!

@Sleeeeeepy - Good work on the cycle lengthening - that sounds really positive. Fingers crossed.

@selina37 - I know exactly what you mean about counting/monitoring everything. It does NOT help with stress levels at all!

@Internetaddictgirl - Thank you. Yeah, I've found the uncertainty the toughest thing to deal with.

@CurlyNo2 - Really sorry to hear that. I had a few months with pre-AF spotting earlier in the year, which I kept thinking was implantation bleeding (but of course it wasn't). It's really hard watching for symptoms etc.

More about my situation in the next post...

Here's my update:

We FINALLY had our consultation with the private clinic this morning.

Basically, everything is physically fine EXCEPT my egg supply (my AMH is low, as expected; which correlates with the high FSH and low AFC - and means my ovarian reserve is probably diminished).

And unfortunately, that's the ONE thing they can't fix; and also the thing which makes IVF unlikely to work.

Natural conception is still possible, but could take ages - and we don't want this to dominate our lives forever. For the same reason, we're keeping it strictly between ourselves and not discussing it with friends or family.

So... I'm feeling a bit sad, but it helps to know where we stand and I'm working on accepting it.

At present, we think we MIGHT try a round of standard IVF at the start of next year, as a trial to see how my body reacts. Then decide to do either more standard IVF or natural modified. The bottom line is that no one knows for sure how someone will respond to IVF until they try it, as the test results merely give a statistical indication.

In the meantime, we want to carry on trying naturally for the rest of this year (as it's not impossible - and we've only been trying for 9 months) and do a lot of thinking about how MUCH we want this, versus the costs and expense. Especially as we already have a child, who should get our full attention.

@Keepeas - Sounds like you're on a similar page to me. What have your NHS test results been like? Any concerns?