Over 40 TTC - lots of baby dust for us...3!

[SparrowSG]

New thread for us 40+'s

@EC22 sorry to hear this. When I had a cp at 5 weeks I passed huge clots, and small pieces of tissue but not 5x7" that sounds very big for 5 weeks. Glad you took a pic to show mw. Are you definitely sure it's not a clot?

@MaryShelley1818
So sorry to hear you are feeling down. Getting AF is so tough. Yet even if it isn't your month this month, it will be again soon. Your lb will have a sibling. You just have to keep trying. Have you had more than 1 loss?

@EC22 am scrolling back and can't find how far along you were... the size seems quite huge so perhaps you were further along yes. Glad you took picks... when I had a miscarriage at 6 weeks and did pass my little bean.. but was probably only a few cms in size with all the other bits around it..
rest up if you can... and sending lots of love and hugs...
Will reply to other ladies in a bit a few errands to run and dodge the rain. Love to all xxxx

Thank you KCM99.
I’ve been pregnant 4 times.
I had a late miscarriage a good 20yrs ago. Then when ttc out little boy I had a miscarriage in the December and conceived him in the March. Then CP last month.
I guess like everyone on here there’s just that awful feeling of running out of time.

I can post a pic? It’s gross though?

Hi all, I still lurk now and then - thinking of TTC again - does that make me crazy or selfish? It may just be unresolved psychological issues to do with the traumatic delivery maybe - I have an appointment with the perinatal psychologist this morning so that might shed some light!

@EC22 - it sounds like you've shed a decidual cast- this is rarely associated with early losses and happened to someone I IVF cycled with - it's very traumatic but nothing harmful, it's the pregbant womb lining being shed all at once by a accident instead of gradually.

Yes it definitely all came out at once. I was sitting down and had to move to accommodate it. It was quite shocking.

@EC22 sorry you're going through this it must have been awful. Google decidual cast if you feel up to it, it might set your mind at rest.

@Russkispy I caught up with the thread and was so happy to read your news - what amazing timing! I'm wondering if I have a chance at a natural pregnancy now my body has had a successful one through IVF? DH isn't keen at the moment though are what happened so will have to wait and see!

I’ve googled, mine doesn’t look firm like the photos, it was soft, like membrane. I’ll show midwife, she should be able to shed some light.

I didn’t get my BFP til cycle day 50, I had a bfn on CD30 but then didn’t test again so it’s possible I was further along but I didn’t get anything more than a 2-3 on a CBD.

Very confusing.

MaryShelley you can get help with recurrent miscarriages no matter what age you are. I was reluctant to go to my GP as thought she'd laugh at me but consequently found out via EPU that LOADS of women are trying in their 40's and we are to be seen after 2 mc. So don't wait. That goes for anyone else. I have my first appointment with the RMC next month. They'll do a battery of hormone tests, go over all my cycle information, detail the results from my D&C. I'll probably get a hysteroscopy (camera inside womb to see what's going on) oh yes plus progesterone pessaries!

You can ring your local EPU and explain your recent losses and they'll refer you to the RMC. Or when you fall pg again, go see the EPU even if you think it's going to be a chemical. You'll be on their radar then and you'll get into the clinic if it's not your first loss.

I didn't know any of this abs thought I'd have to suffer in silence but not so. Just because we are in our 40's doesn't mean we aren't entitled to access these services.

Ring your local hospital and ask to be put through to the EPU (early pregnancy unit).

Good luck everyone!!

EC22 sorry you are going througg this, it's so hard. I passed a similar size thing after my mmc last year. I mc at 10 weeks but baby only made it to 6.5 weeks. I went through the mc process but stuff was left over so I was sent for medicated mc in hospital, but just before, as I was walking along, I felt sonething huge slide down (tmi), felt like I was laying an egg. When I checked it, it was a huge mass of grey tissue, I could even see the cord. I would be interested to see your pic as it may be the same? Could put you closer to 6 or 7 weeks.

Critter - how are you getting on? Glad you are still around, and if you want to ttc again why not! To be honest, if you want more, you can't really wait around. No harm in trying

Is there a way to PM a photo? I don’t want to post in main thread as don’t want to upset anyone.

@Cleozeta - I'm doing ok thank you - completely exhausted as sleep is very hard to come by! The twins are doing great - they are absolutely gorgeous and get masses of attention wherever we go! They were 9 weeks old yesterday.

@EC22 I don't think you can PM a photo. Most people on this thread are used to photos of CM etc. So I don't you'll upset anyone though!

@CritterTamer you're not being silly or selfish! I'm now nearly half way with my second and will be 44.5 when DC2 arrives, and still hoping all will go fine and immensely grateful to be preg at my age.....but I grew up in a big family and would love a third. The thought goes through my head A LOT even though it would mean TTC at 45 which I feel is pushing it on my luck and would put me in line for more MC probably. I think there's no harm in you trying. It's true some women who have IVF (or adopt due to fertility issues) conceive naturally afterwards. What does your DH say? Mine says he'd have 10 if he could afford it and he gets really excited by the wonder of the newborn stage the way I do too. But I can see him saying no on practical grounds.

@Ec22 I had a MC in may and I had a very similar experience although I was 10 weeks and passed 32 of those clots/pieces of tissue. They were massive and I was terrified. But I do have to say the gyne I saw reassured me half way through and said that obviously it was a threatening MC I may not have lost the baby. I hold out hope for you and wish you all the best. Sending hugs your way xxx

i have posted the image in the miscarriage forum with s warning.
Thanks

EC22 - seen it. Mine was similar but more ball-like and lumped together. I think it had been hanging around a while. I'd guess you were 6 or 7 weeks.
I also had a mc (cp) at 5 weeks and that was just a heavy period. No bodily drama.

@Michellebops don't want to falseky get your hopes up but sore boobs always been a sign of pregnancy for me.

@CritterTamer thank you! I wasn't even expecting a BFP. Was absolutely gobsmacked when did the test and even stronger line the following day. As you know I had second IVF in March which was successful but ended in a missed miscarriage and had a D&C the following day. 1st period arrived after 6 weeks. And a surprising BFP following cycle. I didn't track OV. And we DTD-ed every other day from CD9 to cd21 inclusively. And only first thing in the morning. Never night times. And maybe that made difference plus changing the diet and taking different supplements. I'll never know. I'm just hoping it really is this time around. Glad all is gong well with twins!
@EC22 so sorry you're going through this big hugs

@PetraRabbit I know what you mean about the DH being reluctant on practical/financial grounds - I'm already pushing a huge double buggy around -, where would I put a third baby?! We do have 2 good quality embryos on ice, but I know he won't be keen to spend another £2k on thawing and transferring them. I need to really figure out whether I really want a third or whether I'm just wanting to be pregnant again because of the sudden and traumatic way the last pregnancy ended at 34 weeks - I'm breast feeding at the moment so I guess we wouldn't even be able to try for a few more months anyway.

Good luck with the second half of your pregnancy xxx

@Russkispy congratulations and hope this is a sticky bean! I had a D&C 2 weeks ago. Did you ttc in the first cycle after your D&C and before BFP in cycle 2? I've heard you should wait then I also heard there's no need to wait...

@KCM99 I had an erpc 3 weeks ago and was advised to wait to get a period before ttc so the womb lining has a chance to build up after being scraped away by the procedure. However I just turned 42 so have no time to waste so have tried again already. I don’t know if I’ve actually ovulated though as had 10 days positive opks, so looks like my body was trying to ovulate but I don’t know if I actually did. I’d say just listen to your instinct and if it’s telling you to try again straightaway then just go for it :) Good luck x

@EC22 which miscarriage forum ? Not being goulash x

Hello everyone, could I join in please?
I've been lurking and reading the thread for a long time and only just now I have decided to really join.
I am 40. Have an 8 year old DD, conceived without any issues, straight forward pregnancy.
Had a MMC at 9 weeks in August last year.
CP in February this year.
Nothing ever since. We're on our 6th cycle.
I will be seeing a natural fertility specialist next month.
If nothing happens by September, I have decided to refer myself to a fertility clinic.