TTC after pregnancy loss - Thread 29 - huddle up and bring on the BFP's!

[Laney79]

Hey ladies, we were nearing the limit on thread 28 so here's a new one.

Roll Call...

Name: Laney79
Age: 39
TTC: #1 since autumn 2017.
2 losses - MMC discovered March 2018, MMC discovered Sept 2018 both at what should've been 9 weeks, bean and bow measured 6 weeks.

@Lilimum6 @Russkispy @Catconfusion @Boboelephant @fnej01 please tag and pass on!

Hi. I hope it's ok to post here. I'm nearly 44 and had a MMC this time last year aged 42, with an ERPC on the day that was supposed to be my 12 week scan. All so crap. And I didn't get pregnant in those supposedly fertile months afterwards either. But here I am with a BFP, around 5 weeks now. I had atrocious fertility results from recent scans and blood tests too, so bad I felt my chances were close to zero of ever getting pregnant again. I'm not here to join the group really but I think I posted once last year so wanted to come back and share a positive story. I'm about as old as it gets fertility- speaking so hopefully it'll give a bit of hope to the older group members!

And to add, I'm far from complacent - MC really kills the joy of pregnancy- but trying to be hopeful this time!

Please may I join?

Name: MamaGeordie
Age: 31
TTC: #3 since July '18
1 miscarriage March '19
Short cycles 23 days with short LPs.
Currently CD15 and had a positive OPK yesterday.
A big help to everyone

@PetraRabbit that's amazing! Congratulations to you and your baba

@strawberrye oh hun I totally get the anniversary thing. Our anniversary will for ever be over shadowed because it the due date of my first mmc and also the day we found out about the 2nd mmc.
As for the Royal baby I'm just going to ignore it.
And we definitely deserve some good luck for a change. I have my rmc appointment in 4 weeks, so things might start to look up soon.

5dpo ......... who oh why am I symptom spotting? For goodness sake it's probably just my dinner working it's way through but I have to try linking it to possible implantation. Someone stop me!

Welcome @MamaGeordie, sorry for your loss :(

Congratulations @PetraRabbit!

I got a faint BFP last night, I tested again tonight and the line is much darker so hopefully this will be more successful than last month. It's really early though (only 3+2 if you count the first day of bleeding after the chemical as cycle day 1) and AF isn't due til Thursday next week.

Hi everyone, I hope it's OK to join.

Age: 35
TTC #1
Referred to infertility but bfp on 16th cycle while waiting for an appointment
MMC April, 9 weeks, but baby didn't make it passed 5 weeks

I've just returned to work after a month off, the miscarriage was only confirmed as complete last week but had been told on 15th March that it was a blighted ovum. However a scan 2 weeks later showed the sac with foetal pole and yolk sac measuring 5 weeks. I then naturally miscarried a week later. It's been a long drawn out process.

I have fibroids and saw a consultant gynecologist this week. She's given us the go ahead to ttc when we feel ready as she doesn't want to mess with the fibroids.

We have an infertility clinic appointment in May which the gynecologist said we should still go to. I suspect they'll discharge us as we've had a natural conception.

@Lsmummy1 It’s hard when those close to us say these silly things. I’m sure nothing is meant by it but it’s hard to take sometimes.

@frillyfarmer @lillimum6 @Beaglemum93 I was due in Feb but was obviously already pregnnay when Meghan and Harry announced their pregnancy and I feel probably the same as you all do. Constantly hearing about her baby reminds me mine should be here and isn’t.

Thanks @Yukka We are having counselling so that might help although I could have smacked him when last session he said were dealing with this at a different “speed” 🙄

Sorry still hormonal - patiently waiting for AF

I must be the only person in this group who hasn’t actually dtd! I bought some preseed yesterday though so we can try soon and then maybe try for next cycle.

It’s 2 months today since my beautiful baby girl was born sleeping ❤️

@strawberrye sounds like perhaps your cold gave you a high temp and everything is normal. Hope this month is your month!
@frillyfarmer what a thoughtless comment from your friend. I’ve come to think no one understands unless they’ve been through it so it’s best they just say “I’m sorry” and listen.

Fortunately my friends with babies have been very kind. The best thing I was told was from a friend’s mum who’d had an early miscarriage years ago: “don’t let anyone tell you how to feel or what you should be doing.” So true.

@alicerr I am also waiting for af, how dull! I’m just powering through and trying to ignore the hormones.

@petrarabbit thank you for your positivity, what lovely news. I hope everything goes well.

@mamageordie welcome, and sorry to see you here at the same time.

@beaglemum93 great news!! I hope the line keeps getting stronger, how exciting.

@venusstar sorry to hear of your loss. Very similar to my first loss as we were also waiting for our fertility appointment. We were accepted for ivf despite falling naturally. I fell again 3 days before the appointment but baby died sadly (10 weeks, died at 8). I’m waiting to see the rmc and the fertility doc will review after that. You may well still be accepted as a successful pregnancy does not mean a live birth. I think it depends on your circumstances because we have a diagnosed condition (MFI).

I couldn’t give a shit about the royal couple’s baby news

Sorry for your losses @Mistymeow the initial fertility tests were fine but I do have a lot of fibroids. Seen a gynecologist who doesn't want to intervene and said we should continue with the referral as they may offer us some support. My initial ultrasound (before the pregnancy) picked up the fibroids and the sonographer suggested they were blocking the tubes but the gynecologist dismissed this saying he wasn't qualified or even able with his equipment to say that. But it's stuck in my head. Dh's motility is slightly low too.

I'm sorry to hear about your baby girl @AliceRR 💜 xx

Echoing everyone's thoughts about the royals!

I'm not having a great day today. Its hard as I've been OK and not crying the last couple of days and now suddenly hit me again 😢

@AliceRR we aren’t DTD either as DH has a sick bug I’ve slept in a separate room all week as I had two exams and I was not risking catching it!

My OPKs are getting darker.

@Mistymeow AF has arrived and the PMT cloud that has been over my head for 10-11 days has finally lifted

@VenusStarr Thank you and sorry to hear you’re not having a great day

@AfterLaughter Not the only one then! Sounds like you were sensible though

I've come for a moan.
Cd3 and omg the cramps are almost as bad as having medical management. It's only my 2nd af after my very drawn out 6th loss. Was hoping to give it a good try this cycle but DH has done his back in so out before we even start. This ttc journey is starting to get the better of me, fed up 😒 doesn't really cover it

Moan away @Lilimum6 This TTC journey totally sucks. Hope your DH's back is on the mend.

I'm also needing to vent. So ever since my second MC I've had spotting from about DPO 10-11. First couple of times I hoped it was implantation bleeding but have realised it's not. Today is DPO 9 and AF has turned up - not just spotting - full on red blood. I used to be so regular 27-28 day cycle. Now I'm really worried that either I'm not ovulating or my luteal phase has shortened and there is no chance of pregnancy :-(. Is it worth me seeing a doctor? I've only had two MCs (plus one CP) so not sure they will pay any attention. So so fed up and angry with my body :-(

@InDreamland I think I'm 6DPO so we're synced this cycle and I am symptom spotting like mad. Convinced myself earlier thanks to being absolutely knackered but honestly it's probably because my toddler woke for the day at 4.45am. 😬

@Lilimum6 that's annoying - can you dose him up on ibuprofen and get him back on the ride?! Bloody men, mine has been a shit this month with coming in after too many bevvies when he knows it's fertile week.

I swear TTC is sending me clinically insane.

@Frillyfarmer I thought ibuprofen killed the spermies. But I'll give it a try.

I'm miserable today bloody hormones

Hi all, sorry to all those who are struggling. Sending a hug your way xx I too am sick of royal baby news, do we really need to hear every little thing?? And don't get me started on the conspiracy nutters who think she's just got a pillow shoved up her shirt!!

Anyway, kind of did an intro post on here a while back, but haven't posted since as nothing was really happening! But would it be OK if I asked for some advice??

I am on cycle day 8. I started using cb opks yesterday, early I know, but just in case anything happened earlier than expected. I had surgical management on 11th March, got af 28 days later, so this is my first proper cycle since. The plan was to dtd every 2-3 days, started on Thursday as af cleared up on the Wednesday. So, yesterday the opk was a blank circle, as expected. Today is a flashing face?! At cd8?! Wtf??? Think we'll just stick to our plan of DTD every 2-3 days, but will make sure we do it on the day if/when a static face appears. But I'm just feeling a bit confused. Could it be my hormones just a bit higher or whatever, still from the MC? Xx

@Fivebyfive2 the empty circle first day then flashing next day happened to me everytime I used a new set. If you bought a large pack enough to do multiple cycles then the stick starts to narrow your window down in the various cycles.
All it means is your estrogen has risen since the first day and will continue to rise until you get a static smiley. I had flashing for like 5/6 days one cycle X
If you get a static very early in cycle then maybe talk to your Dr as they may want to do a blood test to check if you have actually ovulated x

@Raincart2017, thank you! Will keep testing to see what happens but will just keep dtd when we want to anyways. I got a pack of 20 so hopefully enough to see me through this cycle and at least the start of another one! Xx

So I'm 8/9 dpo and my boobs are so painfull! I've been having twinges the last couple of days but today they feel like when I was pregnant! I'm trying not to to symptom spot in this TWW as trying to focus on losing weight and exercise for our fertility appointment next month X But seems like my body wants to throw it in my face!

@Fivebyfive2 that could be right-flashing is showing your oestrogen rising and usually lasts a few days before you get static...so if you are CD8 you may not get static/peak until cd11...so try not to worry. I had a peak cd6 last month. Gp warned us that was too early so we didn't try (I guess because it's not had time to mature etc) but an embryologist the following week said there's no evidence to back that up. Just keep up your 2/3 days and you'll have a good chance.

@Lilimum6 I can understand the frustration with oh! Hugs. Sorry about the cramps too. Evil af x

Nice to hear from you @Yukka how are you?

@Beaglemum93 fingers crossed for you.

@AliceRR glad the pre af cloud has lifted for you xxx

Agree on Harry and Meghan. It's nice for them but as my due date is very similar to what I suspect hers is (I'd be 38+2 now) I really could do without the constant reminder of where I should've been with bow. @TinyPaws there is deffo an element of Brexit fatigue in the newsroom at the mo, but there's still lots of other stuff rather than every bump and fart in H&M's baby journey!

Welcome to the newbies, hugs to the old cheeses and those in between (does that make you philly? Cottage cheese?) sorry not to reply to all individually

Thanks to all for your replies after my consultant appt.

AF arrived on Friday -as expected a very short cycle of 21 days. Luteal phase static at 12/13 days though. Looks like AF is following the same short pattern. Medium flow fri, yesterday heavier, and pretty crampy/rough generally, this morning not much at all! Had my second acupuncture session this morning. not sure it's doing anything and still feeling scared of the needles but forced myself to go and it wasn't as bad as last week-didn't feel most of them.

Bit annoyed by my private consultants secretary! Saw him tues night and he said I'd get a letter with blood forms etc and what to do next, and I assumed it would be ASAP as he was very clear time is against us both for our chances and to get treatment started by my birthday in July.

Have to have a blood test tomorrow anyway (day "3" hormone check -which will be day 4 as not open today!) so I thought I could just be jabbed once...but no sign of any letter/forms so I rang the secretary and she said they hadn't been sent yet! And would prob not go in the post till Monday so I'm going to have to have more bloomin' needles. I know I have to get used to them if we're doing ivf but It's frustrating! I'm going to need shares in ametop gel at this rate.

Did manage to speak to the sperm test nurse for OH...his gp was a bit clueless. As we live so close to the centre he'll be allowed to do his sample at home. She's also going to try and get him an appt a bit sooner than the standard three weeks. Although I'm in a bit of a quandary...she's likely to get the referal docs this week, so potentially if there's a slot he could have his test week after next...but that's due to be fertile week so I don't really want us to miss that chance as he'll have to abstain! So I'm kinda hoping she won't have an appt till the start of may. Is that mad? If she offers one during fertile week should we bite the bullet and go for it? Just kinda desperate to try naturally just in case we can do it again and it works out.

But then part of me says the ivf seems to offer us better chances of a good embryo...

Arghhh I'm all sixes and sevens! Brain can't compute. 'Puter says NOoooooo...

Aarrrrghhhh I can't stop thinking about wanting to be pregnant again. Those fertile 6 months after mc is quickly disappearing. Have until next month so 1 more cycle. 8dpo today. This is painful and after DH's results I'm not confident it'll happen for us now.

@VenusStarr hmm yes sounds like going ahead with the fertility appointment is a good idea. I would also say that the sonographer shouldn't be making comments like that! Also when I had my fertility appointment the consultant said having my tubes looked at was pointless because I'd been pregnant, obviously my tubes were clear. Has your partner been taking the vitamins (this has helped with my DH's sperm, as well as cutting back on alcohol and caffeine/getting in shape)? Sorry you're still feeling down but it's completely normal and will take time- allow yourself these moments to feel sad. It will get easier.
@AliceRR glad the pmt cloud has passed, and you can start looking to the next cycle! It always feels better getting cd1 out of the way :)
@lilimum6 urrrgh, that's really annoying. I hope you're feeling a little better today? I hope you get some luck soon, you really deserve it.
@Newbie21 how long ago was your mc? Sometimes it can take some months for the hormones to settle. I think if you are having pre-af spotting when it's not normal for you, you should get it checked out. Your GP could do a day 21 progesterone test to see if you're ovulating (and also to put your mind at rest). I've been on this thread for a year and it seems that most of us have had problems with our cycles regulating.
@Raincart2017 fingers crossed for you! 8/9 dpo is the worst point as you start getting all the progesterone symptoms and it's usually too early to test! Drives me mad :)
@Laney79 I would be inclined to ask for the appointment to be outside of your fertile window, unless it means waiting a long time (the sperm test at our local hospital is a 3 month wait!). See what they come back with. But it's really good you are on the right track and taking action, very promising.
@InDreamland I understand, it's such a long slog for you both. What's the next step for your dh? Urologist appointment?

I don't really know what's happening with me. 13 dpo and expecting af today. I had the worst cramps yesterday (I expected this as it's the first af since the ERPC and the one last year was really painful). But today nothing. I don't dare test and now I'm thinking what if I have scarring? I might test on wednesday. I used to test all the time before the last loss but this time I find it too scary.