TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 24 🐧🐧

[RedRobin7]

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Here's the new thread. This is a lovely supportive thread for anyone who has suffered the loss of a much wanted baby. Affectionately known as the penguin huddle- this is the place to survive the ups and downs of this crazy journey.

Kicking off with a roll call:

RedRobin7
Age: 29
TTC #1
MMC at 12 weeks in March 18
MC at 6 weeks in July 18
Waiting one cycle before getting back on the bus!

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Checking?

@zarala I didn't wonder where everyone has been for the last 8 hours 😂

I did... not didn't 🙄

@zarala haha i keep thinking the same, iv been trying to diet but sometimes think, ah maybe ill be pregnant soon, so be fat amyway😂
I agree about reading old threads, it does show how much you have healed.

@Mum2BinChina sorry you are going through that uncertainty, lets hope its not as bad as you think.

@Boboelephant Have a great holiday!

@RedRobin7 How was your day with your nephew?

@crazyhorseylady Hi and welcome, hope hcg goes down for you soon. I remember it took be about 2 weeks to get a neg

@InDreamland You don't sound nuts, you kind of sound like me back in march. I know its hard but you need to try and be strong and each day things get a little easier. Also you don't know that it will take you as long to conceive, the body is full of surprises!

Xx

@littleemma1 Sorry for bfn and you too @Blondcat

Sorry to those iv missed, welcome to those who have joined. Hugs to those that need it.

Also where has everyone been?

Age 36
TTC#3
1 natural mc , 1 mmc and 1 chemical since march 2017.
Cycle 5 since last mc

Very miffed to say I'm not in this month due to DH's work (he's away during FW which started yesterday)

Sending baby dust to everyone

@RedRobin7 sorry didn't call in sooner I've been sulking

@Boboelephant Thanks so much and for the yoga tip... I’ve been a bit rubbish today and haven’t managed anything sensible, but tomorrow is another day...

@RedRobin7 thank you! Not the greatest birthday I’ve ever had but as I was still being a bit antisocial to avoid having to make non-drinking excuses, I hadn’t got anything planned, and DH made a fuss of me which was nice.

@zarala Thanks so much for sharing your post. It’s weirdly comforting reading about other people’s experiences 🐧

@InDreamland I was very close to bailing on family, I have to confess! I tried going out this afternoon just to leave the house and it wasn’t a great success, I think taking the time you need sounds very sensible.

Well i think AF is starting...brown spotting and tummy pain this eve-so added to my really low mood (I'm assuming is PMS but I've never really had it before thanks to the pill) I'm 99% certain she'll kick in with a vengeance tomorrow...sadly that means I'll also be on for my birthday. The knocks keep coming

Had counselling today-cried my way through it pretty much. It helped a bit. Just wish I could relax and stop feeling so desperate to be pregnant again! Argh!

Glad it wasn't only me @RedRobin7 and @zarala -I thought my app had given up!

@Lilimum4 don't blame you for sulking-think I would too

@InDreamland hugs. It's just a horrific thing to go through, but we're all here. I'm not sure what idve done without the forums. Helped me retain what little sanity I have left. X

Evening ladies,

Hope everyone is OK. I've just got back from visiting my Nan in hospital and the ward that she is on is directly opposite the EPU ward so it brought back some sad memories of the day I found out that my sac was empty 🙁

I'm not sure how long this AF will last as it's the first since the miscarriage. I did a pregnancy test a couple of weeks ago which was negative so I think I'm out of the woods in that sense. Would I be OK to TTC once AF is finished? Or should I ideally wait for another AF? Having to wait another month will feel like forever 😤

Age 42
MMC on 25th April 2018, baby estimated to have passed away around 9-10 weeks but only came out naturally after 13 weeks.
TTC baby no 4
Currently CD7, started digital OPK testing and going to try SMEP.
Cycle no 3 since MMC.
@RedRobin7 You are so positive and such an inspiration! Keep going xxx

Thanks @Mistymeow. Hope your af passes soon and you can get your hormones back in check. I don't ovulate until day 17 so think our twindom might be over. It was a pleasure!
@Mum2BinChina I'm so sorry it is not looking good. Fingers crossed for a miracle for you but we are all here for you if you need us.
@Laney79 Malta!!! 🌞🌞🌞 sorry it looks like af. 😟
@zarala oh I know what you mean. I constantly think i should eat salads and lose weight and then go eh, enjoy it now before you're pregnant! 🤦‍♀️🤦‍♀️
@Bobzybaby sending hugs. I have dealt with alot of those lately and they are super tough.
@UnicornsandRainbows1 I'm not surprised hun considering your other losses but I have every faith that in about 3 months time you'll be holding your precious bundle.
@daisyfrau welcome and I'm so sorry for your losses. We're a bit similar. Close in age, DC close in age and ectopic and MC. I also struggle with accepting that my family doesn't look like I hoped or expected. There should have been less than 2 years between my kids if I hadn't had the ectopic and now it's getting close to 4! And still not pregnant. I hope it happens for us both soon.
@crazyhorseylady welcome and I'm so sorry for your loss.
@Virgo89 I think you can absolutely crack on after af.

Ok off to bed as leaving for holidays tomorrow morning!!! 🌞🌞 Thanks for all the well wishes!

@boboelephant Hope you have a great holiday, I'm jealous! 🌞

@Virgo89 The midwife at the EPU told me it was fine to start trying as soon as you get a negative pregnancy test. So I’d say go for it :)
Welcome to all the new people. Very sorry you find yourselves here though, but is a really supportive group xx

Have a lovely holiday @Boboelephant ☀️ 🍹 You deserve it!

@Boboelephant have lovely holiday hun x

Enjoy Malta @Boboelephant I loved going over to Gozo and seeing Mdina when I went.

I was right-AF has arrived. Hey ho. Back to cd1 for me.

@Boboelephant enjoy your holiday xx

@boboelephant hope you have a lovely holiday in Malta. You must go to Mdina and have the best pastizzi on the island at Crystal Palace in Rabat (just outside Mdina gate on Triq St Pawl). About 30 cents each for warm pastry yummy goodness!

Sorry to hear about AF @Laney79 and sorry to hear you are having a tough time at the moment feeling desperate to be pregnant again. I know how you feel, I find unless my mind is completely occupied by something else thoughts about TTC and my miscarriages are constant. It's exhausting and I hope your counselling is helping xx

Morning ladies!

@YellowDaffodils86 I had a nice day with my niece and nephew yesterday but felt overwhelmed by the end of it. I rushed home and then my sister text me worrying that she'd upset me somehow. Then I felt guilty! I am so grateful for them though and I will be fine soon. How are you doing?

I did a test today and was pleased to see it's negative. It's so hard to see a negative but it was also painful to see a positive test after my SMM in April and I had to have another scan - so I'm glad I don't have to go through that again.

@GPS76 That doesn't sound like me, maybe you tagged the wrong person 😉 but thank you!!

@ronniemipperton Glad your husband made a fuss. I've told mine I don't want to celebrate my 30th and I'm sure he will listen to that completely lol. Hope you are feeling stronger soon. It's a painful road but I'm very pleased I have this group to support me.

@littleemma1 Hope you had an amazing honeymoon! Sorry to hear you are feeling down.

@Lilimum4 Sorry you're out this month. We'll be in the next one together!

@Laney79 I'm glad you had a good cry at counselling, it really does help if you have the right person to talk to. I didn't find counselling helped me as my counsellor told me she had a life threatening illness which made it hard for me to tell her that I struggle with life. Hope you are feeling a little stronger today.

@Boboelephant Enjoy your holiday! Send us some photos to make us jealous!

I'm driving myself mad with ovulation testing! Day 3 of a flashing smiley on my advanced CB but cheapies finally arrived and of course I couldn't help testing - sad to see there's hardly a second line. Cycles not settled after mc in end of March but I'm now on cd21.

Could I just be ov super late, the test didn't pick it up or might I get the estrogen bit without the lh surge and ovulation this cycle?

Thank you! I wish I'd never started this testing thing, it's just another cause of disappointment and stress!!

@doddlebobs do you think maybe you didn't ovulate this month? The CB digital starts flashing when your levels start increasing but that could just be your oestrogen rising?

When I was testing, I did the cheapies too from around day 12 onwards in the afternoon just to double check and there was a fainter but definite line which got darker as the days went on - even when i had an empty circle on CB digital. I only had one day of a flashy smiley, the cheaper test picked up a strong line that evening and the following morning I had a static.

Also are you following the instructions on CB? Only using FMU and did you start on your correct cycle day? The first month I used them I started too late and it was all over the place! By testing on the correct first day (CD9 for me) the digital thingy detects a baseline which it can then use to track your progress and the levels of hormones. If you start too late or test at weird times in the day or multiple times a day it can be thrown off a bit and may not be so accurate. That month I went from all empty circles to a big fat static smiley all of a sudden!

@Boboelephant have a fab holiday, you deserve this relaxation time!!
@Laney79 we must be at the same points in cycles as my AF spotting started yesterday and I’ve woken up to full flow today.

I’m feeling better now that I’m out of the limbo am I or aren’t I pregnant?

We just found out on Wednesday night a cousin is expecting due 17th Jan which is 1 week before our EDD.
This means I now have a close friend due 1 week after and a cousin 1 week before.
I’m not jealous or even envious of them, I’m thrilled for them both as they’ve both had their own problems conceiving and I’ve been close to them both about it, but I’m still sad for my loss.
I wrote everything down that I was feeling yesterday and it really helped so I’m thinking I might start a blog xxx

Morning ladies. Af still a no show but feeling a bit like she is now on her way.

@boboelephant hope you have a fab holiday I love Malta though find it a bit too warm this time of year cos I am a wuss with heat .

@laney79 sorry for af
@littleemma1 sorry for the bfn

Hugs anyone who needs them.

Sorry to those who have had the unwanted visitor this month and those with BFNs.

Welcome to the new joiners and sorry you find yourself here but it is a wonderful forum to find support, let of steam, and, even though our common ground is a bad experience, we have a few giggles too and can share in the excitement of the BFPs.

@Boboelephant have a great holiday! I'm sure it is just what you need x

Thinking of all who are a bit down at the moment and hope things improve for you all.

@RedRobin7 is the house now puppy proof??? Or is that a job for the weekend? How exciting, puppy arrives on Monday right?

AF due tomorrow and I can feel slight cramps so not hopeful but we'll see.