TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 24 🐧🐧

[RedRobin7]

🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧

Here's the new thread. This is a lovely supportive thread for anyone who has suffered the loss of a much wanted baby. Affectionately known as the penguin huddle- this is the place to survive the ups and downs of this crazy journey.

Kicking off with a roll call:

RedRobin7
Age: 29
TTC #1
MMC at 12 weeks in March 18
MC at 6 weeks in July 18
Waiting one cycle before getting back on the bus!

🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧🐧

@robin78 Haha we like to make sure people are awake 😉

Just want to apologise if I offended anyone by saying I feel like I've failed having reached 30 with no children... I appreciate quite a few people are older than me on here and I was only meaning that my personal target hasn't be reached so I'm a bit miffed.

@YellowDaffodils86 Mines on the 7th, how about yours?

@TedLife totally agree! I've seen me reading screeds of text about various things and it never actually concluding when I then feel so involved 😂

@YellowDaffodils Ty. I just have to hope that while it wasn't my time then, it will come. And it is a pretty cool job!

@RedRobin For my part, none taken . I used to be in the exact same mind frame you were. By 30 my Mum had had 4 children, while we hadn't even reached the starting blocks so to speak. Instead we opted to get settled (house, married, jobs) before TTC. Ofc we thought it would be easier than it has been, but even knowing what we do now, we would still wait.

Hi everyone,

Age 34
TTC#1 since 2016
MMC in April (9 weeks, erpc 2 weeks later for retained tissue)
Cycle 3 since miscarriage
DH will receive hormone treatment this month to increase fertility

Sorry to see new people join under such sad circumstances. Lots of love, with you every step of the way x

Hello all, another new thread already!

strawberrye

Age 27
TTC#1
MC Jan 2018 at 5-6 weeks
MC April 2018 at 5 weeks
Currently 4th cycle TTC since most recent miscarriage, but DH away during fertile week so I think this cycle is a non starter. Roll on August!

Hi all, checking in to the new thread
Age 36 (37 in a couple of weeks)
Ttc #1
Mc at 6 weeks in April
Cycle 3 since mc

@knitkitty still no sign of af now one day late and feeling similar to when I was pregnant before (hot in the middle of my body and tired but have insomnia). Too scared to test today but may brave it out tomorrow if af is a no show.

Hello everyone, checking in!

PurpleFushia
Age: 36
TTC #2
MC at 11 weeks in May 2018
On third cycle since MC and feeling optimistic! Thanks for the opk advice on the end of the last thread, hopefully it's going to help with feeling confident about timings. Results have gone from nothing yesterday (CD10) to a good line today, still lighter than the control but feels like a good idea to get going tonight! Apps say I'm not supposed to ovulate until next Monday (will be CD16) or Tuesday but I'm not convinced now, think it might be earlier. We'll see!

Hi all

TinyPaws checking in

32, TTC#1
Part of a same sex couple using donor IUI
Medically managed MMC in April 2018 at 10 weeks (but embryo at 6 weeks and sac at 8 weeks)

7dpo, swinging between being utterly convinced I'm pregnant and being utterly convinced I'm not pregnant. Time will tell.

@TedLife haha I've so been there!
It really is so frustrating!
@RedRobin7 no offence taken! I too had a life plan to have at least 2 kids before 30- but hey ho I didn't get married until I was 33 and even tho I'm not a traditional type of girl I wanted to wait!
@Blondcat ooh sounds promising! Hope you bring the first bit of good news to this thread ! Fx
I've just booked my flight back to London to see oh will get there on cd 9 so just in time for sexy week and JKS! Can't wait !

@Blondcat everything crossed for you for tomo 🤞🏻

Thanks for the new thread!

I'm 30.
TTC #1
MMC in March.
Currently cycle 4 post MC and on CD19. Think I ovulated 2 days ago.
Had CP cycle 2 after MC.
Trying since Dec 2017

Just thought I'd share my MMC info for anyone currently going through it:
I fell pregnant in January but didn't find out until Feb 18th (CD40) as just when I was about to test I started bleeding and had what I thought was a period. Since the period was much lighter than I was used to, I took a test a few days later on the off chance, however wasn't expecting a BFP because of the bleeding and thought since I hadn't been off the pill for very long it was just my body getting used to things again.
Lo and behold, I got a BFP. Because of the bleeding I was referred to EPAS and had my first scan when I should have been 6 and a half weeks. On that scan they could see a yolk sac but nothing else and said I might not be as far along as expected. (Bleeding had now stopped).
I had another scan 10 days later and they could now see a fetal pole measuring just under 4mm, but couldn't see a heart beat. They said that the heartbeat might not be visible yet because of the size, but again, I could be earlier on in the pregnancy than they were expecting.
Another scan was booked in for a week later. That's when they gave me the bad news that Little Pea hadn't grown and I was having a MMC.
I went home to mull over my options, and 4 days later had medical management. This didn't work. I had another scan to confirm this. I then had a second lot of medical management. Same thing again. Another scan confirmed the pregnancy was still firmly in place.
I then opted for surgical management which I had on 27th March (should have been 10 and a bit weeks).
It took a further 4 weeks for HCG to leave my system and another week after that to get first AF (4th May).

Now I'll catch up with all the new posts...

Hey everyone

Thanks @RedRobin7 for the new post. Marking my spot and hoping I can keep up better with this one as have been a bit rubbish recently.

Username: Jessabean
Age: 29
TTC: number 1
MC history:
Natural miscarriage of a 6 week pregnancy at 8 weeks ruining the Christmas period by starting day before Christmas Eve and finishing just before New Years.
Then fell pregnant first cycle post mc in January (no AF- it can happen!) but MMC found out at 12 week scan end of March. Pregnancy stopped at ~10 weeks after a healthy heartbeat on a scan at 9 weeks 🙁.

Am on cycle 4 post miscarriage now though this is only second month of trying.
Had a temp spike this morning & pretty sure I ovulated late Monday evening but am taking it as 1dpo at the moment. Happy to hang up the grapefruit juice. Pineapple is way better.

Reading through the profiles everyone is posting and it's heartbreaking the number of you who have had more than 1 mc. It's bad enough anyone could have even 1 mc but multiple is just something that no words can describe how sad it is.

You're all so strong to just keep going in pursuit of that BFP and healthy full term baby - RESPECT!

Hi to those I haven't seen before: xJune88, Dyra, Happysbno4

Dyra it must be hard having a job where you see pregnant ladies all the time.xxx What CD/DPO are you?

zarala I'm feeling really hopeful for you with your medication. I think things will happen successfully soon. :)

YellowDaffodiles86 I hadn't realised our stats were so similar; similar age, TTC for almost same amount of time, both on cycle 4 after loses in March and now both in TTW!!! What CD/DPO are you?

Hi Russkispy, it took HCG 4 weeks to leave my system after ERPC. The waiting is frustrating and horrible. Hugs xxx

TedLife I also read TTC threads and look at squinter posts all the time... it's a bit addictive!

sweetpea0318 glad to hear you didn't get any O pains before BFP, that's comforting.
I'm on the fence about OPKs and temping. I have a feeling that for me I would become to overly stressed about it all if I did it. Obviously it's stressful not knowing for sure when you've ovulated, so there's that, but knowing myself I think it would become all I think about and I don't feel it's healthy for me to be that way. I am reserving them for if I don't conceive again within a year I think.

RedRobin7 I agree with YellowDaffodils86 that you should celebrate your birthday! I never had plans set in stone for when I wanted a family, but I've been broody since I was 26 and waiting for OH to give me a go-ahead. He finally agreed that once I hit 30 we could start trying, as he said he wanted me to be able to properly celebrate my birthday.
Think of it this way, new decade, fresh start! Your thirties could be the best years of your life yet!!! Leave the sadness of unfulfilled dreams and unsuccessful pregnancies in your 20s and allow your 30s to be an exciting time of new beginnings and happy things! That's worth celebrating!!!

strawberrye hope you find this cycle a good chance to take some time for you. xxx

Blondcat I totally understand that fear. Fingers crossed for you. Hope you pluck up the courage to test in the morning! xxx

TinyPaws Fingers and toes firmly crossed for you. When will you be testing?

Jessabean Hey MC and Cycle buddy! It would be so cool if we both had health beans at the same time too! Fingers crossed for you! xxx

Read through the posts in the old thread quickly; thank you to those who replied to me.
I am working on the assumption that I ovulated on Monday. I usually get O pain and then a day later CM turns from EWCM to white/clumpy. As RedRobin7 said, maybe I ovulated during the night so didn't feel anything. OR maybe the reiki on day of ovulation stopped it being painful!?!
I've been feeling emotional today, had a bit of a cry at work. I think I'm just feeling that this isn't my month and I'm tired of trying and hoping and trying again. But I'm bouncing back again. I got some lovely support from my colleagues and I'm feeling more cheerful again.

It's fascinating reading through all of your stories. So sad to think of so many little beans that haven't made it, but comforting at the same time to know we're not in this alone.
xxx

Right, who's going to be the first BFP of this thread?
My money is on Blondcat!

Hidcat how are you? You've been on my mind today...

@RedRobin7
You didnt offend me any way by the way, just to let you know.
Ah im the 10th! Friday birthday this year for you!

@Bobzybaby and @TedLife me too, never an outcome!

@Dyra your time will definitely come.
I love medicine, both human and animal, but chose the latter.

@Blondcat 🤞🤞🤞

@InDreamland i agree, im amazed by what some have been through.
I do enjoy the roll call as its nice to refresh on the info of everyone. I can never remember as the thread moves on.
But sometimes it also saddens me to see how common mc is and what women go through. The subject definitely needs more awareness!

I'm new to Mumsnet so am finding myself constantly googling the acronyms to find out what everything means - it's a bit like reading another language at times lol.

@Newbie21 Thank you for your reply. I'm not quite up to scratch with all the technical terms of a miscarriage - not even sure what my own is classed as seeing as the foetus didn't start to develop as the sac was empty.. I was lucky in the sense that it was a natural miscarriage and I didn't have to have a surgical procedure like you did. Hope everything is OK with you since the procedure.

@KnitKitty Thank you for welcoming me to the thread. My period seems to have returned today after being 'on pause' yesterday evening/this morning. Yes, I'd say Monday was proper bleeding - wouldn't describe it as spotting. It seems to be carrying on now so hopefully it lasts a few more days so I can class it as my first period. Hope you're feeling a little better now. I'm still trying to get to terms with all the technical parts of conceiving like cycle days and ovulating and whatnot, so sorry I can't offer you any advice, but hope you're feeling better.

@Mistymeow Sorry to hear that you've been through what I have. I was completely shocked. I'm a complete worrier so I honestly thought I would be told that everything was fine so I was absolutely gutted when they told me that the sac was empty. My period seems to have carried on since early afternoon so hopefully it'll be more than just a couple of days. The doctor said to wait for my first period and then I'd be OK to try again, so I'm thinking we'll try again once my period has finished.

@robin78 Thank you. Yes, I did a pregnancy test on 29th June and it was negative. Hopefully that means I'm OK to TTC again once my 'period' has finished. I'm very confused about cycle days and whatnot - going to have to do lots of reading up so I can follow everything that you guys are saying. Will probably be in my best interest too so I'll know the best times to 'DTD' (I'm trying out the acronyms, hopefully I learn more soon lol)

@YellowDaffodils86 Yes I am a Virgo, my birthday is 24th August, when is yours? My period has since resumed so I'm quite excited to class this as an actual period and to TTC again once it has finished..

Very nervous about trying again. I'm a worrier as it is, let alone now that the first pregnancy didn't develop... How long has everyone else been TTC? I'm curious how long it will be before I fall pregnant again (hopefully I will!). I fell pregnant quite quickly the first time around, so we shall see....

@KnitKitty Thanks, I'm supposed to test Wednesday next week (14 dpo) but I'm probably going to test early over the weekend. I have a 12 day LP so period should be here before Wednesday anyway!

Can anyone tell me how to make the little penguin emoticon?

Hello everyone. Oh wow i really feel part of something having made the jump from joining a thread to roll call of the next. Big love ladies - thanks for your support so far!

I'm 34 (35 next month, yikes)
Ttc #2 (dd 19 months conceived cycle 3)
Mmc in Late March discovered at 12 week scan (i more like 13 weeks), baby died at 10 weeks but had seen heartbeat at private scan at 9 weeks, and was morning sickness sicky up until the day after my d+c)
Cycle 3 post MC, cd19 and ov any day after flashing smiley this morning!
Followjing Smep this month and enjoying it much more than the frantic shagging last 2 cycles every time i saw a drop of ewcm!!

Amazed to see I'm mc and cycle buddies with @KnitKitty And @Jessabean. Hope we can be pregnant pals in the next few weeks and months!!

Hello! Please can I join?

TTC #2
DS1 aged 3
Age 37
TTC since September 2017
MMC May 2018 at 10 weeks, measured c.6 weeks (had seen heartbeat on scan at 5.6)

Currently in the tww of second cycle since getting back on it, have been lurking for a while. Fingers crossed for everyone.

Haha! @robin78 what day is yours? Mines Tuesday 24th. Sadly the way I feel today I suspect AF will be visiting...bloomin typical!

Hello to all the newbies. Sorry you find yourself here. These ladies are awesome.

Had a slight bit of good news-GP has referred me to the consultant birth options clinic even though I'm not pregnant so I can discuss my fears and my request for a c section should I ever get to the stage of needing one. Scary, but at least I'll be able to talk it through.

Off to counselling tomorrow. Struggling to fight the low mood-but guessing it may be pmt-never really experienced it as I was on the pill for so long. I just hope if there's no BFP this month then we can catch next month so I don't have to feel like this again. And i think I'm right in saying if we did that would mean a may-Ish due date? If so my oh would love it-says best people are born in May (him and his nana!)

Hi All,

Age 37 (38 in about a fortnight)
TTC 1st
MMC June 2018 at 12 weeks 1 day (measured 7 weeks)

Awaiting first cycle after MC to get back in the game x

Hi @KnitKitty 👋

Sorry I hadn't replied yet. We really are cycle buddies at the moment! @doddlebobs great to have you as a cycle buddy too! I hope this is all our month.
@KnitKitty sorry to hear you had a bad day. Hope you feel more at peace soon. I had a bit of a weird day yesterday- started off feeling really happy and at peace then in the afternoon all seemed to change and I started feeling really anxious and tearful again about everything. Not sure why really. I think over lunch was maybe a small thing which reminded me that is weird that I would have been on matty leave and getting ready to give birth soon (first mc) so maybe it was that. Today have felt fine again though. Is still strange how it hits you sometimes. I guess we just have to go with the emotions as best we can day to day. It may not be this cycle or the next that it happens but it will eventually - we'll get there! Fingers crossed for us it's our time now though 🤞
My exams not until October but it is like the mother of all exams so if I stand any chance in passing I need to start now- am also quite stressed that the first day of the exam falls on my due date (second mmc) which doesn't sit great psychologically but 🤷‍♀️ career wise I don't unfortunately don't have any option but to sit it really. Already about a year behind with my training. Am mentally using it more as a trial run though to help me get through it!
So true with the whole trying to plan TTC around life. We'll just have to do what we need to and see what happens. After what we've been through I'm sure true friends and family will completely understand & be happy for us!

Age: 39
TTC #1
MC#1 Feb-18 at 6wks
MC#2 May-18 at 11wks (both natural)
I've had 1 AF since MC in June, now on CD26 so may test on the weekend if no AF - I've not had "normal" AF for years so not sure how long my cycles are.

I do read the thread every so often but it keeps moving so fast - but I appreciate this thread a lot