TTC after pregnancy loss - thread 24 🐧🐧

[RedRobin7]

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Here's the new thread. This is a lovely supportive thread for anyone who has suffered the loss of a much wanted baby. Affectionately known as the penguin huddle- this is the place to survive the ups and downs of this crazy journey.

Kicking off with a roll call:

RedRobin7
Age: 29
TTC #1
MMC at 12 weeks in March 18
MC at 6 weeks in July 18
Waiting one cycle before getting back on the bus!

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TinyPaws Huge hugs. As Laney79 said, is there any chance that was left over from the medication and you might be implanting late??

That looks beautiful Boboelephant! Enjoy, relax and JKS!

Laney79 I'm afraid I don't have any experience of what's happening to you, but I do know it's normal for periods to be different post MC. As Newbie21 said, if you get another AF and it's the same, ask GP for peace of mind.

Sorry Newbie21 I hope AF arrives soon so you can get on with your next cycle then. xxx

RE: vitamins, I take pregnacare and an extra dose of folic acid prescribed by GP as I have spina bifida occulta so am at higher risk for spina bifida.

@tinypaws, hope there’s still a chance there for you! Keep us posted. Big hugs.
Didn’t bother to HPT this morning as read everywhere to best to wait when HCG levels dropped completely and then DTD. As I’m getting blood tests tomorrow, I hope to get results back same week.

@littleemma1 ha yep your accent is pretty strong, cant mistake a geordie accent!

@Russkispy ah gravesend, im a bit further down near Canterbury.

@InDreamland i only collected one, they are stashed away somewhere now. Ohh love lemon drizzle!!

@robin78 its strange how you only find these things out when you have been through it yourself. Probably dhows we should all talk about it more.

@Bath072019 Happy bding😜

@KnitKitty Dont worry im doing the same! ss-holic! Google is also getting its monthly hammering too!

@TinyPaws Dont give up hope just yet. Hugs.

@Laney79 Pregnecare or seven seas, i think.

9dpo ahhh hurry up. Dont think bd was timed very well this month though. Pretty sure af will arrive when expected.

So sorry @tinypaws and @newbie21. Xx

@yelledaffodils86 that was exactly what I was thinking. Because Mc is still so hushed up it means we can miss out on supporting people who are close to us who might be going through the same thing.

@laney79 I remember reading that as well as mc interfering with our cycles that after any pregnancies (whether ending in mc or not) periods can change. It is like pressing the reset button. So different isn’t neccesarlily bad!

I am also up for the London meet up btw. Just need to work out how to send a dm on mumsnet!

@Laney79 the three periods I've had since mc have been similar to yours. Really heavy for 2 days (tampon and pad on the first night), followed by a day of really light and another day or so of spotting. I put it down to being wonky post mc.

In terms of vitamins etc I just take a combined folic acid and vit d. I tried the conception multivits but made me feel sick.

@robin78 thanks for sharing your experience - looks like I've had a similar one! Day 23 and static smiley and matching pink lines!! Just a few of my 2 weeks worth of ov attaches 🤣

Typical just had a massive barney with DH about him snapping at DD so not looking like an afternoon BD is on the cards as if hoped! Hopefully friends again by this evening!!

@doddlebobs Ah glad you got your static smiley! I've a feeling I might be in for a repeat of the last cycle as I'm cd16 with my fifth flashing smiley in a row. Hope you guys can kiss and make up!

Probably shouldn't have gone to see Mamma Mia 2 straight after a miscarriage... I'm a mess 🙈

It was funny though... but I was a laughing crying mess!

@KnitKitty just reread your message. Hope you had a lovely time out. I totally know what you mean. I work in an area where teenage pregnancy is common so am so aware that when working with 16 year old clients that I am often older than their mum's! 😟 also thankyou! Not in fw until after holiday so no stress and totally relaxing!! I have even forgotten to take my temp the last two days!
@Lilimum4 glad you had a nice day.
@TinyPaws so sorry hun. I missed your first comment about a line but that sounds crap.
@Laney79 I'm not too sure hun although I'm sure it's not a problem. As others have said periods after MC can be different and a bit messed up for the first 6 months or so. Also I am taking the seven seas ttc.
@Newbie21 sorry for the bfn.
@Blondcat sorry for af hun.
@YellowDaffodils86 fingers crossed for you hun!
@robin78 hit the three dots under the person's post to private message.
@doddlebobs hope you make up!!

Hope everyone is ok! Thinking of you from the sunshine!

Thanks guys. I've emailed my EPAU nurse to ask about the super quick AF (unless she kicks off again I think I'll be clear tomorrow-only started thurs eve ) so fingers crossed I'll get an answer. @doddlebobs I'll let you know what she says!

Vitamins wise...I'm tempted to start the pregnacare pre conception ones-fella is also willing to take the bloke version. I'm just worried I'd be taking too much folic acid with the high dose 5mg the GP has prescribed. Going to ask a medic mate see what she says. I also take a vit d tablet but assuming if I take the pregnacare I won't need that.

@RedRobin7 ooh I was hoping to see that this week! Would you recommend?

@Russkispy That's a fab list-although it must take some time to make sure you are taking it all! Prob a little complicated for me-i struggle to remember a couple of pills!!!

@Boboelephant Enjoy the Hols! I'm itching to book another break, but equally don't want to in case we're lucky enough to get a BFP!

@Laney79 It's really good, I highly recommend it! It's cheesy but good cheesy! I was laughing so much at a couple of scenes that I had to pinch myself to stop the laughter because nobody else was laughing as much as me! Then I cried lots too lol.

I've been on pregnacare pre-conception for nearly 3 years now. I should probably have shares in the company! I swapped to the pregnant ones both times but I've kept them in the cupboard and gone back to pre-conception ones.

@Boboelephant Thanks for the pic - Looks lovely! Enjoy 😊

RedRobin7 Sounds like a good laugh/cry was probably needed. Glad it did make you laugh at least...

Boboelephant I actually had a good time last night. Let off some steam dancing. Took my mind off everything. :) Sounds like you're relaxing well. Enjoy!!!

Laney79 I take both pregnacare and 5mg folic acid. GP said it was fine as you can't really over-dose on folic acid, you pee out any that your body doesn't use, so you should be fine to do both. :)

YellowDaffodils86 I've been Googling too... Why do we do this to ourselves when we know it's all the same symptoms as with AF??? I got a boob pain yesterday and felt excited for a minute, as I never get boob pains (didn't even in last pregnancy), and then told myself off (nicely) for being a lunatic! haha

Does anyone else watch a lot of Youtube videos? It's my guilty pleasure. I watched a video earlier by a woman talking about pregnancy after MC and I liked the advice she was giving.
She's had 3 miscarriages and one healthy pregnancy (her 4th one) and was saying that we should feel the joy and excitement of each pregnancy from the beginning. She said her first pregnancy was filled with worries because she hadn't gone through it before and was worried about losing it, and then she did; the second and third MCs she had she was anxious and worried and gloomy about everything because of the previous loss. She said the outcome would have been the same whether she was joyful or fearful, and if she had been joyful up until losing them at least she would have had that time being happy rather than low.
I understand what she means, although I don't think it's something that you can easily control.
But it also got me wondering if during her 4th pregnancy she found it easier to be happy about it because her body somehow new that this one was the one which was going to work...
I'm rambling, apologies.

@RedRobin7 ah no, Iv decided not to see it for that reason. Even the trailer narks me.
@KnitKitty iv no idea why we do it. This time lady cycle i had lotiony cm and i do now, quite alot, so i wonder well that onvs means nothing! However my when i was pregnant last time, i was 'wet' (uh tmi) and lots cm right up to bfp.🤷🏻‍♀️
Iv also got heavy sore bbs, not massively but more than i have other cycles.
Who knows.

Earlier i got caught up in tww and ttc and was starting to get down and miserable.
So went upstairs to play on my seeing machine. I ended up starting a quilt made from scraps of material left from my wedding bunting. Took my mind off things at least... would make a nice quilt for a little baby girl🤞

Thanks @KnitKitty -I'll get some tomorrow. Fella has said he'll take the boys ones too so seems like a plan.

@RedRobin7 hopefully I'll catch it this week then-could do with a giggle!

hello, could I ask some advice please, I seem to have a 34 or 35 day cycle. does that mean my ovulation date is more likely to move back so it is still 14 days post ovulation that I can I expect my period?
My app suggests I will ovulate tomorrow but clear blue ovulation this morning was a big empty circle. x a

@Laney79 thanks hun. Hope you get an answer.
@RedRobin7 haha pinch yourself. That made me laugh!
@KnitKitty I think that's a lovely way of thinking about it. When we decide something with our mind it can have powerful effects. Power of positive thinking!
@YellowDaffodils86 quilt sounds lovely. When will you test?
@dreaminofholidays yes you would ovulate later. Your luteal phase (between ov and af) stays the same and the follicular phase can vary. So I used to have 34 day cycles and would ovulate day 22. I now ovulate day 17 of a 29 day cycle and have a 12 day LP. If you're not sure of your LP length just take 14 days from the length of cycle and you should ovulate around then.

Obviously it doesn't matter this month but FF app says I ovulated on CD ten. But I think that can't be good as my egg would be released way to early to be mature. What do you ladies think

Wow I have finally caught up with all the posts.
I’m 41
Ttc number 2 ds is 11 next week!
Mc September 17 at 6/7 weeks
Mmc/d and c May 8 weeks
But am now on summer holidays (I’m a teacher) so I am hoping I go back to work in September with a little surprise. My dh works abroad but will be back next Monday and my plan to jks.

Welcome @Martydog
Question ladies: just done HPT and finally negative after just over 3 weeks after D&C. Does that mean my HCG levels dropped completely to zero and/or undetectable levels?!

Morning ladies! Was a busy weekend so didn't get a chance to keep up with the chat. I've had a quick read through (should really be getting ready for work 🙄) and just want to say hi and hugs to everyone who needs them! The convo moves so quickly to reply to everyone individually!

I live in Scotland so I'm gutted I can't join you ladies for a London meet up!

I hope you all have a lovely day x

@Russkispy the midwife told me that once a test was negative they took it as all the hormone being gone. I did ask if there could be any left and not picked up and they said even if there was it would be so little it would be gone in a couple of days and I shouldn't worry about it. Hope that helps!

@Bobzybaby thank you! That's helps a lot! Weird how we interpret HPT after MC. Eagerly Waiting for annegative to appear so we can start DTD and yet looking for a slight squinter when TTC and hoping the line is there. Big sigh

@dreaminofholidays My period varies between 23-34 days but is always 14 days after ovulation. Apart from one time which was unexplained!

@YellowDaffodils86 It's definitely one to watch when you're feeling strong enough.

@Russkispy It's a relief to see the negative but also bittersweet. When are you going to start trying again? I'm going to have one period and then hopefully start trying in August.

Last two days signed off work. I'm currently lying on the sofa in my gym clothes trying to psych myself up to go but I feel so anxious. Heart is racing and stomach is going crazy. Haven't been for 6 weeks now. Think I'm mostly anxious about returning to work on Wednesday.

My sister in law just messaged me to say she's sorry for my second loss... first time she's spoken to me in 5 months. She didn't even acknowledge the first miscarriage. I thanked her and said better late than never... too bitchy? 😂

My dog is arriving this afternoon so I hope she will distract me 🐶😊

Morning everyone. There is so much for me to catch up on! I hope everyone has had a good weekend.

AF arrived so I have ordered lots of tests in the hope of conceiving this month.

I hope work on Wednesday is gentle on you @RedRobin7. It took me ages to go back after my first miscarriage and I haven’t been back since I lost my baby this time. I figure I am not ready for work yet and feel less guilty taking my maternity pay and leave than I would sick pay, which is illogical.

Hi ladies
So after my little freak out on Saturday
I looked at my other app- Flo and that told me I wasn't due on until tomorrow (Tuesday!) and then I realised that Fertility friend was saying I was late based on how many days post ovulation it thought I was. So I was freaking out even tho I was only cd26 😂🙈
So silly!
These apps don't know everything and I sure as hell know I am not late at cd26!

This is so not me! 🙄

It's only because I'm supposed to take these medications and Dr S wants me to test at 10dpo that I have started becoming vigilant aka crazy!

Anyway my point is- these apps can be a great tool but ultimately i think we know our bodies more than anyone! Even if after a MC we suddenly feel disconnected from our bodies... we should trust our instincts...

Hope everyone had a lovely weekend.
@Boboelephant Malta looks gorgeous! Have a fab time. I'm so up for the next breathing circle when I get back! Will let you know

@Russkispy I don't know how to PM you! (I use app on my phone...?)

@KnitKitty ooh I like the advice of that YouTube woman! But it will be so hard next BFP not to be anxious! So many mixed emotions!

Anyway-

Hugs to everyone

Happy Monday!

@KnitKitty and @YellowDaffodils86 How are you feeling cycle-twins (triplets?). Anyone else poking their boobs obsessively?

Really like what you said @Knitkitty about just enjoying it from the moment it starts. I spent loads of my last (and first) pregnancy feeling anxious and down because I was convinced it was going to end. Towards the end though I had a bit of an epiphany like this, I decided to tell my parents at 10weeks because I realised that if I didn't, and I did lose the pregnancy, then I would have robbed myself of the joy of telling them I was expecting. All I would have left would be to tell them I'd miscarried. My MMC was discovered at 10weeks 5 but I still don't regret telling them. It was a wonderful moment.
I fully intend on embracing any future pregnancy in a similar way. No more stressing about excuses for not drinking, no more hiding at home expecting the worst.