TTC After Pregnancy Loss Thread 22.

[HidCat]

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A thread for all those who have suffered the loss of a much wanted baby. Affectionately know as the penguin huddle.

We'll start with a roll call as there have been so many new members lately and so many success stories that I think we've all lost track.

HidCat
Age 35
TTC #2
DS 5
MC at 11wks in January
Cycle 3 post MC, trying since August 2017

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Morning, so a little confused... tmi
Lots of ewcm this morning at 6dpo/cd23
Anyone else had this?

@Cleozeta yes I have found them incredibly difficult. I know exactly how you feel. Sending big hugs.
@YellowDaffodils86 I did have that a couple of months ago. Not really sure what it was about but I had it at 7dpo as a one off. Who knows??

Murderino thats a really sad story, nearly made me cry again! Miscarriage is so flipping cruel.

Thank you bobo

@Cleozeta I know - I can be a right emo at times!

On the upside this is the most positive I've felt in months was giggling into my tea last night (after being internally radgie at work mind) adds mood swings to phantom symptoms...

@Murderino glad you're feeling a bit more positive. There are lots of sad moments. When are you testing? When is af due?

Glad you are feeling positive now! I wish I could but by body can't even tolerate alcohol anymore. Another of natures cruel jokes!

Thank you @Boboelephant and @KnitKitty 😘.

I returned to work today and my lovely boss advised me to take the rest of the week off as I cried when I spoke to her. I suppose I'll have these ups and downs for a while!

Good to know I can get straight back to trying though. I know my partner will be relieved lol. I think I'm going to have a couple of months just taking things as they come, and then start tracking if I've not conceived.

Wishing everyone the best of luck!

@Cleozeta my first bfn/af after mc was hard, it was kind of like going through it again, it also felt very final, like concrete evidence you really are not pregnant anymore. Sending hugs.

@Boboelephant af due Monday- I don't test before hand. Just feels like a waste of money. Have a cb digital waiting for the day af is late so next Tuesday hopefully!

Thanks Yellow, yeah highly depressing isn't it. It's good to have people who understand.

Sorry @Cleozeta it really is difficult - I think it's even harder because it just reminds us of going through the pregnancy loss- it's like the universe just saying a big fat nope! Sending you penguin hugs

I am at the RMC - they did an ultrasound and told me I am about to ovulate! I did get a peak static smiley on the cb advanced digital OPK this morning- so it was great to see the follicle about to burst! Goes to show these tests are right on!

I spoke to a consultant and she basically told me that they don't believe in Dr Shehata's methods at all and that he's very controversial.
She told me not to get pregnant for another 10weeks until I get all my results from them! And the only remedy they would probably give me is aspirin or heparin (but given the blood results I have already she thinks I won't need any!) and then she said!! That I probably just had bad luck 3 times! 🙄🙄🙄

So erm I'm not waiting for any of their results... even tho Dr Shehata is crazy expensive and his treatment is intense, I feel like I have already invested in his methods and he has amazing results so I'm just going to suck it up.

Tomorrow I will begin the steroids ! I have no idea how Roid Zarala is going to be! I'm a bit scared. I might have change my name to Zaralaroid if I become monstrous

Question: - if I get peak today- ovulate tomorrow, when is 1dpo, after tomorrow??

Sorry for long ramble!
Hope you guys all have a good day and penguin hugs to those who need it!

Thanks zarala

The last ultrasound I went to, I had a follicle about to bust too, I was there to see how much retained products were left to remove that afternoon. Turned out they had reabsorbed and ovulation was about to happen. Result!

Good luck with your treatment, sounds interesting!

@Cleozeta that sounds reassuring! Sounds really interesting too! On my last scan I saw my ovaries, was very strange yet fascinating!

@zarala That's very interesting! I'm confused about ovulation though... if I get ovulation pain could that be the follicle bursting? My pain is always on the same day as the static smiley so I think I ovulate that day rather than the next day. It's so confusing 🙈

I wouldn't want to wait 10 weeks for their results either!

@Cleozeta I agree, it's so hard. It's just as hard as seeing a positive when you know you've miscarried. It's so unfair we have to go through this.

@redhead82 Hi and welcome! I'm so sorry for your loss. Returning to work is such a horrible feeling after a MC. I'm glad your boss was nice to you. I'm still having ups and downs 3 months on - so be kind to yourself.

@Murderino I'm testing next Tuesday morning but that's going to be two days early for me. Might not be the best idea as I then have to travel to wales with two colleagues so if it's negative I'll be grumpy but it could also be a good distraction!

@KnitKitty Good idea to take a test, it will definitely help you. It won't be nice to see a negative but as you say, it should enable you to relax.

@YellowDaffodils86 It's hard! I felt a bit weird yesterday and was trying not to google as I know it's far too early to feel anything yet. Hurry up next week!!

@zarala peak today means ovulation tomorrow (probably) which means Thursday you'll be 1dpo
10 weeks?! Is she crazy! That's about three cycles you'll be missing. You gonna not try for that long? Also how did you not slap her when she said that you probably had 'bad luck'? I'd be fuming!

Ugh. Was starting to feel really positive and properly myself again, then checked Facebook. Old school friend, same age as me posted a 13 week scan pic. I'm happy for her, but I feel winded, and so sad. Crazy really-when I see scan pics or BFP announcements on here it doesn't affect me like this-those make me smile and give me hope....but seeing that one today, old mate, same hospital I was scanned at over bean...I dunno why it just hurts. Stupid really.

@RedRobin7 I know it's so weird because I had definite ovulation pains yesterday! But apparently it hasn't happened yet! I mean I saw it hasn't!
Thanks! That's really helpful @DaisyMay25 but 10 weeks! I know right?! Plus I have been on TTC hiatus since March (since my last MMC) I feel like I've waited long enough! Had 3 cycles and I'm now ready to go!
I had done a lot of reading about this RMC and I kind of expected this response- so I was prepared for that! And she said it in the nicest possible way...

Anyway- OH and I have JKS all week, and we're into deep to hold off now! Going to JKS for next 2-3 days. Start the steroids tomorrow and then test 10dpo- (as per dr Shehata's requirements) that's Saturday 23rd! I have never tested so early before!
Ah ! This is a whole new world for me

@Laney79 I know what you mean. A girl I used to work with is in full tmi baby spam mode about her pregnancy on fb - I think even if I wasn't ttc i'd find it annoying "baby is making me eat this" or "even just watching telly is awesome now with my little one moving" or "does anyone know where I can do pregnancy yoga" although I find people who use fb as a google substitute irritating anyway...

I know I sound like a cow... 🐄

@Boboelephant you still cramping? I'm getting twinges today rather than cramps. No more spotting/Brown cm though.

@zarala How strange! Although this could be good news for me. We didn't DTD on the day I felt the pain but we did the day after in the evening so maybe we caught it in time. Not going to get my hopes up though.. expecting a BFN this month! Fingers crossed for you 😊 JKS!

Urgh can't stand Facebook these days for this very reason @murderino. I've not been on it since the start of my mc when I was confronted with a twins birth announcement that sent me over the edge! Feel so much happier & don't miss it at all.

I'm feeling some twinges, not cramps exactly, but something is going on down there. I'm 11dpo now so really hoping it's not af getting ready to pounce but my optimism is starting to fade :(

@sweetpea0318 keep the faith- gotta happen at some point why not now?!

Is this a positive? Or an almost? Gaahh wish I wasn’t too broke to buy a digital 😭

Ladies can you clear this up for me: Clearblue digital opk - are you supposed to use it with fmu?

@Murderino thats so annoying, i would also find that highly irritating!
Your brown cm/spotting sounds very promising!

@KeefBurtain looks almost there!

Had some weird stabby pains, like little electric zaps in uterus today, along with ewcm. Tried to convince myself earlier thats its nothing and to ignore it and no testing until next week!