SQUARE ONE'RS TO GRADUATES! Morale & energy is low, but we will not be beaten, BFPs WILL be achieved in this here thread!

[Tee4me]

Roll call:

Tee4me: 34 years old
TTC: #2 since December 2015
DC: DS nearly 5 years old
x2 early MCs
Diagnosed with high level of activated NK cells with positive result for Antinuclear Antibodies plus Hypothyroidism.
About to embark on 1st cycle with medication (from ovulation).
CD7 and gearing up for FW!

Welcoming original square-oner's and any newbies battling along and in need some support x

[Jamon]

Wow so so close to my in laws. Okay we are going to have a bottle of wine next time we're up. Will have to ask DH to excuse me!

[Jamon]

Thanks tee you're so sweet xx

[Footy1]

Thinking of you all. Think my relationship problems got worse ttc.
It's such a let down each month. I definitely think my moods were effected with Dh playing up.
I'm currently on day 60 of cycle. Not a cramp or bfp in sight.
Started the Af pills again to bring it on as don't want to be on holiday in couple of weeks time with a heavy period.
I too been seeing counsellor on my own and as a couple. Not really for ttc, but marital problems. Although he has expressed he'd love another child. I do too. Was kinda hoping I would accidentally fall recently but took a test yesterday and nothing.

I have family near Leeds too so I might join the pity party drinks too 😬

Keep going ladies xx

[Footy1]

Oh and I love marmite! I even use it in shepherds pie, casseroles and gravy!
Always good to try new things.

This week I'm on a new regime of extra strength vitamin B, Angus castus, folic acid and zinc.

[physicskate]

Cheers for the support all. Tee I would take that deal in a heartbeat.

Please do let me know if any of you head North at all! Will do the same if I head south...

I'm not really doing WW anymore, but got my bmi down to 23.8 and lost over a stone. I'm keeping it off and eating more veg... I started 30 day yoga with adriene - a few days in.. so I should be feeling great about myself but I don't.

I took an opk and it was negative, so it makes me feel better that we might have a bit of time to dtd. I guess things aren't going my way so I want to give up and run away. My flight response it pretty developed... coupled with DH working and me being on summer holidays our empathy for each other starts to run thin about this time of year...

[Footy1]

Hope you are feeling ok kate. Thinking of you all too.

Anyone been constipated on the extra b vitamins?

[Mimilicious013]

Sending massive hugs and cake your way ladies. Hope you are feeling better now @kate and @jam.

It's so true that ttc strains the relationship. I remember end of last year when dh was behaving selfishly and I had had just about enough. I really hope you all look for things to be grateful for each day like jam once said and I am quite certain that you will all eventually get what you want.

Have a great weekend 🌻
xoxo

[Tee4me]

How are you feeling Mimi? 4 days to go!! x

[Mimilicious013]

I'm OK @tee, only needing naps ever so often. I'm enjoying them though lol . counting down indeed, I am so excited. Do you still plan on poas Tuesday? Have everything crossed for you. Are you feeling any symptoms yet?

[Tee4me]

Ah glad to hear it, hope DH is encouraging you to take it easy!
Yes poas Tuesday. No symptoms but don't think I'd ever expect anything at this stage anyway (only 8dpo). I would never test early ordinarily, let alone at 10dpo, but you're not supposed to continue the steroids beyond that if unsuccessful.
Went to see my GP on Friday, and she didn't hesitate to prescribe me the Thyroxine because of my TSH level. Interestingly she said she'd seen several woman recently with subclinical Hypothyroidism and struggling to conceive!! So frustrating that they didn't spot this when my bloods were tested last year?! My level was the same back then!!
Jam/Footy, thinking of you ladies in particular, I strongly recommend you review your test results from last year too. If your TSH is between 2.5 - 5 then it will be worth a conversation with your GP. Mine was 4.3 and within the 'normal' range (

[physicskate]

Mine was 2.3 when last checked in Nov. My gp said it's a 'non-starter'. I wish they'd give me low dose thyroxine, but they won't :(. Between 1-2 is best for ttc.

As we all know, my gp is shite!!

[Footy1]

I just checked mine from over a year ago of test results I kept the printed sheet. It was 1. My problem is ovulation. I used to be so regular! It's so frustrating.

I'm hoping the combo of vit pills will work, stress has eased a bit otherwise I may have to go back on the clomid route 😔

[Tee4me]

That's great your TSH is in good range. Shame ovulation is still unpredictable. Would you ever consider the next level up from Clomid? Some ladies at the clinic I'm at with the Specialist talk about a 'Super Ovulation' initiative. it may involve injections, but if I remember rightly, even the Clomid wasn't necessarily doing the job for you in the past? Is there a Consultant you can go back to and investigate next steps?
Glad stress has eased and hope things are getting back on track with DH and you are both being supported.

[physicskate]

I'm pretty sure I'm 1 dpo. Going to carry on with Dtd every other day for a bit though.

Had a bit of a FaceTime heart to heart with my sister. Took her about 5 months, but interestingly she didn't ov until way late in the cycle she conceived - 5 days before af due! Maybe an anomaly maybe not as it was her first cycle of opks.

Feeling resigned at the moment... next counselling session tomorrow.

How is counselling going foot??

I really hope your new protocol helps tee!! Not to get excited or hopes up or anything...

Jam I hope you're ok and keeping busy. Not long until a rollercoaster starts.

Hello all the grads!!

[Tee4me]

BFN 👎🏻 Onwards we go.

Interesting about your sister's late ovulation Kate. I know my twin fell pregnant from DTD once on CD18. Must make an effort to keep up DTD far beyond suspected ovulation.

[Mimilicious013]

Sorry @tee, sending you massive hugs and .onwards indeed! !!
I cried for a good 20 min last night after reading through our last year's thread. This ttc is so emotional and we all have been through trying times. Honestly can't wait until everyone finally gets their bfps.

Hope you managed to do some more conga @kate.how are you doing now?

Glad you are less stressed @foot.hope you and the boys are doing well incl the bigger boy .

Hie @jam, hopeyou are feeling better and are getting excited for your next step soon.

[physicskate]

Oh tee that's rough. I can't believe they say 10 dpo cause so many tests won't detect that early. Frer will detect something like 70% of pregnancies that early, which is too low for me to waste one...

Yup it is a rollercoaster mimi. I don't like rollercoasters. I want off!!

We've Dtd every other day since cd 10? It's now cd 22? And I think I'm 2 dpo. Going to do one more I think in two days. I think dh is pretty worn out. Damn my long cycles!!!!!

[physicskate]

Had another counselling session this afternoon. I feel a bit better but exhausted.

Have come to the conclusion that I'm feeling so mental because I am used to nearly constant upheaval - my parents always travelled so didn't have routine, then my mums alcoholism, then moving to a new country Yada yada Yada... so I'm not dealing well with stasis once I've made a decision to change my life.

But just throw into the mix I think I've got bacterial vaginosis!!!! Argh!! Gonna try one of those otc test things and treatment. Ugh.

[Jamon]

Hope that clears up soon Kate, last thing your foof needs. Counselling sounds great. I need this!

Sorry about the BFN tee ☹️ hope you've bounced back x

[Tee4me]

Oh Kate bless you! You really deserve a break, really hope this is your month. Sounds like you've done well on the DTD front, really hope you can chill in the 2ww x

[physicskate]

Just checking in... 6 dpo. I think I managed to rid of the bv with tea tree oil!! Whoop!

Jam how did your appt go?? I'd definitely take any offers of counselling. I had a minor break-through at my last one, which helped a little. Trying to stay away from 'why haven't I fallen pregnant when he sneezed' types...

I realised that I've always been working towards something, my life is perpetual change! I'm not ok with stasis. But stasis is ok. 18 months isn't actually that long (even for me) and it's irrelevant how long anyone else took. I have to be ok. I probably can't explain it well, but it made sense...

[Tee4me]

Hi Kate, glad you're well into the 2ww at last! Always good to treat with natural remedies. I swear by tea tree for my spots!!
I can understand this state of limbo would be doing your head in by now! I find it horrendous, and I'm a very homely person who likes routine (predictable routines) and generally doesn't do well with change, so for a mover and shaker this must be hell!
CD1 here. For once AF was very welcomed, having had the BFNs, glad to get cracking on with a new cycle. Had debilitating indigestion today. Spent most of it in bed, who knew indigestion could be so awful!! Dug out my medication sheet from the Specialist and found it's on the list as a side effect for the steroid I started taking. Must avoid curries and fatty food for now. At this moment in time, I feel like I never want to eat again!!
How's the rest of the gang?
Mimi did you have your scan?! x

[Nimisha]

Hi all,
I'm glad counselling seems to be helping Kate, I had some years ago when I had depression, it helped but I think the thing that really made a difference was antidepressants. I put off taking them for one reason and another but once I did it helped give me the motivation to get up in the morning.

Sorry about your indigestion Tee, I get bad indigestion too, I would be taking aspirin from the mc point of view but I know that would make my stomach worse.

I'm back from holiday, lovely being away but had a bleed on my last day and loads of stomach cramps today. 6 weeks and 3 days today. I will get round to calling epu but they won't scan me before 8 weeks. A little glum today, I really don't want another miscarriage.

[Tee4me]

Oh gosh Nim I'm sorry for your uncertainty. I'm on another thread with women who are on the same medication to prevent miscarriage/with the same Specialist. A couple of the ladies who had recent BFPs had bleeds and/or cramps and went on to have scans that showed healthy babies. What sort of bleed was it?
Could you go to a private clinic for a scan just to put your mind at ease? My Consultant scans at 6, 8, 10 and 12 weeks.
I hope you can take it easy in the meantime x

[physicskate]

Oh Nim!! I am sending as many positive thoughts your way as possible... I do hope you're being kind to yourself.

The depression hits in waves - I'll be ok-ish for a few days and then pretty bad for a couple weeks when af hits... actually I think I a best between 2-8 dpo!

Dreading when work kicks in. Just haven't felt enough motivation to plan for the new courses I'm teaching next year. I know this is just going to add to the stress, but that's in the future...