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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

TTC after miscarriage- March 2007

698 replies

duchesse · 12/03/2007 20:13

Sorry, guys, can't leave a redirect at the old one- it's not accepting new messages. I hope nobody's already set a new one up...

OP posts:
Catbabymummy · 16/03/2007 13:48

I was debating the early scan too. I m/c at 9 weeks. I wonder if I had an early scan and it showed baby was ok, would that lull me into a false sense of security? I just don't know.
I don't know! However, Mumpbump's stats were very useful.
Mrs Mc, I presume dpo stands for days post ovulation? In whcih case I think I'm 14 dpo, so the odds of me getting a bfp are 80%. Actually that's pretty reassuring. I'll wait until Sunday and re test, assuming AF don't start. Still no warning bells, ususally get dull lower back ache day before, but nothing.

MrsMcJnr · 16/03/2007 14:34

Wheelybug - I know what you mean, I think the most stressful thing was waiting to see a HB between scans. That said, I thought I was 8 weeks at the first one but the baby was only 6! So glad the Dr was fab and that you feel like a weight has been lifted, that?s excellent. Feeling like you are doing something really helps if you ask me!

Catbabymummy ? sorry yes it does mean days after ovulation. Glad you found that reassuring I always have too. So hopeful for you

becklespeckle · 16/03/2007 14:57

Hi, can I join you? Am ttc no 3 at the mo, brief history:
1st pg MMC at 15 weeks (baby stopped growing at 12 weeks) - D&C
2nd pg DS1 (June 2000)
3rd pg DS2 (Jan 2003)
4th pg MMC at 11 weeks (scan in early August showed baby stopped growing at 5 weeks) chose no D&C as it seemed to be happening by itself, still had +tive tests in Sept so had to have D&C in Oct to finish it (although due to a slip there is a possibility I fell pg and m/c'd again)
AF came 3 months after 1st m/c but then I was regular (for the first time ever!) afterwards and conceived DS1 on 3rd cycle! DS2 took 18 months.
Since 2nd m/c have had terrible cycle, AF came in Nov for 2 weeks and Jan for 3.
Currently on CD67 - have been doing a test once a week or so for the last couple of weeks as if I get pg would like to know roughly where I am (although is soul-destroying to keep getting negs). Was 10 weeks before I knew I was having DS2!
If I fall again I will def be asking for a scan at 7-8 weeks and again at 12-13 weeks.
Sorry - that wasn't particularly brief was it

becklespeckle · 16/03/2007 14:58

glad you went to the docs tho Wheelybug - remember talking to you on another thread - is good you saw a helpful one too!

MrsMcJnr · 16/03/2007 15:04

Hello Becklespeckle nice to meet you again. Sorry to hear that you have had such a hard time. The whole process can be so time consuming can?t it? Even if I am lucky enough to fall this month, the baby will be due in December when I last conceived so I will effectively been pregnant for a year and that is very best case scenario!

becklespeckle · 16/03/2007 15:39

Hi MrsMcJnr, yes it is very time consuming! Milestones are hard too - after first mc I was pg again by babe's due date which did ease the hurt a bit. This time due date has been and gone and I feel no closer.
Did you take long ttc? For me a m/c leaves a baby-shaped gap and TBH I feel like I am just treading water at the moment waiting for it to be filled.
I read your poem you wrote for your little one - I thought it was lovely and it made me cry.

MrsMcJnr · 16/03/2007 15:54

Hello I can imagine the milestones are the worst, I really hope I am pregnant again by my due date, especially as a friend is due the week before. We were trying for 8 cycles before we got pregnant this time round, it felt like years. I hope it doesn?t take as long again. I know what you mean about the baby-shaped gap waiting to be filled, I feel exactly the same. I?m glad you liked Ava?s poem, I did feel better having written it for her (I don?t know it was a girl but I just felt she was).

becklespeckle · 16/03/2007 16:09

It is hard when friends are due at the same time as you were, one of my BF was due a month before me, we started trying around the same time. She now has a beautiful boy (her 3rd too), I didn't find it hard that she was still pg and was as excited as her when she had him. What was hardest was the people congratulating her when I knew it should have been me too - and the fact that everyone seemed to forget that it should have been me too, even her.
I have been in the other position too where I was pg and a friend due at the same time m/c and it is a far more difficult position - I felt v guilty for being pg when they weren't any more.
As far as feelings go about sex of baby, I had a feeling with both my DSs that they were boys right from the start! I didn't have a clue with the 2 I lost so perhaps that was always a sign tho, they too had names ready for them which I don't think I could bring myself to use again.

MrsMcJnr · 16/03/2007 16:16

I know what you mean, Ava is reserved for our lost baby

becklespeckle · 16/03/2007 16:31

it's a lovely name - we had Anna or Alfie

wheelybug · 16/03/2007 19:15

Hi Beckle - nice to 'see' you again even in such circumstances.

Ava is a beautiful name MrsMcJ (as is Anna btw Beckle - I have an Anna).

Agree about the 'treading water' - I kind of feel our life is on hold until we manage to produce another baby which is a feeling I hate as we should be enjoying what we have for now but I guess its only natural to feel this way.

Hurrah - its the weekend !! Although we're decorating dd's bedroom all weekend. What fun.

becklespeckle · 16/03/2007 22:00

IKWYM Wheely, I am very grateful for the 2 I have and sometimes feel selfish for wanting another.

wheelybug · 16/03/2007 23:14

Beckle - I don't think it matters how many you have, if you want one/another one you still have that missing bit. Its not selfish.

kensgirl · 16/03/2007 23:46

I'm not sure how feeling on the early scan ,last time I was scanned at 8.5 and 10.5 weeks, the first showing a hb and the second no hb they managed to be both the most wondeful , and the worst moments of my life.

I know that (hopefully) next time, I won't have a choice due to my history, and that scans will begin at 7 weeks ish. Not sure if it is reassuring or potentially terifying, so i'll just wait and see. Just wish everything was hapy go lucky!!

Catbabymummy · 17/03/2007 06:45

Had a rotten day and night, slight discharge which frightened me that I was getting my period, but no. Woke up feeling sick again still have migraine. And if that was all, got really upset because I made the mistake of posting on AIBU regarding being a SM and got slagged off.

peanutbutter · 17/03/2007 08:18

hello everyone, i'm not sure i'm up to putting a proper post on here today, but just to ask if I can join your thread.

I've been on the ttc threads for a few months, then a short time on the Due in November ante-natal but i started miscarrying yesterday.

i'm so relieved to see this thread.

yawningmonster · 17/03/2007 08:27

Hi there, can I hang out here for a bit?. Not really sure I am ready to ttc again just yet but would definately like to try again at some point when we are feeling a bit stronger as a family. But would like to hang out with others who have been through similar things to us and just see how it is all going and hopefully hear some positive outcomes to give us strength and hope that things will work out for us at some point too.

wheelybug · 17/03/2007 08:43

Sorry you're here to join us Yawningmonster and Peanutbutter (and we were all so excited about your BFP). Please try and stay strong and keep posting even if you're not yet ready to ttc. We've all been there unforetunately.

What's a SM Catbaby ? Will go and find thread - sorry you're having a rough time... and where is your AF/BFP ??

right really must go and start decorating.

wheelybug · 17/03/2007 08:54

catbaby - just skimmed the thread. I find there are always some threads that just set people off and there'll be a small part they'll pick up on which will be a sensitive issue for them and then run adn run with it. If I were you (but feel free to ignore) I would just take note of the practical suggestions some people have made re where to get the bath bombs etc and let the convo slip away.

I remember one of my postnatal thread starting a thread about being annoyed with her dh for forgetting to give her ds lunch for about an hour (at a time when he was mostly milk fed) and everyone piled in saying it was child abuse and she should leave him immediately.

Catbabymummy · 17/03/2007 09:02

Thanks, maybe I've just been overly sensitive, feeling really down atm becuase of horrible migraine and stressing over the whole am i or am i not pregnant.
I'll just ignore it. Everyone's entitled to their opinions after all!
Still no sign of AF and feeling sick again.

kensgirl · 17/03/2007 10:15

Hello..

I'm feeling a bit low today, my sil had a baby boy last night, and though I really am thrilled for her, I'm realy hurting that its not me too. I just can't get that I should be 25 weeks tomorrow out of my head, and keep seeing both of the scans in my mind, remembering everything.

It doesn't help eiher that my dh is away n Edinburgh and so I'm sat here all on my lonesome feeling like a crap failure as a mum.

Really hope I'm pregnant by my due date - 1st July.

Sorry for chewing your ears.

cazzybabs · 17/03/2007 10:18

kensgirl - I am like that. My friend is pregnant at work and I avoid talking to her.

Anyway lets both try and get pregagnt by July (I was due then too)..

cazzybabs · 17/03/2007 10:22

peanutbutter . Are you doing OK (a bit of a stupid question)? I am thinking of you and your dp and your baby.

Uki · 17/03/2007 10:26

Hi yawningmonster and peanutbutter, you will find lots of support here, and positive stories too.

Cat- just read that thread, full on. There's been some awful jumpy threads lately, I've never really seen this as much of late in 3.5 years. I posted on one the other day "What's wrong with you all" couldn't help myself. i think women in particular are under alot of stress, post feminist life is not easy.
i liked the reciepe on there though!!!

Uki · 17/03/2007 10:29

Kengirl, sorry you feel low, I know the feeling of wishing it was you, but it will be soon.
On the positive side-It's probably an old wives tale but being around newborns is meant to make you fertile.