40+ ttc: bring on the bfp's!

[ababsurdum]

Continuation of the long-running 40+ ttc thread.

Link to the previous thread.

Hello ladies msy I also join? I'm 41 and have been ttc #2 for 8 months now with nothing to show for it, except (maybe) a chemical pregnancy last month. I'm saying maybe because I think I saw a faint line on a pregnancy test and when AF arrived it was unusually heavy with clots which I don't normally get. I've been on prenat vit for months and just finishing 2nd month of ubiquinol and acupuncture. I'm also doing blood tests this month so we'll see what the results say. I keep telling myself my grandmother got pregnant with her last baby at 44 (unplanned) so there is still hope but each month I get disappointed when AF comes. Hopefully we will all get our BFP soon.

Welcome Coastal and Orchid. Good to have some more ‘geriatrics’ on board;) sorry for both your losses. A MMC is particularly hard. I had one a few years ago and know how awful it is to be told the worst at a scan. It’s all in your favour tho. Yes we are all on ubiquinol and acupuncture round these parts!

Polly sorry to hear of imminent AF. Hope you’re ok hun.

Nothing to report here. Only dtd once this cycle around ovulation so am not really considering myself to be in the 2ww. Intend to enjoy Xmas.

Hi all. Just popping in to say hello as I've been inactive on the page for a while, mainly as there's nothing to report. Only positive I have is that the holidays are nearly here which coincide with yet another FW. Hope you are all ok and keeping the hope alive. Here's to a fruitful 2018 for all!

Hi all, nothing to report here either. We missed the last fertile week so it's been a long month. Next week is FW so 2WW wait will be over new year. I take Ubquinol too I've read good things about it.

The good thing about this is I've been able to enjoy the festivities a bit more and have a drink 😊 looking forward to doing the same over Christmas

@cleozeta - thank you. It is good to know that people are still popping them out later on!

@littlemimosa - thank you. Yes, I think a MMC is really tough. My body still thought it was pregnant for 4 weeks and I was having awful morning sickness without the prize at the end!

CD3 for me today and horrendous period pains. Thinking of going home but had over 2 weeks off after MMC so feel I can't. Have acupuncture tomorrow lunchtime.

Got 1.5 days holiday to take this year. Can't decide whether to take it this week and have longer off for Xmas or carry it over to next year. Alternatively could take 2 Jan off to relax after all the BD as our FW starts around 28th. Hard as kind of hoping I'll be off for some of next year after a birth (so then wouldn't need as much holiday for rest of year) but know that may not happen

Well I suspect I’m not even going to be able to start trying for a while since no sign of a proper AF since stopping the pill yet. But then I knew it might take a few months for my cycle to come back so just taking the pre Natals just in case and enjoying Dtd whenever I want without an interruption for now ;)

It’s frustrating and worrying waiting for my cycle to establish again so just crossing fingers that i it will still be possible to conceive when it does and hoping it doesn’t take too long!!

Littlemimosa-thank you!

Coastalchick-very sorry about your MMC. Same thing happened to my friend in Oct. Now I'm no expert and of course there are various reasons for why things happen but when I had an early MC in 2014, my ob-gyn back home gave me progesterone and told me to start taking it once I got a BFP in case my levels were low during the pregnancy. From what I've heard it's not a common practice in the UK but perhaps worth looking into. I know for a fact something as simple as that can make a big difference. Obviously most women have healthy pregnancies without taking anything but I thought I'd mention it in case it could help next time. I know I will start taking it again once I get a BFP.

Ov question: is it possible to have peak fertility on cb ov sticks every month without actually ovulating?

@orchid222 - thank you. Yes, I've heard the same re progesterone and am going to push for it if lucky enough to get a BFP again.

Answer to your question - yes you can get peak smileys and still not ovulate. The OPK's only show the surge, not actual ovulation. I think the only way to know for sure is a blood test. It's called the 21 day progesterone test. I requested it from my GP so will have that in Jan to check as I'm convinced I'm not bloody ovulation post MC!

Yeah I got an lh surge last month but have currently low progesterone (just came off the pill so not unexpected) so not back fully functioning and ovulating yet :(. In that horrid please let everything get back to normal quickly phase!

Thank you, that's what I thought. I have the 21 blood tests scheduled for next Wed so will find out about my progesterone soon but if I had a chemical last month I must've ovulated.

Can you please let me know what you think? I'm not temping and my EWCM is non-existent so unfortunately I'm relying on cb ov sticks to help me figure out the surge/ov. I've had an empty circle every day including this morning but since I'm now on cd16 I tested in the evening and got a peak. What's frustrating is that normally it stays on for 48 hrs or something like that this time it disappeared the moment I took the stick out. I went for acupuncture and when I came back I thought I'd see if the reader still works since the smiley didn't stay on and I got an empty circle. Frustrating! Do you think I should assume the peak I got earlier was it and now the reader is confused or should I keep testing? I never had peak later than cd16. Confusing...

There's a thread running at the moment about a lady who has just found out she pregnant at 49!
There's hope ladies!!!!

Yeah I saw that - amazing!!!! Does make me think perhaps I ought to chill out a bit (well, I say that only because this time next week will be FW, I wasn't saying that when AF arrived a few days ago!)

What is the thread called?

F...ity f..k f..k is 49 too old for a child?
(Thats the thread name!)

Just had a quick read how lovely

Yes lovely and it was nice to read many of the other positive stories

Hello, I'm just popping back to say firstly what a huge support this thread was when I was ttc. And secondly share a little of what helped in the end to any new people. It may or may not have worked- who knows! I recognise many names too, some from The ttc mc thread. Currently 20 weeks, we had our scan yesterday and all seems very well with our little boy. I don't think the anxiety will fade till he's about four though!

I read it starts with the egg and followed the advice regarding a little extra folate plus my prenatal tablet (I halved or quartered a 1000 tablet) and made sure Dh was also taking it too. I started ubiquinol after my first mc. Quite expensive but I reasoned it wasn't ivf. I took 2-3 a day and Dh also took it. It's actually only been shown to be effective in humans in men - as a trial for women is hard to set up; few would want to take the placebo. It's been shown to be effective in female mice though. He also took a prenatal (we went all out!)

My second mc actually was probably because I ovulated stupidly early so I doubt it was a decent egg. It was a very early mc too.

I also took Eve primrose till ovulation. My ewcm definitely improved greatly. I think staying well hydrated helped too!

My Dh is incredibly sociable and works in a profession with lots of awards and accolades - there were quite a few this year plus several of his friends turned 40. I honestly think, as the book says, we didn't conceive till he'd calmed down on that front for a good few weeks. I'm not really a drinker so that wasn't an issue.

I read on this thread that many of the pregnant at over 40 ladies found a little extra exercise helped (i do know too much hinders). Also, there's a post upthread I've bookmarked which I'll copy here again in case it helps.

I used cheap ov sticks but I would poas 2-3 times a day as sometimes the surge was in the eve. I completely missed the surge when I conceived my first son; simply dtd every other day from cd 8 worked that time! I tend to ovulate on day 10, 11 or 12. The extra ewcm did really help me though.

Anyway, just my 2 pennoth worth.

Sending many positive vibes- I know how frustrating it can be. I used to do a lot of yoga and I did wish I could have been yoga ing when I was ttc (times weren't possible with work and family! )

Post upthread from mackonadragos** in feb:

I too read into the pregnancy thread, thanks to Clara. And what caught my eye was

"DH had been ejaculating twice a week at least in the 2 months prior to getting pg, as this was required for the sperm test. Apparently that clears out the old sperm (which can deteriorate in situ) and means you have the optimum turnover of new swimmers. Fertility consultant was most insistent on this! "

My very first PG, when I was 33, ended in MC, and at that time we were very inactive, so only got together for the baby, fell PG first cycle. So ever since my husband needs to exercise in one way or the other, no old sperms can enter into my -temple- body. So in my experience, it is good not to focus solely on the ovu window, but have a bit of work before too.

Finally, I also read in the latest papers, I found on the net, that unless someone suffers from low sperm count, the best practice is to have sex every singe day, and not in every 2-3 days as it is normally recommended. This gives the highest number of pregnancies, the volume of sperms slightly decreases, but they will have a better quality. I think the 2-3 days only advised because in reality by the time OV happens couples get far too tired. Nevertheless, it worth trying if you have the energy for such endless fun.

Thanks for the super tips Ekphrasis, and congrats on getting so far, that's amazing :-)

I've had another weird/annoying one this month, for the past few months I have ovulated on days 20 & 21, so this month did not bother doing opk until yesterday (cd12) as did not see much point. Got a faint line on a cheapy, then overnight and this morning have come down with the most horendous stomach bug so been mostly bed bound. Felt so ill was unable to do cbam or temp first thing. Just felt well enough to muster energy to do cheap opk now and it's bloody positive! We have not dtd at all yet this month as thought it was too soon, do we need to try and dtd tonight with me ill? Now worries we'll completely miss window. Its only cd13!

Also getting what seems to be ov pain on both sides, and a bit of brown spotting. Thats a bit weird isnt it? No ewcm as dehydrated

Wow just read that thread about all those over 45 pregnancies. Very encouraging.

Ekphrasis - thanks for the tips and hints. Always grateful to hear any of those. And congratulations on your pregnancy btw. How old are you?

Cleo - sorry to hear you're sick. It could be the illlness throwing things off maybe? Doesn't take much to do that here. Stress, illness etc.

Can I pick your collective brains please: came off the pill on around the 20.11.17. Got an LH surge round 4.12.17. Pretty sure that I didn’t ovulate then though and it was just a surge as bloods at 3 weeks read I still had low progesterone from coming off the pill.

So question is: am I likely to ovulate ‘at some point’ then get AF or just get an AF at some point? Kind of wrote ttc off until I see a proper AF but starting to get that can’t keep my hands off him feeling again.

Welcome coastalchick and karrigan. Coastalchick, I know of lots of people who have had miscarriages then gone on to have healthy babies.
Thanks littlemimosa. It indeed came and I was really disappointed! I've now booked in for acupuncture (managed to do a barter - swapping her pilates lessons for acu) and I've also self diagnosed thin uterine lining as my periods are only a day or 2 - probably not great. So I'm additionally supplementing with vitamin e and drinking pomegranate juice, as well as the ubiquinol, vt d, b complex, maca, evening primrose oil and fish oils. It's ridiculous how many pills I take (and expensive)!

Re the OPK/ovulation question, I think your temperature also tells you. It should drop the day before ovulation and jump the day after. Not great for predicting but that plus the OPKs and you can be confident you have ovulated - that's my understanding anyway, but happy to be told I am wrong!

Congratulations Ekphrasis. That's lovely news. And good tips! My DP has just had great results on his sperm test so am not sure I'll get him to reduce his drinking or take supps now. Do you still think it's worth it?

Orchid222, I don't have any EWCM anymore either really, so I've been using OPKs then preseed, plus taking evening primrose oil. I think the pre seed could be a good option though as mimics the EWCM. I just had a scan this am and all looks fine with my uterus and ovaries, so I am sure it's just my egg quality/quantity at 42.

Wishing everyone on the thread merry christmas and a BFP in 2018.