40+ ttc: bring on the bfp's!

[ababsurdum]

Continuation of the long-running 40+ ttc thread.

Link to the previous thread.

Thanks for the personal details ladies! We definitely don’t dtd enough. We’re both flippin tired with two LOs and work! Sigh.

Thought I would report back on the Soy Isoflavones.

I had my usual spotting but slightly earlier at 9dpo. On Monday (12dpo), I went for a run in the sleet and noticed my right hip was sore afterwards. This is something I suffer with in pregnancy. I also felt feverish and my nose felt really blocked (with big bogies, not snot - sorry for tmi). Tuesday I just felt really odd, hot and shivery, didn't want chocolate (unusual) and smelt someone's breath on the train. Yesterday, same, I felt like I had a glow or that my body was electrically charged. I'm convinced it was the pregnancy hormone.

However, at 5pm yesterday I noticed a load of brown discharge and then AF started straight away. I never come on at this time, I always start AF in the morning.

I am not a tester as I know when I know (I've been pg 4 times excluding chemical pregnancies). I wish I'd tested now so at least I would be sure but I'm pretty sure this was a chemical pregnancy. And can only assume it was down to the Soy Isoflavones so I'll be taking them again this cycle but starting at cd4 instead of cd3.

And just to add that I've been ttc for 18 months and not felt the pg hormone like I did this week during that whole 18 months.

Gosh that’s interesting Ali. I’m sorry AF arrived tho. I’m tempted by the soy but pretty sure I’m ovulating every month so would it help? Day 11 today and just ovulated. Having a month off for various reasons though. Bit sad but at least I can drink over Xmas!

Got another question for everyone. When you ovulate how do you feel emotionally? Until the last six months I’d always feel really horny around ov but lately I feel horrendous. Like crying, depressed, angry. It’s absolutely awful. It literally comes on with the LH surge and ewcm and lasts about 24 hours. Afterwards I feel drained. Anyone else?

Yes I’m a regular ovulater too but it’s supposed to make the egg more mature and improve ovulation. After 18 months I felt I had to try something!

Sometimes I feel anxious around the LH surge. And the cramps make it worse.

Hope you have a nice month off and come back next cycle raring to go!

Now what do I count as cd1 if AF started at 6pm?

Hi Ali, I think you count cd1 as tomorrow. Sorry to hear re this chemical.

Ali depends if it’s full flow or not. If it’s just spotting count first day of full flow as cd1. If it’s full flow right from the start then count that day as cd1. That’s how I’ve always done it.

Ended up dtd today (for fun rather than ttc) and now I’m wondering if yesterday or Wednesday was LH surge that i might be in with a (slim) chance after all. I did an ov test earlier today (even tho I thought I’d missed it) and the line was v dark, almost positive. Who knows!

Sounds promising Mimosa! You must have caught the surge.

Full flow AF started around 6pm so should I count that as cd1? Just working out when to start the soy.

If it was full flow I would count that as cd1 for soy

I think I would count it as day 1 too.

How’s everyone else? Quiet on here.

Just finished a round of soy, so waiting to ov now. Probably another week yet if cycle goes as previous soy cycles, so just keeping busy.

How are you getting on?

Sorry to hear about about chemical ali. It's a long old journey this trying to conceive.
So does soy improve egg quality? Bit like ubiquinol? I'm actually 2 days late but also flew back from new york on tuesday so wondering if maybe jetlag related. I also feel crap and nauseous, but I've felt like this for over a month, so think it's a bug that won't shift. My temps are still high though so if nothing tomorrow I'll do a test. I've been ttc for a year now, but this month was the first month I used opk's and temped, plus I used pre-seed, so I do know I ovulated and that we dtd at the right time with the pre-seed - and it was later than my app says is my fertile period.

Good luck Polly! Sounds promising.
Soy can improve egg quality but can also induce ovulation for people who, for whatever reason, do not always ovulate on their own. I've found it brilliant so far but still no bfp, so going to try a month without it in Jan as an experiment to see if I can now ov alone. I'm hoping it's re-set things for me.

I only know for sure I ovulated this month as I temped and it went up, but guess I'll have more of a pattern once I've been doing it a while. Still no AF though loads of lower back and right thigh pain (always my cue for AF) so I reckon it might be coming tomorrow.
One odd thing this cycle is that I haven't had the swollen boobs thing. Usually it's like clockwork around the time i presume I ovulate. This month, nothing, yet I know I did ov. Weird!

Proper cramps and temp drop today so am out. Disappointing! I wish I wasn't so obsessive about it all but it is hard to be relaxed and rational I find. Off to yoga now to try and forget about it!

Sorry to hear that Polly.
It's so hard not to obsess, I totally do.
Am determined not to this month but I know I will!

Am I able to join this thread? I know title is 40+ but I'm 39 and 3 months trying to conceive number 1 after a missed miscarriage in August. I'm on another thread for ladies who have had miscarriages but the vast majority of them are in their 20's and early 30's so I sometimes feel it's a bit different for me.

Absolutely petrified I'll never have a child.

If I can't join I understand

Hi CoastalChick, I’m new so not sure I get a say but welcome :). The odds are good at 39. How long have you been trying?

@Karigan1 thank you for the welcome.

Not long. We (very surprisingly) got pregnant first go in July but that obv ended in MMC end Aug (I was about 10 weeks but baby had died at 6). We've tried on 3 cycles since (and gone at it harder than first time) and nothing.

I also worry as I'm not in the best of health. I had a really stressful job a few years ago and my hair started falling out and I have other auto immune symptoms. GP keeps saying nothing wrong with me but I'm convinced there is.

Some of my friends have had miscarriages but the one who I gave mainly talked to is 27 and has since had a healthy child and so doesn't really get the age worry thing!

Think I'd just like to chat with some ladies around my age/slightly older who get it and can maybe give tips/hope

Sorry to hear about your loss. I know quite a few people who had miscarriage after falling pregnant first try. Did you come off the pill by any chance as they all did and I now have a theory that it takes a while for the body to be ready after the pill even if an egg gets fertilised. That’s why I stopped the pill last month but we’re only going to start trying when a proper AF comes to visit. I’m spending this month loading up on folic acid and taking coenzyme q10 as it’s supposed to be good for egg quality :)

Should say they all went on to have a healthy baby shortly after.

@karigan1 - thank you. No, I came off in Jan as plan had been to start in April but OH had a panic as we bought a new house then and he couldn't cope with so much change at once! So we started trying in July.

I think loading up on the old folic acid is a good idea. I also heard that for us older ladies we should be taking ubiquinol rather than Co-enzyme Q10 as our older bodies struggle to break the Q10 down. Not sure if that true but I started ubiquinol this cycle. Oh and acupuncture too.

Good luck with your trying!!

Welcome coastalchick! Sorry to hear of your MMC. Unfortunately it is more common as we age, but does not mean we cannot go on to have healthy babies.
I have friends currently having healthy babies at 42, so there is hope!
I heard the same about CQ10, so am currently taking ubiquinol. And royal jelly for egg quality. It's all worth a try.