40+ ttc: bring on the bfp's!

[ababsurdum]

Continuation of the long-running 40+ ttc thread.

Link to the previous thread.

Thank you ladies. I’m crossing my fingers for you all too! Reading with interest the information about temps. Im learning from you all and will have to start watching them but presently biggest problem is trying to be sensible and not do the BD whilst the vitamins and stuff kick in. Don’t want it to happen this month as I only just started taking them and stopped the pill and want baby to have the best chance of sticking. I’m a very lucky lass and we tend to do it most days anyway even though we’ve been togther 3 years now!

Alibaba sorry the soy did not work for you. I think it works miracles for those who do npt ovulate on their own every month, but hit & miss as to how it affects those who do. Have you tried angus cactus? I've read that is very good for those who do ov but need to regulate cycle lengths etc

Karigan you have more patience and will power than me!! Haha

I haven't tried temp, I might have to if nothing happens soon. I had a peak on the advanced ovulation test for the first time ever this month! Typical it was when DH was working away. I think we could have caught the end of it the day he was back but he was so tired from travelling and couldn't...ahem...perform 😨 mortified! I tried so hard not to be annoyed but I'm fed up we've wasted this month.

So sorry to read that Polly :(
Littlemimosa, I have just started temping and opks this month after 15 months of not using contraception but not officially 'trying' and nothing happening. My pre ov temp seems to be 36.5, though had one drop then higher temp on about day 9 of cycle. OPKs have given me 3 days of positives today and last 2 days though, so don't think I did ov early. I'm later than my app fertile window though, so that is interesting. I'll see if my temp rises over the next day or so.
Jojoyorker, I find I am putting pressure on DP to be available for the whole fertile window period and I feel cross if he doesn't want to. I know that sort of attitude will be no good for me or him or us or ttc, but it's hard not to sometimes when you know you only have a brief window then that's it for another month.

We had a situation this month where DH couldn't 'perform' on a potentially vital day, and I really struggled to not be annoyed! It is hard though when you know you are limited to just a few days where you have a chance and we really need to just take that opportunity. Really frustrating! And then I feel really mean for being annoyed as it's obviously not his fault.

Cleozeta I totally know what you mean!
DP is off to get his sperm tested tomorrow. I feel nervous on his behalf! Really hope he is ok as then it's just down to me and donor eggs is always a possibility down the line.

DH has not had his tested. I think because we've had the problems on my side we have never even considered his, maybe we should! He is 44 so probably worth checking, otherwise I could be going all out trying to sort me out when another problem lies elsewhere. That would be just typical

I have been reluctant to spend too much on things like acupuncture and more tests for me until I know DP ok. I've done the NHS tests and the GP has just referred me for an ultrasound to check tubes etc but that's all free (and I know the blood tests don't tell you much). He also drinks too much so if that's slowing things down, better for someone else to tell him!
I think it's always worth getting both tested isn't it? Even if he's fine, at least you can eliminate that as a possible source of worry and you know to focus on you...

AF arrived. CD 29 but 19DPO. I knew I wasn't pregnant but you always get that glimmer of hope until you see blood:(

Going to get a GP appointment booked this week and probably a sperm analysis too.

Ali - can you explain about the SI freezing your oestrogen? I'm sorry it didn't work the way you wanted it to. What if you start it later in your cycle?

Sorry AF arrived Mimosa.

Well what I’ve read is that the SI blocks the oestrogen receptors in your brain so your body should produce more oestrogen. However it’s unpredictable how your body will react to the SI.

I just felt that I normally get more twinges in my ovaries than this cycle. We’ll see when AF arrives whether it’s any heavier which would be a sign of increased oestrogen. Maybe it had no effect whatsoever...

PollyIndia I think you are right. I'll get onto that. How did your DP sperm test go?

Sorry AF arrived littlemimosa, always so disapointing, esp when we've had so much hope. Fingers crossed for next month.

I've not much clue how the SI works but I definitely ov when taking it, so will keep going! Yes works for some and not for others. In a way its a good sign if it doesnt work as it probably means you don't need it! My periods definitely heavy but I think that's just age related.

Not sure weather to take a risk next month and not take SI. Want to chill out on the whole ttc thing in december so I can relax and enjoy christmas. Although not sure if by not taking soy/doing opks/temping I'll just stress even more about not knowing whats going to happen to my cycle and will I ever get another period or chance again as I'm sure it's only soy keeping my cycles going at the moment.....

It was all normal. Better than normal. But at least we know that, so now I know it's worth spending a bit on acupuncture and herbs and supps etc as it's all down to my old eggs. I think having a month off sounds like a splendid idea. I'm going to - away this weekend, plus hosting xmas and got some other fun things. Might as well forget about it then in January I'll be ready to give up everything fun again.

Well, not everything fun!

Glad it all went well! Now you know to focus on you.
I think if I knew I would ovulate alone I would be able to chill. But I know I won't relax otherwise. Might force myself to do it. Probably need a break from it anyway as I don't know how many months in a row it is safe to do soy. I've done 3 now.
Get back to it in Jan maybe. Scary!

Wtf is it with Drs surgery’s. Just had a phone call that goes ‘we got back your test results and most of them are normal apart from your something something hormone levels’ the dr needs to know where you were with your cycle. I haven’t got a clue since I got throughly confused as to when I stopped taking the pill sometime roughly two weeks ago. I say this and say I think roughly round 15. To which I get back thank you we’ll phone you back. Now nothing and I’m sat here stressing if there’s a problem with my hormones as the ‘most’ suggests that it was abnormal!!!

That is what they said to me when I had my checks done. FSH was high, meaning perimenopause. (Probably not that in your case as you are just off the pill so would not show)
What were they checking for?
So frustrating when you just need to know. I waited ages for a call back too, and when it came it wasn't even my usual dr, it was a stand in who gave me different feedback than my normal dr who I saw when I got back from holiday. So frustrsting.
Fingers crossed all ok for you

I went to get my thyroxine levels checked as we’re just starting down the ttc route and I have a thyroid disorder. She said she’d do hormones whilst at it.

Thinking it may be because of bad timing as test was done pretty much round ovulation time and I’ve been told to go back on day 21 of my cycle to do another one.

Going to be worrying for the next week now lol

They should have checked where you were in the cycle the day you booked in if cd was important. Have they told you any more than that?

Good luck, hope you don't have to wait too long

Karigan - I wouldn't stress too much yet. If your bloods weren't done on the right day it wouldn't be right anyway. Also if you've only just come off the pill it's going to potentially take a few cycles for your hormones to settle down properly.

I finally went for my results today. They were day 21 bloods but they did them all. My progesterone was 51 (in the words of my GP 'the best she's seen in a while!! yeah that's why my boobs hurt so much post ov!), my TSH was 1.7 which is apparently good, my prolcatin was 'good' (she didn't give the number) and my LH was 11 and FSH 6.5. All very good BUT i know that the LH and FSH were done on completely the wrong days. I didn't ask for a repeat as she's referred me to fertility/gynea clinic. She also said my ovary scan looked normal and no cysts. Phew. I would like my tubes checked next though.

So all good but no explanation for why no pregnancy yet. Probably just old eggs like you say PollyIndia:-(

Sounds great there littlemimosa! Maybe its just a matter of time. All really good results though, so very positive

I wish I knew the numbers from my results. Dr really brushed over numbers. Might have to go back as have been ttc for about 8 or 9 months now with no luck. Only test I've had is hormones. And it wasn't even on CD3

Karigan - when you had your blood test did they give you a form listing what they were testing? You could go in first thing and ask Reception for a print out.

Little what were the tests called you had? I went to the doctor but he's only done the day 21 tests and hasn't mentioned any others. Were they full hormone tests or something? My first 21 day was less than 10 but this month it was 50 something! Typical it was this month we couldn't DTD. I have one more 21 day test to do. Feel a bit flat at the moment as should be in the TWW at least you have some hope then.

Cleo - definitely worth going back and asking for repeats. My acupuncturist told me you need two or three sets anyway to build up a true picture of your hormones. I was going to request a repeat today but as she immediately said she’d refer me I presume they’ll do it again there anyway.

Jojo - I’ve no idea to be honest. My gp just said ‘fertility testing’. She told me today it included progesterone, oestrogen, prolactin, LH & fsh but also iron and thyroid. I’m guessing that it was hormone profile plus iron and thyroid. She’s really clued up my gp. Well fairly. I think she should really have done my fsh on day 3 but when I questioned her on it she said ideally yes day 3, but that doing it anytime in cycle gives a general idea.

Ah I see now what you’re saying Jojo. Your progesterone was 10 one month and 50 another. Both on day 21. Just goes to prove that you need a few sets of tests to build up a true picture.

Hi I phoned them back and quizzed them. It was the Fsh that was high. Googling says that should spike round ovulation so I’m taking it as normal at present. Dr says go back and redo the test next week. I did tell her it was about 2 weeks since I stopped the pill 🤷‍♀️ Maybe she thought it would take some time to get slotted in to do bloods.