40+ ttc: the one where we all get knocked up!

[ababsurdum]

Shiny new thread. Here's the link to the previous one.

Thomasina76 I really hope for you that it's just a case of catching a good egg. Have you read 'It starts with the egg?' If not I would highly recommend it.

I don't mind you asking at all. My boy Billy-Joe died of acute bacterial sepsis, caused by strep A. Basically he had a cold and he was teething heavily (rear molars). Strep A bacteria probably got into his bloodstream from his nose/throat (where it normally lives harmlessly) via his nasal membranes, which were more porous than usual because of his cold & general teething snottiness. Being a strong lad with a good immune system, his natural immunity tried to attack the blood infection by going into overdrive and causing systemic inflammation & internal bleeding. This is basically what sepsis is - the body's own over-reaction to an infection in the bloodstream. The stronger you are, the faster it takes you, so he was gone within 3 hours of becoming poorly. He died in my arms in the ambulance on the way to hospital. We do what we can now to raise sepsis awareness, as it kills 44,000 people every year which is far more than more commonly known conditions like meningitis.

Trying again is what is keeping me going. It's 10 months today since he died. It should be his 2nd birthday this month. Going for IVF and working towards parenthood again is my reason for breathing, as well as keeping his memory alive.

Sorry to be a downer and give the sepsis 'lecture' but it's so important that parents understand it. I would encourage everyone to find out as much as you can.

Anyway, back to the regularly scheduled programme....!!!

Mrfuzzy/amanda it may be worth thinking about ivf so you least know a fertilized egg is there. Then just needs to stick

Incy - not sure about naturally ttc but with ivf and est fet they thicken lining of womb with progynova - but it sure if also halts own eggs

Have heard acupuncture can help linings so that's worth a go

Welcome Thomasina! I like to remind myself it only takes one egg... I have good amh but it never catches... One day it will.

Fuzzy - I am equally confused with the estrogen/progesterone role in lining. I know basics but not how the hell to fix things.

Thanks Blondes - I'll look into that!

I was having acupuncture twice a cycle (month ish) up until I was attacked by a dog a month ago and was unable to drive to the appointment. As everything broke down at once I found I couldn't afford it but called today about starting my appointments again.

Ababs- I got an email yesterday saying it cost £150 for consultation and about £100 for bloods and SA. We've had these done on NHS in past three months so hoping we could maybe bypass that additional cost. There was no more info than that from them. I might just go along out of curiosity.

MrFuzzyGreen I hope you can mark your son's birthday in a meaningful way. It will not be an easy day for you but I'm sure none of them are

Such a shame the clinic weren't more helpful too.

Thanks for the reminder on sepsis, I will do some research so I know what to look out for.

Welcome Thomasina76. I started ttc when I turned 40 and it took me 14 months and a failed IVF to get a bfp. Luckily for me that one stuck. You're not out yet, it might just take longer than you thought or hoped.

Incywincyspinster I hope you're ok after the dog bite, sounds nasty. I would go to the appointment if you can afford it. You might always be wondering if they could have helped otherwise.

I will be returning to acupuncture as it did seem to help with pms related ibs and I didn't seem to get pms for as long- this month off I had 2 weeks full on pms & it was horrific

Thank you ababs. A good friend is running a 10k in his honour on his birthday. Next year we are planning a family fun day. Both are to raise money & awareness of sepsis.

Blondes, we have an appt at an IVF clinic later this month. We're just going for it - no more messing about. I'm on cd22 today, not feeling like I've caught naturally. None of the usual symptoms I'd normally have by now. I know it's too early to rule it out, but my gut tells me it's onto IVF for me.

Incywincyspinster, I'm glad acupuncture works for you. I tried it once for a back problem and it didn't help, so I've been skeptical ever since, but if you know it works for you then hopefully it can help. I've also read about fertility massage & yoga for improving blood flow. Sorry to hear of the dog attack - sounds awful.

MrFuzzy, I cried reading your post. Your beautiful boy. I think you are amazing just for getting through the day. I hope that time somehow eases the pain and that you get your BFP very soon. Can't be anyone more deserving. Will also do some reading up on sepsis. xxx

IncyWincy, v sorry about the dog bite. Do you mind me asking how long you have been trying and what your AMH was? Mine was 7.1 - dr said it was within normal but not sure it's that good.

Abbas, I hope you are right and that's it's just taking a bit longer. Have convinced myself it isn't going to happen. CD19 for me so guessing too early for symptoms although the only symptom I recall from my other pregnancies was needing to go for a wee very early in the morning.

Hi Thomasina - I've been trying for about 18+ months with 1 v early mc in Jan. My amh is 17.2 pmol which is considered low for all age groups but good for 40+Yrs I think average for 40+ was 4 - I haven't had so much as a sniff of a bfp since mc or before that. I'm full of duds it would seem. Oh has more than enough sperm and apparently they're all dead sexy and swim in the right direction... so I'm the problem :( I don't appear to ovulate very regularly or if I do it's not strong enough to produce enough progesterone. My Luteal phase is all over the place.
Amh of 7 isn't bad at all. I've heard of women with 1> falling pregnant naturally.

MrFuzzygreen I also cried reading about Billie Joe, bless you, I hope that Monday was ok, Best of luck with IVF, I will do some reading up on Sepsis.

I have been put off IVF as at 41 I am not sure that they will suggest using my eggs? Will they?

I am due tomorrow but I had a bleed on day 18 so honestly I have no idea what to expect this month. I am hoping that I am not pre menopausal.

Hello everyone I wanted to join for a bit of camaraderie. I'm new to all of this so don't understand the terminology so apologies for long hand.
I'm 41 and ttc #2 for a while now but have been rather slack and letting it happen naturally (which it hasn't). I'm hoping this time it's diff. I'm 10 after conception (assumed of course) and I've got mixed symptoms - if swear it was period coming but somehow feels like more. Apart from all day cramping and sore breasts I'm also nauseous. And this might sound insane but I've been having really vivid dreams about pg. I did a test yesterday and it was negative (due around now but not sure exactly when). I'm doing another tonight in the hopes I can lay this to bed and know either way. I can't concentrate at work and am in the toilet every hour (mainly checking for bleeding but peeing too).
Have only been pg once in my life and that was an accident so didn't go through this. How on earth do same people cope!

Lol bless you Jibberro and welcome! Yes it is indeed a challenging process but beautiful one also .

The best way is to not let you obsess about it. It is very easy to analyse it all. I am 43 and never been pregnant in my life - YET, but according to my mind most month since I have been trying to conceive I am!!

I do have a metallic taste and have had this for 4 days, never before but hey until I get a positive I am not going to let it get to me ha!

Well I say that now but we will see in just over a week......

Lots of love to all in plane for Milan..

Well, I'm due af on Sunday and so far don't feel nauseous, no cramping, boobs not tender, nipples a ok too...in fact, I'd go as far as to say I feel much more energetic than I usually do .

You'll be pleased to hear that it hasn't stopped me testing despite the hopeless outlook ha ha!

Hope you guys are on a more promising stage in your baby making journeys?

Metallic taste sounds promising star-where are you up to re testing?

Well sadly I got a big fat 0 (wait is that what bfp stands for? Big fat positive?)

While the symptoms haven't gone away I know I'm kidding myself that it would be otherwise.

Oh well more fun in the trying anyway.
Star good luck on your retest!

Jibberoo did I read it right that you are 10 dpo? If that's right your definitely not out yet. Plus, testing in the morning gives a truer result, so it's worth testing again.

Yes I realise it maybe too early but I figured that if there was enough hormone to give me symptoms surely it must register.
I'm not 100% sure when I'm due to come on. All I know is the only date that conception could have taken place is 10 days ago.
I'll give myself till Monday to retest. I'm flying home on Friday so won't be able to do it till I'm back on Monday anyway.

Just landed flipping heck BA is becoming totally unreliable!! Anyway, breathe....

Sorry did not express myself properly earlier on as I wanted to write quickly before we took off, so i have not tested and not planning to until I am late otherwise Star turns into a Psycho. However, I have had a metallic taste since Friday the 2nd on and off. I read that around ovulation it can happen and also the prenatal vitamins can be the cause of it. So it is not promising, moreover because my app says I ovulated on Sat so I am 4 days after ovulation. My cycle is quite regular 27/28 days.

Honestly I don't understand where all these symptoms come from I never had them before but now I do ha!

I would love to get a positive though!

I never got any metallic taste with my daughter but with preg in Jan I had it literally for 5 mins one morning at 8dpo then nothing. (Got bfp at 9/10dpo but mc)

I too get every pregnancy symptom going, even on months where I haven't been trying... I no longer trust my body to tell me.

Hello all, Newbie here and have just spent the best part of 5 hours reading threads and getting quite excited about TTC! a little bit about me (I think I have most of the acronyms right but apologise if I don't!)

I'm 41, DH 43, no children yet, TTC#1 Cycle 1, CD 15, DTD CD 11 and CD 14, I have just ordered some OTK's online and would love to join in your thread!

Look forward to the tremendous amount of support you all offer each other!

Hi let's my your an early bird or are you a restless sleeper?

I'm new too and unlike you have no idea about the acronyms but welcome and good luck!

Hello letsdothis - good luck to you - and to everyone else ttc :)

Welcome newbies, and good luck!

Sorry to everyone I made cry I really don't mind talking about my son, or sepsis, so if you have any questions, please do ask. Billy-Joe has his own 'Remembering Billy-Joe' page which you can find through Facebook or Google, and there's a lot of info about sepsis if you scroll through. It's got our real names & area in it, but I'm going to go right ahead and assume that none of you are crazy stalker types with nothing better to do.....

Dpo11 for me. 100% certain that I'm out for this month. I was getting really upset because it's our last go before IVF, but DH feels relieved. His best mate & wife caught again a few weeks before IVF was due to start, & mc'd at 8w. All it did was delay everything by about 4 months.

FurryMinky, I think it depends about using your own eggs. Our friends who used a donor only had enough money for one shot at IVF. Her bloods were not looking good for egg quantity and she'd had 2 miscarriages, so they advised donor eggs to maximise the odds. If your levels are ok & everything looks good, I think they'd be happy to use your eggs on the understanding that the stats won't be as much in your favour as with donors. We're hoping to try a few rounds with my own, but then we'd go to donor if needs be.

Haha Jiberoo!!! Yes, bfn, big fat negative. Bfp, big fat positive. Hoping to see more BFPs soon!

I applaud you for raising awareness about sepsis mrfuzzygreen if it wasn't for regular parents talking about things I'd not know about half the things I do. There's nothing like a real voice to make the point clear - and not all causes can afford advertising so without people like you a lot of us wouldn't know.
Personally I'm shocked that sepsis kills more than meningitis which gets so much awareness. Big thank you for educating at least this one additional person

Just wanted to wave hello. I am lurking and not managing to keep up with all posts on here! Currently no idea how many dpo or even if I have o which is refreshing had a 7 week cycle after my failed FET now hoping this one will be a bit more normal.
Hi to all the newbies and so pleased pies for the bfp sending happy healthy thoughts your way