TTC after miscarriage thread #6

[jodiebee664]

New thread for all navigating the bewildering world of trying to conceive after a miscarriage. Whether you have dc or are ttc your first, all are welcome here. We share the positive, the negative and the down right confusing.

Here's link to previous thread...www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2657346-TTC-after-miscarriage-thread-5?noti=1#62460035

little fingers crossed! One of my cats always tells me when I'm pregnant too, he's not clingy though he just obsessively tries to sniff my underware but he's still a decent pregnancy test! When's your test day?

Thanks a lot ladies :) feeling more positive today and going to get on with dtd to catch that next egg. Nice to know I'm not alone/a horrible bitch for being so angry, upset and everything else as first emotion rather than happy for her. And mrsamelia that I'd a very good thought to keep hold off that at least we know we can get pregnant! It's hard to think of the positives like that sometimes so that might be a new little mantra when I'm feeling low.

Hya ladies, I thought I'd join in if that's ok.
I've 5 children and had 3 miscarriages, in between having my children.
The last time it happened was November last year and it was another MMC, I've had 2 of those and one early normal one of you like.
I've left off trying for my final baby because of the fear of it happening again as it was an extremely traumatic event last time where I had to have intervention which led me to haemorrhage and have to have emergency surgery.
My husband was very supportive and said that although he thinks we've got at least 4 too many kids as it is lol that when I was ready we could try for our last baby, I felt like last month felt like a good month and it seems I have been extremely fortunate to fall pregnant straightaway, seemingly being 22dpo (5wks + 1 day) and have been getting BFP since 11dpo.
I'm just absolutely terrified as the thought of going through the loss again is doing me in😥 Obviously when trying to turn to my common sense (which I do actually have some of, even though I have 5 kids lol) I'm trying to be positive and say, come on girl you given birth to 5 healthy children the body hasn't failed you always, I'm kinda struggling.
Would be nice to find a friend or too that can relate xxxx

alb yes it felt like he was saying I just had to suffer one more before I was allowed any help! I'm never bothered with seeing a male or female doctor but maybe a female would have had more empathy in this situation.

little fingers crossed kitty is right!

emily thanks, that's made me feel better...hopefully same will happen for me!

mojitos yes we all understand all those emotions and have all had them...but yes we are all very lucky we can conceive...one day we'll all get our lovely little baby...the wait isn't easy though!

alb cats are funny creatures aren't they! Lol at your cat! Mine also usually brings a present in for me from outside, she hasn't done that as yet so maybe it's all in my head. My cycles are still all over the place so will probably test next week if AF doesn't appear before then! Normally don't get a positive until about 15/16dpo anyway

So sorry you had to push like that jbee. As if the whole process isn't damaging enough.

Hahaha, Little funny you should say that. DDog takes to obsessively sniffing my breath when I am pregnant. He will sniff for ages, then draw his head back and tilt it away and give me this "Is there something you are not telling me?" look before going back to sniffing again. I swear he can tell something is up.

Hi becqui. There is a thread for people who are pregnant after a miscarriage. I can relate to how you are feeling, I have had 3 unsuccessful pregnancies and really felt the fear the second and third one. Most of the chat on here is more about the getting pregnant bit, so you may find people more on your wavelength over there. Here is the link

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/pregnancy/2685123-Staying-posifrickentive-Thread-10-for-ladies-pg-after-mc

Sample handed in for SA today. Fingers crossed that comes back ok.

It's awful that standard policy seems to be that we have to go through three miscarriages before they will be willing to refer us. I understand that they can't refer every woman who miscarries because the NHS just couldn't afford it, but if someone has had two in a row then should we really have to battle just to get some fairly basic testing done?

Does everyone else find that they spot symptoms in the two week wait regardless of whether or not they go on to get a BFP/N? Despite being a lot more chilled out about it all this month I have experienced a couple of things that are very much out of the ordinary for me in the past couple of days (a fairly severe but very short-lived headache, and a tiny bit of pink stuff that looked almost like tissue when I went for a wee which obviously I am hoping was something to do with implantation), but is it just madness?

Thanks brenna, wishing you luck x

Hi everyone, would anyone like my stash of IC ovulation tests? I'm a grad of this thread and 16 wks pg after 3 MCs. Had all the tests done, nowt could be found wrong so was advised to get on with dtd, and finally a bean stuck 😀.

So if anyone would like these, please pm me your address and I'll shall pop them in 2nd class post.

Oooh mimi I'll take you up on that offer if you don't mind and no one has yet?! I've never used opks before but was thinking of starting next cycle if bfn this one again as I think I'm missing it. Congrats on your sticky bean!!!

newshoes funnily enough the cycle I got my BFP was the only one I hadn't convinced myself I was pg! I could swear it now as currently feeling yucky, bloated and soooo tired but seeing as I'm cd15 after a heavy 5 day af it's highly unlikely 😂

Moonlight the stash is yours, pm your address please! Thanks for the congrats, still can't believe nothing has gone wrong so far. But I think it's fairly normal to feel like this until a live baby turns up. Hope the IC stash brings you good luck

Hi all,

Hope everyone is doing well. Been lurking here since my last Af... I'm on cd16 today & according to the app I use I ovulated today. My cm has been like egg whites since Monday & has gone more milky today (sorry tmi!) I feel like it's so soon in my cycle to ovulate? My boobs have been really sore since yday, I'm confused? Too early for pregnancy symptoms? But too early for AF symptoms too? Could the soreness be from ovulation? Also been feeling really down and thinking about my misscarriage a lot recently, I've only had 1 & it was at 6 weeks in April. Keep thinking how I would be halfway through by now :( Help please! X

Hi Cookie. How long is your cycle? Anything reasonably average like a 28–32 day cycle and you would expect to ovulate somewhere between days 12–16 I think.

The egg white cervical mucus highlights your most fertile days. This is the type of mucus that the sperm like to swim up. Once your mucus goes beyond that and changes consistency, you've most likely ovulated.

Have you ever done OPKs? It might help you get a better understanding of your cycle.

I have a 28 day cycle and ovulate on CD13. Before my miscarriage my cycle was 30 days and I was ovulating on CD15. Without the OPKs I wouldn't have easily spotted this change in ovulation day.

newshoes wow this is so interesting, we're almost cycle twins! Before mc my cycles were 29 days with ov cd 15, first cycle after was 26 days with ov cd 13 (I think) this is cycle2 since mc and pretty sure I ovd cd13 again so expecting another slightly shorter cycle. Defo going to opk next cycle to confirm. I'd never even thought about the mc effecting cycles before. I knew first cycle after mc would be a bit crazy so thought that was fluke and so it's only this one when it happened early again that I thought it odd.

Hi INeedNewShoes

My cycles were averaging at around 33 days before mc & are now about 30 days.

Yeah I did read that online about what to expect my cm to be like during ovulation... No I haven't used OPK's I'm always pretty sure when I ovulate I was just confused as I thought it may be too early & could be something else.

I'm still pretty young & my cycles sometimes confuse me so please excuse any basic questions I may ask🙈

Thankyou for your quick response xx

They're not basic questions! I know far more than I ever imagined I would because when you're using insemination to get pregnant timing is absolutely everything, so I've read lots and lots and am a bit of a mine of information on this stuff now, if I might say so myself

Ask away!

So good to hear things are going well Mimi.

That sounda bout right for ovulations Cookie. I have a 28-31 day cycle with a 16 day luteal phase (jumped from 15 to 16 days after my last m/c), so I ovulate between CD 14 and 17 normally.

Hello all.

Just checking in! 9dpo here but not feeling very hopeful anymore! Ah well what will be will be and I really do need to lose some weight so if AF shows it's another month of eating well and exercising which I do need so I will focus on that.

It's funny - I had no idea re any ttc stuff when we first started trying. But now I'm feel like an expert and could probably act as some kind of ttc adviser lol.

Hope you all have a nice relaxing and happy Saturday.

Pooch I'm 10dpo today so we're pretty much in the same place. It's taking quite a bit of will power not to test yet. Will you test or just wait to see if AF shows up?

Despite having a couple of 'symptoms' a couple of days ago my absolute gut feeling this time is that I'm not pregnant. I feel different to the cycles where I had BFPs.

Fingers crossed for you both! I'm 4dpo but I'm not sure I ovulated, couldn't get a positive opk and no ewcm, and it's been a really stressful month! But you never no I guess

alb I'm 3 dpo (I think) so we may be testing at the same time. I will be testing on 8th September if no af by then (that feels like soooo long away). Not feeling very hopeful this month though as don't think we caught ov.

I'm actually feeling like I'm looking forward to next cycle already as going to try opks for the first time and keen to have a clearer idea what's going on.

moon I no what you mean, iv bought the clear blue duel hormone digital thing next month and I'm already looking forward to starting using it. Iv never had close to a positive opk so I'm hoping digital will work better for me. You have far more self control than me waiting till then to test! Il probably be testing from 7dpo

ineed great to have a cycle buddy. Normally I'd cave and test around 11/12 DPO, but I'm going to try and hold off and see if AF arrives.

I've got this fear that if I were to test early and by some miracle it was a bfp I'd convince myself it was hcg still knocking around post MC and get all stressed an confused, In all 4 of my pregnancies I've never got a clear bfp before 15/16 dpo anyway. I'm not hopeful either, my gut instinct tells me it's not been our month to be honest so why I'm even thinking about it is beyond me!

Do you think you'll be able to hold out much longer?

AF arrived today. CD1 and ready to get cracking again.

Hello everyone sorry I haven't been on for a while! I get so obsessive about things I was trying to stop myself constantly thinking about babies and just enjoy having lots of carefree sex and I do feel so much happier for it, and my OH seems the same! We are just relaxed and happy and busy doing housey/weddingy things. You think you will never get over the miscarriage but already I feel like if it happens again at least now we will know what to expect.
I have come back now because I have had two sessions of acupuncture and the lady I see said that lower back pain in early pregnancy can indicate a fertility issue, and a lot of her patients have had lower back pain before miscarrying. The backache and cramps were the first sign I had before that I was pregnant, I literally knew it straightaway it was almost period pain but slightly different.
So for the last two days or so I have had that exact feeling again. I don't want to do a test because I don't want to know I am pregnant again, I am just dreading starting to bleed. I haven't had a period since my miscarriage on the 17th of July but I only stopped spotting on the 8th of August (went on for sooo long!) Could I have already fallen?? Or do you think I am just reading in to it? And does this backache mean it's already a doomed pregnancy? I'm sorry for all the questions!! Xx