TTC after miscarriage thread #6

[jodiebee664]

New thread for all navigating the bewildering world of trying to conceive after a miscarriage. Whether you have dc or are ttc your first, all are welcome here. We share the positive, the negative and the down right confusing.

Here's link to previous thread...www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2657346-TTC-after-miscarriage-thread-5?noti=1#62460035

Just a couple of things.

For those ladies who have had 2 MCs. I managed to get my GP to do the majority of the bloods that would be done at recurrent miscarriage clinic after my second MC so always worth asking.

On the subject of Aspirin. Obviously you need to make your own decision and be comfortable with it and this is not official medical advice. I did quite a bit of reading and wasn't sure what to do. One of my friends is an Obs and Gynae doctor and when I asked her she said there is a chance it could make a difference but it wouldn't do any harm. I also spoke to my GP who was of the same opinion. I decided to take it with my third MC. Unfortunately it wasn't the magic fix for me but at least I felt I was trying something. I just bought Aspirin 75mg tablets from the supermarket so no need for a prescription.

Oliversmummy26, no i just done some research and it doesn't do harm but it can help.. some people at least so it's worth a try?

Emily86 - Did they mention any other reasons into mc? I've never spoken to anyone medically and really want to know what drs etc suggest causes and any prevention..

I guess sometimes it can be the baby not forming etc but now it's happened twice it could happen again and then I'm def going to be thinking something's up!!!!

Hello to the newcomers. And sorry you're here.

Got a blazing positive OPK yesterday evening and then DH rocker in runs at midnight so no inclination to dtd. Could have throttled him, as he was supposed to be home at 8.30/9 and then kept 'missing the train' . Pretty difficult to catch one when you're still in the pub!! He rarely goes out, just seemed shit timing so I'm pretty annoyed.

Think I'll jump on him this morning and then kill him later .

It's my day off today. Counselling after lunch and just general mooching. around planned. Will to head out for a run at some point too. DH is off today and had grand plans of what he was going to do around the house... Can't see that happening!

Should have checked that one. Meant to say DH rocked in at midnight. No idea what the rocker and runs in is about!

Happy Friday everyone!

Hi say
Giggling here at the giving out to him later. Good luck.
Heading to GP this morning, bit nervous, really hoping they are sympathetic and useful. Had acupuncture last night, I was explaining to her how I was feeling with thinking that the mc wasn't complete yet and she went really far with the needles, if you ever choose to do this, please take painkillers first. I started cramping when I was there, but in a weird way it felt good. It reinforced my opinion that the acupuncture really works and even though I am still in pain now, I believe that I need to be in order to get through this as quickly as possible.

Lol say I'd be pretty annoyed too! I don't think my DH gets quite how critical timing is, I blame those lessons at school where they terrified you that even holding hands with a boy would get you pregnant, if only that were true!

Glad the acupuncture has done something for you Miami hope that the GP is helpful today too.

Thanks Mrs
I am just back from docs. She was really nice, she is going to write the letter to recurrent miscarriage for me, she said that they may still refuse as I have not had 3, but that given family history and sonographer notes about heart shaped uterus that there was a definite case to be made for some tests now. And the fact that I am over 35 (just), so hopefully now that will get the ball rolling on that one.
I am feeling more human today, like I have turned a bit of a corner, have made a hair appointment for this afternoon.
Might even have a glass of wine later, have been avoiding alcohol for fear it makes me cry more!

Hello ladies,

thanks for the info on aspirin, I think I'll give it a shot, if it doesn't hurt but might help, anything is worth trying and you're right rose at least it makes you feel like you're doing something

Lol re. DH coming back late and having to jump him later...I'm lucky in that my DH is always up for DTD (forgive the pun!) and it's often me who can't be bothered...as he's away during the week, we make up for lost time at the weekends, so hopefully this will be enough for us. Our fertile window was during our honeymoon when we got lucky last time so we were at it like rabbits! Hoping that we will be good for Christmas time this time, as we're both home for a while..

Christmas shopping here tomorrow, mostly for an outfit for Christmas day for me, I was hoping to be wearign something maternity obviously, and now that I'm not, I've no excuse for my massive bulgey tummy...so need something which will hide it, as evidently I am currently unable to refuse any food at all!! lol

Rose from everything I've been told if you have 2 MCs it is considered to be just bad luck. Once you get to 3 they start looking into it but in the majority of people they don't find a cause and it is put down to one off chromosomal problems which are unlikely to happen again.

Miami I am glad you're feeling a bit better today. I've thought about trying accupuncture a few times but haven't done it yet. Might give it a go when we start TTC again. Have you found it helpful? My GP referred me to the fertility clinic on the basis of my heart shaped uterus. They were happy to see me and that led to the 3D ultrasound I had to assess my uterus further. So it is definitely worth a try. And fingers crossed your referral is accepted.

Say I hope the husband jumping was successful!

DH and I are looking at popping over to the Lakes for a night tomorrow as a treat after this shitty week. Would be good to go for a nice fell walk and blow some cobwebs away.

I hope everyone has a good weekend.

Emily
I have found it very helpful. Just even having half hour every other week where it is just me is quite calming. Also I know this might sound incredibly new agey but I can really feel it. The lady I go to specialises in fertility acupuncture so was very knowledgeable as well yesterday about various tests to try and ensure we get done.
I have booked sessions once a week until Christmas as I do find them very good. It is £30 a session but as I said to my sister earlier, it is worth it for me to feel a little bit more positive. Also I kind of think that I am wanting to throw the kitchen sink at this problem at the moment. I really hope we don't end up down the route of ivf, but if we do I want to be able to think that we really tried everything we could before we got there.
I have read a lot of stuff about this and I have kind of persuaded myself that low progesterone may be an issue for me, and everything I have read also suggests that you can't fix progesterone problems with suppositories, you have to go back further then that. As far as I can see progesterone levels are completely reliant on egg quality and hormone levels controlled by your pituaitary gland (forgive spelling) and one of the main areas they concentrate on in fertility acupuncture is your pituaitary gland so I kind of feel like it won't be doing me any harm anyway and I do leave every session feeling quite upbeat and positive which also can't hurt. I have read the miscarriage book by Lesley green and in it she deals with alternative medicine and basically she acknowledges that modern medicine don't understand everything that happens with miscarriage and until they do she will support any complimentary medicine (acupuncture, reflexology etc etc) that provides comfort and solace to a prospective mother who has been through the shits of miscarriage. Please pm me if you want to chat it through I found my lady on the British acupuncture (or something like that) website.

Hi everyone,

Hope you're all doing well and getting sorted for Christmas?

So we didn't actually do the deed last night. For some reason yesterday I felt really miserable and irritable and tired but I guess we've done the deed a couple of times this week so if it's going to happen it will happen. I think the fact that I've been pregnant twice in two months and not had a period since beginning October is probably putting a bit of a strain on my body!

It's really odd because after you've just done the deed do you think to yourself am I pregnant? I think I'm just going to go with the flow and just hope that things work out right next time, although part of me will be on tender hooks!!!

My dh really wants a dog and for so long I've said no but because of everything that's happened I feel like because she is an only child she misses out on having that little something so this lady is selling is some puppies near me they are Cavapoo cross pug they look really cute.

I'm going to get the aspirin ago carry it on and continue taking folic acid I did wonder whether I could be anaemic and that's why am tired

Xxx

Meant to say my dd wants a dog but dh does too 😉

Here's a pic

Stupidest question ever:

Is the whole "2 week wait" thing based on it taking 2 weeks from conception to being able to get a positive pregnancy test?

In other news my ovulation strips came this morning. Am I right in thinking when your LH is high this is the "fertile period"?

I did physics, not biology for my science at school as I'm sure is apparent

Legend I think the TWW is because the average cycle length is 28 days with ovulation on day 14.

You could start testing from day 8ish if you're not sure when you ovulate.

High LH is your fertile period, yes. Typically the test line on the OPKs gets as dark or darker than the line. I've attached a pic of mine from the last few days if it's helpful.

Should have said, it won't necessarily take 14 days post on for a positive pregnancy test to show (some show as early as 9/10 days post ov).

However, having had a couple of chemicals since MC and driven myself nuts with early testing, my best advise is to try and leave it until you're due/late to test. I could have saved myself anguish for one of my CPs if I hadn't been so impatient. Now it's a habit I need to break for my own sanity!

My counsellor suggested I give myself permission to check out of actively TTC over Christmas. I agreed it sounded like a good idea but am just coming out of FW so nothing to lose now by trying to relax and not obsess over it. Don't think I would have been so agreeable a week ago!

Hi all,

Long time lurker and first time poster but just despairing today & hoping some of you kind ladies might be able to help me .

DD1 is 2.5 - conceived first go
Ttc#2 since July 2016
MMC in September at 8.5 weeks, found out at 12 wk scan & had successful D&C a week later.

My cycles have always been textbook 28 days, could nearly predict the time AF would arrive, not to mind the date! Only started tracking ov when we started ttc no 2 but textbook day 13/14 & conceived again straight away.

Bled for 2 weeks after D&C, then AF proper started 2 wks later. So far so fine. Tracked ov, got faint line around day 11 but no Ewcm & don't think I did ov. AF started again bang on time for 28 day cycle.

TMI ALERT!! This month, dtd on days 10, 12 & 13. All set to go last night for day 14 but didn't feel well. Woke up to pee in the middle of the night & had horrible stabbing pain at the top of my vagina. Thought I was dehydrated and hadn't emptied my bladder properly but had to run for loo with huge urge this morn & there was some bleeding. Tried not to panic as day 15, thought it might be ov spotting but feel utterly run over by a train. Can't get out of bed, no appetite & utterly exhausted. Last time I went to loo there was some small clotting & I am now in bed crying my eyes out with it all. Can anyone please explain what is happening?

I know my journey has been so short compared to some of you but I just see DD getting older & the potential age gap widening & widening & the grief & regret has just come crashing down on me again. Had a difficult first birth which is why we waited so long to start ttc again & now I just feel Guilty that I wasn't stronger for my family's sake & we'd be further along the road.

In case it's any way relevant, my job has been completely insane since September & we have recently moved house & I am absolutely exhausted to my core.

That was longer than I intended - sorry . Thanks in advance for any and all advice

Eden
I am in no way an expert on this but it potentially sounds like you may still be in the midst of your mc unfortunately.
I think you said you bled for two weeks and then AF started 2 weeks after that? I think that most of the stuff I have read suggests that if you bleed again within 20 days of original mc bleed that it counts as a continuation of the mc. If you feel really unwell, have a temp or uncontrolled bleeding I think you need to try and get seen? Our epu here is open on a Saturday hopefully yours is too. Please ring them, or any other emergency details they gave you when you were treated originally.
Don't panic, you will be ok I am sure, it may just be some minor retained products.

Thanks Miami, appreciate you taking time to reply.

the bleeding seems to have stopped and pain has lessened. No temp but I do have that kind of internal shivery feel you get when you're coming down with something. Going to go back to bed & see how I feel in a few hours. I work full time & weekebds with my DD are so precious but no energy at all for her today. Going to see my GP on Monday & see if she can help. This whole thing is just so lonely & frustrating isn't it?

Thanks again Miami

Miami thanks for your thoughts on the accupuncture. I have already found a fertility specific practitioner close to where I live that I think I'd go to. The main reason I'd be doing it would be to have that space for myself with the hope it helps me manage my constant worrying about TTC etc rather than hoping it is the magic fix.

Eden it could also be a urine infection. Do you have open access to your EPU? I'd give them a call tomorrow if you do and are still feeling unwell. They'd be able to check you our for both and give you advice.

Rose a puppy sounds a great idea. I've got a lot of comfort from my cat during this whole business. Probably makes me sound like a slightly crazy cat lady but who cares!

Say thank you for your posts; you're a true star for going to such trouble. Since my mc in Aug I've been averaging 33 day cycles meaning AF is due this week. Will get that out the way and then give the ov strips a spin.

You are SO RIGHT. I've stupidly tested twice this month; by a rough measure my FE would've been end Nov so me testing was daft in the extreme. I had such a rage with the negative I ended up throwing it at the wall in a rage meaning it split in half

Gonna keep eating pate (because I can) and just chill the ---- out for the rest of the year.

This is the negative side of my being so very lucky to get pregnant twice straight away; obviously only one of those successfully. Now I'm all like PREGNANCY NOW PLEASE NOW NOW NOW NOW NOW.

Ach, thank god for this thread. And welcome Eden. Not everyone is as feral and bad tempered as me, promise.

*FW not FW big stupid thumbs

Hope you are feeling better this morning Eden if not maybe call 111 and see if you can get an out of hours gp appointment?

Emily I'm also seeing an acupuncturist and can't recommend it enough. It's the only time I feel I really get to myself to lay and do nothing and feel I can really be honest with her about how I'm feeling about ttc, work etc so it's sort of like therapy too. I hope you enjoy it as much as I do.

Legend I totally am with you on the wanting to be pregnant now now now and then being angry when it doesn't happen. I've decided I'm just going to enjoy Christmas and indulge in all the things you can't have when pregnant and hope 2017 is more successful!

Flashing smiley on CD8 yesterday so looks like FW has started early for me...my cycles have been all over the place since my mc.

I love seeing my acupuncturist too mrsY I feel like I'm doing something proactive - especially during TWW!! I just got a nearly positive opk, but I'm between 4-7 dpo and CD 22/~30. Could I be ovulating late? I feel like I've convinced myself I'm pg but I know that implantation can't have happened yet - can it? Aarrrgggh might just go get a supermarket cheapy to put my mind at rest tomorrow.