Aged 35 or over TTC #2?

[RememberToSmile1980]

Hi ladies
I'm trying to conceive no. 2. My aim was to ttc from January of this year - however due to one thing or another (very stressful time at work!) I have not been giving it my all. I have now decided I need to focus on ttc no.2 as I am very conscious of the growing age gap! Please join for a friendly chat and to hopefully support each other!

Stats
Age - 35
Ttc - #2
CD - 21
DS - 3 years 10months!

Don't want to obsess about it! However I think it's inevitable!

Penguin - WTF! Your boss sounds like a douche-bag. Completely not any of his business and unprofessional to even bring it up during your 1-2-1!

That's awful penguin, I'd be fuming too. I'm very tired and really want to watch the Wales match, no chance of staying awake to DTD afterwards, wondering if half time is enough time!

Penguin that is frigging outrageous! I'd be seething. Some bosses just don't know where the line is and don't even get me started on why that is stupidly insensitive. I know it's a school night but wine may be called for. In fact I might have one for you.

Dad is being kept in so the saga continues.

Going to try to DTD every other night from this evening. Gave DH a pep talk and even used the phrase 'I need a commitment from you!' Sounded like a bloody drill Sargent. Once I get a BFP he can rest

Snuggly 15 minutes? You could do it twice in that time

penguin, I can't believe your boss! That is really inappropriate.
I've just realized that my DH will be away for a few days this month, precisely when I should be ovulating.. Grrrr, I'm feeling really frustrated, as a whole month is wasted..
I'm feeling that time is against me and I'm starting to get concerned about my age, and how fertility decreases, added to the fact that we definitely don't DTD as much as we did pre-DS...

Penguin Your boss is a fuckwit. What a fuckwit. How is it that people who have no idea about how to deal with people in any way whatsoever so often end up in management! Ugh!

Sorry to hear about your Dad, Novino - hope the doctors have been reassuring, but it must all be very stressful. Really hope he improves very soon.

And I know what you mean Zaha - been thinking about age a lot. I was 33 when I conceived DS. That's nearly 5 years ago now and I haven't exactly treated my body-as-temple in past 8 months (very stressful work situation - combined with house renovation - almost daily glasses of wine and way too much coffee). But onward! It's either going to happen, or it ain't. But I'm thinking of getting a fertility check in the next few months, because I'd rather know what I'm looking at here.

GOOD LUCK EVERYONE! Looking forward to hearing some good news.

Beastie and Zaha I feel the exact same way, I was 34 when I conceived DD and 36 when I conceived again but then had a MC just after my 37th birthday. I was also told by a person in senior management (luckily not my direct boss as he is in the same league as penguins boss in the fuckwittery stakes) the other day that I came across more like a woman in my 40's - WTF! I know I've had a hard paper round but come on. When you are worried about conceiving and age, this is not what you want to hear. We must stay positive but its bloody hard not to get stressed and to have a sunny outlook when these months seem to drag. Speaking of dragging, where is my DH?!

Evening all!

Sorry to hear your dad is still in hospital novino, hope he continues to improve.

penguin I can't believe your boss had the audacity to say that! I am on your behalf! How unprofessional.

I do wish our bodies have us more clues as to what was happening inside. Like if your toenails went blue when you're ovulating or something. Orange for pregnant maybe? Life would be so much easier with half of the guesswork removed!

I'm hoping I can drag DH to bed shortly. One more bite of the apple and all that. I'm away for two nights tomorrow with DD to a family wedding, DH is staying at home so at least he'll get a break from me. We've had more sex in the last week than probably the last six months, and two nights in a row is unheard of! So he'll probably be glad to see the back of me for 48 hours in the morning.

beastie that link is amazing, Ill be on the lookout for that, although last time I didn't even realise I was pregnant till I was about 6/7 weeks, and that was only cos I turned down some chicken (I live on chicken normally!!)

Im now on the 2ww, Ovulated yesterday, dtd twice in 1 day (Im waaayyyy past those days, so quite an achievement for me) I feel as if I should be pregnant as a reward for managing twice in a day anyway

penguin your boss is a dick. Fact. Half of me would have sat there and told him the truth and watched him squirm in horror at the gruesome details, but im evil like that sometimes.

@ novino's pep talk. He'll have 9 months to rest, what's up with the man

Exactly Buddah! I will explain that next time. Well done on a spectacular achievement! I don't even know how you managed the logistics of that feat! You shall inspire us all.

Thanks Send he's asking for contraband (just chocolate) and moaning about my step mum being alone with his credit cards so I figure he's definitely on the mend.

Thanks everyone for confirming it wasn't just me being oversensitive about my boss. DH doesn't really get it, because he's a man I think. Definitely going to say something to boss.

I would love the blue toenails signal for ovulation Send. While we're at it there are a few other tweaks I would make to the whole conception/pregnancy/birth system as well! Our amazing bodies my arse grumble grumble who thought some of this stuff up?

Impressed with the DTD dedication this month. Loving the pep talk Novino. My DH thinks all his Christmases have come at once - it is me who is seriously flagging! Sorry your dad didn't get discharged after all but good to hear he is acting like his usual self. Definitely a positive sign.

Nice to see you Rara. Your child free break sounds lush. Hope you have an amazing time with lots of babymaking potential

Oh my gosh Buddha I think we might have to create a 'shagger of the month' award just for your feat of DTD x2 in a day! I feel heroic if I manage every other day

AF came this morning. [Angry]

It's not just that I'm not pregnant - I didn't think I was. But this is another bloody fucking shitbag short cycle - at 24 days. I'm going into my 7th cycle in 5 months now. I'm worried that theres something really wrong here, but the tests at the drs picked up nothing (or, at least, they didn't mention the low testosterone that the tests did pick up and whether that mattered or not)

I'm so fed up of this. Anyone thought about fertility testing privately? I just need clarification re what the hell is going on with my stupid body. We can afford to do tests perhaps - but couldn't afford to go down any treatment so part of my thinks why know when you can't do anything about it...But then this is driving me nuts.

VERY

Beastie that is shit, I'm sorry you're feeling like this. I think there is a thread on here for people with a short cycle www.mumsnet.com/Talk/conception/2664071-short-luteal-phase-thread-4
I don't know if anyone on there might have more advice? Hope something good comes from it

Ah shit Beastie. Sorry to hear that Can completely understand wanting to go private to figure out what is going on.

thanks - still annoyed.

it's seriously eating at my resolve not to drink after the holiday.

Sorry to hear that Beastie, would private tests ease your mind at least?

Beastie I'm also a short LP victim - 21/22 days - and also struggling to work out why. Nobody seems terribly interested in helping me find out why and whether it's a problem. I've tried Agnus Castus for six months and, although it has helped in other ways, it hasn't changed my cycle one hit...

Novino - I've also given DH marching orders! My favourite aspect of TTC is just how romantic it all is...

I know flutter! I have had to sweeten the deal by getting the agent provocateur stuff out. I'll be trussed up like this for the next 10 days. Going to end up with flesh wounds from this bloody stuff. Feel as sexy as roast beef. The things we do...

Thanks everyone - and really good to know flutter. It is probably because I start taking things like Ubiquinol (on the advice of the acupuncturist who seems to have managed to stretch my cycle - once - because I'm old etc). And these things obviously dont agree with me - knew Ubiquinol didn't, as my oestrogen obviously soured on it (I was getting flashing smileys for 5 days in a row, and felt physically very off).

But you're all making me laugh with the TTC comments.- very impressed that you have a stash novino.... and what you say is so true. I'll be back in the saddle in the next 10 days or so - maybe should try 'just doing it once ' - that always seems to get people pregnant in Mumsnet. My DH describes sex now as 'duties'. Poor DH.

sorry to hear AF got you beastie
I have have a short LP, but it doesn't seem to stop me getting pregnant, although I did have 2 MC before DS. My doctors don't think that the short LP had anything to do with it though...

Very impressed with your high levels of DTD!
I find TTC frustrating on so many levels: the figuring out when/if ovulation is happening, then the pressure to DTD (obviously not particularly romantic) and then of course of the waiting, and disappointment!

Ha Flutter you know it! Nothing says romance like a schedule.

Novino I reckon roast beef is pretty darned sexy If I actually fit into my AP stuff any more I would be wearing it too It was the inaugural outing of my birthday gift of AP undies that led to my BFP with DD though. Just sayin'....