TTC after miscarriage - lucky thread number 3

[Brenna24]

Still hopeing for 3x3 BFPs for this month. Hopefully thread 3 will do that.

It's so ironic isn't it waiting for a negative in order to get another positive. I couldn't have been someone who waited a few months before trying again. As it happens 3 months have already passed but it feels like an eternity and I really wanted to believe that I would just fall pregnant again quickly.

Yes temping first thing in the morning when I wake but within a few seconds I'm getting different readings. Perhaps it's the thermometer. My DP is confused he asked this morning I i'd taken my temperature as he wanted to know if we should dtd. Had to explain it only tells us after the event. Which probably seems pointless to him.

Brenna - feel your pain on parking tickets, got one myself This week. Sometimes it feels as if the world is against you.

You need an ultra-sensitive thermometer which reads to 2 decimal places. I have this one.

www.amazon.co.uk/gp/product/B002VF8EXC/ref=oh_aui_detailpage_o04_s00?ie=UTF8&psc=1

Mine seems to be pretty accurate.

Hope you get your new bfp soon clarity. I felt really jammy when i got my bfp last time as i got lucky quite quickly. I can't imagine i'll be that lucky again, so every egg counts!

Brenna just logged onto ask you how you are and saw your post. That is tough. The hormones will be everywhere too.
My cousin had her 12 week scan today she said it went well and I commented how it would've been exciting and she replied saying yes very. Couldn't help feeling sad for myself. Really happy for her though

I'm in another dilemma. I'm told I'm on track for promotion (team leader at mo but on track for 'manager'). They announce promotions in late January so if I fell pregnant now I'm sure they wouldn't give me it. I know they aren't supposed to do that but they've already said they can't make promises so that will be their get out clause. If I fall in a few months I might be able to hold off telling them until nearer January. Part of me wondered whether we should stop trying for a few months but after the miscarriage I don't feel I can make that decision. So I think we will keep trying but I'll try not to get too hung up on it and if it doesn't happen in the next few months I'll try and look at the blessing

Hi all, been lurking for a bit as I was away at a conference and then straight off to a family holiday at Center Parcs to celebrate my parent's 40th wedding anniversary.

for you Brenna limbo is rubbish and your day sounds like a nightmare. Welcome Clarity, been on the temping bandwagon since DD1, works well for me and so far have not gotten into opks or anything like that, as the CM, temping and DTD every other day approach is pretty much where I'm comfortable.
Cheeky, sad that we still live in a world where the timing of your pregnancy can affect your promotion chances, I'm not saying I don't understand it from a business point of view, but you still feel it shouldn't be that way.

Turns out I o'd on day 31 after my mc, just as I flew off to my conference, and our timing had been spot on, which is ever so good for growing up a good dose of hope after such a long wait (I've been having 48-52 days cycles before I got my BFP so every cycle is excruciating, especially as my LP is usually only 7-8 days). Then my LP went beyond the usual 7-8 days and my temps stayed up.....
But on OD12 - BAM! AF got me, which I can tell you is ever so much fun when you are in a cottage in Center Parcs, can only buy tampons in the only supermarket on site that aren't your own brand but you have to because you're spending a couple of hours a day in the tropical swimming pool thingie becasue it's your DDs favourite place ever... and your temps crash the next day so any hopes of it being an implantation bleed are quickly quenched as well.

So back to square 1 and time to start getting some tests done. Here's where I'm looking for advice, ladies. I went to the gp before I fell pregnant with my eventual mc who agreed that given I'm 35 and had been trying for nearly a year and my cycles seem to have suddenly gone from 29-30 days to somewhere over 48 and I've got this short LP, I should get some tests done and he said, next time I get my AF, come by for a blood test. Which seems a bit, I don't know, vague to me. Can I ask to be referred to a fertility specialist or do I have to do a certain amount of tests etc with my gp first? Because I kind of want to go to someone who knows what's what. Can anyone tell me how they started looking into things - through gp, or referred to a consultant or what? Keen to know where to go, want to feel like I'm doing something to at the very least get back to my regular cycle...

Brenna- thank you so much I didn't realise they were so affordable. Mine doesn't read to two decimal places so I will order the one you suggest.

Nittnat - I can't help with the GP situation, it must be so frustrating but your center parcs story made me smile. I had exactly the same thing happen to me last month on an Easter weekend away. Had a really heavy period arrive on the first day, which was depressing enough but hard work when you are spending days in the 'tropical pool'.

Oh NitNat that sucks. I can't tell you much yet but I went to my GP yesterday and we are starting straight off with a referral to the recurrent miscarriage clinic. I am phoning her the second I get a BFN to confirm this one and she is going to send off the referral she wrote while I was there yesterday. I could have kissed her for making it very straightforward for me. I'll keep you updated as to how things pan out.

You are welcome Clarity. Best of luck. I love a good graph, so mine make me very happy (weirdo that I am).

Hehe, thanks Clarity for making me feel that in all likeliness I'm not the only soul in that swimming pool walking around with an uncomfortable feeling about an odd brand tampon bought in haste! Think it says something about the power of denial in my head that I did not pack any (I packed exactly 5 pads) when about to go on a week away and AF is already due! Just lived in hope!

Glad your gp was so proactive Brenna, I'm seeing mine as soon as I'm back, but felt so relieved when I got my BFP after seeing him last time as he just seemed a bit unsure about how to set about getting on with things! Not that it will necessarily give me a better outcome, but might ask to see a lady gp at our practice... PS, I love me a good chart as well, I stare at mine a few times a day given the chance!

Hi nimnat. I am 35 too and after our 2nd MC we decided to go private rather than wait for a 3rd and then get help on the NHS.

We have got pg relatively easily twice but don't seem to be able to hold onto them. My consultant has done loads of blood tests to see whether I have hormone problems, blood clotting etc etc. All came back negative and I'm still waiting to see him to see what that means. I had a few complications after my surgery for my second MC in Jan which means up until last month I've STILL had blood clots in my uterine cavity so I haven't yet been able to see if we can get pg again. It's 7 months on from our first pregnancy and i am worried but all I can do is keep DTD and hoping.
Hope you get some answers soon.

brenna sending you lots of hope and thoughts.

Sorry nimnat I realise my reply wasn't helpful at all!! I would find out who the best MC specialist is in your area - or the best recurrent MC clinic - and asked to be referred to them. I was told it could take about 8 weeks to see someone but I would get your appointment through and then ring regularly to see if they have any cancellations. Become known to them and befriend their reception team. That's what I'd do. You could also maybe pay to have a consultation with a specialist, see what he or she recommends, then ask to be referred to that person on the NHS for any follow up tests? my consultant recommended we did this for certain tests that are v expensive.
Hope that helps.

Useful to know your experiences, if I miscarry for a second time I think I would consider private testing if I can persuade my other half.
This will sound bad but I do wonder whether the problem is more related to my DP, he was previously married and they didn't have any pregnancies after years of trying Whereas I have had children. I wish he would get some testing done at his GP but I feel bad suggesting this (or blaming him). He thinks the fact that I got pregnant the first time means that everything is ok and we were just unlucky (which maybe true).

Morning all, hope you're all ok.

Welcome mrsH glad you found us but sorry you're here also.

I can't offer any advice with the testing. When I had tests done they tested for certain autoimmune disorders mainly rheumatoid arthritis, lupus, Hughes syndrome and Graves' disease which can all cause problems with fertility and miscarriage, all came back negative for me. I know they do some tests for your egg reserves, I think that called the amh test and full blood counts. I also had my cervix tested for defects. Basically what they do there is they put weights into your uterus and see if the cervix opens up or not. This was all after a late loss 10 years ago though so it might all be different now.

So I caved and tested this morning and guess what? BFN!!! I can't even convince myself there was even a squinted on the IC I used! I'm either 12 or 14dpo depending on whether you want to believe my opk's or fertility friend. I've got cramps that are distinctly af, so I'll be surfing the red tide either tomorrow or Saturday.
Back to square one

So sorry amy have some hugs.

Thanks Brenna how are you feeling? Xx

Tired and a bit lost but not as much crying as yesterday. I'm in work again for a half day and had managed to locate my brain to do things. Yesterday I had to go and search for protocols to do the most basic part of my job .

Brenna, I really feel for you. Are you still bleeding? Is DH being good?

And I'm sorry too Amy. Treat yourself.

We need some good luck on here soon ladies? We bloody deserve some. Sending you all lots of thoughts and hugs.

I am still bleeding. I has slowed down a lot and is not pouring out of me like Tuesday but it is constant. I was very crampy this morning but that has eased off a bit too.

Hear hear kate. I'll second that. Lot's of luck to everyone.

Sorry amy and brenna. Thinking of you

Sorry Amy and Brenna, thinking of you both. Xx

Thanks ladies for the support with what now seems more clearly to be a weird period rather than implantation. Today is the first day I've felt normal rather than sick and fatigued, now feeling more like myself. I've decided to go back to basics with my supplements this month as DH blames them for the weird period. So now just taking pregnacare and raspberry leaf tea.

Cheeky just to do with your work promotion situation, I'm definitely taking the same approach in my life just now. I wouldn't be willing to take a break from TTC, and am just going ahead and planning and living my life with the view that if we do get pregnant plans will be tweaked to work around the pregnancy, if I'm not pregnant then I can enjoy being part of a still-fairly-newly-married couple for a bit longer. So we're going on summer hols soon and if I'm not pregnant I'll be going on wine tours, if I'm pregnant I can relax on the beach with a smoothie. Either way I'll make the most of what I have.

Brenna sorry to read your news, but glad your GP has you sorted with a plan. Hugs.

Brenna glad your bleeding had slowed down and you're feeling a bit better today.

Lucky had my fingers crossed for implantation bleeding, sorry it wasn't.

Thanks cheeky I was expecting a bfn.

Been wearing a pad all day expecting the storm to arrive but as yet I've had nothing, not even a spot. I'm extremely crampy though. If it's not arrived tomorrow then I'll be very surprised.
Had a busy shift at work. I've been really clumsy, dropping things and burned myself on the oven whist trying to cook fish fingers for a patient who had a craving for them! He didn't eat them so burned myself for nothing.

Finally heard some good news about the gentleman who's life I saved. He is almost ready to be discharged from the hospital! I'm so happy but sad at the same time as his wife passed away two days after he was admitted to the hospital so he won't be going home now. He'll be with us for rehab again whilst we find him a suitable residential home nearer to where he lives. He won't need nursing care once he's back on his feet and his tube feed is gradually weaned.

Good plan lucky. Just can't put our lives on complete hold for TTC but not willing to stop trying either. We haven't dtd much this fertile window. Only twice I think as we're still walking on egg shells after my rant to him quite a few days ago now. I can't really be bothered, so just focusing on myself at the moment. Work is busy and I'm still sticking to the 5:2 diet.

Amy - really hope you get a BFP - cramps can often mean your uterus expanding I think, getting ready to accommodate the bean!

The red tide has arrived! Cd1 and preparing for the shagathon to begin again. I don't think I can be bothered either cheeky though. Don't want it to feel like a chore.

Bummer amy. I feel like we ought to have a minutes silence each time one of us gets AF. It seems a reasonable measure of respect.

I am really glad your gentleman survived but I am so sorry he has lost his wife and won't be going home.

My bleeding had stopped completely so we DTD this morning and that triggered a tiny amount more of it. I am determined to be back in the saddle as soon as possible. This month will be our month!

Is there a new thread? Couldn't find it