TTC #1 after miscarriage - looking for some buddies

[Clareinthemiddle]

I have been ttc for 10 months. I'm 34.
Took it very easy the first few months and then went for it with OPKs, no caffeine, reduced alcohol and got my BFP in May, but sadly mmc at 12 weeks (a few days before my scan). The little thing had not made it past 5.5 weeks :(
Took July off to recover and then back on it again in August. Heard/read a lot about increased fertility the few months after a miscarriage so was really convinced August would be my month, but af arrived yesterday. Absolutely devastated.
Can feel a very lonely place, especially as I either have friends who conceived within 1-3 months, or those who always knew they would have issues so started with IVF a few years back and have thankfully all been successful. I guess I just thought I would have an easy ride, as my sisters did, but no such luck.
Thought it would be nice to share the journey with others dealing with similar situations or with success stories after a miscarriage. Please say hello :)

Can I join as well?

Like Ale, I've just had my second miscarriage in a row. Been TTC since August, got pregnant right away, mc in Sept at 6 weeks. Then got pregnant straight away again, no AF (think I ovulated & conceived on the day I was scanned to confirm mc). Had an early scan at 6 weeks, all seemed ok, heartbeat seen. But it seems the baby died shortly after that - was confirmed at 7+4 after a lot of pain and brown spotting turning to red bleeding. Had ERPC this week.

Not really sure what to do about TTC again. Part of me wants to crack on, but DH wants to wait for at least one period so my body can recover.

It's totally shit, Ale, isn't it?

So sorry for your losses ale and maud two mc's in a row must be so hard to deal with. maud personally I'd wait 1 cycle before ttc again. The support on this thread is amazing so you've come to the right place.

Clare I will book an early scan, doubt my gp will let me have one so I'll go private at around 8 weeks. CB has moved onto 2-3 weeks at 14dpo so feeling much better, as last time I got 1-2 weeks at 18dpo so I'm guessing there must be more hcg this time (fingers crossed). Still on progesterone and will be until at least 12 weeks.

Sorry for your loss Maud x

My heart goes out to you both Maud and ale. Wishing you a quick recovery physically. Hope your other halves are looking after you well.

Rhodes so good to hear your scan was OK, hearing heartbeat is another small milestone

I'm not sure I'll have early scan. I would if I were offered one by midwife but I can't convince myself of the point. Besides we are quite rural so the only private options are far away. Dating scan due Xmas week so not sure how that'll pan out. I'm fine just really tired which will be interesting next week on late shifts seeing as I can't stay awake past 9pm! Gonna poas again this weekend just to check. God the worry is never ending isn't it?!

hey Maud and Ale - so sorry about your losses girls, its heartbreaking reading that thus affects so many of us. This group is amazing though and I'm so glad I found them!!

Clare yes I decided to ignore as read that there's an indent on frers and opening them can affect that etc etc - so was no surprise to get a bfn this morning.
I am now in quite a grumpy mood, not sure if this means AF on the way, or if it's because I allowed myself to get a little hope.
I'm still having the same cramps I've had since 2 dpo (I'm 12dpo today) and still alot of creamy cm.

I know I'm not out until she shows, but I think I'm resigning myself to moving on to next month (without sounding dramatic!).

its great this thread has BFPs tho and I hope we can all still hang about and support each other through this journey xxx

Nice to know I'm still welcome Frankie, we all know how quickly things can change. I'm gonna stick around to see you all get your bfps and provide hand holding, virtual and light relief as required! Gonna try keep pregnancy talk to a minimum unless specifically asked tho as I know how much it can hurt when you are having one of those bad days (bloody Facebook is a nightmare too isn't it?). Hopefully we'll need a grads thread too soon if we get many more bfps? Or am open to private messaging.

Sorry for bfn Frankie. Not out yet tho. Chin up x

wouldn't be the same without you Sunday! and all you BFPs! even if it takes me months I still want to know how all your little rainbows are doing!

and thanks, chin is firmly up and I'm going to enjoy the rest of my weekend regardless! I did some reading up on dpo BFPs and I am by no means out!! so, I'm going to try and pick up a frer for tomorrow and see what happens.......xxx

hi maud and ale - i'm so, so sorry for what you've been through. you're both obviously made of strong stuff, and the universe owes you some good news - hope it's just around the corner. as everyone else said - you've come to the right place - there's lots of lovely people and good vibes here!

sunday so glad everything's going well for you! and glad you're sticking around, wouldn't be the same without you

frankiepants you're definitely still in this month! read this super scientific article about how 'evap lines' are a myth, a line is a line! (here if you want to read it: www.madeformums.com/forum/pregnancy/confusing-pregnancy-test-result-help/160517.html) so you're very much still 'in', i'd say...

Faint double line on opk today! In-sync with arrival of ewcm - yay!

yay Sophia!! get on it! (so to speak!)

Clara I can't seem to get that link to work........ xxx

Oh Maud and AleHouse I am so sorry to hear of both your losses. What a terrible thing to happen, especially after the joy of falling pregnant again so quickly.

My loss was mid October, and I'm still waiting till my body is ready to try again. Thank you Sunday for your response - how did you know it was definitely AF?

I read in to it and I think it was just that bit too early for mine to be a proper AF, and it didn't feel quite right, the flow was more like during the MC. There is still the possibility that it was my first AF, but my husband and I talked about it and decided not to take the risk this time. It stopped on Thu and I took a pg test Wed and it was negative, so it doesn't look like anything seriously wrong. Gutted to be waiting at least another month before trying tho.

I hope your pregnancies continue to go well Claire and Sunday. Sunday did you decide on an early scan?

Mascara I hope everything turns out ok for you. Has the bleeding stopped? If you're bleeding you should be able to get a scan straight away on NHS. If not how long would you have to wait for private? FX

Am I allowed to post where I've found a good deal on frers? xxx

iris I rang the epau when I started spotting again, also had bad cramps for 2 days and they told me to treat it as first AF. I was surprised as I was barely 4weeks after erpc. I can't say I was ready to start ttc again then anyway but it was reassuring to have someone in the know tell me it was ok to. Have you an epau you could ask? Much better than asking a gp.

Frankie yea! Let us know about frer deals! Ok sire we are all keen to hear! I bought my last ones on Amazon and they were about £4 cheaper than boots. Fine if you can wait and not use them both before af. I'm strict with myself on them that I won't use one until 10dpo unless an ic had any form of a line. It's a good rule to stick to!

Welcome newbies!

7dpo here!

I got ones from eBay but really should have got more, who was I kidding?! boots are doing buy one get one free.........and I have just double checked on their website and it includes the 2 pack! I got 2 of the 1 pack at £7.99 and thought that was a fab deal but I could have got 2 of the 2 pack for £10.49!

what an absolute muppet I am!

xxx

frankiepants sorry, you should be able to click on it here:
www.madeformums.com/forum/pregnancy/confusing-pregnancy-test-result-help/160517.html

and scroll down to roy's comments!

oooh, very interesting - thanks Clara! xxx

Hi Maud and Ale. That is terrible having 2 in a row.

Oh Frankie I hope that it is just taking a while to show up.

I ovulated a week ago, so I am guessing my first AF post miscarriage will be some time between next thursday to sunday (never measured LP before so no idea how long mine is). I really think we missed the window though. We DT on the Tuesday and I had OV pains and bleeding the thursday and friday. I had a temp dip on the friday, two dark OPKs thursday and friday and I woke up saturday morning with no ov pains. We didn't DTD until about 10 on saturday night. I suspect that I ov'd sometime between friday evening and saturday morning, so I suspect tuesday was too early and saturday too late. My temp has been up the since tuesday this week, so I am certain I did ovulate. Now I just want to see AF appear (although I think I will POAS by next saturday if she hasn't appeared. I don't know whether to hope she does turn up so we can find out when next month's fertile window is, so that we can tell whether or not OH is away, or that we actually got a miracle, which seems a bit too much to hope for and that I should be more realistic.

Oh, today we had a blessing on Rowan's ashes, then went out to lunch with a few friends and my brother, SIL and nephew. What a lovely lunch we had (we arrived at 1pm at the place and left at 5 - just a standard place with a soft play for nephew). There was just lots of lovely chat.

Brenna that's lovely to hear :)

Ale I will be keeping my fingers crossed for you all the way. The grief and pain of 2 mc in a row is very hard to take. But here's hoping that there is a happy ending for us both.

Thanks to everyone else for kind comments.

Brenna good to hear you had a nice day at your blessing - it must have been sad for you but sounds like you have great family for support.

another bfn for me, if I stare long and hard I can maybe see something but I think I am being more wishful than anything else. 13dpo for me, I feel totally out xxx