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Conception

When's the best time to get pregnant? Use our interactive ovulation calculator to work out when you're most fertile and most likely to conceive.

Original poster

Over 40s TTC & success stories.

999 replies

Grizzer · 18/07/2015 22:20

Starting a new thread for support & advice ladies. Not quite ready to graduate yet!

OP posts:
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11
joey38 · 13/08/2015 10:08

Hi Emerald Yes we are on a similar timeline, although I am about a year older than you - I will be 45 in about 2 weeks - eek!! Interesting that they told you IVF wouldn't be likely to work as you had conceived naturally as a couple. They told me that it was exactly BECAUSE of this that IVF might be successful!! I don't know about my egg reserve though - that will be one of the things they test for when I go back. I haven't had any pregnancies at all though since we've been trying for #2.

Did you have your consultation through the NHS or privately? I have been to the NHS clinic and found them to be much less enthusiastic about doing IVF. I don't know whether it's a money thing (although we would have had to pay there too) or that they just prefer to deal with more straightforward cases. I felt like the private clinic had much more ideas about what they could do with more 'challenging' cases!! Anyway, we'll see what happens. I really think that 46 is my absolute cut-off point, although if we do IVF it will probably only be the one attempt (I don't think we could afford any more!!)

notsoold · 13/08/2015 15:30

Hello all of you my lovelies!!!! I can't tag because I can't use this phone properly....
I am lurking but reading and keeping fx for you all.
Now 44 and still ttc here. My progesterone test was ok (she said better then average) and got an appointment with gp in September.
But I bit upset with the whole ttc thing and really struggling so back in lurking.... xxxx

Emerald72 · 13/08/2015 16:04

Fireflies what is ARGC again? You may have ready said so sorry if so. I have been thinking same thing; at 40 it seemed ok but 42 it's been s different story altogether. I was wondering if chances of success really do drop as dramatically in those few years post 40? Thanks for the info on cut off dates that's interesting.

Joey oh that is interesting! Maybe they told us that because we had got pg (though not successfully) a further 3 times quickly? And because my egg reserve is so low. It'll be interesting what the other clinic says when I go in couple weeks. My appointments have been private at St Marys, and Shehata soon. Can't wait for NHS they didn't fit me in till mid September! I think private they are prepared to do more, maybe it is a money thing?

Hi notsoold. it does get hard this whole Ttc, it can take over cant it. Do you have a dc already?

10000Fireflies · 13/08/2015 16:24

Emerald - www.argc.co.uk/ Also, have a look at the Lister clinic's results for IVF per age group. It drops to 1%...

10000Fireflies · 13/08/2015 17:14

Emerald have a look at this from the Lister: www.ivf.org.uk/treatments/pregnancy-calculator/

Emerald72 · 13/08/2015 18:00

Thanks fireflies will have a look

cloudjumper · 14/08/2015 12:09

Hi everyone! Just a quick hello from me - I'm still reading and rooting for all of you, but not posting as much.

Quick update from me - I am 20 weeks today and still baffled by the fact that this might actually really happen! Half way... This pregnancy is dragging on, I feel as if I have been pg forever. Scan on Monday.
All going well, this baby will be born just a few weeks before I turn 44 - don't give up hope, it is possible.

notsoold · 14/08/2015 12:38

Cloudjumper that is most excellent to hear from you!!! Halfway!!!! Lovely!!!

Emerald I have dd 20, ds1 16 and ds2 is 21 months old (had him at 42)..... thank you for asking!

Back to the corner ????????????

Emerald72 · 14/08/2015 17:15

Cloud that's great news you've got to the 20wk mark and hope after Monday you can relax abit more. It can happen!!

Thanks Notso can't remember if you'd already told me that or not so apologies if so.

10000Fireflies · 15/08/2015 01:10

Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to me, Happy Birthday to meeeeeee, Happy Birthday to me!! CakeThanks

Honestly, am not at all impressed about turning 46, but you have to embrace it, don't you? Feeling a bit nutty from lack of sleep I guess.

Finished prepping for guests later today, ie Sat pm. Cava is ready to go in the freezer Wine, I've made lavender ice cream to go with the chocolate nemesis Cake, x 2 palate cleaners are just about ready (pear and bay plus apple and rosemary if you must ask) Grin Come and join me if you're passing! Grin

I expect to feel horrible on Sun. Been on a bit of a carb-free, cleansing campaign since Tuesday's acupuncture. No booze for some days now. Will be back on the wagon on Sun, having read Marilyn Glenville's website the other day. Booze, however much, cuts your chances by 50%.

Night all.

10000Fireflies · 15/08/2015 01:12

Slightly manic waves to Cloud. Nice to see you on here again. Keep up the good work!!

10000Fireflies · 16/08/2015 10:42

Sorry to kill off the chat! Will get my coat...

Original poster
Grizzer · 16/08/2015 13:00

Happy birthday Fireflies!! FlowersWineCake & double congratulations for the Masterchef style feast you are cooking up. Very impressive. I'll be along later Grin

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FattyFishwife · 16/08/2015 15:34

Hi guys, sorry i havent been around for a week or so. Discovered (a huge shock and surprise) my nan had liver cancer less than 3 weeks ago (after being told she had a tummy bug causing her constant d & v and osteoporosis causing her back pain!!)

She wa stold to wait for an appointment with the specialist within 2 weeks, but her condition worsened and we had to have her admitted to hospital, to be told she had 2-8 weeks left. The day after, a macmillan nurse assessed her and she felt it was more like a week or less.

i had a holiday booked for last week and had to go for the kids (took our 2 youngest aged 12 and 5) as my mum wouldnt hear of me staying home, citing that I couldnt do anything to alter the outcome, and that my kids needed to make happy memories more than anything, so we went, on sat 8th

A week to the day that nurse assessed her, and less than 3 weeks since her diagnosis, my lovely nan lost her fight for life on friday Sad

throw into that a big fat AF coming, when i thought this may be THE month, so i couldnt even go in the pool or sea, and worst of all .....no possibility for a BFP for another month Sad

meh....gotta keep on keeping on havent you!

aaaand....breathe!

Emerald72 · 16/08/2015 15:50

Fireflies happy birthday!!!FlowersCake hope you have a lovely day!! 46 is not bad at all! AlwYs liked sound of even numbers better! Your feast sounds amazing will be round soon!

Fatty oh god that's awful about your nan, so sorry and what a shock. So fast like that. How old was she? Tough decision about the holiday too but think you did right thing to go, when did you get back? Big hugs. Life is bloody tough at times, but yes just have to keep on I guess. So sorry xx

FattyFishwife · 16/08/2015 17:42

emerald she was 88, so a grand old age, she passed away on friday, while i was still away, and we got back yesterday. I did pop in and see her on the saturday morning before we left, and told her i loved her, so thats a comfort to me.

lets hope the only way is up now, and that im graced with a BFP soon, as are all of us that are TTC :)

Original poster
Grizzer · 16/08/2015 18:17

So sorry to hear about your nan Fatty. (And AF). I agree with your mum, you were right to take your holiday with your kids. Hope you're doing ok xx

OP posts:
ababsurdum · 16/08/2015 21:07

Good evening all! I haven't had time to post but I have been lurking and waiting for a time I could post properly.

Fatty I'm so sorry about your Nan. It's lovely that you got to see her before she passed away Flowers Sorry too that AF has shown up. Fingers crossed for next month.

Grizzer & Cloud glad things are progressing well. Good luck for your scan tomorrow Cloud. It's such a relief when you get the all clear. I cried at all my scans except the later growth ones. (I was monitored for a low placenta and had an elective section which was fab!).

Notsoold sorry you are finding it hard at the moment. It's really tough, I hope you get your bfp soon.

Joey hopefully your baseline tests will go well. IVF wasn't nearly as awful as I was expecting. I had no awful reactions to the drugs which helped enormously.

Chewy happy birthday to you and your dd. I'm sorry about your mc. I have been too nervous to take dhea in the past after reading about the side effects. It does seem to help a lot of people though. Good luck if you decide to do IVF. We have ruled out de as an option too.

Fireflies happy birthday! How is weaning your ds going? Do you have any tips? I would well part of me would dearly love to wean my 19mo. Some days he only feeds once or twice but when he's out of sorts he wants to all the time which is very tiresome.

Emerald we are the same age - 43.5 although your ds is a year older than mine. When are your tests booked for? Are you ttc in the meantime?

Dh and I still haven't discussed things again though last night we did have unprotected sex (normally use condoms) for the first time since ds was born. I've likely ovulated too but don't imagine for one minute I will get pg since it took so long the first time. I'm not sure how I feel about it, as I've said I would love another but am scared of birth defects - I oscillate daily between thinking it will most likely be fine and we should just go for it and being worried. I'm also nervous about the impact on ds of another baby. He definitely is my pfb! Listen to me talking as if getting a bfp is even likely Smile

Sorry if I've missed anyone or mixed anybody up.

ababsurdum · 16/08/2015 21:13

I meant to add that I don't think my amh result was expressed in the same measure as some of yours. It needs to be divided by 7.14 to be comparable I think. Also it was more than 3 years ago so likely is much lower now.

Emerald72 · 16/08/2015 22:16

Fatty that's a good age for your nan, and good you got the say your goodbye to her at least. Well you know they say that when one leaves the earth another enters it.....

aba my tests are happening now and end of August. No we are having a break from Ttc whilst having tests, I don't like it as feel like I'm losing time but also think it's best to get the tests done and then try again. What are side effects of Dhea? I am thinking of taking it. And what's pfb? As in your son?

FattyFishwife · 17/08/2015 00:35

emerald funnily enough, my nan always said that. ..'one out, one in' ...so maybe baby dust is being sprinkled my way.
Thanks for the kind words everyone xxx

ababsurdum · 17/08/2015 03:05

Emerald here

Pfb is precious first born

It absolutely makes sense to wait while you're having tests though I understand the feeling that you are losing time.

Right, he's asleep again, I'm going back to bed...

Emerald72 · 17/08/2015 17:51

Thanks aba will have a proper read.

Waves to everyone x

SlinkiMalinky · 20/08/2015 09:52

Morning. I haven't posted in a long while but have been following at a distance. It's so encouraging to hear about the the ongoing pregnacies, you give us all hope.
I just thought I would check in to report a bfp! Boobs are reassuringly sore but very early days yet. It can get so disheartening when ttw ends with af again and again. I was getting used to the idea that ds would be an only child but perhaps not now. I just have to try not to think about it too much for the next few weeks, easier said than done! Lashings of baby dust for everyone waiting and hoping. Xx

joey38 · 20/08/2015 14:55

Congratulations slinki. Can I ask your key stats - how old are you and how long were you ttc before the bfp? Best of luck for a healthy pregnancy.

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