TTC after a MC (I'm really rubbish at thread titles sorry)

[DoctorDonnaNoble]

The Rules...

(1) A lady may only POAS on a Friday.
(2) Friday means the day that everyone calls Friday in the time zone where you spent the night.
(3) Rule (1) does not apply to POA-OPK-S, UNLESS they are being illegitimately used as surrogate HCG detectors, in which case Rule (1) most definitely does apply
(4) Rule (1) does not apply following a BFP because if you want to waste £25 a day POADigiS that's your prerogative
(5) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady is POAS in an attempt to get a BFN to prove she can start DTD with intent
(6) Rule (1) does not apply if a lady wants for unknown reason to pee on an actual stick, like a twig or some such, if that lady is unexpectedly caught short whilst tramping in the forest looking for bears.
(7) These rules (including Rule (1)) are subject to the change at any time if the ladies of the Posifrickentivity thread decide on a whim come up with empirical evidence to prove that it is luckier to POAS on any other day of the week
(8) Violators of Rule (1) shall be subject to fish throwing.

And as a grand finale, why not pledge to NEVER POAS before 14DPO?

Found it. Great reply Monten - she needs to be glad I didn't see it earlier when I was sobbing at my desk over 12 week scan due today. I would not have been polite.

Been 3 weeks since ERPC. I guess AF comes on anytime after 21 days and my normal cycle is 24 days so intrigued as to when it will arrive.

Still trying to decide whether to use opk's next cycle or just play by ear and make it more relaxed and spontaneous.

Looking forward to stay in a nice hotel in New York. DTD in hotels is always great. So it's about DTD in a nice hotel in New York and NOT making babies this weekend - and then fine we do nothing due to exhaustion of sight seeing and jet lag!!

Woo to cycle buddies sunbathing :)
I'm probably cd9 too to be honest. My first day was spotting late at night that was turning red by bedtime. Just put it as cd1 as I couldn't be bothered to decide then never changed it.
I don't know what my cycle will do. I ovulate late though and only have a 9 day luteal phase so starting early really.

Well, managed to dtd! Was worried my vaginismus would be really bad and cause us grief but it didn't too much Thank goodness.

Hi blink :)

I was thinking of you today brummie that must have been so hard with the royal baby bomb.

i have quite a lot of stamina (and I'm very stubborn) - this made me laugh!! You should have seen me on holiday, I managed to give myself cystitis .

Was it you metal who told us the story about wrestling your dh?! That made me laugh for days.

Gosh Monten, just read that thread and I am definitely cheering you on.
Some people...

Sunbathing, we are going to be bfp buddies! :) POSITIVITY :)

You ladies are so wonderful! It's SO nice to hear people thinking exactly what I do, and feeling what I do, and making me feel it's OK to be like this (and to be chubby...). I too freaked out when someone in the office decided to tell me about royal upduffedness (I work in Oxford and she was meant to be accompanying Wills to an event here today so everyone was talking about it). Kept it together. briefly. Then ran to hide in loos. Man, how much time do we spend in toilet cubicles these days?? I should start paying rent on our work loos, 3 months of MS spent down there and now all the hiding and crying...

Brummie sending you mega hugs from an ex-brummie. You're so brave even going in today. Cosset yourself tonight please. And everyone else too.

Thanks to everyone for being so lovely about stupid infection. Went to work today but went in late, and left a little early. A few patches of feeling grim but glad I went in overall. One day at a time, and keep taking the drugs .

Taking my chubby tummy to bed now . Sending lots of positive vibes.

Can't keep up with speed of posting (laptop being v slow and cranky). You make me laugh. Outloud, so DH asked what I was laughing at, saw I was on MN and asked 'uh-oh, it's the MN ladies, should I be scared?'

Go go go all those going away, out for dinner on a DTD mission

Just read your post Sunbathing, sending you massive hugs.

You ladies all amaze me with how strong you are xxx

Sending hugs to Dulcet if you're lurking too x

:) I don't feel strong but hey.

I've just realised, 4 months on.
It can't have been a blighted ovum. They saw a yolk sac. (I think that's right anyway).

Trying to go to sleep but my mind is whirring tonight.

Hugs Treaclepie, the realisations after mc are the worst. Give yourself some time to get used to things, don't expect too much from yourself.

Ha I just read the part about one of of you lovely ladies dragging your DH out of bed by the ankles to DTD, yep that's about the extent of our situation too. DH was very willing last month, I'm just hoping he'll be the same again this month. Otherwise that'll be the scenario, and possibly dragging out of the shower too, I'm a lunatic, clearly. I used to be normal.

Too right about the not DTD after having a baby, seriously, we'll be so fed up of it that a year without it won't matter :). Probably be a relief. Ouch Monten but good going! That's impressive :). I'm hoping I manage to avoid that but it's looking doubtful. I can't believe DS arrived after DTD just twice, I cannot imagine settling for twice now. Ah the good old days of innocence.

I'm happy I got some of you laughing :), my stubbornness makes my DH cry a little bit.

I've just eaten chocolate - I don't feel good for it at all. I've just spent an hour cleaning the house trying to work off the calories!

Thanks blink :)

Cd11 here. Weighed myself this morning. Need to lose at least 5lb very quickly!!!
Negative opk as expected but very excited and nervous to be trying again :)

Hehe, cleaning the house is a good way to burn off calories. Then again with all the sex we'll all be having we should be supermodels!

Well hello ladies, I have been very remiss and not posted since the last thread I don't think, life gets in the way sometimes! Also I never have anything interesting or different to add - just plodding on, still having weird cycles 6 months after my mmc - 6 MONTHS - just how did that happen??
I want to say welcome to the new faces and have managed to flick back a few pages and seen that lots of the familiar faces are still here and still struggling - it's shit isn't it?
It's going to be a bad few weeks for me, my due date is rapidly approaching and af got me this morning so absolutely no chance of being pregnant before the due date arrives. It's on my mind a lot (i.e. all the bloody time) and I'm finding work quite hard with pregnant joyful women all around. Actually there are only 2 of them but still, they can keep their joy to themselves. I feel bad typing that because they are both lovely but as you all know, jealousy and bitterness goes hand in hand with being a non-pregnant post-miscarriage woman.
My old antenatal thread keeps popping up in active conversations and stupidly I keep reading it. It was making me very VERY cross because as you can imagine it is full of people starting maternity leave and doing last-minute exciting baby shopping. However one of the ladies on there has just suffered a still birth. It has really hit me for six and I don't know whether I want to ttc at all now. I feel like I have just enough strength left to deal with one more mc (that's if I ever get pregnant again) but both of mine have been relatively early (6 weeks and 11.5 weeks) - to get to 37 weeks .... well, how do you go on after a loss like that? I'm feeling very much like I should cut my losses and start appreciating what I have already got. Not that I don't appreciate my 2 children, but I do feel like life has been on hold for the last year - maybe I need to start living again.
Sorry for the ramble!

Oh office, EDD's are always going to be hard. And I know what you mean about reading other stories and just being so............sad really about what pain people can experience. My friend got to 28 weeks when her baby was diagnosed with toxoplasmosis. I just cannot imagine the pain. We've all seen behind the curtain and we know bad shit happens. But I guess it's the risk we all take when embarking on TTC, or in loving anyone actually. Great happiness opens us up to great sadness. There is a Flaming Lips song called 'Do you realize?' - which basically is about how everyone you know will die. Which sounds totally despressing but it's actually very beautiful and uplifting and helped me a lot after my dad died. There's a line that says 'happiness makes you sad' and that is true. Hugs.

How are you getting on dulcet and lauren? Thinking of you both.

Can we talk symptoms ladies? AF is due tomorrow or the weekend. A week ago I had period cramps and thought 'Here we go!' - early cramps were my first symptoms both times I've had a BFP. But my boobs are not big at all. Were yours before your BFPs? Although mine normally are before AF now so perhaps the fact they are not is a sign?? Driving myself mad here.

treacle I think if there was a yolk sac then it is not a blighted ovum. Were you given a sheet when you left the scan with all the measurements?

Office don't go on your due date thread! That way madness lies. Mine keeps coming up in active too. And I see posters on other threads :( Sorry your EDD is coming up soon. It'll happen..

Awful about the still birth. Know of someone who had one recently too. 10 weeks is no fun but to go full term, I can't even imagine. It gives me goose bumps when I think about it.

Thinking of you office and I agree with ignominious that staying off the AN thread is a good idea - it's just so easy to compare and contrast what we've lost and to feel dreadful. I saw that the one that I was on has just become full again and they must have created another thread. It made me feel very left behind but I'm resisting the urge to find the next one! Could you plan something for your EDD? Even if you just take the day off work and do something chilled with your DH/DP so you don't have the pressure of work that day?

Brummie enjoy NYC. My husband and I went there to visit my brother in March and it was fab. My faves were walking the highline (an old subway line that has been turned into a park/walk above the city). Walking over Brooklyn Bridge into Manhatten is also awesome. We went up the Rock instead of the empire state which is cheaper and you can then see the empire state. We went up about an hour before sunset and stayed to see the sun set over the city which was very cool!

Tori I had a total misreading fail and a giggle as I read that you had to stop dtd every other day due to your OH having an enormous knobber rather than being an enormous knobber!

Have had a weird few days here. Enjoyed the hen weekend mostly but struggled a bit with the well meaning "well at least it shows you can have kids" comments that some people made. Having thought about it in future I think I'll point out that whilst I'm grareful for that, strictly it shows we can conceive rather than have kids and also at the moment our focus is on greiving for what we've lost. How to say that without sounding too belittling could be interesting!

Also have had first acupuncture session. Agreed to focus on regulating my cycle (which varies from 29 -42 days) and have been reccomended to try floradix (iron supplement drink) for a week to replenish my iron levels. Am willing to give anything a try!

Symptom wise think I might be experiencing some ovulation pain which would be good. When I realised I felt a bit guilty for not dtd more, but I think getting through the wtf cycle and trying more intentionally next cycle would work well with my headspace right now.

Lastly have found a cyst/lump/thing with a discoloured top at the very top where my groin meets my leg! WTF body? Went to GP who said he didn't think it was anything to worry about, take hot baths/apply hot compresses and come back in 4weeks if it's not got smaller/stopped being painful! At least I managed to persuade him to do my day 21 progesterone level tests to suss out if they lool okay! Now just need to get out of the wtf cycle to get to day 21!

Agree with the positivity... Even if I'm sometimes holding onto it by my fingertips it still helps avoid the dark swirly pit .

Well that turned into a bit of an essay

Morning ladies!

First post-ERPC AF just arrived (I actually did a little happy dance in the bathroom, I am such a weirdo) Bang on day 30 since the ERPC, I am feeling SO lucky right now! I was really worried it would take a while to come back. Explains the three huge spots which showed up on my chin over the weekend.

Poor DH, I am going to POUNCE on him when I see him next week, planning to DTD EOD plus I'm temping as I'm planning to give up booze in the 2nd half of my cycle, and generally try to be saintly. I know it's not likely to have affected anything but I'm determined after 2 MCs to do everything I can to have a take-home this time. DETERMINED! #pma!

Jesus Charlie that's such a strong pma I think you're going to get us all pregnant by proxy.

I'm going to count what I've got now as AF and start temping. If AF is cd1 and I'm cd5 now what day should I start? What thermometer have you got? Is in ear ok?

Grrrr how annoying! Just wrote a whole post but it's not posted!

office that's so sad re the still birth. Was it one of the September crew? I should have been due on Friday so I definitely would've thought I'd have been home and dry by now. Such a sad thing to go through. Did you see Ben fogle's wife lost her baby at 36 weeks recently? Scary that it's apparently common.

monten, I gotta find that thread. Could just about tackle someone complaining about their bloody scan not being perfect. Cow bag. If only we were in her lucky situation eh?

Well we are away on holiday and having a lovely time. I have a slight sicky feeling symptom, a sore right boob symptom and I just wretched at the smell of a cheddar and jalapeño bread obviously a symptom But I am not going to test until AF is due on Sunday.

Fuck me, I'm supposed to be working this morning but have This Morning on in the background for noise. It's all about pregnancy - fashion, doctor questions relating to pregnancy and kate!!! Might actually do work to avoid!!

Broody the thread is upsetting it just reminded me of my horrible scan. Horrible in that the baby didn't have a heartbeat, not in that someone wasn't quite Disney Store enough while trying to do their job.

Yes the thread is quite upsetting. The OP was just so rude, I couldn’t believe she just wasn’t willing to express any sympathy for others and acknowledge that her experience, whilst not what she wanted it to be, wasn’t actually that bad and apologise for her poor choice of words. Loads of people defending her when I think it was her, not others pointing out that she should count herself lucky, who was being very hurtful. It makes me sad that people can be like that.

office and broody I would have been due tomorrow so I feel your pain! Though I think for me the day I got AF and knew I wouldn't be pregnant again before then was actually worse, I'm not feeling particularly emotional about tomorrow. Very, very fed up with the whole ttc business though, I'm convinced there's a problem now so keep thinking what's the point of even trying... at least I'm having some tests done this month so hopefully will get some answers.

dulcet and lauren, thinking of you both and hoping you're ok.