Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Recently graduated from the mosh pit? Come on down to the mosh pit for some serious metalling and cake! Part ?

[backwardpossom]

Thought we could do with a new thread since the old one is full.

I think the high heels may need putting away for now!

I watched midwifes. dont usually watch things like that but it was interesting. I am getting special midwife care after suffering three mcs I think it will really help me.

one of my friends had just text and asked if I am pg. wtf. I told my friends not to ask as it means I have to tell them if I mc and I don't want to do that. what should I say?

i find it hard to watch baby programmes these days but liked that one as it was with people I identify with.

Erm maybe tell your friend that you are pg - but never ever want to talk about it until you decide to come out yourself. Awkward. I don't live anywhere near any of my friends so no one would know, luckily. Really it depends on who the friend is!

I told her I didn't know yet for this cycle (little white lie!) and said I will tell her if I am when I am confident enough.

the trouble is I hate telling people about mc. it makes everything a million times worse for me having over it with everyone.

this time I will tell the friends family etc at 12 weeks but will avoid telling randomers for as long as I can get away with it. having to explain to some bloke at work you have lost your baby is not something I ever want to do again. there will be no Facebook announcement from me!

aw pebs. that's awful. I had to email work about it and my supervisor who is a 70 year old academic, really embarrassing.

The thing with telling people was that I thought if I mc'ed I would want my best mates and family to know anyway, to help me. But actually they didn't know what to do with themselves or what to say which made it worse. I felt hugely on show. If there is a next time I would rather be much more private and keep it my special secret. I didn't realise how much of a loser it wouold make me feel too.

Anyway I blab on! Coming out at 12 weeks will be fabulous fun for you!

I'm with you pebs and wilde on the public MC thing, I think it's a real problem with later MCs, it's hard to be 4-5 months and not tell anyone or have anyone guess. And even harder when they do know and they discount your baby/pregnancy later on. Everyone's forgotten about my lost ones because I'm pregnant. But I still lost them and they should have been here. I should have my 5 month old boy on my knee right now but I don't, I have a 9 month girl bump and a lot of uncertainty still to go through. I know I'm lucky to have the bump but it doesn't replace my lost ones. And it's hard to answer the questions day in day out - is it your first/second....oh I bet you're bored of being pregnant now, it's so long at the end isn't it - and you feel like saying yes but I've been pregnant for months and months longer than that. Then questions about the age gap and all the awful insensitivity that just generally comes with people.

Yuck.

Anyway pebs rest up and get better. lurcher hope you're doing fine. mum it's normal to metal, just let it all out here!

Hadn't heard of the midwives programme might give it a watch.

you will probably catch it on iplayer. last nights was a good one for us.

the specialist mw mentions that people like us have been pg for a very long time. I first got pg two years ago and I have a long way to go yet before I have a chance of a baby

Runs in licks MissC to celebrate TERM. TERM? TERM. Blimey. That is amazing. I am not that far behind you - just 7 weeks to go. Runs out again to watch Midwifes on Iplayer.

I am a bad mother who still wears heels at 31 weeks - must look like Miss Piggy

hehe bet you look ace midget :) I can't wear heels even when not pg, am a converse and jeans girl through and through. Doesn't stop me buying them though and i do love to wear a heel at a wedding And when did you get so pregnant?! I tell you, other people's pregnancies just fly by

miss congrats on reaching term hurrah! so sad to hear about your lost ones. :( I wrote letters to my mc baby so one day when I am dead and gone someone might find them and know about the one that died (hopefully singular). no one in this lifetime is likely to talk to me about it again.

aw pebs today you are pregnant.

I lick you Wilde, I am watching last nights Midwife programme. It is actually breaking my heart in two. This is perhaps not good fodda for a metaller. The poor lady with kidney failure and Holly worrying about dropping cheese on her belly. Sometimes I forget how bad the losses we experience can be for our partners. I for one was too busy focusing on my own sadness to give it much thought..... I am not sure i should watch this again.

Evening all, quickly popping in to say hello.

Had another scan today, my 4th, I'm now 22+4wks with a very happy healthy active baby, who refuses to open its legs feeling more secure by the day, but then have moments of blind panic and fear, all in all getting better, and dare I say it, excited.

I watched the midwives last night, I will warn you, the 17yo diabetic will make you cross, I hormonally cried and ranted at her ignoring the midwives concerned, it seems especially bad when showed up against, the lovely lady who was worried about dropping cheese on herself, I really could relate to that, I thought she was lovely! And I was very envious of her knitting skills! The lady with kidney failure broke my heart, I really hope her baby is home and well now!

I feel like I've been pregnant forever, my first mc was july 2010! I've been hoping and waiting since then. I love being pregnant (when not metalling) and want it to last and enjoy it, But I also wish it to go by fast some days so wrigglers here in my arms safe. Its confusing and something no one but you lot understand.

Anyway! Big for mrs and midge for being so pregnant and an extra cheer for mrs who is term!!

Hope everyone else is well xx

eek sorry midget! the other progs in the series are just about midwifery in general. I thought this one was an interesting episode, like the forum it sort of normalises one's post-mc wierdness... and seeing people go through such difficult pregnancies sort of made me marvel at the process I suppose.

feel reet bad! sorry!

Oh state we understand. wilde don't feel bad - nobody made me watch it and miraculously they all had positive outcomes. It was hard viewing though but did give me some perspective. That is a good thing.

This will sound crazy but I have birth certificates for my lost ones in my documents box with the rest of the birth death passports and stuff.

I made them myself and printed them, loosely based on a regular birth/death certificate. With their names and sexes and places of birth and their scan pictures and post mortem reports. So they are there in the world, a bit. Even though they never counted legally.

And yes I'm term. Term and a bit - nearly 38 weeks

pebs you always have a chance of a baby. Long way, yes, but a long road travelled already and many hurdles overcome! It's not easy to have the gestation period of an elephant but it proves we are extra tough.

Congrats on the scan state excellent news!

Might watch the midwives later.

mscoffee, pebs, I agree with everything you have said about pg announcements. I felt like i had to tell everyone i'd ever met, and it was truly horrible.

I completely get the birth certificate thing too msc, I think there is such a need to have tangible things to mark that they were here, only for a short while, but that they were loved and part of our lives. In my town cemetry, there is a section for infants, (so pregnancy losses, stillborns and children up to 3). My little boy is there. There have been times when I wondered if I had overracted in insisting he was buried, but at the time it was the only way I could make sense of having to go through that shitty labour, and now it is a place where I can go and remember him. I don't talk about it to many people, and I find it hard, even on here, but it helps me immensely.

I cannot watch any tv, because we've just moved house and have no tv or Internet on computer, just mobiles. But I am pleased there was a programme on mc, because I have been feeling more and more that there should be more general knowledge about it among society at large, for many many reasons.

hi all,
thanks jaffa that's lovely to hear about your friend. I am almost at the point of giving up now, if it happens then lovely, but otherwise I don't think I can put myself through much more.

missc term! that is bloody marvellous . I shed a few tears reading about the birth certificates, that is so beautiful.

hiya midge great news all is good for you and bump. Heels??!! At 31 weeks?!!? Good grief you are made of stern stuff! I can hardly wear heels when not pg!

hi wilde good luck for this cycle!

pebs all good news, fx this is the lucky one.

state, my DD wouldn't open her legs on scans, even though I was desperate to know whether she was a boy or a girl. I said at the time, looks like I'm being outwitted by her/him already, hope this isn't a sign of things to come. It so was, she is the boss now as well!

hi to everyone else,

tas my 3.8yo dd was exactly the same, and just like yours still outwits me now, I'm mildly concerned at the idea of two of them!!! Plus ds who's quietly pulling the wool over my eyes and I'm usually oblivious! Ah its all fun!

missc I understand the certificates too, they were here and they count, and you have something to show for it. I really wish I'd took a scan picture from my latest mmc, but I was numb, and not really there if that makes sense!

Our hospital has a memorial garden and all babies from erpc/mc in hospital or terminations are buried there, I want to go, but I'm waiting, I will take wriggler when we leave hospital, say my final goodbye, and thank you for what I've learnt and for making me love this baby and my big two more than I ever imagined. When I'm having a good day I can see the things loss have taught me, and not just taken!

Ladies I haven't read back as having a mad dash crisis and need advice. Forgive me but TMI alert.......

I'm day 13 of my sixth cycle since mmc and haven't ov'd yet in this cycle but have had, sorry, milk???? Is this my body's idea of a sick joke or something odd ????

polka that happened to me on my second post mc cycle, as convinced I was pg because of it! sadly not, but know you are not alone. Our bodies are super weird.

am moved to hear about how you remember and mark your losses. Our babies were real.

thansk for the luck tas. am convinced I can't have popped an egg this month, my hormones are all totally up sh*t creek. But will pretend along with FF and say am 4dpo. Already planning my massive wine fest on holiday next month though when this month disappoints!

oh and we cross posted yesterday - congrats on the scan state!

ffs. really near pos opk today! reckon will be pos tomorrow going by my other fertile signs! so longest cycle in the world. why body, why?!

Poor DH, I hope he has some stamina left after this month's marathon so far!

chuh cannot WAIT to ovulate! will have totally skipped august for this cycle! could it be because of the CP does anyone know? :(

Just poking my head round the door. (Remember me?)

Sorry, the thread has moved on far too much for me to name check everyone.

I've been very busy trying to ignore this pg, deal with the potential move to the US and then dd's nursery has been closed for its summer break to keep up with everything here, but I have been lurking.

Anyway, just coming up for air and to say that I have my 12 week scan tomorrow! Gulp I'm not sure how the time went so quickly. I'm getting a bit nervous that it will be another mmc, so will probably go to bed early, but could go with some reassurance and virtual hand holding.

lays out homemade chocolate chip cookies

Mmm cookies! Good luck tomorrow, confused - let us know how you get on yeah? Mine's a week on Monday (I'll be 13 weeks) so we must be due about the same time?

I'm exhausted today. Been back at work for 2 days and can hardly keep my eyes open! Heartburn has already made an appearance. I'm feeling rough. Early bed methinks.

Good luck for tomorrow confused x

Good luck confused - hoping you get a wonderful view of happy healthy little one.

There's a lot for me to catch up on, but I'm a bit shocked for lurcher - as if this isn 't stressful enough without being told something's low when it's actually fine! Err!!

Had a dream last night that I started bleeding - think it might be a subconscious acknowledgement that I'm reaching six weeks again...

Good luck confused x
Lurched try not to worry easier said than done I know
Glitter I know how u feel I'm 5 weeks today and consistently been woken at night by terrible dreams of that nature

I'm also worried that taking the cycligest is only masking a failed pregnancy. Dreading my 6 week scan but in a way glad I should find out. Can't even think worry about beyond 6 weeks yet