Rainbow Babies - hoping and trying for rainbows, loving and remembering our Angels xxx

[Ellypoo]

Hoping this thread brings us all luck and hope xxx

hugs amyboo I was terribly upset last autumn as my Dsis was asking me lots of questions about ttc and that she still wasn't pregnant after trying for like 3 months! She then fell pregnant in November and although I was very pleased for her, I was also angry that she got pregnant before I did...
Got over it now though, just hoping my little godson will be ok and my sister too...

amyboo Ive had a similar feeling the past few weeks, my bff has moved back down here after living away for a few years, she has three of her own, all conceived very easily it is like all she has to do is look at a man and she falls pg. She doestn have a house, shes shacked up with three kids in her parents house in one of the bedrooms. He husband is just about to move down, and give up his job to do so. They do have a rental house in the pipe line, so she says to me the other day that they have been thinking of having another one! Coundnt beleive it. Why! Why! Shes got really bad PND for a start as she conceived her last dc three months after the birth of her other dc.
Its so hard when everyone else seams to be able to get pg, have a healhty baby even when they dont look after themselves. We try so hard.
My good friend in the states has one dc, she is desperate for another kid, and we talk all the time about how unfair it all is that otehrs can but at the moment me and her cant! Its so frustrating, but I guess we just have to smile and try and carry on with our own lives, there news doesnt really affect us, our situation is totally different, and ours will get better Im sure of it.

amyboo I know how you feel, My sis announced her pregnancy to me by text message a few months ago. I am happy for her but also very upset at the same time. She does bug me though, every fb update she makes is a moan about being prgnant.

fan keeping my fingers firmly crossed for you. I'm usually a really light sleeper and wake at any noise so it's less of a worry in that sense, I don't sleep very well though!

whatever sorry to hear about dp's mum :(

amyboo when we were ttc Ella it seemed that everyone other than me was getting pregnant, it wasn't a nice feeling at all and I was very upset about it. It's all normal though ime xx

blizy it makes me sooo cross now when people moan so much about being pg - I had a hard time of it when I was pg, SPD and constant exhaustion, and I feel constantly guilty now that I didn't appreciate it fully. I would give anything now to be pg, and of it meant beD rest for 9 months, if I had a healthy baby at the end, it'd be worth it.

Grh...... Saw a pt yesterday who was a proper arsey cow kicked off at me as I d kept her waiting for her appt 50 minutes I apologised but ad I explained to her I deal with pts who are unpredictable & sometimes they need more time than others ... Anyhow she was virtually shouting at me how stressed she was as she is 30 weeks pg ..... !!!! I started to take her medical history when she was kicking off again " she 'd only been 3 months before why do I need all this info again?" I explained as her medical history could have changed, developed new drug allergies etc.. In the end ( after I had offered her a glass of water etc) I showed her to an exam room & had to get 1 of my colleagues to examine her before I said something very unprofessional to her!!
Every time I asked her why she was stressed her answer ; because she was pg.... How I didn t hit her I don t know?????
My friend said she was really quiet & subdued I m glad she picked on my vibes. I thought about telling her about Georgie then thought better of it as she wasn g important enough to know about my Georgie. Later found out she is a trainer Social worker ffs !!!! Fits perfectly!!!
( sorry if any of u are social workers , don t think u are but in my experience they re a highly strung bunch!!!!) she fitted the type to a tee!!!!
But , there was so much I wanted to say to her..., but then realised she wasn t worth 1 second of my time....

Thanks for all your support ladies. It is hard because she's my closest friend and has been helping me loads since I lost Thomas. I just hope I can kind of ignore the pregnancybthng and not let it get to me too much.nshe was so apologetic in her email, I actually felt bad for he s she clearly didn't really want to be telling me if you see what i mean...

Sorry to hear about that horrid woman angel. I don't think I'd have managed to stay as calm as you!

Amyboo, it somehow makes it harder by email if you ask me, because the onus is then on you to react in some way. I hate when people give me that kind of news by email.... S

Ellypoo, I'm trying to not test early, but I'm feeling v. Premenstral, so I think it would be a waste of the stick anyway!

Orion...i don't know how I'd cope with having another boy, well I do, I'd be over the moon, but I want a little girl soooo much. I feel guilty about it, but not that much tbh. I can completely see how you'd feel like that. I think when you've had your little one those thoughts will go though, don't you?

Blue... How is your sister doing? Hopefully it's just a dinky baby. Preeclampsia is one of the most common reasons for iugr, are the keeping a close eye on her urine and swelling and BP do you know? I expect they have done a Doppler scan and checked the placenta function and fluid levels... It's so hard because you don't want to worry her, but it's important that she is monitored too....
I'm not surprised you are finding June difficult...may it rush past for you!

Cheese... I'm glad your little girl is feeling a bit better. It's horrid when they are unwell... Sorry wed was tough for you. I can't believe 8weeks has passed since Merryn was born, so I can see how a year would feel even more unreal in some ways. Taking flowers for Sterre was a lovely thing to do...
I fed both my boys for ages and co-slept too. At the time it felt like forever, (but i did love it), but its over now and I miss that time so much. I can't believe my boys are 10 and 5 this year!!

Whatever... I had csection at 32, and Merryn would have breathed on her own! (had the steroid jabs though), all my (many) consultants considered 37weeks term, and would not worry at that point... I think it's fine, really try not to worry. (as if, but try anyway)!

My oh half has just said we need to leave house in five minutes, and I'd only replied to half of you..... You lot can talk!! I'll catch up with the rest later. We are off to test drive a car.... Hoping dp isn't going to get carried away and spend our holiday money on it.... Hmmmm!

Lots of typos.... Oops.

I'm in a foul mood, not sure why. DH hasn't been well had food poisoning. We are going to a bbq this afternoon and then he's going out with mates. I don't really want to go now, and feel like picking a fight with someone. I don't feel like I'm pregnant, just feeling really annoyed and fed up and down today. Don't really want to do anything and feel on the verge of tears.
At the bbq will be all his work mates just can't be arsed to be nice to people, I'm just not in the mood, but I know DH will be disappointed if I don't go. I'm kinda hoping the weather was going to be really bad , but at the minute it looks ok.

Morning girls,

Fan- I'm sorry your are feeling rubbish, maybe you will go and have a good time?

Angel- that patient sounds like a complete a self entitled nightmare.

Ingot a high reading on my cbfm this morning, very surprised as I don't usy ov until cd 17. Wonder I the reading will stay high until then?

Sorry I haven't replied to everyone, I'm on my phone and can't look back (sieve like brain).

Hope you all manage to have a nice weekend.

Blizy go girl!!! Cx
Fan if you lived here you d be ok!!! It's chucking it down!!! Go , drink wine +++ always helps
Amyboo hope u re ok? Thought I'd tell you my story as a pure example of how selfish & short sighted people are. Not meaning your friend is but some people leave a LOT to be desired!?!!
Hope all are ok? Crap weather here, Phebs grizzling ( sorry I m whinging) xxx

fan if you don't have to drive, can you just go & drink wine?

Weather is pants here too. Just been swimming with DSis & BF which was hard (bf is 21 wks pg), but it was ok - she is going 2 try to get another scan done privately when she's about 30 wks after what happened to me and because I said that I wish I'd had another scan, maybe they would've picked up on her growth if they had. Said i was sorry she was scared because of Constance but glad if it made her more aware of what can (and does) go wrong.

It's my friends angel babies 1st birthday today and she is doing a balloon release later at the time he was born so I hope the weather picks up for her.

Hello all, sad to see all the health concerns on here at the moment. Sending positive, strong vibes to whatever and DP's birth mum, blue and your sister, cheese and Ella, angel and Pheobe, and fan. I guess we are all so aware of how fortunate (and mercurial) good health is, and how many other people seem to take it for granted...

amyboo you sound totally normal to me in your reactions to your friend. It is hard and unfair and awkward - but I don't care if others feel that way. (As Angel once said on here, if that is the worst friends feel, well, that's tough... I have lost my gorgeous Mia, which is infinitely worse.) I met a friend yesterday who is 23 weeks pg after having twins two months before Mia was born. She is the same age as me. Fortunately, a mutual friend had told me she was pg, so I was ready. But you do always feel a tiny bit jealous as others stroll down that lifepath you anticipated...

blizy that sounds promising, even if it is earlier than normal! FX for you.

fan sounds like DH will appreciate you going along with him, and hopefully the 'virtue factor' of doing something nice for him will improve your mood? Maybe just sit quietly with a nice glass of wine. And if you don't want him to go out afterwards, maybe you can suggest that he doesn't, and he will be open to that? I know what you mean - we are off this afternoon to a BBQ with my friends, and it will be the first time I have seen them since Mia died, and the effort required to be normal or to be whatever they might expect from me is rather challenging.

angel your story about that lady made me smile... obviously the only person in the world ever to be pg!! Known a few of these myself. I can only hope that she gets over herself soon.

orion I know precisely what you mean. I think I would like to have another little girl - but if I say it out loud, and I find I am having a little boy, then I will feel so guilty about this new little person... so no idea if we will find out at the 20-week scan or not. I know another little girl would never be Mia, but still...

green thank you for such lovely words about Mia. And - I was wondering if I might try to put together a little story for you and Merryn for you to illustrate? I am not a professional author by any means, but I did a sort of a fairytale for Mia a few months ago on my thread called the Princess of Smiles, and I have some ideas for Merryn which I'd love to work into a fairytale for you and your boys.

Hello to all others on the thread !

Elly- hope the weather keeps up for your friends.

Angel- have you painted a stone yet? We stone searching this morning at a local business park and bought some acrylics. Hoping to get get stuck into it tonight or tomorrow. Dh will be doing it as I am a crappy artist.

Mia- i hope your BBQ goes well.

mias I hope the BBQ goes well, I know it can be hard to see people that you've not seen since your life changed so suddenly. I find it's usually easier than I anticipate.

fan I hope you're able to show face for a wee while, have a glass of wine them maybe leave early? My dh is out tonight too and it's the first time he's left me at night since Jude died. I'm all sorted though, got crisps, sparkling water (major craving) and Alien on sky+. Now all I need to do is stop myself from reading sad stories online.
Fingers crossed blizy x
green I think I'll get over this need for another boy because deep down I do know that 100 boys won't make up for my wee man. I just need to get to grips with it. Did you end up with a new car?

Got a 22 week cardiac scan on Monday so that'll be another tearful trip to the hospital. I hope it's all okay so far but I know that Jude's condition wasn't diagnosed or even spotted until he was five and then only 3 hours before he died so this scan will just be one more hurdle on a long journey.

Just got back, went for a couple of hours, it was ok but there was a little girl there about the age of what Fi would be now. DH isnt feeling good but has decided hes still going out, I said to him just go out for an hour or so for your friends birthday and then come home your not well. He said that he may stay out not sure depends on how many people are there he might have to stay longer out of politeness? Weirdo, he always says this, oh I had to stay out of politness, its polite to stay right till the end of the party when they are packing up ready to go home. He so doesnt get it. I kind of hope he pukes in a minute so I have to pick him up, it will show him that hes a bit of a twat and needs to look after himself a bit better.

Im feeling abit tearful, keep thinking of my babies, I should be pg with bungle looking forward to my booking in appointment. Damn you body! Ive got lower back ache at the minute, but trying not to think too much of it.

green Scarlett was my baby :) but yes it was nice. My others are 10, 8, 5 and 18 weeks. She hates her medicine!

fan when are you due to test? Was it Monday?

Felt really odd when I was out just before, totally spaced out. Home and feeling better now though so might have been too hot. Had a jumper and coat on in tesco!

cheese I will be testing on 19th, so a week and a bit away yet. This weather is terrible to dress for isnt it, the wind is chilly but really its quite warm. Its very easy to get dehydrated in this weather.

fan no idea why I had Monday in my head, hmm . Yes, it was freezing earlier but then the sun came out a bit and it was too warm. How are you feeling now?

a bit beter cheese still a little tearful, Im watching the football and gettign tearful that The Netherlands are not scoring [Sceptical] I really hope these are signs, if not its quite depressing

and Im an idiot for not getting the smiley right DOH. second time lucky

Just on for a rant, what isn't with people (practically strangers) asking "will you try again"? I hate it! "try again" implies that I failed with Zoe. I wish they would mind their own business and keep noses out!

FFS. Meant to say what is it! Bloody iPhone!

blizy I get this all the time too, but not from strangers from people I work with and they look at you like it will solve all your wows. They have no idea. or they say 'you are trying again though arent you?' and when you say well yes, they say oh good, like it will make things better. They are all wankers! Excuse me for swearing.