Just MC and ready to try again? Pregnant after MC and seeking somewhere safe to hide? Jump in the mosh pit for some serious metalling or settle yourself down in our padded cell. All welcome! (Part 19)

[Poppyjen]

Another new thread for some more serious metalling - we really are a chatty lot!

Here's to making it through the WTF cycle(s), metalling* like a teenager from the early '90s in the 2WW, BFP colds and other classic symptom spotting and hiding in the (nice and comfy) padded cell post BFP

If you have miscarried and are ready to TTC again, come and join us!

• For those currently wondering what our mosh pit antics have to do with ttc post MC, a fabulous typo in an earlier thread resulted in "mentalling" becoming known as "Metalling" - a far more fitting expression I am sure you will agree!

Welcome!

manda Thanks. It's weird isn't it. One moment I am wishing he'd open up to me and tell me how he actually feels and the next when he does, I totally panic. I think it's what you said, I need to stop seeing as my job to make him feel better. There is a thin line between feeling responsible for cheering him up & ending up feeling guilty when he doesn't. Thanks for the strenght doest a Popeye impression

Evening Peepsicles!

manda my lunch was indeed scrumptious! I was taken out by a company that does a lot of work for us and I had (this could be a total outing if anybody I know reads this but it's too good not to share!) ..... starter was =butternut squash gnocchi with chestnut salad, main was seared halibut, cauliflower piccalilli and pommes mousseline and pud (could only eat half!) was chocolate millionaire?s shortbread with banana tuille. It was very posh! (I copied it from the menu, we were at the Paula McEwan restaurant which was the runner up in the Grampian restaurant of the year :)

But when I got home all I wanted was chip shop pickled onions (the very sour ones!).

It's our m/c baby's due date this Friday so DP & I are going out for lunch then I think going to get a nice angel bead for my pandora necklace.

bauble I had the same OV sticks. I could pee away to my hearts content without thinking of the £ (!) I would usually back up with a Clearblue Ov stick when I was sure I was near OV. Some people swear by the CB Fertility Machine thingybob but they are £60+ plus sticks! Ouch!

maja it's good your DH is being so honest about his feelings, my DP kind of shut himself away for a while. Have lots of cuddles and as bauble says enjoy lots of the things you can do before your baby comes along (because it will!)

IQ I think a couple of times a week at your stage is bloody good going!

mseltoe how old are you (if you don't mind me asking?)

baby so sorry to hear about your Grandad xx My Granny is back in hospital, she's 92 but my dad says if she gets out then she can't be left on her own so he and my Uncle will need to take it in turns to stay over, thankfully we are all only mins away. Hugs xx

I've alot at today's threads about the gorgeousness of manda and her DF! :) :)

bugs That's cool! I'm definitely buying the jiffy bag tests next time. Re: DH. You are absolutely right, I just need to find an evening when none of us is so fucked off that can't gather the energy to leave the house and reach the pub. We were suppose to have a bit of a night out on Saturday (wedding anniv) but he got so depressed that we kept it quiet.

Hopefully the Christmas break will help! Plenty of opportunities for indulgence then!

How is work going?

I'm 27 pie

I'm just a baby at the school gates. I get looks like this

Don't worry I them back.

Oooooo mseltoe were the same age - I've not done the whole 'school gate' things as this is number one for me but I think I'm going to be an 'in between' as there are lots of young mums round here.

Still jealous of your twice a day antics - one of my past hobbies was seducing my DH but the fact my stomach now looks like a "giant malteser" (his words not mine) mean that the logistics of such seduction are difficult, add to this my back and hip pain and its a bit of a start/stop affair. I suggested we buy some sort of winch but he just looked at me like I can't see what his problem is - i think it would be great !!!

maja I agree with the other ladies - you need to take it easy on yourself and so does DH. MC changes how you look at yourself, your life, your priorities - you will get back to really enjoying each other on a fun and intimate level. DH hadn't really spoken much about things and I was talking about going for an early scan in this pregnancy. He said that he was scared of going because he never wanted to experience the pain of looking at a blank screen where a baby should be ever again. I think at that moment it sort of hit me that in a way he had been holding it together for my sake and how hurt he had obviously been by this experience.

The next couple of weeks are a great time to snuggle up, have some nice food and drink, just think of each other and encourage that spark for each other meant you wanted to start a family in the first place. Hugs to you both xxx

Hi all, another quick one. Grandad died at lunchtime today. It is horribly upsetting but also, weirdly, a relief. I will write more when I can string a proper sentence together, at the moment I am a bit jittery (if I was not pg I would probably be half pissed!)
Thank you all ever so much for the kind words, xx

baby I am so sorry to hear that. My thoughts are with you and your family. Look after yourself.

I am sorry baby I understand - be gentle with yourself and take it easy, it'll be a while before it sinks in. I hope you have good support.

oh baby that is so sad - I know exactly what you mean about it being a relief, watching someone you love suffer is totally heartbreaking so knowing it's over does bring a sort of relief.

Thinking of you and sending you and your family my thoughts!!! Xxx

Thanks all.
I can't sleep so am trawling Ebay for baggier clothes to take my mind of things! It's replacing the fact that I can't drink loads of any wine! Did have a pint with a large lemonade top though, trust me it was very needed!

so sorry to hear your news baby, take care of yourself and your family. RIP baby's Grandad xx

Very sorry to hear your sad news, baby you and your family are in my thoughts.

Morning all

Baby so sorry to hear about your grandad. It is always very sad to loose someone you love, my thoughts are with you all and I hope you have a peaceful christmas. Try to remember that when our loved ones are poorly it is no life for them and focus on the good times and love you always had together x

oh baby i am so sorry about your grandad, i totally understand about the 'relief' you feel, we had that with my nana in January. I am sending you and your family lots of love xxx

IQ your 'giant malteser' made me smile hopefully one day i can be a 'white chocolate malteser'

OK so is it too soon at CD13 to be metalling? i have stretchy pains in my tum and have sore (.)(.)s (well when i prod them that is!!!)

baby just logged on and seen your news...so sorry to hear that. Hope you managed to get some sleep last night...

pie To my head, that lunch sounds divine... yet my stomach/appetite is going 'meh'. Gah. I don't smoke, rarely drink... one of my true vices pleasures in life is indulging my inner foodie and eating out at wonderful restaurants. Just eating in general; love it! DF thinks it's so sad that one of the things I got such joy from is kinda a chore now. He often remarked in our early days how he'd usually finish off his dates' meal... yet I'd scoff all mine and be 'tasting' his, plus wanting dessert (even if I couldn't quite finish it!). Plus, just like Joey in friends, he now knows 'Manda doesn't share food!'. I will begrudgingly let him taste what I have - the emphasis on 'taste' - take too much and I will I'm also very protective of my dollop of ketchup if I have chips. Well, he seems to gouge half of it away with one chip! He knows better now, though

One of my loves is pate. And I know it's morally abhorrent, but OH! for some foie gras this christmas. My arteries are sighing in relief, I'm sure, but bloody hell it's the closest to the craving I get and my sensible head (and worried heart - heaven forbid anything happens to baby now but... I couldn't live with myself) won't let me. GAH!

InsomniaQueen Thank you. It helps to know that others have gone through and got over the same.

Erm, ladies. I'm afraid I've fucked up & need help. I miscarried 3 weeks ago and was planning to take my preg test to get an 'all clear' BFN this week end (been having brown discharge till only a few days ago). There has been some DTD in the last few weeks....anyway, I thought I would take the test while the pasta cooked (as you do) and imagine my surprise when a very, very, very, very, very thin second line came.

I know I should have tested earlier just in case but because of the brownish discharge it seemed unnecessary.

I'm 99% sure it's left over from mc but how do I find out for sure??? Do I just take a test every day for the next few days and see if it stays or goes or what?

I know, I'm such an idiot. I think I just didn't want to face the BFN before and now look what happened.

Hi maja I would buy a twin pack of the CB Digi tests, do one now and one in a week to see if it increases in no. of weeks pregnant. It took me nearly 7 weeks to get a BFN but everybody is different. If it was only 3 weeks ago it might very well be left over hormones, especially with the recent brown discharge but you never know! So, either a CB Digi or go and get your HCG levels checked a couple of days apart? Good Luck! xx

Thanks Pie- I got up at 6 am and did another test and the line is pretty much gone (that whisper of pink may very well be a figment of my imagination).

I just feel so stupid. Of course I want BFP, but a real one. Not one an anorexic one that's going to make spend the Christmas holiday as a jittery mess to then turn out to be left over hormones.

That CB Digi test is a great idea by the way!

Now I'm bleeding. Body obviously gone mentalist.

Maja so sorry things are so confusing for you - welcome to what is now known as the WTF cycle - it is so hard to know what your body is up to for a few weeks after MC, for most ladies on here it took a good while for things to settle down ( IQ is an exception though of course )

I have no specific advice other than to say see how the bleeding goes and test again when it stops.

Have a hug - it is especially tough at this time of year I think with all the emphasis on happy families etc.

Just about to make some mince pies - with mincemeat made by my DS (with a generous dash of help from my dad!) so I'll pop back later to tempt you all with the virtual version

I reckon I am 6DPO today, and really I think that this really must be the best time of year to have a 2ww - my mind is totally taken up with prep for going to in-laws tomorrow that I haven't really had time to metal at all!