Ahem..
- Do you like gin? (This is compulsory, you must say 'Yes')
Yesh. Hic. (it's winter, the sun never gets over the bloody yardarm in the first place)
- Men - are you a gold digger or a cradle snatching cougar?
He's both older and poorer than me. Husband jackpot FAIL on my part.
- Baybee-making - to put a baybee in your tumtum, which hole do you use:
a) weewee
b) poopoo
c) foofoo
d) none, you just pray to the baby Jebus.
c. Though if some nutter on a random website tells me that a combination of a, b and d was definitely what worked for her then my knickers will be off before I've even shaken hands with the priest. So to speak. .
- Testing - when someone wonders if they should test for updiff (pg), do you:
a) bellow 'POAS!' at them non-stop and punch them repeatedly in the kidneys till they wet themselves anyway.
b) Sprinkle them with babydust and send them hugs and kisses on lickle baby angel wings.
a
- Is R2D2:
a) an adorable robot from Star Wars.
b) the source of all evil.
Not a new wonder drug that will make me updiffed or anything? No? Better be b then.
- what colour are your walls?
White. And scuffed.
- Number of pets?
3 cats (do not. say. a word). Also some goldfish which might in fact have died. Though they are brown goldfish in a brownish pond, so quite hard to see even when alive.
- Inappropriate (read: weird) crush of shame?
Brian Cox. Geeky scientists do it for me every time. Runner up crush is Eugene from Big Brother 9 
- Lesbian crush?
My doctor. I even have dreams about her.
- What are your views on camping?
Love the idea, and make my boyfriend strap all sorts of heavy tent stuff to his rucksack. Then when we get there decide it's a bit chilly and lead us both straight to the nearest plush hotel.
- How much money have you spent on sticks you then urinate on?
i) Oh nothing, I'll probably catch first time and then get the doctor to confirm it.
ii) Over 100 quid
iii) I opened an account on ebay solely for the purpose of purchasing sticks
ii) The Waitrose cashiers are starting to look at me pityingly before I even unload my basket.