Mourning our angel babies but still hoping for the future: let the swi commence!

[TooImmature2BMum]

This is a thread for those of us on the bereaved mother's thread who want a place to moan about the perils of ttc without upsetting anyone over there. We've gone through at least one pregnancy, and we know what it is to hold a baby whose eyes will never open, or to have lost a baby after a few days, weeks or years. We know the fear, but we're going to go ahead and do it anyway. And then do it again, especially in the middle of the month!

Newcomers will be welcomed with all the hand-holding and wisdom we can summon up - and that's a lot! Come in and join us: the door is always open.

Cheese I know about the nervousness, I'm on a night out with my best girl friends tonight and am going to tell them. It seems really early to be telling anyone but figured that this time round I'm going to need mucho support!

STOP SCRATCHING! Feel better soon and hope all you ladies have a great night x

wow cheese congratulations! its sad really that now we just cant sit back and enjoy these pregnancies without the constant worry of it all going soo wrong again. i keep thinking i am getting pains in my left side and keep thinking what if its ectopic again (i think i am imagining these pains though) then checking for bleeding every hour - i am driving my dh mad!

those mosquitos sound nasty and hope those bites settle quickly for you

Morning. Massive headache again. Did another test and it was darker so I'm pleased! Fingers crossed for everyone else this month. Really praying this one sticks.

Mel I'm so tempted to tell people as well. Told my parents and dh's mum so far but that's it.

Shakey I went to sleep last night thinking I'd be bleeding in the morning. Every time I feel anything I'm worried. I'm trying to relax a bit though.

Going to drs on Monday to get referred back to the hospital as that's what they said to do.

Hi ladies, told the girls last night and they were so thrilled for us. First scan a week on Friday so hopefully all will be ok.

I hope you get lots of support now you've told them. Is that a private scan you're having?

No, it's at the hospital. We're under the care of the Fetal Medical Unit and it was them I had to phone when we got the bfp. Apparently we get dealt with as a problem pregnancy which although an annoying label, it guarantees us better care. I think we end up getting scanned every 4 weeks or so x

Ah ok. I was told by consultant to get referred back to them right away when I got pregnant so I'll be requesting an early scan when I go too. I was told it would be a high risk pregnancy and heavily monitored, need to have a GTT at 20 weeks I think and then another at 26 or so. Scanned more frequently and early inducement. I really don't know what to do about that though, I know some women request a c-section but I'm terrified of the thought; I'm more terrified of the same thing happening again though but as it wasn't during labour I just don't know. How do I know what the right thing to do is?

Hi ladies,
Hope everyone is well. Lots of luck and sticky baby glue for those with bfp's x
I have been out for the day with my neice, we had a lovely time, the weather is lovely here today, hope it stays that way as we are waiting for someone to come round and pave our back garden. Can't wait to have a lovely garden to sit out in.
How is everyone? cheese has it sunk in yet? Sounds good getting a stronger line today, fx for you xxx

Hi all hope you re all well?
Cheese. as you know my story's very
Similar to yours lost Georgie at 41 weeks last October and now 24 weeks pregnant
With GILS ( known by many as Georgie' s little ickle sister!!!) if I can say anything to you , apart from the obvious again , CONGRATS , is I ve found the best way to stop myself metalling is take 1 day at a time , each stage in steps. I even wrote myself a list and broke it down to stages ie;
BFP
First scan at 6 weeks
Scan at 8 weeks
Etc... You get my drift ??? I still don t partlcuraly think of the end " prize" as on s take home baby yet and I ve only 13 weeks to go before my elective section. Hopefully your medical care will be as good ad mine I ve had scans from week 6 every 2 weeks , luteal support twice a week and aspirin
( as I did with Georgie) , scans now every 4 weeks with consultant review after, I see my MW every 2 weeks and I do my own MSU's and HVS's via work every 4 weeks.
But as my old mantra says that has helped me a trillion times over " for today you are pregnant" xxxxx
Congrats again to Melmal
Hi all hope it happens for you all soon xxx

Congratulations, Cheese! Yay! I'm so pleased I'm actually getting a little teary here! That's such good news.

Dachs, your bites sound awful - has the itching stopped yet?

No news from this end. I'm on CD23 and as far as I can tell I haven't ovulated yet (based entirely on absence of EWCM). Maybe I am gearing up for another 7 week cycle [hhmm]. If nothing happens this month then I am going to buy opk sticks for next month, or one of those Clear Blue thingies.

Oh, and yes, Green, shoe shopping is definitely the best therapy! In fact, any shopping is good. I have bought a Primark T-shirt for £7 and I am ridiculously happy with it. DH has bought a sofa and is happy too.

Did just that on Friday! Sitting here wearing my lovely new blue sparkley but comfy sandals and my £3 new top. At least it takes my mind off Af which arrived two days early today. My life sucks but at least my sandals rock! Think I'll try to see doc, 26 days seems short. Is it?

too The itching has stopped but the bites are still massive and really ugly looking. Doc said all of them will leave scars. DH didn't get one single bite! Grrrrrr................

Thoroughly approve of shopping therapy [hgrin] Was going to do some myself yesterday but couldn't face baring my legs in public so decided to carry on hiding in the house.

I'm on CD 17 now and based on previous 28 day cycles I should have ovulated by now, shouldn't I? OPK has said no every day so far (and I've been testing since CD11) but I've always had trouble getting a positive on them anyway. I'm not very good at the mucus identification thing, so I'm not sure whether to jump DH or not. Any advice?

In the words of the advert - Just do it! xx

If ever in doubt dachs jump away! I got a positive on an opk one afternoon (ic) but was negative in the morning and negative again the following day. I think sometimes especially ic's are not sensitive enough and so you need to be spot on catching the surge. have you tried tesco ones? I find I get a second line on them which gets darker over a couple of days till its positive, good because you get a bit of warning before the positve so you can get plenty of swi in!

I wanted to shop today but had loads of unexpected visitors and by the time they left it was too late.

horsey sorry the witch got you, maybe you just ov'd early? after I had my little boy I had a 26 day cycle but i was using the cbfm and ov'd really early. no harm in checking with the doc though x

ciwi not really! I keep looking at the tests in disbelief! Glad the weather's been nice for you today

Angel That's a really good idea, it seems such a lot to deal with all at once. I'm calling the gp tomorrow morning to get the ball rolling and I'm hoping to be seen by the hospital fairly swiftly and get some early scans too. I've said that myself a few times that, "right now I'm pregnant", I think that's the only way I can look at it. Can I ask if you were offered an elective section? I really don't know what I should do about that.

TooImm Thank you! I'm pretty sure I ovulated really late as well so don't give up hope! It's odd that the month I decided to buy the monitor, test sticks and bought some new clothes for summer that I got pregnant. Keeping my fingers crossed for you. Fwiw, I didn't notice much EWCM at all.

Horsey Sorry your AF arrived. I don't think 26 is short in itself, it depends on cycle length and how long your luteal phase is. If you're regular then that's meant to be good.

Dachs yes, yes, definitely do it! If it's hard to spot ovulation (like it is for me) then try every other day around when you "should" be fertile. I went mad and made poor dh do it every day for about 2 weeks!

still tired and have a headache most of the time but I'm pleased as I can feel it, if that makes sense. No sickness but I never really do get that, eating lots!.

Hope you all get BFP's very soon :)

Hi Cheese I was offered a section at my follow up appointment with Georgie as part of my plan for " next" time. I wasn t really fussed either way I had Georgie naturally and quite happy to do it again however, I m Group B Strep + on my HVS so I m having IV benzylpenicillin pre op and a section to rule out any risk however minimal. I rung EPU at 4 weeks , this time I found out VERY early at CD 20 and they booked me in for a scan at 6 weeks with a view to start luteal therapy straight after as long as they saw a Sac, which, obviously they did and surprisingly a heartbeat. Rest up xxxx
Love to all xx

thanks for that. xx I've been very down this past week. Keep seeing twin boys EVERYWHERE at the minute - from babies to 2 gorgeous boys with red hair about 8 and then 2 six-footers on FRiday! It was the boys with red hair which really shook me - ours probably would have had red hair too. First period was 28 days, next 2 were 27 and then this one has been just 25 days. I think I'll try to see doc just to ask. Probably just need to be TOLD that it is a natural variation. Hope all keeping well.

Morning everyone, can't believe it is Monday again and I am in work AGAIN! feels like I live here.
horsey know what you mean about needing to be told things are normal. I went to the GP because i was bleeding around ovulation despite reading everywhere that its normal. Gp told me it was normal and I feel so much happier now - lol
angel what is luteal therapy?

Hi girls, hope you are all ok.

I think im on the 2ww now? Ah well time will tell

horsey i am l ike that too when i see a baby, child with Downs sydrome. Always wonder if thats what Zoe would have been like.

Hello all!

Well, the SWI is failing spectacularly. I have offered to go back on the pill until DH sorts his head out, but he refused. He has been referred for counselling now though, so hopefully that will help. I really hope he clicks with the counsellor and allows himself to be helped a little. I don't imagine he will explain this issue, but even if he gets some of the rest of it out it might calm him down. I am miserable but trying not to show it.

Bizarrely, though, I felt pretty sick this morning! I am trying to convince myself that shagging on CD 8 and 10 probably wasn't sufficient and that people can feel sick in the mornings just because they are actually ill, tired, hungry or still hungover from Saturday or obsessed with getting pregnant and having fake hysterical pregnancy symptoms. Even if I was pregnant, surely CD 24 is too early for morning sickness? My boobs don't feel full or tender, which was my first sign last time.

tooimm I hope the conselling works for your DH, that must be tough.
I was thinking about when I fell pg last time and it happened when I started to exercise and not obsess about it all. So maybe as your DH gets into the councelling and starts to sort himself out maybe it will happen. Its better to be both in the right mind set, otherwise it could lead to worse things.

Maybe the sickness is anxiety? I used to get this when something big was going on like moving or new job or swi.

too sorry you are having trouble with the swi. It's really common after what we have all been through and I am sure in time things will settle down. Maybe tell your OH that you will take a break from trying as such and just swi when you feel like it? Or maybe a little surprise weekend away?
If you ov'd really early (which isnt that out of the question) you could be feeling icky on day 24. I felt sick before I even got a bfp last time (don't want to get your hopes up though) but fx for you anyway xxx

Thanks guys. Green, we were planning to start jogging today but somehow it hasn't happened. Will try to run tomorrow - I think you're right and exercise will help. The consultant advised me to exercise because of the natural highs it produces, and we reckoned what was sauce for the goose was sauce for the gander.

Ciwi, I hope so!

Hi all,

Went to Belgium for my sister's wedding, which was absolutely fabulous! When we drove over there a beautiful rainbow appeared in the sky! I thought that must be a sign that evening I asked DH if he brought our condoms... which he didn't. So we did some swi
I had the feeling I was ovulating, but haven't had any AF yet since giving birth... ah well we'll see how it goes!
hope you are all ok! love x