Just MC and ready to try again? Pack your cake wine and tightie whities and join us for more ranting weeping and most of all laughing! All welcome! (Part 9)

[DachshundAntlersRule]

Had an mc and need some wine, chocolate and somewhere to moan and cry? This is the place to be! We chat a LOT so it can be hard to keep up, but everyone on here is great and will hold your hand until you get your BFP.

dachs of course I don't hate you for your decisions - you and DH have to be sure of your methods and how far you'll go down the AR route.
Your plan C sounds totally sensible to me - me and DH regularly talk about what we would be able to do with one child as opposed to two. Although I don't think it makes the disappointment any easier when the path you want to go gets closed off to you, it does mean that you accept the disappointment for what it is - being pushed down another path, and accept that the alternative path is also a life worth making the most of. Thanks for being so open.

wombat oof, it's so hard. I really hope that it does last, you at least deserve the chance to get past the first hurdle seeing you have a whole race of them to jump.

Pink oh no! That's the horrible lurgy...cough is awful. Take care and take it easy. Am so jealous of that woman though, it's my idea of bliss.

apple, caribou, lovely to see you - roll on 2011 I'm sure we'll all be joining you in grads before the New Year is out.

And with that said...have a lovely night one and all, and see you in 2011. CHEERS!!!!

happy new year nice ladies!!! Hope you all had a lovely evening last night! I thought I'd post this
link, partly selfishly so I can find it again but also in case anyone is thinking about testing as it has some interesting thoughts, especially around HSG where they imply that if it shows a problem, there isn't necessarily one, and if it shows all clear it can't be relied on. So sounds a bit rubbish really!!! Will defo be calling the clinic for their thoughts when they're open again.

Morning all...

owlie you will be fine lovely xxx its horrid and its scary and i lay on the scan table with tears rolling down my face scrunched up in a ball of terror whilst the sonographer looked for it for what seemed the longest minute in eternity.... but when she says "babys there, theres a heartbeat" you will relax instantaneously xx

AR glad you are ok lovely xx

wombo how are you babes?

Izzy are you ok too?!
mama hope you got royally sozzled and mummy that you arent getting too sunburnt

dachs each to their own re adoption, i will not pass too much comment on that one as my DH is adopted so for me its a different arguement. But you have to be really desperate to become a 'mother' to a child regardless of from where it came, to adopt. His and his parents/sisters life has not been without ishoos, so i do understand! Also, you dont get babies nowadays! My friend eventually adopted 2 girls with ishoos and has had nothing but heartache with the older one.

Hope everyone has suitably fabulous hangovers, except those incubating a little bean, I am still sat in jim jams and so

Morning all oops afternoon now and a very happy new year to you. It's been a week since my Christmas Eve MC horror and I'm feeling positively human again. For the first time I actually feel as though I can face life again. I still think the next few months will be pretty tough but I'm glad I've found such a lovely place to get some understanding and support.

owl I am not surprised you are terrified - if I ever manage to get pregnant again I think I will have to take myself off to a desert island with a book of sudokus for three months to stop myself going completely mental. Lots of positive vibes coming your way.

We are off to see the PILs then for a night in a posh country hotel to make up for the Christmas we never had. Will add myself to the list next time I'm online. Happy 2011 everyone!

Happy New Year lovely ladies!

hope everyone had a good evening whatever you were up to. I manage to guzzle a whole bottle of port ontop of the usual champagne so got a little bit sozzled. Had a lovely time though. Of course I got all excited this morning when my temps shot up before realising that all the alcohol was probably to blaim for that rather then a little bean. Ho hum.

nix I am so glad to hear everything is looking good for you. Fab news

big new year hugs to everyone and may it be a great one for us all!

Also wanted to add for wombat, you are temping right? Your temps will tell you what is happening re the little bean.... if they stay above the coverline thats good....

maybe I'm just bring over sensitive but an adoptive mum isn't a 'mother'-she's still a mother to the child, just because she didn't give birth doesn't invalidate that. And I don't think it would make you desperate. Thanks also for the pointed reminder that I'm not incubating a bean Sorry, it's probably me that's out of line, just feeling a bit shit about new year, no new 'effing baby and just found out dh will be away during the critial swi week and due date this month, marveloso.

pink are you ok, lovely? I don't think anyone's saying adoption is a bad idea, but different people do feel very strongly about the routes that they would or would not go down to have a child. A close friend of mine is looking into adoption and she would be fab, but on the other hand has strong views about whether or not she could cope with egg/sperm/embryo donation - it's a tough decision to have to make and I don't think there's a right or wrong. Obviously adoptive parents are real parents too, I dont think anyone would disagree.

Sending big (((hugs))) your way and hoping you're doing ok - new year, like Christmas, is a funny one for making you reflect on all that's happened. I think I'm just so relieved to be out of 2010 that I haven't really thought about it. I really hope this year is better for all of us x

Thanks izz I'm ok. Reading back I was being a bit mental, sorry nix. Think it'll be a bit better once january's done but literally all my friends are now pregnant or excitedly trying for their first. I know it's not a competition or a race but I'm really worried we'll end up being the ones left behind-will have been trying for a year next month :( also have been stuck in rellies houses for a week now with no gym or yoga to keep me sane so have just walked to tesco just to get some fresh air. Might try and convince DH to go for a walk with me later-so need some exercise but we have both got the most disgusting lurgy imaginable so have been moping around with far too much time to dwell....

Urm wasn't directed at anyone pink.... Either comment. It's a very sensitive subject hence I abstained from comment initially living with a family whom have experience of adoption. Being an adoptive mother or mum in our experience is no different, but to those who wouldn't adopt, wouldn't do it for very specific reasons. My mil adopted two children after her son died in infancy and she then had a twin still birth. Her overwhelming desire to become a parent was driven by not being able to go through that again.

As for the incubating bean comment, I hadn't realised I was being insensititive - sorry if you felt I was!

I think I will go now...

X posts xx

Sorry you feel rotten, poor timing re dh :(

Sorry nix I was out of order I really should step away from the phone when I'm feeling pissy at the universe in general. Just had a good cry at MIL and feel much better now. Will you forgive me if I promise to be better behaved? I will try very hard, i promise. So sorry about your MIL, that is such a sad story :( xx

Hello and happy new year to you all. Big hugs to everyone. The beginning of a new year it tough when you're wishing things could be different isn't it? I'm keeping everything crossed that this year will bring better things for us all.

I'm away for ny for four days in the middle of nowhere (no phone reception so I'm on a hill now) with 4 friends,. One of them arrived and announced her happy news. I'm delighted for her but it.s tearing my heart out. I'm totally convinced this bean isn't working. Temps still above cover line but no boob pain or other symptoms and test lines are getting no darker. Fainter if anything. Just wondering how long it will take before I miscarry this one. Might start looking into testing too as I don't know how I'd bear a third loss. In my mind this one is already lost. I hope I'm wrong but in my heart I feel I know. keep hiding myself away to sob quietly.

Aww wombie sorry you're having a shite time. Temps still being high sounds like a good thing. Maybe try a digital test or a FR when you're back home? That way it will have been a few days since you last tested and hopefully you'll see a big difference in how strong the positive line is. Huge (((hugs))) am thinking of you xx

Afternoon everyone, happy new year and thank you for all your help and support in a time when have never needed it more. Here's to a fresh start and a batch of new year BFPs

Pink (((hugs))) sorry you are in such a dark place, I really hope that this year brings better news
Re adoption, it's a tricky one and my heart goes out to anyone in that position. Before we started ttc, we discussed what we would do and we both had different views about using donor egg/sperm or adopting. So I think if both of the couple can agree then that is all that matters

Wombat when did you say your scan was? Oh I do hope it's ok

The brochure for my scan arrived yesterday, which put me at ease a bit, as they will arrange onward NHS treatment if needed, so if the worst happens I don't have to leave and ring around

Sorry for not saying more, I hope everyone's doing ok?

Bring on 2011 and the BFPs

Now to catch up following hangover recovery (think that probably answers your question nix - got fairly happy on bubbles has everything settled down now sweets?):

Sorry for xmas quickie post and wanted to offer individual welcome to all our newbies, Hadrian, Ochaye, jiggle, wellie, fred, Dolly and Zam as I said before I hope your stay will be short but in the meantime I hope the banter and support will help you through.

Owl good to hear all is well, that bean must be nice and snuggled in by now. When is your scan?

Orange think you also have a scan coming up, hope it goes well and when is your scan nix?

Wombat keep thinking positively hon, big ((hugs))

If you're lurking Sunchild sorry to see you go and that the ole biatch showed up for you and Kat

AR How are you hon?

Pink get over here and hold my hand, we'll get through January together and take one day at a time from there, including returning to exercise and good healthy eating!!

Izzy you always support everyone else but how are you my lovely?? I don't think YRMOTB has surfaced (must have been a good chrissy and new yr or perhaps she's busy SWI ) think you'll have to start the new fred and we can let Baubles do the next??

Just a new yr reminder that fish slapping is perfectly acceptable on this thread (actually positively encouraged in some cases), so behave or I'm going to the market to get a big fat trout to start brandishing around!! Mwahahahahaha!!

Waves to Choccy, LadyB, Hiding, Tunnocks, YRMOTB Velvet, HKBaby, Tigger, Loola, Hairy, Dachs, Kat, Mouse

Well I did vow a massive catch up... Happy New year gang xx

Happy New Year everyone! I've been offline for a couple of days and have missed so much.

pink - I hope you're doing ok. There are times when things just get unbearable aren't there? If it's any consolidation, my DH was away at the critical time when I fell pregnant with DD1. You just have to go for it all around about the time he's away .

Brilliant news about your scan Nix. Put your feet up!

owl and wombat - I hope you're managing to stay positive lovelies.

hiding - a whole bottle of port!!? That's truly impressive .

From earlier in the thread, I just want to say I think it's definitely harder to cope with an mc when you haven't got any DC's. It's hard no matter what, but when you have them to distract you, I'm certain it takes your mind off it at least.

Well, I'm failing miserably to successfully take my temp every morning. I keep getting woken up by someone needing my attention then I forget and before I know it it's too late to get a sensible reading. I'm hoping to get more into it when I'm back at work and being woken by my alarm. I also still have a faint bfp which is frustrating.

Well hello my lovelies! God it's been ages and i've really missed you all! Hope you've all had good xmasses and New years. I have been as mamap said, SWI'ing, and being sloshed in equal measure.

So sorry to see a gang of newbies here, but nice to meet you all, I'll try to catch up with you all personally over the next few days but my head's up my arse somewhat today!

nix lovely news on the scan. pretty and wombat congratulations! wombat try not to worry my darling, easier said than done, I know..

izz how are you feeling? Our new year detox starts Tuesday, hey? I'm gonna try 3 months not drinking, see where that gets me (other than pretty bloody grumpy)

hiding I think I may have emulated your New year, but a bottle of port is very impressive! I have drunk a litre of Jagermeister

here is the shiny new thready who's with me?

I promise i'll be back to prolific posting status in a day or two. just need to recover first.