Feisty, Fabulous Forty somethings

[galwaygal]

This is a continuation of the "More ongoing and continuing conceptions and follicling ahead of Feisty, Fabulous Forty somethings"

I thought I would keep the title short as there are so many long ones out there.

I thought I would start the new thread so that you don't forget me

Just a quick message for jolls and louise. I don't want to be a scare-monger at all but I felt I ought to just mention it to you two.

A lovely girl on the charting thread that i occasionally pop on to lost her baby recently. She got to 20 weeks but found out that the baby had stopped just after her 12 week scan. Obviously a horrible horrible shock. She had to deliver as it was too advanced for an EPRC. Anyway, the post mortem showed toxoplasma (sp?) and she is now wondering what to do about her cats if/when she gets pregnant again. Although she doesn't have any proof that they caused it.

The only reason I thought of you both is cos you have both said at times that you have cats - (plural) and so does she.

I just wondered if you had both had test for toxoplasma when you had your MC's and your Still birth louise.

It may be totally irrelevant but I'd hate to not mention it and find out it was actually very relevant.

Let me know anyway. I only mention it cos you are both lovely and I want the best for you .

hi all - feeling gutted as nothing appears to be happening to my body post m/c...

loving all the shagfests

home dyed my hair tonight in preparation for a party - not sure its a good look

been v busy lots of tired ill dcs but i love looking after them and being in nurse/mummy mode

sorry not to name check but sending lots of sticky and swi vibes!

Another quickie from me - just finished writing a lecture on anarchism so feel justified in informed MN HQ that my cervical mucous has not only dried up but has been replaced by cottage cheese-esque thrush induced 'discharge' (Justine puts down her baguette).
So all good here - thrush a very good defence against unwanted dh advances I must say...
Hippy that's interesting about the toxo. Apparently most of us have had it at some point without realising it (though I haven't - was tested due to 'scary' markers on scan with dd3)so are therefore immune now. That's truly awful about the poor MNetter who lost her baby .
40some don't be too hard on yourself - I think it's usual for the body to take at least 6 wks to get back to normal, ofetn longer. I'm not convinced my so called ovulation was indeed that, though boobs very sore as is usual for me after ov . So tell me about the hair then - sounds intriguing!
BB me and dh reguarly have the 'my job's more important than yours' debate, and not in a an especially friendly way either...I have to remind him that I do a double shift (work then 'work') and his domestic contribution is more like a few bits of overtime...
Right, bed beckons. Feel bleughhhhh with a cold and sore throat. Oh and did I mention I have thrush??

Incog hiya, hope all is well.

To all on the bench, sit tight, as my dear old dad used to say.

louise how are you feeling? Hope you are getting some clarity/happiness/peace or whatever.

diege how are you now my dear?

Gum have you told your family yet?

No time to name check properly so sending quick hugs to Hippy, Jolls, 40somemum, Muchlove, Spotty and all you lovely people.

Very motivational - www.rosemaryconley.tv/Weight-Loss/Success-Stories/vx/2712_1047735/Jenna-Evans---lost-5st-8lb.aspx

This is interesting www.blogeatingdisorder.com/blog/346/breaking-the-power-of-a-binge/ here
I am feeling so much better. Managed to avoid chocolate cake last night!

God Bless you all.

Love and hugs and baby dust to all.

.

Hi all. No, Italian, not said anything to my family. I'm keeping quiet until at least 12 weeks. I told a friend today who was very excited and pleased, which was lovely, and my sister knows, but I'm not ready to tell the kids. I just want to get to 12 weeks first. Sometimes I wish I could tell them as it would help explain why I'm so exhausted and sick all the time. However, 9 months is a long time for children to wait.

As for our families, my DH suggested we don't tell our parents at all, let them work it out for themselves! He has a point, they are so negative about our large family and of no help at all.They also take very little interest in us and our kids, so I might just go with DH's idea! We'll see.

I have appointment with GP on Weds, then hopefully a scan the week later (8 weeks).Can't wait to see a heartbeat.

Can't believe tank has be banned. What on earth is the problem? Seems bloody-minded to me. Now I'll be banned!

Sorry to hear you aren't feeling well Deige. Thrush is yuck! My answer to thrush (apart from the usual prescription stuff) is a lovely yoghurt covered tampon. The relief is amazing!! It has to be all natural though, no flavoured stuff! oh...and don't eat it, place it in the effected body part...

Sorry you are still waiting 40some. Time has a way of passing slowly where ttc is concerned.

How are you all coping with the snow? I have serious snow envy. I fantasize about being snowed in (as long as we had a plentiful supply of G&B's chocolate and plenty of food)and not having to go to work or school. Of course I imagine the reality isn't as nice as my fantasy. And if I was 9 months pregnant I might be feeling a bit worried!

(chokes on her bacon roll) Bluergghhh Diege you do realise I?m already feeling a bit green to start with ... yes, yes, I know that?s good... and everyone is delighted

BB I despair ? you are taking completely the wrong approach ? you need to get him better trained ? do ya wanna borrow one of ma guns?

Hippy et al - I also have cats. You are however very, very unlikely to get toxoplasmosis from your cat, especially if you get someone else to change their litter and don?t clean up any little toilet accidents yourself! Toxo is pretty rare, and there are other sources, like raw meat (don?t eat raw meat either). I think studies show that most incidents of toxoplasmosis arise from poor meat hygiene (chopping salad on boards used to prepare raw meat etc) than from cats. Some advice here if anyone is worried.

I am very sorry to hear about the lady who miscarried. That must have been awful for her. When something unlikely happens to you, it doesn?t matter how bloody unlikely it was. It happened.

Having given it all a lot of thought though, as you can imagine, I suppose I have come to the conclusion that what you need to accept is that the world is a dangerous place, and you can?t totally protect anyone. Planes do land on people?s head ? it is very unlikely, but it happens. I have a friend whose 11 year old died messing around on a bunk bed. WTF Another who put her toddler to bed for a nap, who didn?t wake up. A 9 year old who died of flu. That?s before you even start with RTAs. But what can you do? The worst thing in a way would be to become paralysed with fear... so sensible precautions it is.... DH is changing the litter tray... and moggy stays put.

xposts Gum you can share my snow. There is so much snow, that the cat hasn't been out since Saturday. When you open the back door, there is total wall... I don't mean a drfit up agaisnt the door, the entire lawn is about 2 1/2 foot under. If the cat went out on it, he would drown

Glad you're still feeling sick and tired too xx

Hello! Feeling better thanks
Gum Ah yes the old natural yogurt. It has indeed relieved the itching in the past, but only have a muller light in the fridge at present I've also heard tea tree oil is good but haven't had the guts to try. I'm presuming diluted tea tree oil?Glad that both you and Tanlk are feeing rough, in the nicest possible way of course. Is it number 5 or 6 for you Gum? I will also be keeping things quiet from the family if I'm lucky enough to get pregnant again as they too have an irrational fear of me having any more which is odd as they live miles away and visit say every 2 mths (after some nagging).
Italian good for you on resisting the cake - I think I am resigning myself to giving into temptation now, and then starting afresh come Jan. Cliched I know, but too many goodies around. And doesn';t this weather just make you want to eat sweet stuff?
Temps roise again today, so hopoing now that I didn't ovulate yesterday after all in which case no chance at all this month (temps rose from 30s to 50s on Monday, then from 50s to 70s today
Better go - dh wants me to hold something while he gets his drill out!!!

Phew, tv set now attached to wall on bracket!

diege I was eating a sandwich!!!!!! You know I only get a chance to read this thread during lunch break

tank name changed again! Thrown off again or just playing with us??? I didn't mean to suggest to anyone that their beloved pets might be the cause of their MC's - i just felt i should share it just incase.

A boy in my DS1's class died about 18 months ago messing about on bunkbeds - it was awful - and of course i became paranoid about stuff hanging off the bunk beds cos the boy choked.

I agree the world is a dangerous place and we can only do so much. Scary innit!

gum I love the idea of you not telling your families and then just producing a baby in 7.5 months. If they are negative about your large family then it might be a plan. I understand what you're saying about wanting to tell the kids to explain your tiredness but i do remember how heartbreaking it was to tell the boys when i had the MMC and I'm so glad we didn't tell them about the next pregnancy that i lost at 7 weeks. Up to you, but i'd definitely wait a while.

This time last year i was busy getting preggers on the week-end of the works xmas do. here i am 12 months on Ovulating and going to the works xmas do again. Could I possibly repeat history and get preggers again???

Big hug for my bezzie mate who is ill. diege ((()))

x -posts diege

Your temps could be going up due to your illness. Anyway, you've done all you can for now.

Loved the comment - DH wants me to hold something - fnar fnar!!

Agree TANK you've become desensitised now so the 'punishments' are like water off a duck's back
Hippy hope the sandwich was nice - it didn't have cottage cheese in it did it? Re: temps, illness of course! Hadn't thought of that at all, but the obvious reason. As you say, nothing I can do now anyway, so will just keep my fingers crossed for a decent lp at worst and at best one of those post-mc babies that happen due to raised fertility after mc that I read about Really hoping you have a bfp to celebrate by xmas day

Hi all, diege I think Toni talks about a step pattern of temp rises - I think it is the first temp rise that applies. I often have a rise then a dip and don't really know when ov has occurred.

tg am not even discussing ov or ttc with dh, but I think hippy's idea is good - I'll tell him ov was last week. Both of us have stinking colds now and it seems unlikely that dhs parents can get here to babysit son looks as though we won't be having a weekend of hot passion anyway. Hippy I'm also in Deja vu situation As I was just pg this time last year. Snow has also brought back lots of memories as I was feeling v sick during the snow in Jan.

gum I would be in the same position with my family as you, they disapprove a lot of me having a large family, but it doesn't affect them really as they don't help out particularly. Still express their opinion a lot though.

Hello to everyone else, any news anyone? Gah it' s hard typing this on the iPad.

Thanks BB*. Staircase rise would actually fit with my usual temos post-ov too, so that makes sense.
Bad luck about your weekend btw Was it an 'away do' or just one with baby sitters to hand?

yes, we've got a lovely hotel and dinner booked. . my mum (who lives in the same town as us) has said she has too many "commitments" to help out this weekend so it looks as though we're going to lose our money instead. dh has said he will try and persuade his folks, but not sure they will come - although trains are running here now, so who knows? They try much harder than my family, but live much further away.

Bummer I thought my family were bad (my mum couldn't look after dd1 when I was in labour with dd2 as she had agreed to meet a frined for lunch...) but let's hope you get something sorted with dh's parents. I would be so and if a rare weekend away didn't happen!

dh says I've got to stop being unreasonable about her, she could, for the first time in her life, have some very valid appointments this weekend which could stop her helping me out at all , but given that she normally spends the time either shopping or dropping in on me for coffee, I don't know what they could be.

anyway, I do know I can't expect her to babysit, but we've spent alot of money this weekend which we won't get back.

and i was looking forward to a lie in. (and possibly morning sex...).

your mother sounds similarly helpful diege. I have sworn that I won't be like this when I have grandchildren. (or like the way she is to me as a daughter).

I am also determined to not use my mother as a role model BB. I swear mine only comes to see me when she wants to get something from Ikea which is a few miles away Sorry your's is like that too Tank On a happier note did dh enjoy his potato? Nice and curdy was it?

beattie oh poor you i would be livid...has she backed out or just been asked?

We both also swear we wont be like our parents and we WONT! DP's mum left when he was 14 and barely glimpsed him again and oddly the story is the same for me - having a large family with NO GP's is hard but sometimes it is a blessing. None of the hassle.

A weekend away would be nice though.

Ovulation has struck like a bolt from the blue for me today - good job I am obsessively staring at lines on cardboard had some ov sticks in!

Two cars trashed and a burst pipe at work - this has not been our week. Time for some good luck methinks

Diege are we still cycle buddies then??

Oh no, Tank's messages deleted again. It sucks.

I really understand what everyone is saying about their parents. My MIL was always a big help til we crossed the line and had....a third baby!I don't quite understand her as she had 4 herself. But I suppose that was the olden days when there wasn't any contraception? Actually when I had DS2 and she stayed to help with DS1 she asked if there was anything she could do before my parents came to visit. I was in hospital, so asked if she could vacuum the floor for me as I hadn't got round to it and it really needed it. When she came back the next day to say goodbye before heading back home she told me she didn't vacuum cos she couldn't be bothered!

My parents really are neglectful. I think in the last 12 months I've had 2 phone calls. I'm the one who has to call them, and now I don't think I will. It is just wrong that I have to do all the work in our relationship. If they were a boyfriend I'd have pissed him off years ago! I also know my mum has been to our town(which is 2 hours drive from where they live) 3 times in the last month but hasn't told me, or organized to meet or see our kids.

Deige, I can't believe your mum couldn't help out when you were in labour! I would drop everything if it were my child having a baby. BTW this is bub number 6. I'm bracing myself for all the comments we'll get. When we had our fifth we got the usual, "Don't you know how babies are made?", "Don't you have a telly?", "Didn't you know the world is over populated?" etc, etc.

Last weekend at my DH's department party one of the guys said something about our large family, to which I replied, "that's because we are at it like rabbits!" I think if anyone makes a negative comment I will throw the embarrassing line at them about our very healthy sex life. Any suggestions greatly appreciated.

My sickness is amping up a level. So that's a good thing, but I really do feel like crap. Roll on week 16....I usually stay sick til then, though not as bad as at, say, week 10.

I've got a lovely weekend lined up, today, growers market and coffee(herbal tea) with a mate in the a.m. then Knitting club this afternoon ( I know it sounds nannerish, but I love that I get a couple of hours to stitch and bitch with good friends). Tomorrow I have book-club at a very very nice restaurant for afternoon tea. Doesn't really take much to keep Gum happy!

Tank - sorry sorry sorry, if it was me that outed you completely by saying glad to have you back. Totally stupid of me. I wish that mnhq would stop being horrible to you.

I hate the way that they (mn hq) are clearly monitoring our posts now, it makes me feel weird about it, I know it is a public sight and that anyone could read, but somehow, having the hosts here vetting what is posted feels horrible. Each time they delete the posts it messes up the thread. And reminds me of our missing friend. Hope you can come back soon to us tank.

My dh and I were working on our christmas newsletter today, and it was weird, looking back at the year it was great, so much done, fun had, etc. But then saying it was a good year was tough, as I have lost 4 pregnancies in this year alone (two chemical pregnancies and two early m/c's). I had due dates for 20 Jan, 7 Apr, 15 July, 10 Sept, (23 Jan 11, 17 Feb 11 and 11 Apr 11 due dates still to pass). How could I call this a good year? My dh made the comment, well you started the year pregnant, perhaps you will end it the same way...... most unhelpful comment. I really get the feeling that he still would like me to get pregnant again. This is just messing my head, I have come to be ok about not having another one, but now he is saying things that make me wonder if I should not go back on the pill???? Anyway, overall the year has been good, I love my family.

Sorry this is a very me-me post, will try to come back less self-indulgent later!

I m back!! Bruges good but cold but made the most of it. Survived my bday I had some lovely pressure and all made a big effort. We got back from Bruges this morning and I m now very depressed and sad at how my life has turned out. We ve just been to a supermarket and a guy with a 12 week baby was stood behind us I ended up entering in to a conversation with him about how lucky he is as my baby was stillborn. I m sure this was what he wanted to hear while he was shopping!!!!

Now I'm Soo depressed that my life is Soo shite and empty. There's a great big void where Georgie should be and I absolutely HATE my life. I ve got a full wardrobe of baby clothes and no Fu**ing baby . Oh and to top it all today i got my period so I'm not even pregnant.people are dealing with Xmas and buying Xmas pressure etc when we are design with the results from our daughters post Mortom!!! How does that work ?!?

Hope all are well but i m sorry I m too down to namechech. I want the life I should have , the life I wAs due not this pile of fuc** ing shite , this existence.

" pressure" should read presents!!!