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Original poster

Have given DS Calpol & DH is angry - advice please

194 replies

MoreSunshinePlease · 10/05/2010 13:37

DS hurt his foot a couple of days ago (nasty bruise, no bones broken thank goodness), I gave him 2 teaspoons of 6+ Calpol. DH is now really angry & says I've behaved in a detrimental way regarding DSs health because of the links to asthma.

I believe that if a child is in pain, they should have pain relief. Does anyone know about the effects of Calpol, any medical experts out there?

I feel DH had gone over the top regarding this, he has accused me of undermining him. I asked a nurse at the local hospital, she said it was fine, DH (dentist) says she doesn't know what she is talking about as he reads 'highly regarded medical publications' & is therefore more in the know.

OP posts:
grapeandlemon · 10/05/2010 23:41

OMG you poor thing.

Do what coldtitz advises; this is really very serious

KickArseQueen · 10/05/2010 23:46

Please do as colditz says.

I would be worried at his leaving without more argument - what is his intention?

I'm not trying to frighten you, but bottom line your H has keys to your house. He can come and take your ds.

I remember from another thread that it was when the husband suddenly seemed more ameniable that he was at his most dangerous.

Please leave.

Please contact womensaid.

I have a friend who did, she was not sorry.

wonka · 10/05/2010 23:46

wishing you good luck tomorrow, you must be so scared! Hope you manage to sleep!

KickArseQueen · 10/05/2010 23:50

????

I sincerley hope that she has NOT gone to sleep!

I may be overly concerned, but he has keys!

Its an old adage! Never underestimate a crazy bloke!

OP Hope u are ok and please, please cal WA

differentnameforthis · 11/05/2010 00:51

She can report him to his dental association for doing treatment without pain relief against his pt's wishes.

mathanxiety · 11/05/2010 02:04

Get serious help TODAY, SB. That means WA and a solicitor TODAY, as well as calling your DS's school.

Call the Australian embassy to tell them what you suspect and send them a letter stating you do not give any permission for any Australian passport to be issued for your son. Have this letter witnessed and send by registered post. Don't worry about appearing to be nuts.

Your H must be stopped.

If you've been married just 18 months, is your DS his or yours and your ex's? Does he have paternity?

Do not send DS to school. Call the school and explain exactly what is happening. Do not leave out any details or fears. Ask for their help and co-operation (and any suggestions they can offer -- maybe there's a social worker or liaison to the police.) Your DS must not be released to anyone but you if he returns to school, no matter what the circumstances. They must set up some sort of protocol for your DS.

I would consider reporting your H to the dental association for the operation without anesthesia that he performed. I think they would look askance at the idea of any 'professional' performing an operation on a family member. This was a big no no for the medical professionals in my family. They always referred to other colleagues.

Milkmade · 11/05/2010 02:35

Ok, we've just applied for aussie passports for my dds and the deal is that you both sign in front of witnesses, and if one of you isn't and aussie national you have to give their contact details amd they phone them to give authorisation. However this step really doesn't add much in the way of security, as they just asked dh if he gave permission, and as security check what the dds bitrthdates were. If he wanted to clear this bit, he's probably just given his mums details.

you can however go here:
www.passports.gov.au/Web/ChildAlert.aspx

to stop a possport being issued for your ds.

MortaIWombat · 11/05/2010 07:04

Please take some of the advice on here. Best of luck.

Magaly · 11/05/2010 08:29

I agree with Colditz. Go to your mum's and don't let your son out of your sight.

I did a runner with my kids. Bring on the flames..... (obviously in my eyes it was justified as I was the one being abused, but still).

KickArseQueen · 11/05/2010 09:26

Magaly, you won't be flamed here for that.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 11/05/2010 10:41

No flames from me either, Magaly - just lots of admiration for your strength and courage.

And MSP/SB - having read this thread and the other one, my heart goes out to you, and I hope you can find the old kick-ass you and resolve this situation once and for all.

I wish there was more I could do, than to tell you that you did absolutely the right thing for your son by getting him the proper treatment and giving him pain relief, and I honestly believe that you will carry on doing the right thing for yourself and your son.

{{hugs}}

princessmel · 11/05/2010 10:56

Any news from SB?MSP today?

Just read both threads.

SilverBoots · 11/05/2010 14:34

We are OK. Have phoned WA. Plans are being put in place to go.

Thanks

thumbwitch · 11/05/2010 14:39

Thank goodness for that, silverboots. I hope WA were helpful - sounds like they were.

princessmel · 11/05/2010 14:40

Hi SB.

That's good news.
Have you found the passport yet?

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 11/05/2010 15:11

I am glad you are OK, SilverBoots, and we are here if you need to talk.

mathanxiety · 11/05/2010 15:28

SB -- many good wishes going your way.

lou031205 · 11/05/2010 15:42

Late to this thread, but SilverBoots well done for having the courage to phone WA. Keep safe x

belledechocolatefluffybunny · 11/05/2010 17:04

I'm really glad that you are OK, there's help out there for you. It's a huge step that you are taking but you'll look back at this time and see the future in a more positive light.

Octavia09 · 11/05/2010 18:23

I would buy arnica cream or pillules. Boots, Revital sell them. They are natural and do help.
Calpol is not a good medicine. Just read the list of ingredients. I would give Calpol when there is high fever only and when homeopathy does not work. But I know you wanted best for your kid.

TiredMummy2 · 11/05/2010 18:41

Octavia I don't think you have read the thread, this situation is way beyond Calpol. Please read the thread.

Octavia09 · 11/05/2010 19:05

TiredMummy, I have understood the issue; also I understood that her dh is a dentist. To be a dentist you have to study a lot and a lot of medicine. He overreacted over the top but he probably understands more about Calpol as a dentist. I actually never seen a dentist with good white, beautiful teeth. Yet, they all want to give you lots of treatments. This is because they know what the stuff is made of and what it might cause to their teeth.

As for that lady I feel for her because my dh can have a terrible attitudes as well just because he thinks he is right. He blames me for all sort of things and that is probably because of his idiotic personality; some men are like that.

StayingDavidTennantsGirl · 11/05/2010 19:09

Octavia - did you see the bit where she said her dh got cross with her for taking her ds to the hospital, where they drilled through the nail to release the haematoma underneath - because he was capable of, and intending to do the same thing at home - without pain relief!!

AnyFucker · 11/05/2010 19:14

Octavia...did you wander into this thread on your way to fluffybunniesandflowers.com ???

TiredMummy2 · 11/05/2010 19:16

Octavia - don't you think that the fact he was angry about the calpol might be the least of her problems given the other things in this and her other thread. Also just because years ago he studied a lot to become a dentist does not mean that he is up to date on all current research into pharmacology relating to children.