Anyone else scream during childbirth? Did you feel embarrassed afterwards?

[FrozenNorth]

I've posted my birth story here before (HERE) and am really grateful for all your comments.

This is really a follow-on question: basically, does anyone else feel bad about making a lot of noise during delivery? I can't work out if this is a normal thing to feel ashamed of or whether it might signal that perhaps something is going on for me psychologically (have been wondering about PND but just not sure).

DD arrived in 3 pushes without any pain relief. During that time the midwives very sternly told me to stop screaming, calm down and start pushing. Problem is, I was pushing but couldn't help screaming at the same time - it bloody hurt, and I was really scared given that I'd only just been told that I was a) in established labour and b) about to have a baby. I really wish one of them had just said that it was okay to make noise if I had to. Instead they seemed to be trying to make me quieten down for the sake of the other women in the delivery suite.

I'm not quite sure what I'm asking here other than has anyone else found themselves screaming during labour and if so how did your health care provider react to it?

I screamed profanities for hours. The head MW kept coming in "to see what was going on in here", but I didn't stop . I am sweary at the best of times TBH.

I honestly don't give a toss. It got my baby out. I can't believe I was the worst they ever had- I didn't assault the MW or anything!

I don't remember so I asked dh. He said "you did a lot of low moaning and kept saying ouch ouch. Then when the paedeatrician walked in you fixed him with a steely glare and said "who the FUCK are you and what the FUCK do you want?" before shrieking "go away you stupid twat" to him". Am a little embarrassed about that, to be honest.

My name is katnkankles and I am a screamer.

I'm so NOT emotional normally but in labour I just let go and don't give a damn... with my 3rd she was very quick but intense, I thought I was coping badly when I started screaming in the car then discovered I was 10cms dilated when I arrived at the hospital...

If there is a time for screaming and letting go.. it is labour.

I am pregnant with my 4th and intending to scream my way through this one too. I am never rude though and always apologise for swearing/being noisy apparently!!

I didn't make much noise at all, but that was MY way of coping. I was worried about getting into a state and panicking. BUT if your way of coping is to scream I think the midwives are just going to have to lump it, and possibly wear earplugs.
I think I remember it reasonably well, but DP said I was off my face when I got gas and air and just kept raving on about how great it was and how he should try it.

only read OP, but I howled like an animal.

because I AM an animal.

Skapot was a bit at your DP broadcasting your screams. I'm guessing he was providing a commentary to family, not being a wierdo though.

No, I had an epidural both times so was no need to yell. Apart from at the end of birth with DS, they let the epidural wear off and it was hurty. I did cry a bit then. But no actual screaming either time.

With DS1 I had an involutary and frighteningly animal like sound coming deep from my throat which I had NO control over whatsoever - MW suggested if I could stem it I could push better but I really couldn't - was strange. Felt very calm and serene though - thoroughly enjoyed it.

DS2 (who was nearly 11 lbs) decided to crown then stop coming...
I told DH and the MW I was 'going to die - tell my mother I love her' and also shouted to MW 'Get the fucking head out for me!'. A little bit later she came out with the classic 'Push Dear!' to which my reply was, again the classic 'I am fucking pushing!'. Cue DHs red face...

DS3 was my first 'dry land' experience and I hated it. Was leaning over the back of the bed doing a lot of groaning really and DH kept thrusting the G&A at me, trying to be helpful. 'Oh please?' I say 'Do you really think that shit actually numbs the pain?!'

All in all - I never felt embarassed at all. I apologised after DS2s birth but knew the MW and she knew me from previous so wasn't bothered at all.
This was the only time I actually swore at the MW.
None of the noises I made embarassed me - you need to do what you need to do.

DD1 is due in 6 weeks and I shall make whatever weird noises I like!

My mum was a midwife and I've always been brought up with mum telling people on TV to stop screaming and get on with it.

Had ds1 - a drug addled birth, but no screaming. Ds2 was 4hrs from start to finish, hurt like hell & I screamed!! Apparently I scared the woman in the room next to me , the midwife didn't say anything and quite frankly it's how I dealt with the pain! Afterwards I felt like I'd been hit by a bus and did feel quite resentful of such a quick, painful birth, I think hormones have quite alot to do with it.

I screamed ("fuuuuuuccckkkk" with the contraction) and wasn't remotely embarrassed. Although was very polite and chatty but somehow still demure with the anaesthetist - he had drugs. I got my epidural, even though was fully dilated. What a nice man.

With dd2, I screamed the hospital down during the 2 pushes it took to get her out, but it felt absolutely normal. I was really loud, but it was also really funny thinking back about it. With dd1 and ds I was told when to start pushing and I don't think I did scream but with dd2 it was completely natural. I just felt this overwhelming urge which took over and it felt great to scream actually. I highly recommend it. Midwife was not even in the room when I started screaming but she soon came in. I don't think I would have heard her if she told me to stop. I was LOUD.

I did not scream during contractions though. Just breathed deeply. I think screaming through contractions doesn't help you at all.

My second baby was back to back and 9lbs and 8oz, I remember screaming " oh GOD it hurts!" and the midwife saying "Yes, it does!". LOL

I felt silly in one way doing that but liberating in another way, it felt good to verbalise it.

In the end I had to have a C section, as I wasn't dilating properly and he was thoroughly wedged, the little blighter

Do what you need to do at the end of the day

I'm sorry your MW wasn't understanding/ senstive please try not to worry about it. You're at your most vulnerable and in a heck of a lot of pain in labour.

I screamed and swore (particularly the 'f' word- repeatedly) so much that i lost my voice for 4 days. I do not feel remotely bad, and only slightly embarrassed.

I screamed with DC1 and DC4. DC1 as I was in shock at how much it hurt and ended up with ventouse on gas and air. The obstetrician told me to stop screaming and put the effort into pushing - I didn't mind her telling me as it focused my mind!

DC4 was induced and very quick and I lost control - the midwife told me to concentrate and calm down - she apologised afterwards, but I didn't mind at all - again, it just made me focus on what I was supposed to be doing.

I didn't feel embarrassed and judging from the sounds coming out of the other rooms on the delivery suite, we are not alone on this thread!

Am loving this thread.
With ds1 I spent most of the last 35 minutes in the car with no pain relief and I was indeed screaming. I remember telling dh between contractions not to worry as it was helping. Once in hospital (for the last 5 mins) I did get that standard comment from mws about 'stop wasting your energy screaming'. Which made me feel a bit wimpy and looking back was indeed probably bollocks as I don't believe I'd have been screaming if it hadn't helped.

When I had ds2 the last few mins were in an ambulance with lovely non-judgey paramedics and I must say I preferred that in some ways - ie no-one there who would tell me I was doing it wrong, just someone who could do the appropriate first-aid if it all went pear-shaped.

If I was going to have another baby (which I'm not) I think I would probably put something on my birthplan about 'don't tell me off for screaming or interfere unless something is actually going wrong'.

Thank you for this thread.

I hereby cease to feel embarrassed.

I didn't scream, but moaned very loudly. For me was more the effort than the pain, as I have to push for 3 hours. I wasn't ashamed of the noise, just worried about waking up the neighbours (home delivery). But my midwife didn't say a word, just reminded me to keep my chin to my chest to make sure that the pushes were efficient.
Any midwife that tells you off, obviously hasn't gone through it herself, and she wants to comment perhaps should find something positive to say instead.

I was completely silent all through labour until it came to pushing, then my mum told me afterwards that I was "growling and grunting so loudly that the midwife checked her badge to make sure it didn't say "Veterinarian" under her name"

I wanted to scream before pushing, really wanted to scream, but I was so in shock from the pain and how much I was shaking from the pain that nothing would come out even when I tried!

Although I didn't exactly scream during labour, when I arrived at the hospital, my labour had only started 30 mins before but I was already in fully established, every 90 secs labour (have one child so always expected labour to take days!) Arrived at 4am and had to use the intercom whilst hubby parked the car and as I pressed the buzzer, a contraction started. Recptionist siad ' Southmead maternity unit, can I help?' Her response 'AAAAAARRRRRRRRGGGGGGGHHHHHHHHHHHH!' pause 'Door's open!'

I had a very fast, intense 2nd labour (0-push in under 40mins), then dd got stuck. As they were trying to fit epidural, someone told me that I wasn't doing baby any favours by pushing; after that the only way I could not push was to scream my feckin' head off. For over an hour, because the anaesthetist was really struggling. (And I was maybe a little, um, squirmy.)

She came to see me afterwards, couldn't have been sweeter. I've often felt bad that she thinks I was screaming from the pain. It hurt, but mainly it was a way of directing the contractions up rather than down, iygwim.

I had a hideous first birth and screamed like a banshee.

I stayed at home for the first 12 hours, very mild contractions which very suddenly intensified so we dashed to Hospital. They managed to lose my notes within 10 minutes of us arriving (we later discovered they had been taken and left at the bedside of a woman on the labour ward!?)

The very first thing they did (as they didn't have my notes to consult) was insist I lie on my back and be monitored. I felt like I needed to push but was told that I couldn't be in established labour as my contractions weren't registering.

The midwife kept coming in and out, and DH ended up having to press the emergency buzzer when I ripped the monitors off and tried to dash to the loo yelling 'I need to poo'

Two midwives came in, one called me a 'stupid girl' and the other was suggesting DH should go home and get some sleep.

At that point my waters spectacularly broke as they were trying to wrestle me back into the monitor belt. I was effing and blinding, and I've never felt fear like it. I knew DS was about to come but the 'professionals' were saying otherwise and as a first time mother I put trust in them.

I could feel the crowning and they were still faffing around trying to get the monitor pads on, DH had a look, and yelled 'he's coming'

The midwives looked so shocked and as I was trying to move to push one grabbed my legs, pinned them up and was saying ' push harder, or I will have to cut you'. I was screaming very very loudly and was also told to be quiet.

DH tells me in the calm moment after the head was born I said 'Is this not fucking labour then you bitch' (oops)

I ended up tearing, but only slightly however I reckon I wouldn't have if the midwife had been more supportive - instead i ended up scared witless.

She then tugged on the placenta, which I am certain led to me having retained placenta and needing a spinal and manual extraction an hour after the birth (grrr)

Sorry I rambled on a bit - it still bothers me. I put in a formal complaint, and DD was born by a very calm scream free home birth. (I did make an odd humming noise though haha)

I was on a drip for inducucing labour but I did move around quite a bit. There was no way they were going to stop me frankly!

I swore and screamed a lot, begged for a cesarian at several points. One midwife said I'd have a sore throat the next day of I kept on screaming. I just said "a sore throat is the last of my f*ing problems" and kept on screaming. I was right btw about it being the least of my problems the next day.

The problem for me was my body just seemed to be pushing and I was being told not to push. The whole thing is a blur but I did tell my doula I loved her at one point. I also remember feeling so much sympathy and conenction with women through the ages who did this with no pain relief whatsover. My gas and air was being gripped very tightly at this point!

I had the drip fall out at one point and the contractions stop. They tried to make me go to the loo for a wee but there was no way I could. the whole thing felt really quite manic and exhausting. I think it was only about 6-7 hours in total before the final pushing stage started but it really was very intense

The actual pushing bit at the end was calm though and I remember clearly pushing with every contraction. I didn't scream for that bit anywhere near as much - it was mostly mooing and groaning. It did take 2 hours though, just at the point of them calling in a doctor (because of the limit they put on pushing time for a first birth) ds was born

the labour was an induced one though so maybe not really typical, then again what is a typical labour?

I really wasn't embarrassed about how I had behaved. luckily I don't remember much, though I think dh was quite traumatised and was in tears ar one point.