Anyone else scream during childbirth? Did you feel embarrassed afterwards?

[FrozenNorth]

I've posted my birth story here before (HERE) and am really grateful for all your comments.

This is really a follow-on question: basically, does anyone else feel bad about making a lot of noise during delivery? I can't work out if this is a normal thing to feel ashamed of or whether it might signal that perhaps something is going on for me psychologically (have been wondering about PND but just not sure).

DD arrived in 3 pushes without any pain relief. During that time the midwives very sternly told me to stop screaming, calm down and start pushing. Problem is, I was pushing but couldn't help screaming at the same time - it bloody hurt, and I was really scared given that I'd only just been told that I was a) in established labour and b) about to have a baby. I really wish one of them had just said that it was okay to make noise if I had to. Instead they seemed to be trying to make me quieten down for the sake of the other women in the delivery suite.

I'm not quite sure what I'm asking here other than has anyone else found themselves screaming during labour and if so how did your health care provider react to it?

When i was in labour with ds1 it was very different as i knew he wouldnt survive bless him (born 26 weeks lived two hours) With ds2 I was in the labour ward watching a cricket match with my husband, every time England got a wicket i yelled in excitement which brought three midwives in ...."Are you ok Mrs Jenkins?" "I'm fine it was just a wicket!!" They were most unimpressed and couldnt wait to get me into the delivery room. I kept sending them out to see what the score was!!

Iwas so silent it is scary and the midwife actually complained that I was too quiet and she'd just have to watch and be ready for baby when I pushed. I'm normally a very loud person and find it so strange that I was silent. Have two children and my hubby thinks it must not hurt as I didn't make a sound. I can't seem to explain it was horrendous. I wish I'd been able to scream

I mooed like a cow and moaned like a whale and told the epidural man I loved him. Midwife just kept saying "youre doing really well" over and over again like a mantra. THAT is what you need to hear not sheeite like you got.. she sounds mean.

I thought a good midwife used her ears, eyes and hands (i.e different noises represent different stages of labour...)

During DD2, the second midwife came in (as they do at the pint of delivery) stating, "sounds like someone's having a baby in here"! I was!

POINT of delivery

i was quiet, though i thought screaming was meant to help?

i didn't want to scare my Mum.

I moaned during almost the whole thing, I found it helped to 'voice' my pain but when it came to pushing I didn't make any noise, I screamed once and the midwife told to push the scream downwards and use it to help push the baby out, which I did. She was out within 5 pushes.

I think using the screams I would have been making as a way to get more pressure and energy into pushing worked well but my midwife was brilliant and told me in a very clear way and in no way patronised or bullied me into doing it.

I was quiet as had an epidural which latest till the end

I will NEVER EVER forget hearing the other women though, sweet jesus

One women wailed in a scary and hoorendous way "get it out of me" then 2 seconds seconds later I heard a baby wail! even now it chokes me

i'm impressed by people's restraint

in the second, most painful and trying, labour I was terrified of doctors

it was a vbac and i didn't want a doctor anywhere near me

so I told one to fuck off

i don't remember it, my husband told me later

I was the same as mememe. Even during the pre natal meetings, I couldn't understand people saying they were going to scream. Kept thinking, "how can they scream if they're in pain?"

It was awful, just got quieter and quieter. Baby went into distress and emergency section.

I'm very verbal too, so can't explain it.

Envy those who can make a noise, I could have done with having some lessons in screaming I think.

SK

reading all these birth stories, it makes me want to give birth again

it is so wonderful and amazing, we are very lucky

I shouted a LOT with my first and did feel good for doing it although I did find that it served me better to focus all my energies on the pushing in the end (as the nice midwife advised) - I was certainly not told to quiten myself.
My throat hurt soooooooo much the next day.
I regretted it for that reason and that reason alone.
If there's one time when you have to 'go with it' then it's when you're giving birth. I'm normally quite a restrained person but I think if they had told me to quieten myself for the sake of the others I would have told them where to put their request

The woman next door to me mooed like cow for most of her labour....it was quite soothing after a while!

I didnt make any noise having ds1 or ds2...I sort of concentrated on my breathing and used my TENS and tried to focus. Was very intense, especially with ds2 after they broke my waters and I went from 4 cms to delivered in 3 hours!! Didnt help when stupid student midwife kept trying to talk to me in the middle of a contraction! Just ignored her. She got the message eventually...why do they do that btw???? Try to talk to you/ask you things whilst you are in the throes of a contraction???

As for you being embarrassed, no need to be. The midwives have seen and heard it all before I am sure.

Very about these stories of women in labour being told off! If I had wanted/needed to scream I bloody would have!

Scream during conception, scream during birth.
No harm in letting yourself go once in a while

I don't think I screamed but with ds (no epidural sadly, just gas and air!), I did make a weird animal noise, at which stage the midwife asked if I wanted to push. I lied and said I didn't as i was in the middle of asking the anaesthetist for my epidural but then involuntarily the weird noise came out again and three minutes later ds arrived! It was very strange!

haven't managed to read all posts but yes! started primal yelling/screaming not far into labour and kept it up til transition even with gas and air... agree it helped with pain relief, sure it must release endorphins or something. but after the first, huge, bellowing-yell which was almost opera and lasted about 200 seconds I'm sure, the midwife did look me in the eye and say firmly: 'omaoma, are you IN CONTROL?' to which i thought 'of course i'm f*cking not!' but said, snappily, 'yesssss!'

sorry, meant to add - i didn't feel embarrassed, stupid AT ALL, it was a huge release in lots of ways. if anybody made you feel that way they are ver very bad at their job. labour is all about YOU and what works for you, and any good midwife/obstetric should know that

I screamed during the puching stage, after 6 weeks in hospital, 6 months in wheelchair with severe SPD, semi-failed induction, two failed epidurals, 24 hours stuck flat on my back in agony, while haemorrhaging all over the bed/floor

the midwife told me to "shut up" as I was going to "frighten the baby"

I howled like a werewolf and whacked a nurse who walked in and tried to rub my back.

In my defence I had my back turned at the time and thought she was DP

Didn't scream but moaned and groaned a lot - really felt like an animal! At one point I kept saying my husband's name over and over as I gripped his hand and he said my name back, which I found really comforting.

Pain was tough at times but it felt oddly familiar, for some reason, and I never felt out of control or needed pain relief. I did a bit of hypnobirthing stuff and read 'New Active Birth' during pregnancy and I really believe it helped - as did staying at home so I was in a comfortable environment. I wasn't embarrassed by any of my behaviour but remember looking around the bedroom afterwards at the blood and poo-stained plastic sheets and thinking 'Christ, it looks like CSI Miami'

Oh god I screamed my tits off. Really loudly. I became frightened after the MW had given me a sneaky sweep causing my cervix to bleed and half hour later didn't notice the baby was on her way out .
Everyone was very kind to me - though I did feel a bit of a berk after.

Why the hell should anyone feel a berk after shouting/swearing during labour? it's not like anybody gets criticised for yelling when their broken leg is being set! or orgasming, as somebody mentions...

The consultant told me that he'd never heard someone be quite so noisy with DS2. I can't remember screaming at all, but since my epidural had worn off, the batteries had run out on the tens and I can't do gas and air - I wasn't that suprised.
TBH unless you've given birth yourself, I don't think you've got the right to complain about anyone else!!

I mooed like a cow with DS2. I actually made a conscious decision to make as much noise as I felt like, because the yogic calm I was trying to exude with DS1s birth did not work for me (I guess I didn't know what I was doing).

It certainly helped me - as did clutching DSs hand through every single contraction

I also pooed myself (Thai curry). Not embarrassed about that, as such, but it was a bit embarrassing when I asked the midwife if that was the waters breaking.

The obstetrician did tell me to make less noise as it was detracting from pushing effort, but I disliked her and the way she spoke to me and the midwife, so I think the anger made me more determined to push him out ......

Bit embarrassed about the off-colour remark I made when the anaesthetist sprayed cold water on my tits to test for anaesthesia during DS1s EMCS ...

I'm finding reading these stories very powerful.

OP - hope this is helping you.