Sweet Jesus Medee I thought I had missed something - even though your post didn't make 100% sense. It took me about 15 minutes to write what I did (changed about 3,000 times) and in the end thought I should acknowledge it but that's all - can't tell you what a relief it is to see it was a typo! phew.
OK can someone please point me in the direction of the new fred as I can't find it. Thanks.
Comma, as he will now be known, for the simple reason that he keeps putting himself into a comma shape in exactly the same way as he was when he was inside me, is currently asleep on a playmat looking beautiful. We've had a rough few days. Two nights ago we had virtually no sleep - not because of Comma who was ironically sleeping like the proverbial - but for reasons unknown we Just Couldn't Sleep. My hormones were starting to kick in - beginning of baby blues - and I think I just got overwhelmed by the events of the previous week and a half. My milk was coming in and my breast shape was changing and I was struggling to get him to latch while I was lying down, so couldn't feed and sleep, and after that I just couldn't sleep.
LC also was up crying because the toilet flush was too loud when he went to the toilet which didn't help.
We were therefore utterly wrecked yesterday. At 10.30 YOB's uncle and aunt f-ing well turned up unannounced, sat down and expected tea and biscuits and stayed for a f-ing hour. I had friends coming at midday and my parents for a BBQ in the evening. All I wanted to do was to get a loaf of bread in the breadmaker and I couldn't because his f-ing aunt was sitting on her fat arse having me run around after her for an HOUR. I was scarcely dressed and had just a few minutes before run the vacuum around the room in preparation for the friends so at least one room looked presentable but I'd wanted to do more and couldn't. The conversation as she came through the door was, "Hello, how are you feeling". Me, "Exhausted. Utterly exhausted. Lovely to see you. We have friends coming soon and I am just trying to get ready for them". Her, "Are you breastfeeding?". Me, "Er (what business is it of yours?) Yes". Her, "Good. We'd love a cup of tea".
She then went on to tell me all about her Granddaughter who is reading two syllable words at the age of 4 and she's hoping it won't be a disadvantage when she starts school to be so far ahead of the other children.
So our friends arrived an hour later and that was finally their cue to piss off, and when my friend came in and hugged me hello and asked me if I was ok (of all things to ask) I just had an ickle cry.
Friends were great (I mean these are my bestest friends - I gave LC his middle name after their surname) and that was lovely, but then after that I had to chuck them out because I needed to take Comma to the out of hours doc as I'd realised that morning that he'd started with oral thrush, which had also attacked me nips, making me veeery sore. Unfortunately I'm still a bit unsteady from the blood loss/iron levels so YOB drove me into town and dropped me off, as I didn't feel safe driving, and when I'd got the script I then stupidly walked to the pharmacy which is like 10 minutes away. Hardly a long way, but I was carrying Comma in the sling and by the time I got there I was fighting back the tears. My pelvis hurt so much and I was SO tired.
Then when we got home it was back to the feeding which was going terribly thanks to the thrush. Parents came around for BBQ bringing everything because they're fab. Mum helped me get him on so he had a good feed but I didn't manage more than a couple of hours before chucking them out in turn and going to bed for an early night.
Cue struggle again with feeding, hormone overload, tears streaming, YOB not knowing what to do. He made me call the NCT BF line and she was absolutely wonderful. Basically, I KNOW he's getting enough milk because he's getting lots of wet and dirty nappies, but I was just losing confidence as I was in a lot of pain and SOOOO tired. She talked me through things and made me realise I was doing ok and really calmed me down. Can't thank her enough.
We had a brilliant night's sleep. I was up feeding and changing him a couple of times but YOB slept through most of it so he got some good sleep, too, which he really needed. The thrush medication is really kicking in and I feel so much better. Feeding is much better today now I'm more relaxed and the pain from the thrush is going. And THEN the MW came and weighed him - he's put on 2oz! That's amazing as most babies lose weight at this stage so he's obviously feeding brilliantly. The pelvic pain I'm getting is, she says, ligament pain (I was worrying about having a uterine infection) and she's taken bloods so she can treat me for anaemia if required.
I'm posting this here deliberately. Hopefully, clearly not to freak out all you soon-to-be mums but because I wanted to say that in the early days things change so fast from fine to awful to fine again, and especially with things like BFing and often something like thrush can come on in a matter of hours and be horrendous - but it also passes quickly and not to give up! I did understand last night why people would give up and just give a bottle. Seeing the formula disappear into their tummies would be really reassuring but the BF counsellor gave me the confidence that actually he was getting plenty and of course the MW today confirmed this.
I'm feeling a million times better tonight. My beautiful little boy is just waking up and I have had a lovely relaxing day being looked after by my gorgeous husband. A few more days of this and I will feel normal again, I'm sure!