Anybody else due in NOVEMBER 2009 :-) PART 3

[ldeeanna]

Hopefully this has worked?

We get free dating scan at 12 weeks and anomaly scan at 20 weeks up here. Nuchals haven't ever been mentioned, so I assume they're just private or for the over 35's up here in Aberdeen? I found out yesterday I get a growth scan at 36 weeks with having had a c/s last time, when they decide whether I'm a candidate for a VBAC.

Help please! Through no fault of my own I find myself at 8pm not having had any dinner. Do I try to eat cooked stuff or just go for a marmite toastie (which I'm more likely to keep down)? Suggestins welcome (FWIW I managed my first banana in months at 5:30 )

Crazy afternoon of staff meeting, being locked out till Granny arrived home with DD, doing bath & bed, etc......

katser your stories of school remind me of how I felt at my last school. The deputy there made me cry on a frequent basis - such a bully (and a woman too). You've got to put LO first. You will get round to the mindset of taking advantage of your maternity rights instead of worrying so much about the school and job, but it will take practice! The kids will survive, the school will survive, and you need to make sure that you can too.

Sorry to hear some are beginning to feel low. I'm sure I was close to PN depression at one point after DD but it was never picked up properly so I'm not on any risk register. FWIW, I rarely have the energy nor patience to play properly with DD and find her dependency on me to do anything really irritating as I know she can play happily on her own. I'm getting to be a grumpy grots for no apparent good reason (I'm even less tired!) and should know better. We're all in the same boat...

Its disgusting that some of us have to pay for nuchals etc and some don't it should be one or the other!!
Kaster Try and relax and look forward to your scan-I didn't and wished I had now because it can ruin what should be a lovely experience! You will have to be careful around your friend, its so sad, I remember when I MC-I was just insanely jealous, thought why her and not me? she might be a bit funny at first but im sure you will handle it really well-I can tell you will be very kind and careful! Hope you feel better-nothing worse than ear ache!! Dont worry what everyone else thinks about you being ill-thats their ignorance and problem-you need to rest, as I thought to myself-its not just me im looking after now!!! Throw that at them!!!

Ideanna thanks for that - that's what DH said 'it's not just you stretching yourself by going to work when you're ill, it's my baby as well!' he was only joking in the way he said it, but he's right. And at the end of the day it's only a job. It's awful hobnob how women can be total bullies isn't it. I actually think I am terrified of mine. She can be so so unpredictable and unreasonable and that's her way of controlling people I think.

Wow am feeling lucky to get a free nuchal scan now - I had taken it for granted!

Hobnob - toast all the way. I have not had any proper dinner, through sheer laziness, nothing else, and have now had half a sandwich and am about to have some lovely buttery toast and jam. My fave!!

What do these mean....!!!
IYSWIM
FWIW
DD, DS etc-whats the D stand for-is it 'dear'?!!
And for those feeling low-I heard that we can get Pre Natal Depression, I felt really low the other day-for no reason but my mind was very irrational!! Its not a nic feeling-I hope it passes for you x

Thank you all again for the support

ninjacat I was on citalopram when 1st pg, gp wasn't happy for me to stay on it while pg but did say she could refer me to a consultant should I need it who would decide what if anything I could take!
I was seeing a councilor until a year ago and do have an open appointment to return (just need gp to fax her).

On the subject of scans we only get a 12 week scan for dating alone and 20 week for abnormalities, no nuchal mentioned here either, just bloods at 16 weeks to check for downs etc
We are though allowed to buy pictures at both, £5 for 6 pictures.

Glad to hear the sickness is calming down now for most of us.

Thank you all again for the support

katser I was so terrified of mine that even after getting married and moving 400 miles away, Someone who looked like her got out of a car across the road from my house, and I suddenly found myself on the dining room floor in case she saw me! How irrational...

had 2 cheese and marmite toasties - I seem to have them at least once a day at the moment.

ideanna go to 'useful stuff' on the menu and there's an acronym list - a lifesaver on here !

ideeanna

IYSWIM If You See What I mean

DD etc D is dear or darling

FWIW don't know that sorry

I feel really stupid now-what a goony-IYSWIM so obvious!!
You should all move to Truro, everything is FREE! Got free nuchals and pictures!! I want to complain for everyone! They should have some consistency!!!
Thanks hobnob-i'll go and have a look!!
Anyone feeling ill-hope you're not watching 'embarassing bodies'!!

At a guess - FWIW - For What It's Worth

Thanks ninja!! Looked at the list and feel educated! Just called DP a PITA-means pain in the arse!

Tigger I'm worried about you not getting the help you need due to the Birthing Centre not letting you go there if you have depression.
That sounds like a dreadful situation. I can't see how a hospital is going to cater any differently to your needs?
Are they overly concerned about post partum depression/psychosis? Or maybe they think we might be too depressed to push?
It makes me really angry. It's discrimination based on mental health. I thought we'd moved on a bit more than that.

Just looked at the abv list.
Had wondered what AF stood for.
Think BD is quite funny.

We paid £180 for our nuchal and combined bloodwork. I know that the NHS is supposed to now offer a kind of half-assed assessment of the nasal bone and measurement in this area, but I asked my GP about it and he said that given how poorly trained the NHS technicians were in this area, it was better to go private. So, off we went (and the consultant agreed with our GP, saying 'That was unusual honesty.') I do think it's ridiculous that so many trusts don't seem to want to fork out for the better equipment and training that the nuchal requires - it has much better predictive results than the triple, and you're not nearly so far along in the pregnancy when you get the results.

We interviewed a doula tonight, and I think I really like her (so that's a relief). When I asked her about the two hospitals in the area, she was able to give me her opinions on which one seemed - to her - to have the happier and more settled staff. (It wasn't the newer, snazzier one where I had DS. No kidding.) Am feeling a bit more hopeful...

Evening all.

So much chatting, it's hard to keep up! I've had an exhausting day. Got caught up in the chaos caused by workers on strike in my city. They cut off the two main roundabouts in the city, which totally disrupted all trafic. I was stuck in my car for 45 minutes at a standstill and then spent another 45 crawling towards my destination. What should have taken me 20 minutes took an hour and a half. I was VERY late for a GP appointment, but luckily she saw me anyway.

I've had a swollen foot and ankle for about 3 months now on and off and the GP is clueless as to what it can be. She's sent me off for tests to see if it's a clot, but the specialists basically laughed and said it can't be a clot because it's not hot. So I had no tests, and no progress. So now the GP has given me some horrible compression stockings to wear. SO uncomfortable. But they do seem to do the trick.

I'm slowly but surely getting the word out that we're expecting a baby. But DH is really nervous about telling his friends. He's the first of his group to settle down, get married and now have a baby. They don't see each other often, just talk on the phone, and he keeps bottling out of it. I keep threatening to scream "I can feel the baby move!" while he's on the phone

Glad to hear about good scans! Good luck to those with scans soon.

Morning all! I've just eaten my museli for breakfast to stop me feeling nausous and now I feel more sick - blurghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh!!!

I had a dream last night about my nuchal scan results . It's probably because we were talking about it on here yesterday! Oh, and I had a missed called on my home phone and on my mobile yesterday afternoon from number withheld which I am now convinced was the results and because they came back so quickly must be showing something. So, when I woke up from my dream I was trying to figure out if I would need to have an amnio if the tests require it or if I just wait and see. I talked to dh about it the other day and said that it wouldn't make a difference even if it came back as a high possibility anyway, but I guess it would be good to know and prepare. Hope that makes sense and doesn't sound horrible . Anyway, may just have been a dream, but am convinced now anyway.

Sorry, will stop blabbering on so early in the day!

Hi Everyone,

Good luck everyone for the scans. So good to hear all the good scans results.

Our bub's are growing day by day!

Hang in there if you have ms, mine is still ever present.

Bullies are horrid, in pregnancy we all have to look after ourselves and our bubs.

I am likely to get stick from a few very -ve people in the coy HR dept (yes in HR - thankfully I don't work in their dept).

I made a stand against their previous combined bullying behaviour alongside a powerful mger towards a pregnant e/ee and for not supporting a male colleague who only wanted a short amount of leave to be with his wife who had a mc. I have noted how they present pregnant women or sick e/ees as "problems" with despair.

Terrible isn't it. Luckily the senior mangt I report to have been supportive about my pgcy.

Even posting about these bullies this early in the am can cause anxiety, and I don't report to them. They have already suggested some reduction of my support team!) but my health and that of my bub is more impt.

southernbelle try not to worry, maybe you can call this am and ask that if they call you - they always leave a msg to let you know that they have called.

Take care all.

Morning all!
I got one picture from the first scan for free but the technican said next time I would have to pay 3gBP. She just thought it was expensive so I got one for free. I find it incredible that you can not get one from the first scan (forgot who mentioned this), I think this is the more important one.
I think I could have had the nuchal scan for free. The midwife just started to talk about it when she explained me my first scan. But I stopped her as I only wanted a dating scan. As we had already decided to keep the baby anyway, we thought it is better not to know about a probability because it can still turn out both ways.
Is there anybody else who didn't / doesn't want a nuchal scan?
southernbelle - I hope you will soon find out who tried to call you and that it has nothing to do with any bad results and I quite like what your husband said.

We are not having a nuchal on a kind of "we'll get what we're given" basis but I can see they can be very reassuring.
I'm also all for the right to choose. A good friend of mine had a late termination at 22wks when serious life limiting abnormalities were picked up on her 20wk scan. That was the right decision for them and when you've seen people in that much pain you could never judge their decision.

I'm off to the mw for booking in this morning. I'm supposed to know where I want to have this baby. I have no idea!

Wish me luck, I'm terrified that after being so ill that something has gone wrong. I think I might throw myself on my knees and beg for a 12wk scan.

I watched Embarrassing Bodies last night! I love that programme (DH hates it)!

I wonder how many women have suffered at the hands of a bullying female boss? I had a job for six months a few years ago (not sure how I stood it for so long) working for a woman who ran a Japanese translation and interpreting company and she was hell. Her office was in her house and she used to make me stay until 8pm most nights and babysit her children when she was off having flings with married men (I do not jest). She'd open the wine every evening at 7pm and expect me to join her EVERY NIGHT. I didn't want to get home drunk every night. She also would try to make me do her ironing and I refused and she'd do the guilt thing on me: I'm a single mother and I need help and you are refusing to help me! I pay you to work for me! I still have dreams about her sometimes. She was hell.

Cies sorry to hear about your swollen foot. The compression stockings will hopefully keep it at bay, albeit not in a fashionable way!

southernbelle feeling sick is pants! I still can't eat anything more than a ginger nut and apple for breakfast. Sooooo boring.

Sorry my last message is in reply to ursigurke just to give it some context.

SouthernBelle - try not to believ in your dreams. I have had horribly vivid ones since being pregnant that all spell doom and disaster, I think it is a way of working through our fears. Good luck with the results.

We chose not to go through with a nuchal/bloods for ds but perfectly understand why others make a different decision.

Can't believe others are having a hard time at work. How horrible! I'm struggling too, as there are a lot of people pregnant at my work so it's become a dirty word and they are making v few concessions for any of us. It has really got me down over the last few weeks as I don't like creating a fuss but I feel I couold be making myself ill and need to stand up for the poor little thing trying to hong on in there! Isn't incredible it's 2009 and we meet all these problems!

Speaking of work!! Have a good day

Good morning ladies

Great to hear all these fab scan results!It's such a worrying time, I'd love to just fast forward a month or 2 so we can feel baby moving, it's just nice to have the reassurance.

I have my 12wk & NT scan today at 11.40am. Have fingers crossed all is ok, had scan at 10wks and all was fine but there is always that doubt there.

Also have to take dd and ds with us as nobody to have them so that should be fun

Hope those with MS are feeling slightly better now. Luckily mine wore off a couple of weeks ago and since then have just had a few mild episodes, nothing near as bad as it was before thank goodness.

It's the tiredness that's getting me now. It gets to 2pm and I can't keep my eyes open. Typically though thats the time when dd and ds are usually wide awake and full of beans. Have tried getting them to change nap times but they don't seem to agree!

And does anyone know where the lovely sunshine has gone!? It's so dark, cloudy and windy now. I was loving the few days of sun we had, made everything seem so much better.

Well hope you all have a nice day, hopefully I will be back around lunchtime with good news

when do the happy hormones kick in...........anyone else feel grumpy?! ready to strangle dh yesterday, had appt at hospital yesterday, didn't mind he didn't come to that as was just blood tests etc but did he even remember and ask how it went..did he hell...of course if it was to do with any aspect of a football match he would def remember every aspect...grrhh..

Grrrr weston that sounds VERY familiar. I had a shouty rant at dp this morning, apparently I wasn't smiling and looked miserable so I should just "cheer up" and "take a chill pill"

Errrrrrrrr maybe I am actually a bit worried about today but has he actually mentioned the scan once?! I think we all know the answer to that All he has said is he will be back to give me a lift. I've no idea if he is even planning on coming in or not we shall see..........

Sorry dh is being a pain. How did your appointment/bloods go?

Ninjacat - I am also for the right to choose and it must be a really difficult decision. I agree you shouldn't judge people who decide to terminate a pregnancy. (Well, I judge those who use abortion as a sort of contraception but I hope that is only a very limited number)
But I disagree that nuchal scans are reassuring. They can't tell you for sure if your child has a genetic problem or not. In any case it is just a probability. So even if you get a very low probability your child could still be born with the down syndrom. And if you have a very high probability it could still be a healthy child. So I think, I would worry constantly about the number that I have got. As far as I know, only the amnio can tell for sure. And as this is an examination with a risk of miscarriage, I chose not to even start with the nuchal scan as I agreed with my husband that we would keep that child anyway. I think, if you know for sure you would keep it, it's better not to get started with those examinations.

It is actually an interesting question how many examinations and appointments you should have during your pregnancy. I was very shocked that you are left alone until the first trimester is over (and the reason for it still shockes me, they just don't want to waste time as the risk of mc is high during this period) but in the end I think, too many examinations make you just more nervous.

Sorry for all those with bullies at work, especially if they are your bosses. It must be terrible. You spend so much time at work, it is really important to get along well with people working with you.
It just made me realise how lucky I am with my colleagues and my boss, even if I sometimes complain about them for little things.

Cies - at least the stockings seem to help. My sister had to wear them throughout half her pregnancy and even partly in summer. What colour are they? She had black ones and if you didn't know it almost looked like leggings, so actually quite fashionable

Sorry for the long post, I just don't want to get started with housework