Due May '09 - wave your bum in the air, like you just don't care !

[Tummum]

Here we go !

ouch at birth backwards!

not looking forward to it forwards never mind backwards!

Note to self - must try to relax and stop worrying

Sorry about all those of you feeling down at the moment - hope it gets better soon.

spangle its great to see you back Harvey is sssooo cute! wonder if I'll be next?

birth backwards In out, in out, shake it all about. [snigger]

okay - I need some opinions - Am I being selfish?

I was due to be looking after DH daughter this week which was fine when I had 3wks till due date but as I've now only got a week to sort out the house, clean, bulk cook and try to rest, relax, sleep etc, we have asked PIL is they can look after her. They have said that's not a problem which is a great help. So we've got her tommorrow and overnight then they're going to pick her up Tuesday and look after her for the rest of the week, we are all meeting up on Thursday night for a meal.

So then I'm going into hospital Sat morning to be induced - fingers crossed! MIL wants DH to leave me in hospital and meet up with stepdaughter for a few hours. I don't really want to be left in there on my own.

This is my first baby and I am really nervous, I know it could take ages to all kick off as it were. I've already suggested that if I should have had the LO by Sunday afternoon they come and see us in hospital with stepdaughter so that she can see her little bro/sis b4 she goes back to her mum.

So what do you think? Selfish cow?

Be honest - I can take it

louby Absolutely not.

looby no, I don't think that you're being at all selfish. It's your first baby/labour and you're obvously a bit nervous and don't want to be left alone - totally understandable. However, perhaps as a compromise you could suggest you play it by ear on Saturday - depending on how they induce you (am assuming prostin gel to start with?) this can take a long time to take effect and you may need it repeated again before anything happens. So you may find yourself in hosp reading a magazine with nothing much happening for a while on Sat and in that case maybe your DH could go and meet her for a couple of hours / lunch or something on the basis that if you have any contractions starting up etc the ward call him and he comes STRAIGHT BACK IMMEDIATELY. Obviously the opposite scenario may happen whereby they induce you on Sat morning and you've had the baba by lunchtime (unlikely, yes but possible) in which case different scenario altogether.
Anyway sorry for huge post, but no you're not being selfish at all. Your baby, your Dh, your induction, it's a BIG DEAL that you have the support you need. Best of luck x x

Have just read my post - crap - I do sound selfish

Oh and whoever was talking about names, I like Suzannah a lot. Met a lovely suzannah recently.

looby No, you're not selfish at all. You and your own baby on the way are more important. You need to get ready and it sound's like your PIL understand that.

Hey, spangle welcome back. We can't wait to hear more about the birth. Baby H looks cute as well. Sounds like you're getting on really well with the business of motherhood. Hopefully he'll start waking for his feeds soon and then you can start with the feeding on demand.

frazzled My dh would say that sort of thing, generally when I say I want something savoury to eat but don't know what or if I'm stupid enough to say I want something to suck when I've got a sore throat.

blotted Your ds made me laugh with wanting to see the birth video backwards. Wouldn't want it to go that way in RL.

I've just eaten half a tub of B&J ice cream while watching the no1 ladies detective. I had no choice, because it was frozen solid and I couldn't just scoop a bit out.

Right, bedtime now. I need to recover from last night's late film.

I just remembered I still have to lock up the chickens. It's dark and I'm already sort of half dressed, because my jeans were digging in while I was sitting down

looby no you don't

although, you know, reading my post back I think if it were me I'd not want DH going anywhere just in case it kicked off suddenly and fast. And if I was going to be sat on the antenatal ward waiting for something to happen I'd want some company. Maybe I'd play it by ear but make it very clear that your labour is the main priority - duh obviously! and if you need him to stay then he needs to stay. You might find you are happy for him to go out for a little while if nothing happens at first? God I am waffling now. What does he think?

Oh and looby agree with frazzled about keeping playing it by ear on saturday. More than likely nothing will happen until at least the evening, but of course you never know. You might be one of those lucky ones who go into labour straightaway.

Actually, as she's your dh's daughter she'll have the same visiting rights as a full sibling, so she could even come and keep you both company in hospital for a bit. Maybe you could go to the hospital cafe or something (don't know what your hospital lay out is like) and have a drink and a snack together.

Hi Looby- I felt i should post before i go to bed. I don't think you are being selfish.

Yes, induction can take a long time, but that doesn't mean you should be on your own through it! I think as you are meeting up on the Thursday night for a meal, then its not like you won't be seeing your stepdaughter during the remainder of the week.

That being said, you may find you are OK about DH disappearing for a few hours, but i don't think you can say until you are in the hospital, so you could say to your PIL that it might be an option, but can't make a commitment either way until the day. For example, when I had my DS I went in for my planned cs at 7am. DH and I spent 2 hours just waiting watching breakfast TV. Then we were taken to a private room and told it was likely we wouldn't be in theatre until the afternoon. I decided i'd rather try and sleep or rest at least (been up early and was nil by mouth so wanted to pass the time) so sent DH off, saying to be back for noon. They then came back around 10.30 saying theatre was ready and to get DH back. Luckily he got back by 11ish but it was a bit of a panic as he didn't answer his mobile as he was driving. Therefore i guess what i'm trying to say is you may decide you are ok without him if nothing seems to be happening, but i guess it depends how far away PIL are and how long it would take for him to get back if you needed him. I don't think you are being unreasonable.

belgian sorry, sniggering at the thought of you streaking around half-undressed in the dark shocking your chickens!
Oh and your DH and mine sound like they are on the same planet (vile) - his favorite saying when in that kind of mood is 'do you like fruit?' Barf.

belgian good excuse re: B&J ice cream

thanks belgian frazzle jennster

I have already said to MIL about playing it by ear re: DH meeting up with DD. She just keeps going on about it To be honest with you all I am bricking it about being induced.

Altho I do want stepdaughter to meet her little bro/sis as soon as possible after the birth as I don't want her to feel left out.

It took me so long to type that everyone else got in there first! Anyway, hope my post is still useful.

what is it with our DH's are they related? When I've got a sore throat mine says do you want some of my special medicine?

spider naevi Does any body know if they disappear after birth? Not had them before.

looby barf!

thanks pula

all your posts are helpful. thanks everyone

Sounds like your MIL is being unreasonable......obviously a long time since she had a baby then!
I think belgian's suggestion about getting DD to come to sit with you in the hosp is a good one - then if nothing is happening you could go get lunch/tea whatever in the canteen at the hosp and she might be quite excited about being 'involved'. Or if it's a nice day you could go for a walk in the grounds or whatever (assuming it's a hosp that has some nice outside space - some do, some don't I guess).

Anyway I'm off to bed. I live in hope of a good night sleep.

ugh looby special medicine - that's grim. Sounds like they are all related

my DH is very unimpressed with my maternity and nursing bras

keeps asking when I'm going to wear my basque again!

wait till he sees my after the birth knickers!!

I decided to go for BIG BIG pants hopefully big enough to cover CS wound should it come to that