Bleu, we have found that finances at Maison Boffin PLC work best if only one person is in charge and takes full responsibility. We also set up a special current account with all the bills on direct debit, and we both sweep a proportion of our incomes into it via standing order to make sure there are no final demands or nasty letters.
One evening a month the designated family financier sits down and checks statements, seeks out better interest rates, files paperwork and so on, whilst the other partner makes tea at regular intervals and also makes suitably supportive noises.
To reboot this situation, if you gather up the paperwork from the last financial year in a big carrier bag, and spend an afternoon putting it in category and date order all over the floor, then you will be able to see what is going on and sort things out so they are less stressful. He does not really need to explain anything as it will be obvious.
Then create one clear A4 plastic folder for each category - electricity, phone, gas, childcare, car, PAYE, Schedule D, possible claimable expenses, etc and file them in a portable A-Z box file for that tax year (Tesco do a value basics one for about a fiver).
Then make a list of your utilities and regular payments and set up direct debits straight away. You can also set up an online savings account and sweep a small amount of money into there for Christmas and vacations, if you like.
I am a bit of an ostrich when it comes to money sometimes, but I have to say organising it like this has made me and DH a lot happier.