Due May 2009 - The 2nd thread... our pregnancy-addled brains can't think of anything wittier!!

[SpangleMaker]

Here you go

good luck with your scan.. could be the nerves making the ms worse?

good luck with your scan.. could be the nerves making the ms worse?

Probably - I'm so pathetic. Other half was in a foul mood this morning too which didn't help so I was narky as hell to him too!

FiK- Are you a Fiona? I am.

Good luck with the appt LoobyLou - will be thinking of you

My DP is becoming increasingly non-communicative and annoying at the mo. I know it is because he is trying to process and come to terms with all the potential changes this baby will bring, aswell as desperately looking for a better job and getting stressed about it, BUT - he doesn't understand that PG get tired / nauseous / don't want to eat fattening M&S pies and don't want to drop everything at his command to wheel full bins round the alleyway to the front of the house for collection .

When I try to talk to him, even to make light conversation, he just blanks me or interrupts with a comment that shows he is not listening at all If I couldn't talk about PG worries and symptoms on MN, I think I would explode, as he simply won't listen to even basic stuff. I tried to talk to him about do we / don't we go for the Nuchal scan last week and he wouldn't listen to that either Last night, he got out of bed and went into the other room, claiming he wanted to watch the snooker but it wasn't even on at the time ! I enjoyed the good nights sleep with a bed to myself but do feel he is withdrawing from me.

Oh well, think I'll just give him some space for a couple of days and see what happens.

MEN ! such a shame sometimes that we need them at all !

Had my day off yesterday so didn't reply but thanks for all the welcomes .

Runningmonkey nice to hear someone in same boat although not nice for you too. Anxiety is never far away! Just want to get to the scan and be able to relax. Worst at bed time so sleep's a bit rubbish.

So exciting to see so many others in so much the same boat and getting to their scans. I've about 3 weeks to go til I get mine and I've never wished time away so much! Massively envious of all of you who've had yours!

Was seriously windy and bloated but it's calmed down now and have felt sick but not been sick, about the same as with my 1st I think. Tender boobs and expanding waitline tho.

Can anyone recommend good mat' jeans that are long (inside leg around 33")? Also decent work trousers that are long too. For some reason mat' trousers seem to be only for ladies with 29-30" leg.

Febes yes I'm a Fiona too

jools I agree with dandy... but from personal experience with DH a few years ago when his job was pants it's so hard to get them to open up. He was quite irrational for a while with the stress and everything I said wasn't right... even if I was agreeing with a comment he'd made!

He was a bit depressed about his job/weight/age/life and we were both not eating very healthily... I dug out my nutrition book and it said omega3's &omega6's helped with depression. As he didn't really like oily fish I said we should all start taking multi vitamins in a bid to be healthier so I bought in a supply of multi vits with xtra omega tabs and at every dinner time I said 'oh time for vitamins' and we both had them. You know what It really helped him... and me too as I'd been skipping meals being so busy dealing with DS1.

He even started taking them as a daily habit and it got to the stage I could tell when he'd run out! As the moodyness returned.

These days he has a more interesting job without the stress of being made redundant at any time & we eat a much better diet... tried the low GI last year and it stuck... loads of fruit & veg, healthy carbs and lean meats and fish. He lost weight with it and now doesn't seem to need the omegas either

Being PG is more than enough on its own without added guff. If its finances stressing him out... let him know you'd be happy in a cardboard box as long as you were together & when you see a window of opportunity to chat just go for it...

Hi can I just say also to Febes that men aren't like us in that if they're worrying about something they don't talk about it, they just go off into their 'cave' and try to work it out themselves. I know it's a bit stereotypical and frankly pre-historic, but that's the way it is. My ex husband was a bit like that when I was pg with our son. Your body and mind are going thru so much change when pg but nothing has changed for the man, except th thought they have to be responsible for someone else, life will be turned upside down, they won't be centre of your world anymore etc etc. Unless they're the rare breed of man who longs for kids and can't wait (don't know any)then they feel pretty insecure and unfortunately as you're the person carrying the 'cause' they can't tlk to you about it. It's a great shame because I feel they miss out on so much by being so negative and distant but chances are, eventually he will come around. Meantime, you may just have to look inwards and trust yourself to cope - and keep talking to your friends on MN who seem like a great bunch to me!

I wonder also if you have any friends who's other halves he's close to who could (when you've announced it all) have a chat with him, see if he'll be swayed by another empathetic bloke who can tell him it's all gonna be OK...

Actually I meant Jools (sorry I am rubbish!). Don't know my own name today....

Jonesy based on my experience last time..

Best work trousers were from Crave, that do long ones and unfinished ones that are even longer!!
Jojomamanbebe has the odd pair in extra long.
Topshop also do some of their jeans style in 34".

For now I would just get slightly bigger trousers as they will be so useful after the birth and I know I got sick of my maternity wear, all 3 pairs of trous that were long enough...

Thats ok Jonesy I need all the help with DH I can get. No serious DH is a honey now but Jools with my first PG DH was a prat he took no/very little interest and withdrew from me. We have talk alot about it since then.

For me it was all consumming reading baby books and feeling sick with MS and thinking the world should have stopped for me.

For him it was a wife who turned into a moaning tired bitch who wanted him to read baby books all the time.

Luckily he is the best dad in the world and is so supportive now and has been better this pregnancy so far asking me when the scan is etc. But also I have chilled and just got on with it this time.

I guess for women it is all consumming and for men it just isn't real until the baby is there.

My advice use MN to get support for now and try not to let PG become everything that you tslk about with DP. I know that it is everything to us but most men just don't get it.

Hi All. I am back from the scan and all is well!! Baby was swimming around shaking arms and legs. It turns out I'm a little further on that first thought 11+4. Due date 3rd May.

Jools - I really feel for you. All I can say is that my DH has, in the past, done this type of thing and it has turned out to be nothing to do with me! Usually it's been because he's horribly stressed at work and hasn't told me, or he's feeling depressed about stuff - again he doesn't usually tell me until it gets really bad then it all comes tumbling out. He behaves like an arse while this is going on and I (used to ) get really angry. I used to think it was something I'd done and our marriage was in trouble - I even threw him out of the house once as I thought there was no point carrying on. That time it turned out he was being victimised at work by a boss who was making his life hell(who was dreadful and later sacked). Once he told me this, I said hand your notice in tomorrow and he did, got another job and hasn't looked back. Just wish he'd told me weeks before! But men usually bottle things up don't they.
My advice (FWIW) is to try to sit down and get him to open up. Don't talk to him about the baby all the time, as it will make him feel like you're nagging and piling on the pressure (- until you find out what the root cause is, obviously). Difficult for you not to, as it's central to your life at the mo, but maybe it's just making him feel even more panicked. It's difficult in the current economic climate to feel positive about things so maybe everything is just getting to him.
Sorry am rambling but I think he probably needs to be reminded that he can confide in you and that he has your support and back-up. He might just need to be told this - men can be pretty thick sometimes!!!!
Once you get to the root of the problem he will hopefully be able to see how much you need his support too and will reciprocate.
Am sure things will sort themselves out - they usually do.
Take care. Hope this is useful (sorry if it's not - just thought it sounds a bit like what I've been through in the past).

Thanks alapala, will look up Crave for sure. I was lucky that there was a shop in Reading where I live called Swells which was just brilliant and had all the best makes of stuff from Europe so I got great work clothes and even passed it all on to my sis in law after. But Swells is gone (to Nottingham!) so am stuck without it. Next does long length for non PG people at 33" but long length in their mat range is 31" - how does THAT work!!!

Congrats loobylou! You must be on a high!

alapala thanks so much for recommending Crave, it's exactly what I was after! Will get a couple of key work pieces from here when time comes.

Just wanted to say I've found a MS cure which is relatively healthy too- banana chips.

Couldn't stomach proper banana, but these really seem to be working. Maybe I need to find some more healthy ones and buy in bulk as these have "sugar" listed as the third ingredient. Problem is they are going to run out soon...

Whoopee loobyloo and being further along is an added bonus.... the MS should be over even sooner

BTW what is DH and DP..?

Just back from a lovely lunch out with my parents and DS. It's my parents anniversary of 43yrs we tried a new resturant and the food was delicious. I've eaten too much and now feeling a bit queezy I knew I shouldn't have had that last sauteed pototoe but everything was just so tasty I couldn't help myself! Off for a lie down and hopefully I'll be able to persuade DS to rest with me... fingers crossed...

Is it Dear Son, Dear Daughter, Dear Husband etc etc???

Yeap and Dear partner. Took me a while to click on to that too. There is an acronyms button at the top which tells you some but some are still a mystery.

hi all.
I'm on my 3rd big bowl of pasta with olive oil, garlic, tomato and salt... am craving salt.

I've just read that pregnant women just need 200-300 calories extra - is that right? I'm definitely eating twice my usual amount but I'm just listening to my body. 300 calories sounds too little. and I'm defn not gaining excessive weight, if anything, I look much better than I did pre-pregnancy.

I figure my body knows what it needs and it's definitely big bowls of pasta right now!

and Peartiser. Appletiser won't do. gotta be pear.