Due June 08: less of the hens hatching, more of the cows milking?

[bitofadramaqueen]

Lets hope it's not too long before everyone is hatched and milking season is in full swing!

DLM - my ds (22 months) has been surprisingly good with our dd. He's actually quite protective and likes to make sure she has a blanket covering her and gets me if she cries. Plus this afternoon when his grandparents arrived to take him out he went and got her carry cot and folded back the covers ready for her to go in. Our only trouble is that he wants to give her all his toys and food/drink! But we have been making an effort to do things with him and get him to help out with her, i.e. get nappies for me when we are doing nappy changes etc. To be honest I expected him to be much more clingy as he got very mumsy before she was born.

I was also told to massage with olive oil or almond oil and have been using this on Emma's dry patches.

LOL at the feeding/milk spraying episodes. I also have problems with getting infacol into Emma - she hates the taste of it. I find she winds better if I sit her on my knee and pat her back or do the bicycling legs followed by this.

Explosive poo's - Emma did her first one on Granddad yesterday!!!!! Fortunately he's quite good about this sort of thing and saw the funny side of it!

Essie - well done for getting out, I hope you enjoyed your lunch. That really is a kind offer for the sling.

As for how you manage with two - well the second one seems to just fit in. I think it really helps that you know what to expect and you also don't have to keep thinking am I doing this right etc as you have tried and tested methods that work for you. So whilst at times it's hard i.e. when the older needs feeding and so does the baby but it's not as bad as I was expecting - so far. BUt I'm still waiting for one of those days where everything goes wrong and I end up a dribbling wreck on the sofa!

Afternoon all

Thanks to all those who gave advice about cranial oestopaths. Joshua really has been suffering at times so I'm hoping some treatment will help him. We're off to see a traditional oestopath at 4pm, he's the dad of a school friend of ds1 so I know the family and know he's got a good reputation. He's also £25 instead of £39 which is what I paid at local clinic when I had my pelvis seen.

Sorry to all the others having problems with bfing, wind and whatever other problems.

Good luck to those still waiting to pop, have we any news from the weekend induction ladies?

I feel bad for lack of posting but I'm still finding I can lurk to a point but typing a message is very hard as usually I'm rushing off to sort something whilst JJ naps. Anyway, thought I'd send a quick message now before folding some washing and hanging more up, then it'll be time for the school run (PLEASE don't rain again!!)

Can I just ask you for your thoughts on this sensitive issue........a friend of mine (happens to be a mnetter so I've been sort of hiding too) came to visit me when Joshua was 4 days old. I'd been very happy since the birth and still was although my milk had just come in big time so I was feeling very hot and swollen in my boobs, just like with ds1. Anyway, this friend was at my house for 1 hour and in that time, made 8 negative comments which made me feel like a crap mum.......1) 'oh, he should be in a babygro and not proper clothes' (they were very comfy and not tight clothes and i'd run out of babygros at that point) 2) went on and on again about a photo of my 5 yr old son on facebook that she felt shouldn't be on there as he was naked in birth pool (I'd already told her we're all different and it's not an issue for me, he won't get harmed as a result but she wouldn't have any of it!), 3) 'please just cuddle him, i know you'll be childminding again soon but please just love and cuddle him during this time' (errrr, I was doing nothing BUT cuddle him apart from she was having a cuddle right at that point) 4) she disapproved of any use of the bouncy chair at this point and said he should only lay flat on moses basket when not held, I explained that he LIKED it as it was a nice position for his wind and at those times of pain, he couldn't stand being flat! - it's not like I used the chair often anyway 5) saw me breastfeeding and told me i was doing it all wrong and then asked (in demanding way) if she could show me how it should be done properly and then proceeded to put my baby in the 'right' position and grabbed pillows etc etc (I was managing fine, just tilted him a different way to get on etc. as he'd just drown in my milk at that point and would prefer to be how i put him 6) went on about how I should be in bed with my baby....I soon pointed out that the only reason I wasn't is because SHE wanted to visit and therefore I'd got up for her (even though she turned up an hour late so I could have had an extra hour in bed 7) went on about the jaundice I'D mentioned and started acting like she thought I wouldn't do anything about it and it upset her and worried her when people don't do things (it was me who'd been researching on the internet about what to do, the causes etc.) and wait for it.....the biggy......this REALLY freaked me out....8) she mentioned her overwhelming urge to breastfeed my baby (she's still breastfeeding but her dd2 is almost 2 now so no longer a baby). She said 'I feel like I'd be helping you and your baby as I'd be like getting rid of your poison (i.e. my overload of milk making me sore) and helping Joshua . It's like she thought MY milk wasn't good enough

What are your thoughts? I burst into tears after she'd gone as of course I didn't need to hear all that when hormones kicked in. But I felt sick with the comment about breastfeeding and just don't know how I can face her now. WWYD? I haven't spoken to her since, just a very short email but without the friendly kisses etc. at the end as I found the whole visit very upsetting tbh.

Oh gosh, is that the time. Sorry to have gone on Really must dash or I'll be late for school.

looney no advice about your friend, just big hugs on having to deal with that. some people just like the sound of their own voice (i am one of those people)

Isaac saw the hv this morning and is now a monstrous 8lb 13 or 4kg - that means he has put on an ounce everyday!!!!! I have a monster

Another question from me - tried to give a bottle of ebm earlier, and he screamed but did take almost 2oz's. is this normal, has anyone else any experience to share? only expressing as he is feeding every 2 to 3 hours and dh wants to be able to help out in the evenings

quick post as must get ot school..Looney I'm not surprised your friend upset you. I'd find the bfeeding thing downright creepy, tbh. I think whilst Joshua is still so little and you are still in the post-natal phase I'd go for the courageous standby of avoiding her - a confrontation would upset anyone with all the hormones we all have right now.

Looney - full sympathy. I had a similar 'friend' who was a real bitch to me when I told her I was pregnant because I wasn't thrilled enough (I suffered from Antenatal Depression). I was told I was lucky to have a miscarriage (previously) because I would never cope with heavy periods like her, I didn't deserve a baby because I didn't want it enough, I should have been more careful, I was selfish to consider taking maternity leave, I would never cope with childbirth etc etc. I was desperately distressed by this (hormones don't help - although tbh I can't see me dealing with that at any stage - and I think your friend was totally unreasonable too).
I was going to confront her etc, but DH told me there was no point, because you can't change people or their (silly/hurtful) point of view, and he told me to let it go. But avoid her!

I wish I'd said something at the time - I'm sure you do too - but I think DH is right. I try not to dwell on it (I did, though, for my whole pregnancy and during labour I shouted out that I didn't deserve a baby - because she said so! Gas&Air, eh?) but it still bugs me. It's her problem though, not yours.

Oh, and the breastfeeding thing? In my opinion - which doesn't matter or count for anything - she's a freak and totally unnatural . I feel sick at the thought of someone else breastfeeding my baby.

Oh, CRAP. Iestyn has woken up. I've tried everything to get some sleep (me and him), we've taken a good walk, he slept, but now he's stirring...I NEED SOME SLEEP!

Looney your friend sounds like she has some 'issues' of her own to deal with - not surprised she knocked you off balance! Any of her comments on their own would have been enough for me to obsess about, let alone the Really Really Strange breastfeeding one atthe end. I would stick with the avoiding strategy too - you don't need to be dealing with that sort of thing at this stage. Some people are very odd.

DLM ta for the massage tip on expressing, I'd forgotten about that from last time. I should be fine once I start using the machine, but don't want to bother with pump expressing until I'm doing full feeds, and won't do that till a few months in - the hand expressing is just to get rid of the v. fast letdown spray. I am sure I will stick with the bf as I know for me it's the easy option in the long run - my biggest stress is housework, esp. washing up and keeping kitchen clean, and using formula would just add hugely to that. It's just getting through these early weeks ... can't wait till I can just get a boob out, slam her on and get back to the computer!!

My ds was great about the baby for the first couple of weeks but is now getting more demanding - wants to be picked up when she is in the sling, more tantrums, etc. Hope it doesn't get worse before it gets better ...

Hedgehog if you don't think his latch has changed the new soreness could be from thrush, check his mouth for white patches or get your hv or gp to have a look.

Harder day here today, Caitlin cried on and off all morning and wouldn't settle in moses basket at all - happy to sleep in my arms though ... eventually I gave up and went to bed with her and we slept 3 hours. She's dozing on and off in the sling now. So much for my newborn sleep plan ... will keep trying to put her down awake and let her learn to get herself off, but it's much harder than I thought it would be!

Hi all

Re the booze/ breast feeding debate, the research is quite new, and does counter old advice to have a drink to relax...
Anyhoo, here's a link if anyone's interested. I deffo express more on days I don't drink but I guess everyone's different.

Second nightmare night with Storm, but I think I've identified the cause - she's had awful wind, and this morning, 36 hours after I had chilli (DH made it with no actually chilli as I was worried about the spiciness, oh the irony) her nappies smelt of it, and she's been farting a lot - I think it's the kidney beans and possibly beef too - another food to add to the list.

debs email me your address and I'll pop a couple of outfits in the post tomorrow. Neither quite as lovely as the one you have, but at least you'll have the option. Just post them back to me after the wedding - and don't worry if there are any poo stains!!! Also, can you let me know what the weather will be like (roughly) - I think I've picked stuff for the right climate but best to check. Email roseedotbrownatgmaildotcom

looney your friend is obviously jealous of you having a new baby and it's coming out in weird ways. And turning up an hour late when you have a new baby is unacceptable, even before she started with all the other crap. I'd wait till your hormones have settled (a week?) and then have a bloody word!

Storm now asleep on my shoulder, but really need to catch up on a nap myself as last night has knackered me, so bbfn.

libralady AFAIK tongue tie is really straightforward to rectify and 'the snip' can make a big difference straight away. In fact when I first saw the bf counsellor with nipple pain it was the first thing she checked for and said she is always slightly disappointed when that isn't the problem, as it's such an easy thing to fix!

Ok, he's sleeping again, so a quick post.
Greenfairy that's a really useful link. With a brand new word for me to learn, which I'll have to look up - 'galactagogue'! It increases lactation - who was it on here who was trying to increase their supply? According to one link, try this: 'In humans common galactagogues are: caffiene, hops, fenugreek, fennel seed, blessed thistle, domperidone, alfalfa.' In fact, google 'galactagogue' and you'll get lots of ?useful links.

I'm going to be a bit more careful now. Although DH and I have something to celebrate tonight so I might chill a mini bottle of champagne...god, I sound like I can't give up!

I think I'm ok on most foods - I had a curry last night and he's fine (well, same as usual really!). I went for a Tarka Dal, though - keep it bland. Alas, it hasn't made me more regular. I think I have......a haemorrhoid. I get a teeny amount of blood, and it's a bit itchy there. Any tips?

Josie - there is 1 watcher on the sling now - so who knows. I didn't expect it to sell, really, because it's not a big brand name. Who knows! 1 day 20 hours to go!

Took Luke to the baby clinic today and had him assessed and he does indeed have a tongue tie. The Dr has referred him already and I am just awaiting a call from the hospital to let me know when. The clinic weren't sure if it would be done in Poole or Southampton, but I have since heard that I will have to take Luke to Salisbury (Odstock) to have the procedure done, but the good thing is they have said this is an urgent referal and expect it to happen by the end of the week!
When I heard the words Salisbury and Odstock it conjured up all the memories I had of being up there with DS1 2 years ago after his accident (he ended up with 7% of his face and body covered with 3rd degree burns and ended up with skin grafts)but I can't fault the hospital, they were fantastic, and of course this is a different scenario.
Anyway Salisbury has some lovely shops, so I may well get my retail therapy done.
Oh and Luke has gained another 2lb, so he is now over his birth weight which is fab news.
Right, off to express again......... and catch up to see if anyone else has popped.

Oh - I'm going to try Iestyn on a bottle of expressed milk this evening. So maybe I'll chill a magnum of champagne!!

looney, so sorry to hear about your 'friend' - definitely one to put on the "avoid at all costs" list I think.

I have a similar problem with my MIL - but unfortunately, being as she's related to my DH (though I struggle to understand how such an awful woman could have produced such a lovely man ) I can't avoid her.

She has spent 4 days telling me I'm pretty much doing everything wrong - feeding him too often, changing him too often, holding him too much. She went on and on and on about when he was going to start sleeping through the night (he's three fecking weeks old!), and told me that she used to put baby cereal in dh's food to make him sleep !

Last night was the final straw, as I was cuddling up with A, he was lying on my shoulder snuggling into my neck and she came over and took him off me without even asking and plonked him into his chair I was so furious I nearly hit her and had to leave the room to calm down.

How am I going to put up with this for the next god knows how many years?

Sponge - I think we've talked about this before! She really does sound like a nightmare. It's FIL I have issues with - but yes, like you say, how can they/he/she produce such a lovely man?!
I have an experimental day on Friday with my own MIL (but, also FIL isn't coming). It's so, so hard - because you can't be totally evil and deny all access but I don't know about you - I secretly wish I could... I really didn't want to see them this week alone without DH, but I've relented. All fingers and toes (and boobs which are pendulous again) crossed that there's no judgement, and no snatching or hogging of baby...

Alex not sleeping through the night, then? Oh, Iestyn is and he's only 3 weeks old. (Mad demented cackle of sleep-deprived woman rofl.) Yeah, right - I'm beginning to doubt I'll ever sleep again...

I take it all back about DD1 being fine. She has just thrown toys all over the place, wrestled with me for Thea's blanket, told me and DH to go away, called us stupid...and she does this every day (generally in the evening - she's napping less and sleeping better at night so silver linings etc etc). Oh, and she thrown her building blocks around the place as well.

DD2 is wearing a pink/orange/purple outfit from my most colourful friend. My friend is very very glamorous (she was the one everyone fancied at university. I was "the friend" ). My children and I are not very very glamorous although obviously we have marvellous personalities!

Essie, what are you celebrating? Have a drink for me.

Looney, your 'friend' sounds madder than a box of frogs. I would definitely avoid her! Weird breastfeeding thing - getting rid of your poison???!!!!

Oh, DH just home. Feeling really unwell. I hate it when he's ill

Oh, UDC, I'm not supposed to say because it's confidential, but what I can say is that DH has just heard that he's moving up a bit on the career ladder. Alas, it's going to be confidential information for some time - at least until January!!
Rolf don't quiz me (as someone who knows about these things) because I'm hopeless at secrets! DH is about to join the Selden Society as well, because he's keen to hobnob with Sir Igor Judge, particularly now that he's got that promotion (Judge, not DH! DH isn't moving that far up!!).

oh god, now DD1 has run outside and shouted at DS1 to f* off . In front of the v nice family across the road who DH and I are a bit scared of and who we think hate us as they hear us arguing. So now I feel like a white-trash potty-mouthed awful mother. And don't feel very well and am v tired.

Essie - congratulations .

Oh Rolf and you were having such a good day too, 2 year olds are hard work aren't they, I'm hoping that Ethan could maybe skip that period out!!

Congratulations to Mr Essie TGF - Thank you - I'll e-mail you.

looney - it's your friend that is looney not you, downright weird - avoid at all costs.

Boys woken up - I'll be back

Looney your 'friend' sounds anything but! I would avoid at all costs. Am completely gobsmacked about the breastfeeding comment.

Congratulations MrEssie - won't tell a soul - promise.

Right off now to try and remember who else has said what as I have the attention span of a goldfish at the mo..........

quick post, haven't finished catching up yet, but Charlotte Helen was born on Sunday (06/07/08) at 7.08am weighing 8lb exactly. (yah boo to all those RL people who kept telling me she was going to be a huge baby boy !) we got home today, and I'll post more soon but had a good experience on the whole!

Ok, if you all promise to keep things secret until it's official (Judicial Appointment folks need to get in touch and make it official, I think, or someone like the Lord Chief Justice, I dunno!) then I can reveal that he's been told he's going to be a Recorder (junior judge)!! And it's in Wales!

Amber, if you're there, Penguin, UDC and I are organising a meet up, next week - poss. Earlsfield, or Wimbledon, or we're flexible! Poor Penguin - multiple posts LOL!

Rolf - especially you on the secrecy front! Or any other lawyers/related-to-lawyers folks.

Rolf don't worry about the neighbours. Children pick up all sorts of behaviour/language at preschool. We a similar problem with DS1. We're not completely innocent ourselves, but do refrain from using such strong language in front of the children 99% of the time. However, there have been times...........but then again what do you do for the best, ignore it, or mention to LO you don't want them using such words. Sometimes if you hi-light the usage, it can make it worse.

Congratulations Laura, Isaac was also an 8lber and I was told he was going to be huge!!

Congratulations Laura. A lovely anme and a great weight. Wow seen her birth date 06-07-08 and her time of birth 07:08. LOL about being a whopper of a boy!