Due August 2021 - Third Trimester!

[Daffodil21]

Not totally up to date, sorry!

@wimbler - EDD 29 July, surprise 💛
@coffeeandrainbows1- EDD 4 August (but most likely July), Boy 💙
@Jessicapebbles - EDD 5 August (but having C-section at 39 weeks, so really July), Girl 💖
@Smurf123 - EDD 5 August (but likely to be July) 💛
@WhatEvenIsSleep - EDD 2 August, Boy 💙
@ready2020 - EDD 4 August, Girl 💖
@Xaxnxdxrxexaxandrews87 - EDD 4 August, Boy 💙
@Smushty14 - EDD 6 August, TBC 💛
@Rattyclife - EDD 6 August, TBC 💛
@Dia12 - EDD 8 August, Girl 💖
@Biscuitcat - EDD 10 August, surprise 💛
@ElonaWise - EDD 11 August, TBC 💛
@Runnergirl123 - EDD 11 August, TBC 💛
@PurplePansy05 - EDD 12 August, Boy 💙
@Srtdr - EDD 12 August, surprise 💛
@Daffodil21 - EDD 12 August, Boy 💙
@Inmypjsagain - EDD ???, Boy 💙
@BananaHammock23 - EDD 13 August, surprise 💛
@MrsB2019x - EDD 13 August, Girl 💖
@Magik01 - EDD 13 August, Boy 💙
@Aaaaa1519 - EDD 13 August, Girl 💖
@Carefree1 - EDD 15 August, Girl 💖
@DressyGerbera - EDD 15 August, surprise 💛
@lucyrp - EDD 16 August, undecided 💛
@BertieBotts - EDD 16 August, want to know! 💛
@WolfMother326 - EDD 17 August, surprise 💛
@Caz1226 - EDD 17 August, Boy 💙
@Lille4 - EDD 17 August, Girl 💖
@Redskinsucks - EDD 17 August, TBC 💛
@RockyRockyRoad - EDD 18 August, can't wait to find out 💛
@Smallbean27 - EDD 19 August, surprise 💛
@WatermelonKisses - EDD 20 August, surprise 💛
@Alittlexmasmagic - EDD 22 August, surprise 💛
@Millymay13 - EDD 22 August, TBC 💛
@Whatshouldbemyusername - EDD 22 August, surprise 💛
@LottSE20 - EDD 22 August, TBC 💛
@Notinthestarsigns - EDD 23 August, TBC 💛
@Winecoffeeteamum - EDD 23 August, Girl 💖
@LaceyMermaid - EDD 24 August, TBC 💛
@Fran919 - EDD 25 August, surprise 💛
@ava50x - EDD 25th August, Boy 💙
@Ghhh - EDD 25th August, Boy 💙
@northernsquirrel - EDD 26 August, surprise 💛
@LyraShaeLilly - EDD 27 August, Girl 💖
@ame88 - EDD 28 August, TBC 💛
@diamante11 - EDD 29 August, Girl 💖
@HopefulB - EDD 29 August, TBC 💛
@CountryGirl84 - EDD 29 August, TBC 💛

I had no idea they had different levels XD I will check what it says on the pack I have tomorrow! I just asked DH to get me maternity pads from the German equivalent of Boots and he asked the staff and they recommended them.

I always thought mine were normal but sounds like they might be slightly on the heavier side! First couple of days I wear the night ones during the day and change every time I go to the loo (which is a lot, even pre-pregnancy!) then switch to the normal winged daytime ones for the rest of the time!

@PurplePansy05 my nct teacher said that for most people with heavy periods, they tend to get lighter after you've given birth. I've no idea why but this was the case with me!
I guess the pregnancy/breastfeeding hormones reset your cycles.

Girls, honest question because I don't know if I'm being weird. AIBU to expect DH to express some interest in the birth? In a sense of anything really, how I'm feeling about it, what my preferred choice is, what his role is, how he can help...just anything? I feel very much left on my own and whilst he's probably doing this because he'd respect any choice I'd make, I don't necessarily feel happy about the fact there's not even a conversation about the birth. I've not seen him read a single book or ask a single question about it. What concerns me is that he's supposed to be my birth partner and if he knows nothing about what's to come then how would he advocate for me and DS if something goes wrong or if I'm not able to do it myself? How would he know what to do even if things go smooth?

We are doing NCT soon so he might learn a bit, but I can't help feeling disappointed and I don't trust he'd actually help me on the day in any way. Not to mention he hates confrontation, so I'm not really sure how he'd cope with raising any serious issues and requesting support. I don't know if I exaggerate because I'm hormonal and tired now and he's annoying me in general now, or whether he should actually step up. xx

Just came across this thread and thought people might like to read.

www.mumsnet.com/Talk/childbirth/4277276-postpartum-bleeding

@PurplePansy05 I would wait and see how he reacts to the NCT stuff. I know DH wasn't really interested in the birth prep and only kind of begrudgingly watched this online birth class video I found (and then kept joking around with all the exercises suggested) and I felt really frustrated about it too, he is usually incredibly supportive and I just found it weird that he didn't seem to care? But it turned out he did care, but it was more that he didn't see the point in learning stuff about it because he felt it would be a very much thinking on his feet, reacting to the situation as it comes kind of thing and it was. It was fine during labour. He supported me just fine without knowing loads of stuff about how things worked.

I think actually going to the class should help and if your leader is any good then they will get the dads discussing and thinking about things.

My DH is good at being assertive, but feels very strongly about going against any medical advice so probably wouldn't really speak up for me if I wanted to go against what they were saying - my ex was actually better in that regard, because he gave no shits about authority :o When they said the birth pool was out of order he just went and brute-force fixed it whereas DH would probably have gone "Oh no they said you can't use it". But DH is good at liasing so could help by explaining what they were saying to me / translating what I was trying to say to them.

Thanks @BertieBotts I’ve posted on there.

Re OH, mine isn’t massively interested in the detail of birth etc, but I do have confidence he can advocate for me. He’s very good at stats and risk management, so we’ve just made sure he understands my thinking on risks so that he can ask for the data/evidence around advice and then support me to make decision. I think it’s partly about managing expectations, @PurplePansy05 maybe think what his strengths are and how those could be used during labour and ask him to focus on that?

He's a wet blanket when it comes to difficult situations unfortunately, so that doesn't help at a time when quick thinking, being decisive and clear communication are key It's harsh, but true. I think it would be nice for him to be there, but he's not reliable in my eyes. xx

This is a really stupid question, but what sort of thing would they be likely to have to advocate for..? Assuming this is if things don't go to plan...

I think it’s important for birth partners to know your preferences so that if you’re in pain or struggling to communicate they can help and perhaps be a rational thinking person and voice for you. I found hypnobirthing really helpful for this. There are sections in the positive birthing company digital pack specifically for birth partners. Essentially they are there to support and whilst it can be difficult for them them to see the person they love in immense pain and/or scared I see their role as a calming strong presence in the room. I had an ELCS so slightly different but DH was great at keeping me calm and reminding me to do my breathing.

Nct will probably kick start him into thinking about it. Sometimes I think men don’t realise exactly what goes into childbirth until much closer to the event!

Yeah, exactly, I'm talking about pain management. I think I have some bad memories because DH called to ask for help when I was poorly going through one of my MCs and they totally fobbed him off at the hospital and I remember sitting there thinking if that was him going through it I'd be way more persistent not just take no for an answer. I wasn't great and couldn't even articulate that to him so really he should have picked up on things better and advocate for longer. But there we are, it's done and I don't want to go back there.

I just had a call from the hospital, unfortunately I somehow developed GD between weeks 29 and 33 😔 This comes as a big surprise, zero symptoms. I'm seeing a specialist next week now. Gutted 😔 xxx

@PurplePansy05 oh no I'm so sorry, I have my GTT tomorrow and am bricking it 😖 been reading the symptoms of it and I feel like I may have it too😔 I have extremely dry lips, I'm very tired, thirsty all the time and weeing lots- all of which can be just pregnancy things of course but I'm so worried. I haven't put on any weight though but. Have you had any symptoms? My bump is measuring above the 97th percentile too xx

Hello all, was glad to read about the positive 32 week scans for those who had them. I had mine this morning, following the disconcerting midwife visit earlier in the week when they told me my belly was measuring too small. The scan showed that everything is fine, my baby is in the 42% centile and he weighs 4.5 lbs, they were happy with this not at all concerned. So relieved!

@Jessicapebbles I missed your earlier reply - good that you can have another section and feel positive about it. I'm curious how your Crohns symptoms have been lately? I am going off my medication after this week because they're immunosuppressive and hoping that having my inflammation under control will last through the birth, but we'll see.

@PurplePansy05 so sorry to hear you've developed GD! Why did they do the test so late/how did they know? At least you don't have long to go with managing it.
Re: birth partners, my husband has been pretty handsoff about the birth too. I dragged him to a hypnobirthing class where he gleaned some things, but he's generally just so busy with work that he isn't super focused on the baby and the birth. We're going to some antenatal classes this Sunday and next, so I'm hoping to get more support. I also wrote up a birth plan and I want to go over it with him so that he can understand what his role is. It's pretty basic, but I made a list of 3-4 things he can do that are simple like make sure my plan is respected where possible if I can't speak/do it myself; support me by rubbing my back and helping me breathe through contractions, etc. Maybe you guys can make a plan together or look at one you've made? The NHS has a template that I just copied and added to.

@Daffodil21 it's good to have an advocate to express your wishes for whatever you do & don't want.
For example, you definitely don't want an episiotomy and would rather tear naturally for example. At this stage in labour you might not be clear headed enough due to medications/exhaustion etc to tell them this yourself. Your partner can then discuss with the obstetrician/MW on your behalf x

@lucyrp I had absolutely no symptoms. I mean, I am tired but I know that's because I don't sleep well with my achy hip, that's been the case for many weeks. There's also so much going on in addition to the pregnancy now that I know this is the result.

I've put just over a stone at 28+5 and I don't think much since, only baby weight. I still fit in some of my pre-pregnancy clothes, stretchy or loose of course, but I really didn't baloon.

They did the GTT for me at 28+5 which came back normal. This was because my BMI was 30 at booking. Again though, I did sports for years before so BMI in my case isn't fully representative.

@WolfMother326 they sent me for OGTT on Tuesday because my son is now measuring at 95th centile, up from 50th at 28+5 and they were concerned he might be growing too fast because of GD. It now turns out they were right.

I'm so disappointed this has happened. Will have to do whatever they suggest now, but it's a pain for life and future pregnancies too, I'll have to be careful not to develop type 2 diabetes post-pregnancy. It's also a highly likely C-section now as I decided I do not want to be induced. xx

@PurplePansy05 my bump has been measuring above the 97th percentile since my first measurement at 28 weeks and the MW said she doesn't think I have it but I have to have the test anyway but I'm so anxious. Yeah I've only put on 9 pounds since my pre pregnancy weight 😬 what have they said are the options for you now going forward ? Xx

Ugh @PurplePansy05 of course, that's so disappointing. I'm sorry you have to deal with this all now. I hope you get good support and the adjustment isn't too rough x

Thank you girls. It will be ok, tbh, I've been eating well throughout the 2nd and 3rd trimesters, if I need to cut out all sugar completely for the final 6 weeks then so be it. Luckily, my glucose levels are not through the roof so maybe moving more and eliminating sugar completely will do the trick, DS's growth will slow down and we'll get to a planned section.

They may also put me on metformin. I will know more next week as I have an appointment at the diabetes clinic so will be able to let you know more then @lucyrp. Don't get too worried though, this is a strange one, some women develop it and some don't and symptoms or lack thereof can really mean nothing! It's all hormonal. If they test you now it's a good thing, it will inform your birth options and help with managing your LOs growth. It's obviously disappointing to have it, but I reckon it's best to know and get on with what's needed. xx

@PurplePansy05 oh what a pain about the GD, I'm sorry to hear that 😓 I'm not an expert, but is developing it with no symptoms positive, or does that not have a bearing? A couple of the other mums in my NCT have GD, and I know they're finding it really useful being able to speak to each other, I wonder if there would be a way to find someone else going through something similar if that might help you too?

In terms of for the birth, DH hasn't been very proactive in asking what he can do to help, but he's been quite willing to talk about it when I want to and has watched the hypnobirthing videos with me. Our NCT spoke quite a bit about partner's role during birth, so hopefully as Bertie says starting that might get him thinking. It's stressful though isn't it, feeling as though you're having to take on the whole mental load of pregnancy and birth (especially for you with managing your reno too) - I think in an ideal world partners would be doing some of their own research to help make decisions, rather than only coming in after you've already done all the research to make the decision xx

I don't actually know re symptoms/lack thereof @biscuitcat. I don't feel any different than 4-5 weeks ago when I didn't have it and my fasting glucose levels are 7.5, whereas the maximum is 5.6. Again, don't know if that's high, it isn't to me lol! They'll tell me more next week. I really would not have known had it not been for the growth scan, so in a way I'm sad it's not fine, but glad I now can manage it. It will be better for the LO too so I'll deffo be cracking on with whatever is needed! xx

How have you all put on so little weight?! I gave up on the scales a long time ago but I know I've put on way more than a stone. I haven't been eating badly either. I guess starting a pregnancy with steroids and progesterone doesn't help though 🙈

@PurplePansy05 sorry to hear it came back positive. I hope it can just be managed with diet. Glad they checked it out for you.

My husband and I are both pretty stand off when it comes to the birth. I'm hoping for a CS, and if that doesn't happen then tbh I'm totally going to wing it. Probably not the best idea but I just can't think about it, so I'm not going to! DH knows I'm happy to have pain relief and that's about it really! I do realise I will probably regret the lack of planning when the time comes!

I think because I'm quite laid back about the actual labour I feel like my OH doesn't think he should worry either which is probably a good thing. We've discussed vague preferences etc but nothing more than that, I think he does feel like he'll be a bit useless at the birth but I just need his emotional support and love more than anything

@Daffodil21 I've gained about 11.5 kilos/25lbs, which seems to be normal based on some charts I've seen online. I don't feel like I've gained much anywhere besides my boobs and belly, I still look relatively pre-pregnancy shaped from behind! Not worrying about weight gain, just trying to stay healthy.

@WolfMother326 yep, beyond caring tbh! I've definitely gained weight on my legs and bum too but never mind

Just start playing this podcast randomly around the house, in the car, etc, whenever he can't escape :o

podcasts.google.com/feed/aHR0cHM6Ly9mZWVkcy5idXp6c3Byb3V0LmNvbS8xNDk1MjI4LnJzcw?sa=X&ved=2ahUKEwi_36nHu_vvAhUDQcAGHZdVBc0Q27cFegQIARAU

If you don't use google for podcasts you can just google the name "The Ultimate Guide To Being a Birth Partner podcast".

Bertie