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Birth clubs

Aug 2021 - 2nd Trimester continues

996 replies

Alittlexmasmagic · 06/03/2021 12:31

Hi everyone, another thread begins & things are getting real now 😄 x

OP posts:
PurplePansy05 · 06/03/2021 12:52

Hi! 😄🙌 Thank you for the new thread!

@HopefulB, I'm a collie mum too. No additional training as such but I am already desensitising him to baby noises. Some great videos on YT and on Dog's Trust fo this. He's doing well, bless him. He's a super gentle soul. We will definitely get baby stuff in few weeks early for him to sniff and as soon as baby arrives we will give him his blankets/muslin cloths to sniff straight away and they'll be his for comfort. I am sure he will be fine. The only thing we did is training him to minimise jumping when he gets very excited (eg doorbell, he's just so keen to tell us that he barks and jumps up and down, that's his "job" 🤣). So we are working on calming this enthusiasm down a bit, calm voices, calm commands and lots of rewards. Moving home helped a lot too as he's developing slightly different habits here which is perfect timing really xx

Champson · 06/03/2021 13:15

@HopefulB I’m going to the JR next Tuesday, 16 March. Yeah good shout on limiting walks. Or maybe walking slower?!?! Will try my best but finding it difficult!

We have a goldendoodle called Luna and my husband trained her extremely well since she was a pup - we walk her without a lead all the time as she won’t step off the curb. So no extra training needed here! The flip side is she’s a big chicken - she’s terrified of any dog who is bigger than half her size - it’s ridiculous but cute and funny 😆

biscuitcat · 06/03/2021 13:23

Thanks for the new thread!

@HopefulB we have a golden retriever, he's a big bouncy boy so we probably do need to do a bit of training! In particular, I'd love if we could get him to stop barking and getting excited when people come to the door, and jumping on them when they come in 😳 and hopefully train him to walk a bit better on the lead - he's amazing off lead, but pulls something dreadful, and he's so strong that we really do need to get better with training him... he's hardly on it as we can walk out of our door into the woods so we've not been very disciplined!

Daffodil21 · 06/03/2021 13:59

I take it back about the not being emotional thing - just went to the loo in the supermarket and there was a lady in front of me. She turned to me and said how I could go first as I must be bursting and then I almost had a cry in the cubicle 😂 I have no idea why! I also thought I just looked fat in this outfit but clearly I do actually look pregnant in it!!

@PurplePansy05 I gave one of those books a go and sent it back, it just wasn't my kind of thing either. I guess we just have to keep doing what we're doing and hoping for the best!

Thanks for the new thread Smile

HopefulB · 06/03/2021 14:08

Thanks for the tip re noises @PurplePansy05, I was wondering where I could find something to play. Ours Jumps when she sees the lead (hence current training to open door and her to sit on the driveway and wait for me, then clip her single handed at my side), and at the TV?! (Particularly Bond movies or anything underwater!!). I hadn’t really thought until I walked with a new mum, but once you have a baby carrier on front it’s quite difficult
to see the dog when she’s close!

Ha ha, @Champson, I’m there too on the 16th!!! But will be in Gynae investigation suite rather than maternity/OPD, as that’s where they do RMC scans. I like that they have set it up separately as it’s pretty horrific walking past a waiting room of pregnant ladies when you’ve just had bad news.

PurplePansy05 · 06/03/2021 15:15

@HopefulB No worries, noises can be tough for BCs, can't they. I was surprised to see how well my boy is coping so far though, it doesn't seem to bother him much.

Are you still under RMC care? Mine has switched to general obstetrics at my local hospital from 17 weeks xx

Daffodil21 · 06/03/2021 15:18

@PurplePansy05 @HopefulB did you get any extra care for this pregnancy from RMC? I was waiting for my referral when I got pregnant again

SpaaaaceGurl · 06/03/2021 15:18

Hey Everyone, i'm new to the birth club thread! Thought I would take the chance to jump on this fresh one :)
Hope you are all keeping well.

EDD 24th Aug and leaving the sex a surprise! This will be my rainbow baby.

BertieBotts · 06/03/2021 15:38

Thank you for the new thread!

WolfMother326 · 06/03/2021 15:57

Thank you for the new thread!

Welcome @SpaaaaceGurl and huge congratulations x

lucyrp · 06/03/2021 16:14

I wrote a massive reply on the old thread and then realised I needed to leave a message for the link to the next thread as there was only room for one more and I copied and pasted it and now it's all gone!
On the emotional front I am very emotional, when I was awake last night I spent the whole time crying and had to wake OH up at 4am to try and make me feel better as I was worried he wouldn't find me as attractive whilst pregnant etc and a whole load of other things I made myself over think 😫 I think it had been building up for a couple of days as had a funny couple of days where I thought I may have an anxiety attack but kept it at bay so think that was the release. I'm okay now though!

HopefulB · 06/03/2021 16:29

@PurplePansy05, yes, I think up to 20weeks, I need to check!

@Daffodil21, yes, once I had a positive test the consultant transferred me to a specialist nurse, she arranged a 6week scan (I had bleeding at 5weeks, so was very anxious), suggested another at 8weeks, and then has been lead by me how frequently I felt I needed the reassurance.

I’ve found the nurse really knowledgable and compassionate, and truly felt I could ask anything/contact them - I got further bleeding at 7weeks, but it was similar to last so managed to hold out to 8week scan. There she took care to show me the heartbeat, and then show me the blood, so explained everything very well. The approach was so different to the ultrasound at 12weeks. This is someone who knows what is going through your mind and does everything possible to support. Despite all of the reassurance and a heartbeat at 10weeks, I almost broke down at my 12 week scan as it was 30mins late, there was a lot of talk before the scan, and then the sonographer put the ultrasound on my bladder which looks like a big black hole- and anyone who has had a MMC will understand how I reacted. She quickly moved to baby at which point we saw the heartbeat and I did cry.

Now what was it people were saying about emotions.... I’m a little teary just writing about this! I wouldn’t wish a miscarriage on anyone, let alone recurrent, but all in all my care this time has been exactly what I would have wanted/needed, and for that I am extremely grateful.

Daffodil21 · 06/03/2021 16:42

@HopefulB I'm glad you've been given the extra care that you need. I was given one extra scan at 10 weeks and that was it. I asked if I was able to have another betweeen 12 and 20 weeks and she very sharply said 'no. You don't need one, everything looks fine' which I thought was very ignorant of her. She knew my history too. I've just ended up going private for scans when I need them. At my midwife appointment yesterday she asked if I'd heard from the consultant (I hadn't). She had put in a referral at my booking app but I never heard anything. I just feel so let down and left to it, but I'm just fortunate we've been able to book private scans. Will they keep up their care for you going forward?

@lucyrp I'm glad you're feeling better now. I'm sure your OH loves you exactly for who you are!

Champson · 06/03/2021 17:44

@HopefulB how crazy timing is that!! Would be fun to meet but I have no clue where you will be or where I will be for that matter as will be my first time there. My appointment is at 9am so if you’re around let me know :-)

And thanks for sharing your story - it must be so so hard for all you ladies with recurrent miscarriages. I’m anxious about mine and I’ve never had one before, can’t even imagine what you ladies are feeling xx On the bright side sounds like the JR has a great team!! Phew! @Daffodil21 can you switch hospitals like me if you don’t like your team?

Daffodil21 · 06/03/2021 18:06

@Champson there isn't really much of a choice up here! I'm in NE Scotland. Generally I like who I've dealt with, they're perfectly friendly enough (except the 'no you don't need one' woman) so when I've had appointments it's generally been ok, there just hasn't been much support considering our history. I can't believe you're having triplets!! How terrifyingly exciting!!!!

How funny two of you are at the same hospital on the same day!

MrsB2019x · 06/03/2021 18:20

Thanks for the new thread @Alittlexmasmagic ☺️

I didn’t think I was overly emotional but was driving earlier listening to music, and just started sobbing at the song! It’s got a line in it “and like the seed becomes the tree, we take the shape of a family” and that set me right off 😭

PurplePansy05 · 06/03/2021 19:16

@Daffodil21 I was tested at the RMC before this pregnancy (came back clear and DH was tested privately before, so no reason ever identified for us). They also tested the pregnancy tissue after my 3rd loss, it came back inconclusive so again no help really.

They scanned me at 6 and 9 weeks and prescribed progesterone from BFP till end of 1st trimester. I also had a couple of consultations with an RMC consultant and agreed baby aspirin till 36 weeks. Both purely as a precaaution. But I will say there has been no extra help in the second trimester, no extra scans offered. I am consultant led as they wanted to check my cervix and also DH has a congenital heart issue, this in combination with my prior history and the fact my mum is also a recurrent miscarrier and my brother was stillborn made me consultant led. But that's quite a baggage, I'm not even sure if I'd be consultant led "just" as an RMC patient which to me is crazy. As far as it stands I only have additional scans at 32 and 36 weeks and so a huge gap between 20 and 32 which I'll have to fill privately for reassurance Confused xx

Smurf123 · 06/03/2021 20:54

I'm consultant led this time but only because of ds birth and iugr. From 21 weeks I'm to get scans every 3 weeks then every 2 weeks from 32 weeks but as I say that's due to ds birth rather than the rmc..
I'm on 150mg aspirin and 5mg folic acid also but all the recurrent miscarriage tests supposedly came back clear.
@PurplePansy05 it does seem like a lot of us due in August with similar history but I'm hoping we all get our rainbow baby this time!

Jessicapebbles · 06/03/2021 23:43

Marking my place 💖

Hoares3 · 07/03/2021 07:48

Thanks for the new thread, just popping a message so I don't get lost 🥲

lucyrp · 07/03/2021 09:15

Anyone else feel that they're bump hasn't grown thag much in the last few weeks ? It seems to have been the same since about 14 weeks and I'm 17 tomorrow 🙁

Whatshouldbemyusername · 07/03/2021 09:22

Morning ladies.

@SpaaaaceGurl welcome and congratulations 🥳 x

@lucyrp Congratulations. I start 16 weeks today and I have a bloat/gas bump more than baby bump so I’m abit confused about it all. Plus I also have an anterior placenta so I don’t think I’m going to feel baby flutters and kicks till week 21 or so 😑x

notinthestarsigns · 07/03/2021 09:52

Interesting to see a few of you post about feelings of detachment. @PurplePansy05, I agree with you that I don’t think those feelings would make it any better if the worst was to happen, but it is also a natural reaction which is hard to get away from. I spoke with my consultant about it this week and he said it is pretty common. I just wish my heart melted when I see the baby on scans like it did with my previous pregnancy but it doesn’t in the same way. I think partly because at this stage of pregnancy he was looking great on scans, so it means they don’t give me any reassurance, and also given what we went through was so traumatic it’s hard not to feel sad about what happened with him when I see this baby on a scan. It does mean that you miss out on feeling excited, when others talk about Mother’s Day, last Mother’s Day I was pregnant and this year will be my first Mother’s Day since giving birth to my baby after his heart stopped beating, and I will be visiting his grave 😥 it will always be a day tinged with sadness for me but hopefully next year there will be some joy also.

Anyway, on a more positive note, I was in Tesco yesterday and bought my first purchase for this baby. It was just a little babygro, and I still won’t be making any big purchases for a while but it was a big thing for me to even buy that and I’m hoping the start of a bit of a change in mindset!

Daffodil21 · 07/03/2021 10:18

@PurplePansy05 wow that's a lot to deal with. I'm sorry about your mum's struggles and your brother. I'm also on progesterone but I had to go private to get it initially.

@notinthestarsigns that's awful, I'm so so sorry to hear you had a stillborn baby. I can't imagine having a loss at that stage, all my losses were early but that's what I'm terrified of. I had steroids and progesterone to hoprfullly get me into the second trimester, which it did. But now I'm off the steroids and will be off the progesterone soon too and I'm terrified of what could happen after. I'm actually the same as you in scans, even though my losses were early. I just stare blankly at the screen tbh because I know it doesn't necessarily mean a baby at the end. They always go into great detail and the private ones play the heartbeat so we can hear it but again I'm just blank and then relieved afterwards that he's still ok.
I'll be thinking of you on Mother's Day, that's such a tough thing to go through ❤️

I'm so glad you bought the baby grows yesterday though! We had a look in the supermarket yesterday too (something I never thought we would do!) and I have to say I was tempted to buy a couple of things. There were lots of cute things in there!!

Whatshouldbemyusername · 07/03/2021 10:54

@PurplePansy05 @Daffodil21 @notinthestarsigns big virtual hugs to you ladies. You’re all amazing and this is beautiful that is happening for yous. Your babies are going to be sooo loved 🥰. I am sorry you had to go through all this. It’s heartbreaking and my heart bleeds for you all. It’s all onwards and upwards now. X

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