'Due in the new year the next generation - who ate all the pies'

[Bettymamma]

I hope you all find this. I'll write a proper message once I see it works!xx

PMSL Bettymama ? all my dream lovers have been very hunky and no-one I know!

Beller ? don?t know which one it is but after what you have said, I?d go for your Dad?s, he?ll be so chuffed too, more so than any of the other name-sakes!

yes i think he would too...that one is Powling Mrsmcjnr....
Think im going to call XP at the wekend and get him round next week for a chat...there are other issues i need to sort out too..might make things clearer for me?

it's unusual too which is nice. Don't let XP upset you or make you do anything you don't want to.

RANT ALERT

Just went into the newsagent and there was another preg lady in there, as she entered one of her work colleagues was leaving and as she did she touched her bump..... makes me mad and it wasnt even my bump... wanted to punch her lights out.

Having a bad hormonal day me thinks.

talking about other pg woman - have you noticed there is some weird psychological competition going on when you see other pg woman who you don't know, about who is further along/has the biggest bump? We always eye each other up dubiously? I've never found other pg woman who you see in the street, on the train etc to actually be that friendly to me when I'm pg. Does that make sense?

What a weird bunch we all are.

Of course all you lot are lovely!

ps people DO NOT touch MY stomach

yeah definitely. i alwys stare and tryt o make eye contact and smile, but they clearly think i am nuts and ignore me. i suppose do you really want to get into the how far along are you etc with a stranger on the train.

incidentally both times i have seen millions of pregnant women and that has been an indicator to me that i am pregnant as most other times i never see any pregnant women.

I seem to see pregnant women all over the place at the moment! I work with about 300 men...and a few of them when they see me touch my bump and ask how i am?! Just ask how i am!! Not public property...

I just dont get it you ddont touch people randomly when they are not pregnant!!

I am the kind of person however, that has no interest in touching peoples bumps and even once they have the babies there are people who immediately pick them up when they go into a room, I never ever touch the baby until invited or at least ask if i can hold. This drove me completely round the bend when i had DS.

Can i be honest and say newborns actually scare me - including my own. They are so erratic! Does it need feeding, does it have wind, does it need to sleep, has it got colic, is it bored etc etc. Poor unborn child.

People should not be touching bumps unless invited - ESPECIALLY men. Unless John Precott of course - urgh gross!

another thing that annoys me whilst i am moaning....is other people telling me my baby is hungry when it starts crying. drives me nuts.

I'll be honest i am not good with visitors after just having a baby. With DS I wanted to deck everyone who walked through the door - some more than others. Not looking forward to it this time.

Mixedmama - definitely report what's happened, she might get taken on full time and think it's OK to "borrow" anything she can as no-one said anything last time. How obvious would it be if you told your boss? Can you get to talk to them without everyone seeing? If you are in an open office you could always ask for a quiet chat about maternity questions, then when you go into a side office tell boss what it's really about. The best way would be a quiet word, along the lines of "I'm not trying to cause trouble but was concerned and thought you ought to be aware - tell him/her what happened, and that temp says they will pay the other lady on Friday - then boss is aware, they can decide whether to take action now or to see if temp actually pays up.

Beller what a problem! Is Babybel's father going to be involved long-term do you think? If not, I would avoid having his name. As for ex-DH's name, it depends on your feelings - I personally cringe at the fact that DD1 has my ex's surname whenever I hear it, it particularly grates when teachers send notes home to Mrs-ExDHname. If you like natural father's name, and are happy with any thoughts of natural father, then that sounds like a good option. Oh, I'm going round in circles here - must get a Jaffa Cake. (munch, munch...)

Mixedmama ? belly touching - no one?s done it to me yet and they had better not try!! I?d never touch anyone?s baby without being invited either. I remember when my nephew was 3 weeks old and I?d barely been allowed to touch him and we were all out at a restaurant and the Chinese waitress just grabbed him from his buggy and started cooing over him ? sis was mortified! I have a feeling I am going to feel the way you do about visitors about my PIL sounds awful but I know I will ? especially if they put their fingers in its mouth (don?t know why but just think they will and am appalled!)

Bettymama ? other pg women - I?ve noticed that too. It?s odd, not sisterly at all. The only nice one was at the Clarins counter but she was trying to flog me stuff!

Beller odd that blokes are tummy touching hey maybe they just like touching you I imagine you as quite a glamour puss

Hello Housemum

Thank you for cheering me up, just been looking at my finances and want to cry

Housemum - pass us a jaffa cake

Misedmama - i was the same. Everytime dd cried - 'oh shes hungry, she musn't have got enough last time'. 'No, I fed her an hour ago, she just doesn't like you holding her and pulling stupid faces at her.' ggrrrr.

I think we'll be more confident this time so we can ignore the 'helpful' suggestions.

Oh mrsmcjnr dont get me started on the PILs especially since i am clearly in a mood today. on such bad terms now since having DS that hopefully they wont show their faces.

in fact DH has only last week told them I am even pregnant and 20 weeks on Monday.

MrsMcJnr - don't look at your finances - from now on you will be in skintsville. People will put fingers in your baby's mouth especially old female relatives. Your tongue will be covered in ulcers from biting it!

My legs are swollen and I've put them on the desk. HR lady says I need to stop wearing such 'fashionable' shoes. She has a point. The heels need to be consigned to the back of the wardrobe for a bit.

oh tell more mixedmama

(apologies for spelling ur name wrong earlier!?)

don?t say that Mixedmama ? I am trying so hard not to think negative thoughts about them but I can?t help it. I?ve already told DH that I don?t want them coming to the hospital the first day and he says he won?t be able to keep them away. I am being so unfair, DH and SIL turned out ok but my FIL (30 odd years on) has some really disgusting habits and I just worry!! They are also driving me mad about all being at their place for Christmas ? I don?t want to ANYWHERE especially not 1hr 40 from the hospital at that stage! Unfortunately, this baby will be a big deal in DH?s family, 1st one for 16 years!

oh Bettymama i may not stop.

Ok you aksed.... you maywant to skip this post... it will be long and rant filled.

They are just nasty to me. MIL completely ignores me, i mean if I say something to her directly turns her back and walks away. all because i have my own ideas about how i want to bring up DS. Examples:

• I insisted on preparing his "fresh food" whilst weaning, did not want any jar food. IGNORED and DS given jar food.

• Wanted DS to drink water and Milk and not have juice until he is exposed to it at nursery / school / parties etc. IGNORED DS given juice all of the time, no matter how many times we go through it.

• Provided travel cot for daytime naps. Arrive to find DS asleep on high divan bed in dark with door closed. he was about 7-8 months so had mastered turning over etc. When questioned told that he has a cushion next to him so wont fall off.

• Told them that we would not be shaving his hair for a second time. IGNORED went for an interview and DS sent homme with bald head - never cried so much in my whole life.

• FIL insisted on weaning by giving a banana at 3 months. Said no. IGNORED DS given banana.

• MIL phoning various family members and asking them to speak to DH about the way i dress when NOT in their company.

• MIL asking if my mum took drugs (as my mum is English)

• Told not to put DS on side but on back. IGNORED DS put on side (from 4 days old) with cushion under head and one either side so he will not roll onto back.

Justification for above... she has had kids.

Outcome - thoughts of divorce every single day, crying every single night until DH (who during this time was not so dear/darling) agreed to move closer to my parents so they could take over day to day childcare, came to the agreement that i do not go there as they have said i am no longer welcome. If i walk into a room they pick DS up and take him to another room.

I make a point of sending DS there one day a week altho at the moment he is there everyday as my parents are on holiday and it kills me everyday. Obviously everyday eating wotsits, drinking juice and lots of sweet crap. No problem with things as a treat, but have a problem with being ignored.

MrsMcJnr - My SIL came to the hosp day after DS was born and stayed 4 hours and would not even go for a walk when I said i needed to feed him.

Popped away from the bed for five minutes when i cam back DS who had not really cried since he was born was screaming cos thet were changing my new born babies nappy. Went mental.

Thankfully the hosp i am at this time has a strict only 2 people at a time policy and no children other than my own. they wont come anyway, last time the hospital was oppostie their house annd i had to insist on DH going to pick them up.

Mixedmama - reading about your in-laws has got me feeling very angry. How awful for you. Perhaps you dh could have a word with them? I hope my MIL will not behave like that. I don't think she will as I do get on well with her. But it must be hard for them not to interfere as they must think they are experts and we are just learners.

MrsMcJnr no im in ipswich were not 100 % sure which names we like were going to deside when we know what sex baby is

who ever had that dream about john prescott - yuck!!!!!!

Mixedmama - sorry to her about your relationship with your in-laws. I recall you saying your hubby family are from Bangledesh (or have I got it completely wrong??) They are probably doing what they think it 'right' in their culture, but has your hubby told them that you are not happy about what they are doing? Maybe if they hear it from him they might be willing to change

Morning ladies!

Mrsmcjnr - You are obviously standing your ground re xmas?! I will be at my sisters, and BIL is on duty to whizz me back home if i go into labour (40 min journey). Thanks for the glamour puss comment! thats the beauty of the net x

Mixedmama - I am soooooooo shocked at your in-laws!! thats appaling! Maybe im lucky not to have any?!

Housemum - NOt sure whether XP is going to involved at the moment, going to try and fix up a meeting with him next week. He has a daughter who is 12 and see's her on a regular type basis, they dont have any specific times sorted..probably once every 4-6 weeks...but they did live together when she was born....I was introduced to him by my best mates boyfriend, and he reckons he will want to be involved in some way...not showing any signs at the moment though!

Bettymama- Me and XH are really good friends, we work in the same office now, so see each other every day and he has been fab with all this. So that wouldnt be a problem with the name thing x

I am off to Cowes after work today sailing!!! A guy in our office owns a yacht and rents it out to the firm for cowes week and we can take clients. Just so happens one of my best mates works here too,and we are both sailing on the same day! So travel down tonight..and sail tomorrow! cool!

Hope everyone is ok xxxxxxxx