Feb 2019 babies thread 7! Growing bumps and gender reveals!

[maxiflump1]

Thread 7 ladies......!!

@Since2016 - sorry you are having a shitty day :( on the plus side - it IS Friday. Plus Strictly is back if you like that sort of thing :)

My bump has started to become public knowledge and a conversation point at 18 weeks. Think it’s a bit awkward as I’ve always had a tummy and I’m not slim (short (not petite!) size 12/14) so some people aren’t sure and one person at my counselling placement was clearly relieved someone else asked!

Some days I’m OK and can do the small talk well but because I’m not a super happy/excitable person I find it hard when that’s someone’s reaction and they expect the same back. I'm pretty private and measured and I’m also nervous about becoming a parent so although I’m happy to be pregnant I’m also pretty awkward with the conversations! My get out has been “it happened sooner than we expected!” which is 100% true, but I say it to sort of “explain” my less than giddy reaction. I’m just not that kind of person. It’s overwhelming when life is about to turn upside down, no matter if it was my choice and my plan! Because having children has never been a definite part of my “plan” and I’ve not had family with kids nearby none of it feels natural or easy at the moment, I’m just hoping it is healthy and that I can cope with whatever it throws at me/up on me but it feels like people don’t want to hear all that!

Not sure why I’m rambling on!

I’m jealous of those of you that can think of boys names, we’ve got one maybe but husband doesn’t like any of the others I like. We have more girls names for sure. I feel like I need to see them in the flesh and look them in the eye and sense their personality before I know... in a slightly new age way I’m hoping they tell me their name.

Re cribs: has anyone got a knuma? It seems a lot like a snuzpod and they seem to go quite cheap on eBay.

Powkin, this is our fourth and I feel like that! Not helped by everyone asking if it was planned (which it actually wasn't) one of the mums asked and I kind of just said yes and laughed it off but afterwards thought really it's quite rude and wish I had a better comeback and thought of all the things I wish I had of said! If it was our first or second I bet people wouldn't ask the same thing! Also getting annoyed the fact I feel so rubbish still - I have a few friends pregnant and they just seem to be breezing through pregnancy and I've spend most of my time with my head down the toilet and look dreadful! I am really suffering with anxiety too atm and it's making me feel really horrible everytime I go out!

I was meant to be going to London to have dinner and see lion king tonight with DH and some friends and Eldest DS has taken my place, I think DH is a bit upset I didn't go but anxiety mixed with sickness and a rotten cold I just feel like I would spend the whole time wishing I was at home and ruin it for everyone else! Really gutted tbh and perhaps I should have forced myself to go but the idea of being sick on the train and not being able to just jump in the car and get home worries me! Silly I know but I've got myself so worked up over it I even cried!

Alice - difference between a snuzpod 2 3 in 1 and a snuzpod 3 is the new 3 is more lightweight, slightly bigger crib and also has a anti reflux bit so you can tilt it up! We have seen both and the 3 would be much more manageable to carry downstairs etc! Plus we like the white with grey colours and there isn't much price difference New between the 2 and 3!

I also think we have a name! We were going to have Louis for a boy - I find girls names much harder and of course we are having a girl!

Our little girl keeps saying the name Ava and it's really grown on me and I think it would go nicely with the others Childrens names possibly
Outing but - we have a Theodore (Theo), Oliver (Ollie) and Elsa. Just need to think of a middle name, DH likes louise but I'm not sure as the kids all have quite traditional middle names Freddie, Henry and Rose and I'm not sure Louise goes although the syllables do so any suggestions welcome!!

Our boys name was Jack but torn with girls. Quite like Emma or Sophie. It's so difficult x

@sickmumma Thanks! I’ll have to have a good look. I think you’re right that they’re the same price...

This is my third boy and I have no names 😩

My second son didn’t have a name for several days when he was born, and this time it’s even harder.

Made worse by my ‘criteria’, I really want English names (I’m going to have to fold on that I think!), I don’t like the normal names though, like Alfie, Edward, Jack, etc. I don’t want anything too common but I don’t want anything too weird. I really don’t want a biblical name. It kind of rules everything out! 😂

I thought I’d given my first two sons quite solid individual names, then as soon as I’d named them I started hearing of loads of other kids with their names!

There’s loads of girls names I like though 😂

@Powkin I'm the same way. I've never been one to enthuse (it's kind of a joke amongst our friends) and even though we've been trying for eight years I'm still not overly emotional/excitable. People just gave to deal with my lack of visible enthusiasm cos that's just the way I am and I ain't sorry. I think DH finds it a bit hard when he's getting all soft over the scan or patting my bump and I'm just like 'yup that's a baby' but he's used to me.

I find that im getting really upset and defensive also when people ask if it was planned. If only they knew the years of heart break ive had to get to this little miracle. Soon makes people feel awkward when I start telling them ins and outs of my gynological history and why it wasnt planned. They just really wanted to be here 😂

I also got really upset today when the dr called me skinny and said im going to be one of those people who never looks pregnant. I am unsure why it upset me. Id felt I was sporting quite a bump before she said that.

Im mental health wise probally feeling the most anixity free ive felt for ages. But still finding myself super sensitive to comments.

I’m a teacher and struggled at first due to knowing too many kids with the most popular names, but I am now totally decided on my little boy’s name. I’m only telling family though just incase I change my mind. This is also partly because it’s an uncommon name (though also very traditional) so I think people will turn up their nose a little. I think/hope people are less likely to question it once he’s born.

I’m also quite enjoying the zaney name suggestions from my friends, one suggested Xabat. I just smiled politely whilst thinking ‘never!’

Any of you had wacky name suggestions from people?

@Notquiteagandt - I've been asked that loads, even my dad (we're not close but still '. I've also had a few 'happy?'. Really, I can't believe someone would seriously ask a person that?? It's nobodies business either way, I think it's really rude xx

@baby160p we already knew from a harmony test but the scan confirmed it.

@Celebelly congrats, glad all went well.

@Yakadee we knew she was a girl before we started thinking too much about names and she is our first so no names are used up yet. Amazingly DH and I have pretty much got her name sorted first and middle but we have some other contenders incase it doe seem to suit when we meet her.

Unrelated, tesco sell cans of premixed very low alcohol "gin" and tonic, less than 0.05% and quite tasty, good if you really fancy a drink but are trying to avoid it.

Argh I think our bed measures about 65 or 66cm and the snuzpod says max 63cm height. I wonder if that small a difference would matter? Probably still get it anyway to use as a non-co-sleeping crib!

@surprisedmom that’s the kind of name I want! Traditional but not common.. I can’t find any I like 😩

I’ve asked my kids to help, my son has suggested ‘Ravinger’... it’s english and means ‘from the ravine’ or similar. He loves it, I’m not convinced 😂

Thanks ladies I didn't realise there was a height limit on snuzpods just sent DH to measure the bed! The 3rd version goes to 61cm whilst version 2 is 58 cm our bed is 60cm. We had been looking at 2nd hand frames ones but they are all version 2s. Will be one for thee Jan sales!

Oops max 63cm sorry!

@NotAsGreenAsCabbageLooking haha Ravinger would definitely be unique. Perhaps letting children choose names isn’t the best route.
That being said I have a friend whose parents let her 4 year old brother choose her name and he chose Romina, which turned out to be nice but could have gone disasterously wrong.

My gran yesterday was talking about Shula on The Archers, I said it sounded like it should be Sheila. She said that the storyline at the time was that they just threw down scrabble pieces to name her!

I don’t know if I’m being over sensitive but my mum (who hasn’t seen me in 3/4 weeks) keeps making comments, like when I wasn’t sure I was showing she was like “no I think that’s just cake” and then today I sent her a picture of an apple cake I just made and it’s “make sure you don’t eat all of it”. I think it’s all meant to be lighthearted but feels really shitty. She was a size 6 when she had my sister and probably a 10 at most with me. She’s always been really fixated on looks so I hate it when she makes comments about my weight or shape. I certainly wanted to lose more weight before I got pregnant but now there’s not much I can do other than try and eat sensibly (which I do) and exercise (which I also try to do). I’ve always hated my stomach and was finally starting to feel a little better about people staring at it and trying to be a bit more confident. I dread passing on my parents body shaming so trying to be kind to myself.

Aw powkin I know how you feel. My mum is nowhere near as bad but she has always been a bit funny about weight and in my first pregnancy made a couple of comments which really upset me and I ended up putting her straight. I think she was actually a bit mortified and hadn't realised how bad she'd sounded as after that she never said anything other than that I looked good. Could it be worth putting your mum straight?

She's been a bit like it this time round, not as bad but the odd general comment about how it's much easier not to put on too much so you don't have much to lose. Easier said than done when all you can eat is junk in the first trimester!

@Lookingforadvice123 - that sounds shit, and also terrible advice medically! And yeah, I’m still eating monster munch!

I literally had a go at my dad a few days ago for sending a mass email out to his cousin and 3 cousins (who I haven’t seen in years) documenting the fact that I was pregnant and had a CVS and all the super private details of my pregnancy as if it was nothing, so now I feel like if I start telling my mum to reign her neck in too then I’ll definitely be the terrible oversensitive daughter... my dad did apologise but only after sulking at me. My parents have NO boundaries. I’ve had so much therapy that DH and I are considering setting up a uni/therapy fund for our kids just in case we mess them up as much as my parents did!

Does anyone get like sore ribs if sitting down in a uncomfy position for too long??

@powkin can you reply by saying in a lighthearted way which gets the message through to her?

I came back from holiday this week had a colleague (female) say wow I didn't expect you to get that big in 2 weeks.... So I replied with yep I'm a whale Iceland will start hunting me soon..... She went red apologised for how it sounded and said that she didn't realise how much her mums complexes had rubbed off on her (apparently commented a lot when she was pregnant)

Had my anomaly scan yesterday and so relieved that everything with both babies is fine. I was so nervous about the scan I burst into tears the moment I walked into the room but the sonographer was totally lovely and gave me tissues and asked me how I wanted the scan to go. I'd forgotten how amazing the scans are and what you see. Anyway we decided to find out what we're having and it's A GIRL AND A BOY!! So excited that my DD and DS will each have a brother and a sister 😍😍

@Mrsy87 That's so exciting. Congratulations. And easier on names than if it were 2 the same?!

powkin that's understandable but so wrong of your dad! Agree with maybe the lighthearted comment like twiglet said?

twiglet one of my more insensitive colleagues said to me when I was heavily pregnant with DS, "you can tell you're having a boy because you're carrying all over". So I said "oh thanks xxx, so you're telling me I've put weight on all over, not just my bump?". She was a bit embarrassed I think like your colleague, but I don't suppose it'll stop her this time round! Some people just have no filter

And MrsY87 that's lovely news congratulations!!!!! So glad all was well too.

@powkin - I totally get where you're coming from. I wouldn't want everyone knowing my business either

@MrsY87 - congratulations, glad they're both OK, a boy and girl too - lovely!!! X