Due in Sept '07 - part 5 - '.... Half Way to Heaven......?'

[Hopeitwontbebig]

Hope you all don't mind about the new thread. We've been AGONISING over the name

Pennypops, so sorry to hear about your trauma this week, it must have been terrifying for you. I hope they have finally got to the bottom of the reasons for your bleeding. I had a slight bleed on Tuesday. Someone else started this thread, which I have posted on, it may explain things about cervical erosions. x x x

well my lovelys im leaving work now :-) whohooo!! hope u all have a lovely weekend!! take it easy and eat lots .!!! x

Penny - glad to hear that they let you out of hospital, I hope the rest of your pregnancy is a bit less stressful for you!

Looby - obviously someone should call social services if you are wearing high heels during pregnancy How dare you! Seriously, people really do think they have a right to say whatever they want when you are pregnant don't they? - like my MIL telling my BIL not to pour me any wine after he asked me if I wanted some. She didn't even give me a chance to answer!

Well I had my first bump grope today. Walked into my hairdresser's and she said "Aaaaah" and patted my bump - I didn't really mind, just thought it was really funny. I could never imagine doing that to someone else....

My birth ball was delivered today, unfortunately I haven't got a chance to try it out yet as my boys spent most of the day rolling it around the house and trying to squish each other underneath it .

mrsmar - I love the name Luca. Enzo is nice too but I think you need to use some pregnant woman guilt along the lines of "well I have carried this baby for 9 long months so shouldn't I at least get to choose the name (flutter eyelashes with tears in eyes)"

hello,

I've had a f*ing nightmare of a week. Sorry if anyone is offended by my language. To sum up briefly......

Ended up in hospital with bleeding and had to stay in. Low lying placenta bleeding and causing problems. Boyfriend was miles away at the races and couldn't get back. Didn't really want to worry anyone else so was on my own. Now considered 'high risk' - unless placenta moves - which I'm hoping and hoping it will. Have to have lots of rest which is driving me crazy. Mum had a fall out with me because I didn't ring her immediatly.

So I'm not great and worrying about where things can go from here.

MrsMar - I do really really love the name Luca. It was on my list of names and although DP liked it, he thought we would have to be Italian for it to work.

My number 1 name - which I know won't be very popular - is Dougie (Douglas for his Sunday name). Whenever I tell anyone they either laugh or pull a disgusted face. But I don't care what other people think. My partner is Scottish and it was also my grandad's name so it's like a combination of our 2 families. It actually started as a joke, but just stuck!

ChattyHan - not sure if I've missed any updates, but I really hope you sort things out with your partner. It's not really what you need right now. Think of your health and of your baby and try not to get too stressed. Everything will work out in the end. Much love.

Enough ramblings. I'm layed on the settee with one eye on the FA cup. DP won't even let me peg the washing out. I'm going crazy!!

emalushka - last pregnancy i had low lying placenta which caused bleeding at 26wks. I didn't have any more problems after that and the placenta moved at around 32wks. This time the placenta has moved already! Why don't you take up knitting to pass the time! LOL - thinking of you xx

thanks for your concern - DP and I are talking which is good - but i honestly don't know whether he wants to try and make it work - last night was great - we chatted, joked and laughed and he delayed going out for a couple of hours to spend time with me - but now he seems distant again - we have discussed how things may work if he goes - i'm obviously very concerned about the children, money and support. He says he wouldn't desert me and would support me as the mother of his kids as much as possible. We are discussing a trial separation of about a week so he can have the space he needs and i can see how i cope - until he makes a decision to go or stay i feel like i'm in limbo!

Make sure you stand up for yourself and don't let him be in control. Give him a time limit and if he hasn't made up his mind by then, ask him to leave anyway. You don't deserve to be treated like this and he is showing a lack of respect for your feelings and health.

It is easier said than done, but be strong about the situation otherwise he will continue to piss around.

If the worse comes to the worst and you do end up being a single mum, I'm sure you will be fine. financially, you may not be wealthy, but you will manage and perhaps there will be advantages to it that you can't see now. Good luck x

Emalushka- what a nightmare you've had, such a worry. My god, it was a real week for it last week.

Canadianmum - your twins sound adorable!

Chattyhan - what a dreadful time you're facing, like emalushka says, make sure you do stand up for yourself. You seem amazingly calm and patient. I hope your DP realises just what a lucky man he is to have you and comes to his senses soon.

Hi can i join?
Im Sophie im pg with bubba #3 and due on 16th September. We have 2 dd's Olivia-Mae is 5 and Elana-Rose is 2 and this is another girl so she will be called Maisy-Rae. We live in Norfolk.

Good morning all hope everyone had a good weekend!

Update on heels situation - i'v bought 3 pairs of wedges instead still high to give me length and to feel normal but that old bag cant tell me of for wearing a heel.! :-) Got Midwife thurs find out if my Bp has gone down eeekk!!

Hello Sophie and welcome! Of course you can join...

I need some reassurance today, so calling all ladies on this thread who are already mothers. I was doing a bit of reading over the weekend on labour, after labour, newborns etc and I suddenly felt overwhelmed by just how difficult, hard and tiring it is all going to be. I mean, I knew it was not going to be a walk in the park having a baby but how on earth do you cope, recovering from the birth and looking after a tiny new scary thing?
I think I just need someone to tell me that it's all worth it...!!!

Hi Holly! I remember being very, very happy in the first weeks after DD was born. Yes, no sleep, but as long as there's someone supportive with you (DP, relative, etc.) in the first week, you'll quickly get the hang of it! Breastfeeding in the early stages requires a lot of support physically - you are literally tied to your home, and often to a chair or the bed, so you need to brief someone to help you by making sure you've got water, etc., to hand. I walked from the house to the garage and drove back when DD was about 5 days old - no problem at all. Don't worry too much about in advance about the 'baby blues' - I got them for about a day when the milk came in because it hurt and I was knackered, but (again) with good support, it passed quickly.

I meant the MOT garage 10 minutes' walk away!!!!

I agree with toadstool. I remember bringing ds back from the hospital, we put him down in the middle of the room in his car seat, looked at each other and said... 'what do we do now?' It is amazing how naturally it does come to you though. I was extremely tired and sore, I had a forceps delivery and full episiotomy so was extra sore, but seeing as I spent most of the time stuck on the sofa it wasn't too bad.

You do need some support though, I couldn't have coped without DH fetching and carrying for me and making me all my meals, so I hope you have a good support network available to you.

I am dreading it this time round, no way I am going to be able to sit on the sofa for a week with a 2 year old running around

Main thing is don't worry, things will work out, they always do and you will always cope.

That's so reassuring. I do have a lovely DH and a sister who lives with us (don't ask!) and I am going to get my cleaning lady to come twice a week so hopefully this will all be OK...! Thanks so much for replying. I think I'd just forgotten what this is all for...!

Welcome on board Sophie!!

Holly, don't worry too much, I know it's easier said than done. I just remember being SO tired, I think that's the worst bit, but like others have said, as long as you get support you get over it quite quickly. A tip would be to make lots of meals and freeze them, so that your DH can just pop them in the oven. It is a bit overwhelming to begin with, me and DH had a 'what do we do now' moment too when we brought DS1 home! You soon get into the swing of things. Also, stitches and post labour pains never seem all that bad strangely enough!

Well I've had another morning at hospital. The slight spotting started again this morning, no reason for it this time I might add! No BDing involved!! I decided to drive over to Oxford to see if they'd do any more tests than Banbury did last week. Well after lots of poking and prodding and a scan they seem quite happy that the spotting isn't coming from the baby or placenta, but from my cervix. Looks like this is just something I am going to have to put up with. It's so frightening having any spotting, however slight, I HATE IT HATE IT HATE IT. Feeling v sorry for myself at the moment. I don't like this stress. It also looks like I am definately developing SPD, so need to get some physio asap. Anyway, on a good note, the lady who scanned me was a senior sonographer no less, and she's confirmed that my bubba is still a little girl

Hello all! Haven't had a chance to catch up at all - have stolen a few minutes out of my lunchbreak to pop in! (was lazy and have copied and pasted this post onto another thread too )

We've got no internet at home so I've missed you all like crazy, hope all is well?

I went to the consultants last week - what a palarva (sp?)!! They couldn't find the heartbeat so ended up having a quick scan to check all is well and they double checked that we're having a girl. Wish I'd taken somebody with me as it was a little scary to be honest! Also, I've got low blood pressure which would explain why I've been feeling sick lately and very very tired and out of breath all the time. Trying to take things slowly as can't afford any more time off work.

Will catch up properly as soon as our internet is back again which will hopefully be later this week (grrrr to the phone company by the way!).

Take care, PLP 22+2 xoxoxo

Hi Everyone... I hope you all had a good weekend. I went to Jersey for a party, had a lovely time. I'm knackered now though... I forgot to take my spatone with me so I haven't taken it for two days. I don't know if an iron defficiency can make itself felt in such a short time, but I feel like I did before I started taking it, exhausted, unable to get off the sofa and breathless. So I've taken my dose this morning, had a big glass of orange juice an orange, and now I'm working my way through a bar of green and blacks mint.... all good for iron absorption!! hehehehehe

Welcome sophie... can't believe we're still growing!

Holly - I totally get your fears, I'm totally the same. I've looked after my nieces loads, but the idea of a new born 24/7 does terrify me. Someone said to me this weekend that the most important thing to remember is to listen to your instincts, listen to all the advice you get and smile sweetly then do what feels right, it usually is! I'm sure you'll be fine.. I'm sure we all will be, doesn't make any less daunting though! One great tip I did get this weekend (among the flood of "great" advice) was just before you're about to sit down to feed the baby, make sure you have stuff you can reach to occupy you, she said she always had a cup of tea/milk/water/whatever a packet of biscuits/dried fruit/healthy wotnots and the tv remote control/newspaper/magazine/book within reach before you sit down, the baby may cry for another couple of mins while you do this, but you can be there for an hour sometimes, so get prepared. Sounded eminently sensible to me (I usually do that just before I flop on the sofa anyway, as I'm usually far too lazy to get up again!!)

Chatty - sorry to hear your dp is being a bit pushmepullyou. It's good you're talking, I hope it all continues in a positive way.

Emalushka - God, sounds like you've had a terrible time of it. It is frustrating when complete rest is enforced on you, bizarrely I always dream of being told I have to take it easy for a few weeks, but I know it would drive me up the wall if I had to do it. Get some good books in and get your feet up!!! BTW I love the name Dougie.... it's really cute, esp if you have the scottish connection! Both dh and I are from Italian families and we have Italian surnames (I'm double barrelling mine with his so I can crowbar my surname into my baby's!!! hehehe) so we're going for an Italian theme with names. It's really nice to reflect your heritage, would you pronounce it Duggie or Dooogie???

Canadianmum - I hope you've managed to prize your birthball from the boys! It's very sweet they think it's a toy, perhaps when they're older you can remind them of that hehehehe!

I hope everyone else is well, as it's such a horrible rainy day down here I'm going to settle back on the sofa with the rest of this bar of green and blacks... back to work tomorrow! boo!!!

xx

Hi everyone

Just popping in - 23+4 weeks today!

Sorry to hear about pregnancy worries, anything to keep us from feeling complacent, I guess.

Holly29, to reassure you, Millie (now 17months) didn't actually sleep at night (in fact screamed with colic) for the few weeks. She started off doing it all night, then up until 0400 at about 5 weeks, then 0100 until about 10 weeks, then suddenly was fine, going down at 7pm and only waking for feeds at 12 weeks.

The bit that is reassuring, is that I was an exhausted first time mum, but despite this, it all seemed OK, and I was just so in love with her that I somehow floated through it.

It WAS hard, and looking back I don't know how I managed, but you just do.

I think that if you can prepare yourself to sometimes (often!) still be in your nightwear at midday, and you don't know where the time has gone, you will be fine. It just seems to suddenly come together. Also, I just worked my way down the possibilities for why she was crying, and that way you feel confident that if they are STILL crying, they must just need a cuddle.

Crikey lou... I'm still in my pyjamas at midday on my days off and I haven't got a baby yet!!! There's no hope for me, I might as well throw all my clothes away!

Hi All
Yes, great question Holly - I'm first time too and the thought of a new baby slightly terrifies me. So thanks to Mrs Fish, toadstool and Lou re your experience - most reassuring.

Yes, my stepdaughter was playing with the birthing ball all weekend - I didn't get a look in. But at least it justified the amount of space it takes up (i.e a lot).

Chatty - sorry things are still tricky, loads of luck with that.

I'm completely knackered this morning (where, oh where has my energy gone?) but counting the days til Scan (thurs) and a week's holiday (friday).

welcome sophie - what a lot of babies there will be in sept!

Holly29 - i agree with what the others have said it is hard but you'll manage - just don't expect too much of yourself in the early weeks and you might suprise yourself! It's also important to realise that every birth experience and baby is different so theres no way of knowing how you'll feel. Some babies sleep - some don't! My DS didn't sleep for more than 3 hrs without a feed until he was 1. It was really tough and i was exhausted but i managed it. It all gets forgotten very quickly - otherwise we wouldn't be doing it again!!!

Unfortunately i'm still in limbo as far as DP is concerned sometimes he seems like he's making an effort - last night we went out for a drink, sent the babysitter home, went to bed! then he got dressed and went to the pub at 10.45. When he makes an effort it gives me hope but most of the time it's like he can't stand to be in the same room. He's still talking about leaving and we're discussing what will happen if he does so right now thats what i'm planning for! I can't believe i'm going to have to do it on my own - i don't know how i'll cope with a baby and a toddler and no DP for support - i never saw my life like this!

Hi everyone,

HIWBB - thank you so much for pointing me at the thread on cervical erosions - it is reassuring. But I'm also sorry that its happenning to you as well - I wouldn't wish that on anyone. I'm sure it'll all be fine for both of us but I also know I'll experience the same heart stopping fear if it happens again just as I'm sure you will too. Lets stay in touch and help to reassure eachother! xx

Emalushka - so sorry to hear you have also had grief. This low placenta issue is a real worry I know but from what I can figure out they do mostly seem to shift of their own accord. So, make the most of the rest and make sure your fella treats with the care and attention you deserve!

Holly - if it makes you feel any better you aren't alone on the "oh f**k how do I look after a baby?" sort of worries. I get it all the time but just sort of assume I'll cope somehow. I've had a taste of the sleep deprivation when I was in hospital last week (only one night with a newborn munchkin in the bed next to me) and I felt rotten the next day. Doesn't bode well but I'm sure we'll get used to it! Without wanting to make everyone feel ill I'm sure the love you have for your baby will somehow see you through. That and lots of prozac. Just kidding.
I have already mentally adjusted to the fact that the house will be messier and that I'm not just going to be able to carry on as normal or even get dressed some days but I can live with that. Being naturally lazy helps I think!!

Chatty - I hope you're feeling better about yourself today. Have posted on your other thread and you are very much in my thoughts. Big hugs.

Sophie - Welcome!

Hi all the only thing that has woried me about having a new baby is that im a bit nervous that i shall have to get up @ 6am just to get everything ready for school and i hate getting up @7.30 now! We tried Elana-Rose @ playschool but she wasn,t impressed so we have decided to either try again in september or wait till she is 3. As long as i can get back into a routine im fairly confident but then dp isnt taking any paternity leave so i shall have to get used to it!

Pennypops - thank you for your kind words, I think it's a good idea if we can support each other, we both know what it's like to go through this. Don't you feel that no matter how much reassurance you get you still feel scared sh*tless. . Feeling depressed right now.

Hi Sophie,

How long did you try playschool for? I found it's taken q good 3/4 weeks for ds to get used to it and we go to playgroups too. They all allow newborns and from what I've seen the other mums will be queueing to cuddle lo, so that'll give me some time to play with ds. How come dp isn't taking leave?(sorry to be nosey) maybe a dd could be taken on morning school run by a friend's mum for a couple of weeks.xx