@Intelinside If I were you I'd pick my battles - can totally understand why you'd be cross at DH expressing a slight preference as I personally wouldn't have done that before confirmation of sex. But that said quite a few of my friends have told me about slight preferences before finding out, I think it's something quite a few people feel comfortable expressing to close friends (the two friends I know who announced far and wide that they absolutely did not want babies of one sex before finding out are a different story! I hope it goes without saying that both ended up with a child of the "unwanted" sex (which was different in both cases)). Principally, what's done is done, whereas he can actually fix other things he is doing wrong!
We have nothing at all researched or organised for baby yet, I won't feel comfortable doing it until after 20 week scan. And there should be plenty of time after that, I hope... That said, your DH may also not realise quite how much stuff you need to get for a baby. My DH was floored by a list his friend sent him, this might galvanise yours into action?
I would definitely take issue on the pregnancy book though. My DH is also big into research generally and researched and bought a book (Pregnancy for Men: the whole 9 months) which took his understanding and thus empathy up a level. It's a light read but also, importantly (and surprisingly unusually) it's very pro-women rather than peddling the tired narrative of the poor put-upon man whose hormonal pregnant partner is making his life a misery (!).
I would say to your DH that NCT comes pretty late on in pregnancy, and it helps prepare for birth/breastfeeding etc, it doesn't hold your hand through the pregnancy itself. That as you are doing the heavy lifting, it would be nice to feel like he had some idea of the process so he could support you through it and you don't feel alone. It's not really a lot to ask!