July 2016 Babies

[LaytexSales]

I don't think there is a thread for the July moms yet!
I'm due on July 2nd, just 4.5wks at the mo, but feel like I've known for ages as got a positive 5 days early on an early response! No real symptoms so far just a bit of cramping and some instant extra weight.
This is dc3 for us. Haven't made any appointments yet. Looking forward to the next 8 months!

I am loving meat at the moment. Have cravings for bacon which isn't the healthiest. Bacon sandwiches, BLTs. Yum! Have managed to stay away from it most of week. Have bought posh bacon from Tesco for tomorrow. Can't wait! Lol.

I'm vegetarian and have zero desire to eat meat, thankfully. I'm just really hungry, and wanting lots of green veg alongside carbs. Also still wanting chocolate. I must try and get to grips with it soon or I'll be piling on the weight. Seeing as I'm already too fat, I really could do without that!

Are any of the other first timers finding it hard going with their DH around the pregnancy? Mine was the one who suggested trying for a baby in the first place, but then seemed unexcited by my BFP. I eventually (days later) said I was a bit upset by this, and he said he was just being practical because it might not work out, and that he was of course excited. Since then he has made more effort to seem interested, although still says the odd thing that makes me think he doesn't really believe it is happening.

However, to cut a long story short, he does a lot more DIY work on our house renovation than I do, and he gets grumpy about that a lot. He understands that I won't be painting till I'm out of the first trimester, but he got hacked off tonight because I refused to help him shift some heavy stuff in case I did damage to our little embryo. I went and looked it up on the NHS website and it said that lifting and straining in early pregnancy is not linked to miscarriage, but I feel uncomfortable with the idea nonetheless. Unfortunately I got really cross with him when he got cross with me, and told him I would lift it, but if I lost the baby I would consider it his fault. At which point he refused to let me help, but was even more cross!

Now, I know it was mean and childish of me to say that but I just couldn't think of another way to get across strongly I felt about it.

I have grumped my way to bed now too, as I've been ailing with a nasty cough and cold for the last three weeks, and I had actually said I was knackered and was going to bed before he started asking me to move stuff (to be fair to him it did need moving tonight). I feel rather down in the dumps and wonder if any of you have any wise words? (And I know, I know, I shouldn't have said that to him... Ugh.)

I only put on 2 stone with dd. I think that was down to having acid reflux so not being able to eat much. However, this time I feel hungry and sick. I'm going to try and be good. I want to eat well for the baby.

Your dh is probably terrified, Bluebell. With our first, DH refused to acknowledge my bfp until I did a cbd and it spelled it out for him. Even then, he didn't really want to talk about it. He never took into account just how much strain my body took whilst pregnant. We went on holiday and he has me walking up hills and laughed at me for getting out of breath when I was 4 months pregnant. He didn't really understand the physical and emotional changes. However, this time he has been totally different. He even wanted to tell people before the scan. He is being much more attentive and helpful and I'm only 4 weeks today. I would bet that your dh is panicking. His coping method is to bury his head and pretend it isn't happening. In your shoes, id go down stairs and say sorry for your comment. Tell him that you are scared and that you just want to do everything right for the baby. Then get a good night's sleep and try and talk to him again in the morning. Good luck x

Oh Loki, thank you so much. It's a time of big change I suppose, and emotions are running high! It is so helpful, too, to hear that your DH is being more understanding second time round - now that he knows a bit more about what it entails!

I will go and have a peace making attempt now. Thank you. Xx

It's really abstract for partners, as they just aren't experiencing it moment to moment like we are. For many, I think it becomes more real when they can feel and see the baby's movements, and also when they can see the scan. I remember at my 12 week scan, my little DS was bouncing like a rabbit, really moving. My DP just couldn't believe it, and I think it started to sink in from there. He was really chuffed the first time he felt a kick too.

Totally agree, Culture. My DH was very cautious and it drove me potty. I wanted to talk names and he wanted to wait. I bonded with dd as soon as the line came up on the test. The same with this one. For dh it came much later. Now that he has been through it he is much more relaxed. Hope it goes well for you, Bluebell x

I have bonded with my baby instantly too, even though it's just the size of a pip I could not love this little soul more xx but the men take a little longer to "warm up" to the idea it would seem - My DP is a very supportive man, but when I told him I actually said I get you might need some time to process this... Go into your cave ;) He just wanted to be near me but hardly uttered a word on our way for a pub lunch, and then suddenly had to go and get some air... They panic in a different way to us, for him he was worried he might fail me, that he was nervous on how to support me through this, was worried I might go utterly bonkers with hormones and how would he deal with this (fair play I had to stop taking the contraceptive pill when I had to change due to age as it made me suicidal and somewhat evil) explained it's different hormones... And that he was a silly sod just being here is enough for me. Obviously using "man" appropriate language but that was the jist of it lol

He is on day five of knowing and is actually showing signs of real excitement! The nerves are slowly disappearing he is helping me keep rational and when I told him of my digital changing from 1-2 to 2-3 I could see he was happy :) Every time he acknowledges what is happening or just checks up on me (have felt so sick at times today and have been so bloated) to make sure I'm ok, my heart flutters and I fall madly in love with him all over again, I think he's nervous he knows how much this means to me and I think he is in some way trying to stay detracted so that if God forbid something awful happens that he can be strong for me but I'm not thinking about that as it's been a wonderful day with my mum and him and I honestly can't remember feeling this happy!

I've actually agreed to let him come to my MW appointment he wants to be a part of it plus I'm struggling to remember my own family history so I'm bound to forget his.

Oh gosh I am feeling super emotional this evening some of these posts have made me Cry happy tears such lovely little stories

I can relate to what a few of you are saying about first timer dads-to-be needing time to process - my husband has been citing worst case scenario examples for the last few days and warning me not to get my hopes up but he's settling down to the idea of 'it's really happening' with each day that passes with no bleeding and more pregnancy symptoms. Going to test again when we get home from honeymoon to provide extra evidence for him, I'm convinced and like you Ellie, already bonding with my baby - have been if I'm honest since I started suspecting before even doing the test. Have just been crying my eyes out over 'the notebook' on in flight entertainment which would be an emotional film normally but extra so with the raging hormones!

Oh, you guys are great. Lucky, I can relate to the worst case scenario thing - I think my DH, like yours, is trying to protect me from getting too excited in case it all comes crashing down - what he doesn't seem to understand is that I am worrying enough for both of us!

Loki, I can imagine it will be a looooooooong time before I can talk names with him, too!!

Culture, I had a feeling that the scan might be a turning point - sounds like you had a magic moment there. :)

Ellie, I'm sorry you had such a bad time on the pill but glad your DP is being such a sweetie pie!

6+0

I second that, you guys are all great and don't know what I would do without you!

It is such a wonderful but scary time!

Just on the pill - For me with the pill took marvelon for years not an issue, changed due to being 37 (new doctor was horrified I hadn't change two years before) took it for three months and went nuts, seriously nuts - stopped for a bit, tried again and changed completely (I couldn't see this) I hated myself, I hated the world worst of all I was loving one minute then horrid pure horrid to my DP - he was so supportive he realised what was happening quite quickly and stuck by me through that - it was awful, truly awful, I am a confident woman with a high powered job and I couldn't function, decided what to have for dinner was suddenly the hardest thing - so I know it will be a whole lot of time before anyone goes back to the pill but if you change your usual one just keep an eye out it could have destroyed my relationship and I could have ended up seriously hurt or dead. It's rare but it happens and I'm very lucky.

It helped when I told my husband that he couldn't protect me from the worst case scenario. If it happened, I was going to be utterly devastated and lose my shit for a while. As soon as you get the positive test it is real. Life changes instantly and even if the worst happens the baby was still here and part of me. I told him I needed him to get that and to be positive and if something happened I needed him to be there for me and protect me from the stupid bullshit that people come out with when they think they are being helpful. It worked

I'm not sure if I should be joining this thread yet as hasn't been long enough to test yet, but pretty certain I am about 3 weeks in so sometime in mid July id say. Anyway, hello ladies! Or should that be Although I've just completely gone off tea!

Can someone post the most recent version of that list again?

So- with a few days to process I am actually feeling a little bit better! Still not told my mum yet though. Need to register with the DR but am terrified of blood tests- not sure how this is going to work!!! Went to the gym today ( as normal) and am now completely exhausted! Have any of you told anyone yet?

Hi Pregs, yup I told my mum, wanted advise really plus she's been banging on about grand children long enough (also with me this weekend celebrating my birthday and would have guessed within about five minutes) she was delighted and is with me today bra shopping - and holy moly my boobs have gone up TWO BLOODY SIZES!! I'm 5+1 these things have a mind of their own! I'm now an E cup... Thought they had increased slightly as DP has been talking to my chest more than usual lmao

Maternity bra best invention ever however my boobs are feeling miles and miles better!! £30 for two in M&S if anyone is thinking about it strongly suggest to just do it!

Loki - think I'm going to have that convo with DP tomorrow night when it's just him & me snuggled up on the sofa - with him giving me a foot rub - these are mandatory right?

Hi All. Welcome Nikitasol!

It took my partner about 36 hours to acknowledge the enormity of finding out we were pregnant with DC1. And then he told me via text! Men I think just have a different way of getting their heads around what is at once a momentous yet totally natural, age-old process. Now we're 5+1 with DC2, I still had to remind him how different it is, emotionally and physically, for us women particularly since we 'live' it every second.

So I'd say what I appreciated most was the small things: like remembering how knackered you get in the first trimester and giving you a back rub in bed at 9pm...and indulging you in the occasional daydream about baby names/baby kit/birth plans etc.

He didn't come with me to MD appointment but did comes for the scans. When he saw the bean at 12 weeks backflipping, it suddenly became real for him because he could see it and tell people and show off the printout etc.

Ellie - love the bra story, exactly the same for me! I'm actually still wearing maternity bras from DC1 as I've only just stopped breast feeding him - M&S ones are fab.

Another fun thing to do is to take a nursery appointment at John Lewis - you book in advance but they a) give you free coffee/cake and b) offer really good impartial advice on prams/car seats/muslins etc. It's great to do with you Mum or a girlfriend..

As for food (sorry about my endless post, finally got some time on the computer!), I was diagnosed with gestational diabetes last time at 30 weeks so am trying to be as healthy as possible. Lots of high fibre and sadly less sugar (or if you're looking at it positively, more maple syrup!)...though I am of the school of the odd glass of wine didn't/won't do any harm either!

beckslovestimmy - 31 - DC2 - 26 June
Woodsy81 - DC1 - Due 30th of June
Youandmearegoingtofall out - DC1 - 28 - Scotland - Due 1st of July
orchid15 - 26 - Newport - DC1 - Due 1st of July
Popscene21 - ? - ? - DC2 - Due 1st of July
Wellthen - DC1 - Due 1-3 July
LaytexSales - DC3 - Due 2nd of July
Bluebell20 - 30 - Somerset - DC1 - Due 2nd of July
soniashoe - 40 - DC2 (DD is 3.5) - sussex - due 2 july
CultureSucksDownWords - nearer 40 than 30 - DC2 - Due 3rd July
Cookiesandcoffee - 27 - wiltshire - DC3 - Due 4th of July
Hamsolo - Due 4th of July
photographerlady - 33 - Southampton - DC2 - Due 5th of July
Indians-Cheshire-dc2-between 5and 6 weeks
Elmumof4 - ? - ? - DC5 - Due 6th of July
Foobio - 28 - London(ish) - DC1 - 7th Jul
BeauticianNotMagician81-34-Market Harborough-Dc4-7th July
Lollipop86 - 28 - Southampton - DC1 - Due 7th July
Ellizardo - 39 - London - DC2 - Due 8th July
Vikkijayne2507 - 29 - DC2 - Due 11th of July

Think this is the latest one?

I'm terrified to add my name to the list. I don't know why!

Definitely going bra shopping tomorrow too, that's my main symptom so far (along with tmi constipation, dried apricots with every meal atm!) and drinking lots of orange juice which I'm not usually fussed by but that could be due to the horrible cold I've got .

Also going to try and find some belly hiding work clothes too, to hide it for as long as possible. Any suggestions for where is good at the moment? Doubt I'll quite be ready for maternity clothes yet!

5+5

Hi Foobio Gap maternity (online only), H&M, Asos are all good

Hi Fobio I was just thinking the same - going to start by just layering up with baggy tops and scarfs so hopefully will be ok for a few more weeks before a bigger shopping trip is needed.

Anyone really struggling to concentrate when at work? With so much flying around my head I'm really struggling to focus..

Join us on the list Loki!! xx