It's sneeze birth's galore thanks to our fanny stretchers! We're soaking in piss and praying for Bat's hospital bag. We're avoiding our mens 'Annie Sloaners' and eating all the cake! It's JS Gras 39!

[jellypi3]

Welcome, welcome, welcome to the 39th grads thread... celebrating the success of Just Shagging in getting us viroids upduffed!

For those that don't know, a 'viroid' is from the original JSing thread 1, where someone was trying to type ladies (in reference to all the JSing ladies), but their phone decided to call us all viroids instead!

The name stuck and we've been the JSing viroids ever since.

The 37th grads fred is HERE

The thread we have graduated from is HERE in its 53rd outing. WARNING: they're all a bit kerazy not to mention randy!

There is also a Just Mumming thread HERE for once your babies come along, or to keep up with the graduated graduates!

There is also a private facebook group (so it doesn't give the game away in your news feed!)... if you want to join to see photos of new babies etc, just ask in-thread!

HERE is the stats list, please update your own spot with any updates.

bat you won't care... I pooed in the pool while pushing, and we just laughed it off.

i am concerned about pooing myself, but i guess they see it all the time so must be used to it!

The idea of being naked apart from a flappy top and socks, grunting and talking about bodily functions with my DM and DH in the room is just horrific.

Bat I don't know where you're up to, but I remember a corker of an episode early on with a chinese wife and german husband. It was SO funny. She was such a complete and utter grump and he was so placid and sweet.

Yeah everyone poos during birth. Fact!
My house is mildly untidy. I repeat. Mildly untidy.....aaaaarrrrrggggghhhhhh

haha ga you would seriously have a fit at my house, it's not been hoovered since thursday last week im such a slob

I didn't poo, but I did a massive fart on the midwives hand. She told me off for not pushing properly. So I did. And farted like an old man

i've massively over indulged today, i was starving at lunch so I had a large katsu curry for lunch (it was hench) and just finished it off with a banoffee pie pot thing, i actually feel so full i think my bump will burst.

Ha love these birth stories! Just saw an episode where the woman was like (to her partner) oh can you just have a look what's coming out of my vagina? Is it blood or mucus? And bless him he had a look, totally unperturbed.

ga you crazy lady get your bloody feet up and just embrace the slight mess!

That is v brave Bat! I have watched some nice hypnobirths/pool births on YouTube to counteract the effects of OBEM! The lady who had a pool birth in the most recent series was amazing though.

Apparently walking is bad for your pelvis Jelly, bit of a design flaw there. Stairs are too. I still do about 3 miles a day at work but the midwife said to take it easy. She did say that is feels odd giving that advice as a HCP but that I should 'preserve ze pelvis!' (She isn't Garmon btw, I ad libbed) Swimming is fine though so long as I don't do breast stroke (snigger), so I can still beast myself in the pool.

Oh sorry, missed out a whole page there!

Ga you make me laugh. Hoovering is bad for 'ze pelvis' too. I made that up but don't tell DH as he is doing all the hoovering at the mo ha ha ha. Definitely doesn't get done that often though...

Arrgh, DS knocked over a glass and it smashed into pieces. My back is killing me today but I had to crawl around picking up/sweeping bloody glass. And then get the hoover out which I swear weighs a ton.

10 minutes later he spills milk all over the floor... I think he just needs to have a poo accident to completely make my day.

See Carrot, hoovering IS bad for you!

I couldn't agree more pud!

I'm so shattered I want to cry... Totally not counting time till DS's bedtime 1h 18mins

The consultant gave me the thumbs up for an ELCS. In fact he booked it in while I was there!

I'm so happy I could cry!

Woah seems I have a lot more to catch up on than I was expecting!

Stomach beards are ace I love stroking mine weirdo

That jelly sounds like an amazing lunch and now makes me want katsu curry! I'm eating loads but little and often I find I get more in that way found myself awake at half 4 this morning so had a bowl of porridge and dps homemade apple jam. It was delicious!

Bat I can't help but feel you're crazy just starting to watch obem now! I watch it to see what not to do.

Yay lemon! Good to see you back

Been for my first appointment with the mental health team at the hospital. The lady was lovely seeing her again in 3 weeks and she's referring me to a doctor to discuss medication and also to a 12 week compassion with something or other course to teach me to be nicer to myself. It feels good knowing I will get some support

Aww that sounds nice jc I hope it helps you!

I'm regretting so much food. I feel so uncomfortable. Baby must be squished. She's kicking me quite a lot so maybe she's telling me to stop eating.

Yay for ELCS thurs!! Have you got a date?

I need to shave my lady garden before I go to Spain. It's got a bit unruly. I normally use that hair removal cream but you can't use it in pregnancy. What's the next best thing?

jelly next best thing is getting your man to trim it for you - highly sexy as I'm sure you can imagine! Dignity gone I can hardly reach down there now so couldn't use hair remover cream if I wanted to. Reminds me that I need a tidy up tonight before cervix check at the doc tomorrow!

Ooh thursday you're booked in?? When's your baby coming?

Jelly I use hair clippers and give myself a number one these days as the old food has completely disappeared from view. When Dsis comes round I get her to wax the wisps away that threaten to spread down my legs / up to my navel. That's as good as it gets.

Thurs can I ask why they're giving an elcs? Is it because you had one before if so what was the reason then? Tell me to bog off if I'm prying. It's just that my consultant is being a birk and refusing an elcs even though an orthopaedic consultant has said I should have one so I'm having a bit of a battle

Think I'm gonna have to cracking out the clippers. I can still see my lady garden it's just a but wild is all...

Put your foot down Country, they are not allowed to refuse an ELCS. If they don't want to do it they are supposed to refer you to someone who will.

JC, that really is good news that you are receiving support. I think mental health services may be starting to improve slightly, I have seen a few people get good support recently.

Think I'm at the point now where I font really get hungry because baby is taking up too much room. This is very disappointing.

I have always used hair removal cream in pregnancy to no ill effect. Though only when I could still see down there.

country I don't mind you asking at all - happy to share my experience.

The reason on the forms is previous EMCS and maternal request.
I found out today that DS was head down transverse, ie fully engaged, head down but facing the side, so his shoulders were stopping me from pushing him out. Also I'd been in labour, induced, for 24 hours by the time I got to the pushing stage, with an epidural that kept wearing off and I was knackered. He was also 9lbs which didn't bloody help!

Anyways. EMCS, massive PPH, epidural headache, symptomatic anaemia. Took 10days in hospital to recover, a blood transfusion and a blood patch.

So all in all it was fairly horrific, only saving grace was that DS was totally fine, stayed healthy and fed like a trouper.

Luckily this consultant saw all that the same way I did.
I hope you have better luck.

Apologies for the horror story all. I was v unlucky, this is unlikely to happen to anyone else.

Why can't you use hair removal cream? I have and it didn't say not to if pregnant

Sorry that was v me me me.

JC I'm v pleased your mental health sounds as if it's in good hands.

I'll read back in a bit

Thanks for sharing thurs