April 2015 - thread 17. The babies are still coming thick and fast, waving Pom poms a plenty in support!

[PenguinPoser]

Felt we might need a new thread to get through the night feeds and labours!

Lauren at you making lunch! You shouldn't be lifting a finger, unless it's lifting a cup of tea or some cake in the direction of your face. I think that playstation needs to be hidden, pronto!

Hugs Daholster I don't have any experience of managing another child but it sounds really tough. Considering the emotions I'm going through just with one I can only imagine how you feel but thinking of you.

Re jaundice - dd had from day 3 and didn't look back to normal until she was 3 weeks old! We had to do some formula top ups for a day too while establishing bf as she was sleepy and wouldn't latch on. Didn't need hospital thankfully.

Park trip was successful thanks to the sling!! Although as dd went 4 hours without feeding she's making up for it since. Also had her to doctors as her mouth thrush is back and my nipples are burning so we are back on treatment. I don't think it had properly cleared up and GP said she might need s couple of weeks treatment. Hopefully it won't affect her feeding. I'll cope with the pain!

He was watching the tv at the time and was complaining that we couldn't have lunch till the Tesco van came as we had no bread. I just opened the freezer and found some mini pizzas and chucked them in the oven. Hardly cooking lunch but it was food but annoyed me that bread was the only thing stopping him getting is food. He could have nipped to the shop and bought us a sandwich or cheeky mcds.

Think I've done too much today my back hurts. But I have come to the conclusion that her cord might drop off sooner rather than later as it isn't weeping or anything and looks pretty shrivelled up. Will keep my eye out for anything nasty looking though.

I wanted to feel I'd done something productive each day Lauren82000 but dh stopped me doing a lot. I think second and subsequent births are easier to recover from but it's still tough and you need to let yourself recover. Two weeks on I pretty much feel back to normal but after walking round the zoo all day yesterday with ds3 in the sling my back ached. My abs are doing a lot more than they were in those first few days so my back is managing a lot better. I did cook dinner on the second evening home just because I wanted to do something normal and feel I was looking after my family as I'd been away from them for several days. Take care

If you continue to feel you're not getting the answers you want from the gp daholster, may be worth speaking to your hv as they will probably have more experience of nipple thrush anyway.

Yay for your sling and park trip and glad you're getting treated PenguinPoser!

Daholster hope you're ok .
You sound like you're doing so well, your DD won't remember this as she gets older although I know that you feel bad for her now.
I don't have another child of my own, only OH's daughter as you know. She has only been here since about 6.30 and I am already wondering how people cope with a newborn and entertain an older child too. Hats off to everyone that does!

Thanks for jaundice comments. Hope it clears up soon.

Lauren my little one has a slight infection on his umbilical cord according to the midwife today. So picked up a prescription for some antibiotic cream to use 4 times a day. I cried to the midwife as I felt like it was my fault.
Don't worry, you can always call the doctors and see if you can have a phone consultation x

daholster, I was saying to mum the other day I felt guilty about DD and she laughed and said you're a mother, you'll spend your whole life feeling guilty if you allow yourself to. Just a thought

I feel like I'm constantly pushing poor DD1 away she just gets so exciting and she jumps around the baby so much that all we say is calm down or leave her alone now. I am making a point of keeping our alternate routine so I'm still doing bed/wake up every other day with her so mummy hasn't completely abandoned her.

We decided that despite the numerous offers from family to take her out for a few hours we thought it would be best to say no for now, we don't want her feeling shoved out so we can spend time with the new baby.

Very true smogsville!!! I always look at it as giving a child a sibling is the best gift you can give them. A few weeks/months of not as much attention is more than made up for with a friend for life. Ds1 was pretty independent by the time ds2 came along so didn't want to play with me all the time, plus I'd been minding for a while by then so he was used to sharing me a lot of the time. I'm sure if you think about it daholster there were plenty of times dd was playing on her own and talking to dh and he wasn't listening before ds arrived. Be kind to yourself

Hope things improve for you daholster. So impressed with all of you doing everything- I feel so lazy but scared of leaving DS on his own too long and DH is looking after us brilliantly. Next week will be fun, but i'm sure it'll be worse for him not having us around

Also daholster, I'm the eldest, when my sis was born I asked when we were taking her back to hospital after two weeks. We're great friends now and I love her dearly. She's a splendid auntie to DD. She used to monopolise my mum v effectively by feeding non stop, I'm sure I felt enormously resentful at the time, my dad was working long hours and commuting so mum must have been spread pretty thinly and yet here I am at the end of it a relatively normal, well-adjusted person with a fab relationship with the interloping sibling!

If any of this sounds vaguely boastful it's really not meant to btw

There's 2years 3 months between me and my brother and my mum couldn't leave us alone as I always hurt him, hit, bit, pinched etc and apparently deliberately dropped him on more than one occasion! But when he was bullied at school I kicked butt to get it sorted, I will always love him despite him coming along and ruining my life

RL I hope you can rest. Tomorrow is another day and your son is feeding which helps flush out jaundice.
I was so deranged after the birth that I didn't twig DD had jaundice. We got kept in because they thought I had an infection. I had noticed she was a bit tanned. OH is dark featured so in my post partum daze I thought oh that's nice she's a bit tanned. It's so devastating if the tiniest thing is amiss with your baby, esp adding hormones to the mix too. I cried and cried about the jaundice even though it's so common.

argh. best winding tips? I've been winding DD for nearly two hours and she's wriggling and screaming and won't settle.

Thank you all. It is very very hard to see her on her own looking towards one or other of us for a response. It breaks my heart a little bit, I would give her everything if I could. I know that in the long run she will not remember and she will hopefully have a playmate that she will love. In fact she is already asking for another one Yes she used to play on her own but she could always get our attention. If dh didn't hear her I would always go instead now I can't if I have a baby stuck to my boob or whatever. I've been trying hard to share my time but, like smogs pointed out it is very easy to feel guilty as a mum when I just want her to be happy. Interestingly my mum, a long time ago, told me that one of her mistakes was trying to make sure I was never unhappy even for small things. She says it means I didn't learn coping strategies as early. And disappointment, so I found it much harder when I went to school and she couldn't control everything for me eg friends and relstionships etc. Still, here I am, just fine I think... But it is another thought. Still doesn't stop me crying at my little lone dd!!!

Thank you for all your support. Re the thrush too!

London probably a bit late but straight up on the shoulder, if no luck then sitting on my knee one hand under baby's chin with feel of palm on baby's stomach, other on back and steadying the head, squeezing baby a little and milking hands upwards, rocking baby back and forth. If no luck there lie on drawn up knees and pivot baby go and down. After that if they don't work I just get really frustrated and give her/him to someone else!!!

Dh redeemed himself somewhat, asking why I was sad and saying he wanted to talk about it when I initially declined, and did ring his parents and ask if we could still go round. We asked dd if she still wanted to go, yes, so we went for an hour He couldn't say much about me feeling bad for dd.

But that was better. Ds is squeaking. He had a really good feed and snooze, hoping he's not waking already as I want to go to sleep!

Glad things have improved daholster. Your DD sounds like she wants for nothing and has a very loving and caring mummy who should remember at all times she can only do her best!

We're still sorting the winding thing too although most noises seem to come out when DS is being rugby balled... hope i'm not squeezing too tight to hold him. The hv today suggested holding them so their legs were dangling then moving them gently, usually the change in position gets a burp....It worked once anyway!

thanks daholster.not too late. I got 20 mins of peace with her in bouncing chair and now feeding again so winding saga set to continue. sadly no one else to whom I can offload. dh sleeps elsewhere. so I need to just figure it out somehow.

We fell out in the way up to bed as I asked dh to be a bit quieter! I'd put ds3 in his cot as he was sound asleep at 9.30, we came up half an hour later and he dropped the keys locking the front door which you can't help then generally thundered around like a baby elephant! Cleared his throat right outside his room, dropped the lid of washing basket, shut a drawer loudly etc. He then said I'm think I'm the only one who can be quiet when actually I'm able to wake the whole street! I then laughed at how much toilet roll was hanging from the roll half way across the floor and he just said oh yes and you're the only one who can use toilet roll as well . At that point I ignored him and he fell asleep! Usually I'm then wake being annoyed but far too tired for that at the moment! Bloody alcohol makes him argumentative and I get so annoyed with it! Couldnt he say sorry didn't rralise I was being noisy, I'll try a bit harder to be quiet next time?

Have you tried feeding again londonlivvy? Sometimes that can shift it through. Very frustrating in the night though!

Had half an hour sleep so far, and nothing but broken sleep since this time last week.
Baby doesn't want to sleep in the Moses basket, only in our arms and at the minute he's in OH's arm on our bed and they're both asleep. Obviously transferring him to Moses basket soon again but just know he will wake up. What can I do?!?!! Have just had a cry to OH - feel so stressed

Still awake...nappy changed.... Fresh milk..... Back on OH's chest

Hello everyone,had a bit of a catch up through this thread but just thought I'd check in while I had the chance.
I had no concept of time with regards to my labour and just read my posts from the start of the thread.waters broke later than I thought, 20 to 6 I think I posted. When mw arrived i was already 7cm apparently so dh was running round tryig to fill the pool downstairs lol.Baby was born in the pool at 8:06am and the mw said it was a really fast labour especially for a first baby And I was only pushing for about half an hour.
apparently I asked he midwife to let the sure start centre know I didn't need my sweep appointment and she laughed and said not to worry about it. Haha
I'll get round to putting birth story on other thread when I find it again.
I would say, even though I ended up having to be transferred to hospital for stitches in theatre (baby had had over his head so was more difficult and a bit stuck) the birth was lovely and he's totally worth it

Hey rl I'm with you! (I think we're birthday buddies too). Don't take this the wrong way but it feels reassuring to know im not the only one that's struggling at this time of night and with putting them down after feed.

I sent dh to bed to sleep and baby is currently asleep on my chest. I decided not to bother trying to put him in carrycot after feed coz I seem to wake him every time.
he's struggled with latching the last couple of times too and I'm just trying to stay calm,
I'm rubbish at winding him too when he needs it.
Bum muscles have gone numb,Now I want the loo but don't know what to do about baby. Dam these laxatives

Hiding he was born early hours on 21st, is that when you're little one was born? We finally decided on a name today due to having to do a last minute registering at the doctors as we needed some antibiotic cream for his umbilical cord. They wouldn't register him as baby surname so we sort of had to finalise the name! He is now Max.
He's asleep on OH's chest again but he's asleep too so obviously I'm awake. He feels bad for me for getting no sleep and says he's trying to help me out by taking him and settling him but it's hard to explain to him that he can't sleep on our bed, I think I'll just have to show him the SIDS leaflet tomorrow so he can understand better. I've asked if he can take him in the morning unless he's asleep in his Moses basket, so I can stay in bed and actually get some sleep.
So we've established that it's not the feeding or anything as to why he won't settle, it's the actual being in the Moses basket. I've tried wrapping him up, not wrapping him up, long sleeve suit, short sleeve suit, scratch mitts on, scratch mitts off, stroking his hair, rocking his Moses basket gently, ignoring him for a few seconds (very hard to do so won't be doing that again), dummy but it gives him hiccups, feeding which he nearly always takes, lamp on, lamp off, the latest one is keeping my phone background light on so it doesn't lock, so it acts as a night light.... etc etc the list goes on .
I feel awful when he's whinging and I can feel myself getting worked up and I just want to scream. It makes me feel terrible because of course I love him so much, it's not him I'm angry at obviously, it's just all the emotions.
Hope you're ok and can get some sleep.
Going to try him again in the Moses basket now, I am absolutely shattered.

Hello! waves

RL hope he settles so you can get some sleep. It must be so hard! You sound like you're coping really well though.

daholster don't feel too bad for DD although it's completely natural. We can't always get what we've been told as long as you explain reasons why there shouldn't be any reason why she'll not trust what you say. This is the joy of being an older sibling and also valuable life lessons. Life isn't always fair and things don't always end up as planned. My friend had to cancel a holiday on the day her DC and her were due to go and yes there was much wailing and gnashing of teeth but life sucks sometimes. The children recovered and they all went a different time instead.

London as obvs don't have a baby can't help on winding advice but hope it all disappears soon. It's uncomfortable enough as an adult!

cinnamon What a noisy bugger! Still if DS slept through all that then you're hopefully onto a winner. Party at yours then!

Had a proper windy miller day today! Think have single handedly destroyed the ozone layer above Birmingham. Bump has done lots of moving in pelvis and feels like he's trying to burrow out. DH also said bump looks a lot lower. Lay awake with lower back ache and full on achy pelvis feels like ovaries are about to drop out but no coming and going pains. Hoping this is the start of his grand entrance to the world!

39+4

Brummagem I had no coming and going pains! I was 39+5 and had had lower back ache for 3 days and if I remember rightly I even wrote on here that it was so mild I thought it was my mind playing tricks on me. That night my waters broke! And didn't start getting contractions until the following day.
I'd also had an Indian take-a-way that night a few hours before, but I'm sure that had nothing to do with it! .

Literally need matchsticks for my eyes now