Due November 06 - the home waddle

[mygirllolipop]

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LOL Charlee I have been watching a snail make its way up my living room window all morning, left trails behind it obviously, once it has gotten off the window I will clean it off, it is bugging the hell out of me, but there is no way I am going to touch the snail to get it off - urgh!!! LOL

Taxi is here, see you all later xxx

Hello all, been up North for a few days and my has this thread been busy while I have away !!!!

Luckily no labour this side whilst up North, was not looking forward to that prospect.

NJ - Think I had the same kind of show as you at the weekend, no blood just snotty and a fair bit, was clearer than yours though. Got a little concerned as I was away from home but had nothing since Saturday night, thought this could have been this mucas plug the midwives keep going on about ???!!!!

Charlee - Anymore news from your side or have things eased off?

Went to consultant yesterday he is happy with me and has discharged me, just got to see anethetist (SP)? next week or week after about Epidural because of my medical history and weight, just so they can calculate what they need to give me before I go in, just in case I need one! So it just the usual weekly trip to see the midwife now.

With ds i had several bloody snotty shows sorry far far tmi! They came on and off for about 3 weeks then i was induced anyway so who knows?

Still pretty much the same here contractions come and go they get a hell of a lot worse at night time and if i do anything to strenuous. The mw is aware of them and isnt worried, just says as soon as they get to an unbareable stage to call the labour ward and go in to have my meds sorted. So im taking it each day as it comes really.

Finding things with ds so difficult, i feel like the worlds worst mother i just can't seem to sympathise with him, i know he's scared what with me being in hospital and he can sense the baby. I know that but his constant clinging is making me go insane! I cant even go to the toilet without him on my knee! He's in bed as we speak screaming becuase he doesnt want a nap, i do try to hug him and reassure him but on one hand i think god i wish someone would take him for a while but on the other hand i hate it when he's gone and can't stand him not being here. Sorry i feel so confused i love him so much but he's frustrating the hell out of me! Sorry you probably all think im a complete bitch now right?

I do love my son i really do just having a mental moment, it seems since i was in hospital i can't seem to cope with him needing me 24/7, which i know is not his fault. I keep biting his head off and i feel so so crap about it.

That was a long post just to reply to a simple 'how are you' question sorry!

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OK I am back, all normal checks that they do are fine - BP fine, wee clear, bump measuring 35 weeks so is fine. She said I could go up to the hospital to be checked today if I wanted but she said it wouldn't tell them an awful lot as the contractions I get in the day are just BH, so she has said if I get another 'episode' of contractions like last night (every 3-4 minutes) then to go straight to the hospital, but she has booked me to see the consultant tomorrow at 11, I'm not entirely sure what he is going to do, but he must be able to do something, else there wouldn't be any point sending me to him.

I suppose I knew it would kick start it, but I have now gone from just getting on with the pregnancy, with out worrying about appointments and everything else to having to see him tomorrow, the midwife in 2 weeks, if I make it that long, and it will be every week from then on. So that is it, I have lost control over it all. I feel like shit

NJ dont be so hard on yourself you have gone through the majority of this pregnancy with seeing anyone you have done really well, you only have 5 weeks to go, the professionals would have had to step in a some point, don't be cross, you did this for all the right reasons. Now then, take a large bar of galaxy and sit in the living room with your feet up !

should have said without seeing anyone !

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Hey NJ: Wish they'd told me when I started this that once pregnant, your body becomes public property. No wonder you've been resisting it all, but you know, you've done well to come this far without too much interaction with the 'institutions'!

Use them while it's helpful and convenient, but listen to your heart too and don't agree to anything that doesn't suit you or your instincts. It doesn't hurt too much to go along with being 'checked up' most of the time!

• (Although they did try to make me see a psychiatrist in the early stages because I was so miserable with the way I was being treated! - Of course I told them to b*gger off and that increased interaction with them would make me worse not better - but that's another story!)

can i have galaxy too please???

well from my contractions being 3 hours apart all day yesterday they took a kick start at 7 and went every half hour, i had a bath at 9 and they slowed to every 45 minutes, went to bed at half 11 (must be a horrible person who can sleep through contractions, did it a lot when in early labour with dd didnt wanna labour over night so went to sleep to slow things down) now have woken up this morning and they are down to about every hour, will lewt you know any progress but i didd this with dds labour and it went on for 2 weeks so i doubt il be the first! lol

oh and docs went well yesterday, lo is still head down which is great, but he has changed sides (laying on left not right now) doc said i prob felt so strange as dd was head down and engaged from 20 weeks so didnt feel real movement with her, just kicks at this stage!

oh and have worked out the difference between my BH and contractions, i dotn get the BH in my back, contractions i do, useful when timing as i gettin bh about every 10 mins! lol

oh and dh was supposedto be having fri and mon off for dds birthday (on sun, my little girl will be 2 ) and was told today that he has 2 days holiday left to take before the end of the year and the only time they can be taken is tomo and thurs, so he off all the rest of this week too! which is cool! esp. if this one decides to hurry things along and gets moving coz he wont need to take more time off for baby which would save us money.

think i worried dh last night about things anyway as came back form MILs (never a pleasant experience) and cried my eyes out asking if we could just get this baby out now coz im so tired and uncomfortable and fed up of it all! which is horrible coz im only 36 weeks but i just want this baby out now! been drinking my Raspberry leaf tea (not very tasty but i dont care if it helps) was even debating jumping on dh last night to jump start things (obv i didnt, doubt its physically possible) just really hope these contractions come to something or i think i might have a breakdown. is there such a thing as ante natal depression?

sorry for long post, doesnt help when contraction happens in the middle and i manage to think of even more to say!!!

Stacey,

There is such a thing as antenatal depression. I was told I had it in the early stages and referred to a psychiatrist, which I refused as I wasn't depressed, just very very cross with them misreading my notes and telling me I had an infection that I didn't have, getting my address wrong so I missed appointments, giving me tests without telling me what they were for or why.

At one pont I struggled to an appointment with severe Morning Sickness to be told that it had been cancelled (they never informed me). I broke down in tears and thats when they tried to refer me to a psychiatrist with antenatal depression! It all got really nasty with my doctor phoning me and asking me if I was sure I wanted to keep the baby, - so I can understand COMPLETELY why NJ is resisting seeing these people!

Sorry for the rant, - don't know where it came from...it was a long time ago now, - but I guess I must still be angry!

I suppose I'm getting anxious again knowing I'm gonna have to interact with these people again.........

i can understand your frustration with them, they dont seem to understand how hard it is to acctually get to these appointments to have them f*ck them up!

just wondering about the depression thing but think it could be hormones, as im fine most the time then will have 3 days where all i wanna do is lay in bed, not do anything and hate having dd and dh around.

think im a little worried as when i was younger i had depression and used to self harm, it only stopped when pg with dd coz i was so scared of someone taking my baby off me, think im worried all that will come back, oh i dont know.....just feel horrible thinking about it all and knowing the feelings i feel right now are very similar (lack of energy, no drive to do anything, snappyness and a general feeling of inadequasy, i know i know i really cant spell!)

I know I'm not really pissed off about having to see people, I am letting the tiredness take over more than anything! I am scared incase more does happen tonight and it doesn't stop. I am feeling guilty and horrible for wanting the labour to go ahead on one hand, and damn right miserable at the thought of another 6-8 weeks of this on the other. I hate putting DH and DS, and my bloody sister (who I do love to bits!) through it. DH is now on about getting his mum to come and stay the night in case things do kick off tonight, which really is the last bloody thing I need, having her telling me how wonderful everything went for her, and how she was a perfect little housewife (never mind the fact that she walked out on her DH and 5 kids when the youngest - my DH - was only 5 years old, oh and that she was planning to marry a convicted kiddy fidler 6 months ago, 'because she is soooo lonely' blah blah blah!) but DS loves her, and if he is going to wake up to me and DH not being here, she is the only other one he would handle being here, but of course if we get through the night with out having to go, it will be all my fault in the morning that her poor cats had to be fed my her new boyfriend instead of her, and all for nothing.

Sorry, I hate being a nasty cowbag about people, but I can't help it at the moment!

oh NJ i completely understand, no way would i want MIL here if i went in to labour, she keeps offering to have dd when im in labour but i dont want her to, i want her to go to my mum, who i know will feed her proper food and wont care how long she stays (in case i need a c section or similar) whereas MIL would throw a fit if we were gone more than one night 'because i have my own children to look after dont you realise', yes i do bloody realise thats why i didnt want you to have her!!!!!!!!!!!

arrrrrggghhh...........think we'r all a bit too hormonal now, at least we have each other to vent it on!

NJ: Is there anyway your ds can go to HERS for the night - just to give you a break?

Stacey: I'm afraid I don't know a lot about depression, so can only advise chocolate! It's supposed to increase your seretonin levels I think - similar to prozac!?

I think it also helps with hormonal issues, - so come on you lot, - get out that chocolate!!!

Sod it I am am going to carry on moaning about her, she will go on all night about her sodding cats, if we do have to go to the hospital and we're not here in the morning, I know for a fact that to get DS up, fed, washed, and dressed will be far beyond her capabilities, she might manage to get him a chocolate bar out of the fridge for his breakfast and stick him in possibly something along the lines of a pair of shorts (it is October FFS!) and a pyjama top, which she will moan to high heaven about because I don't iron What an awful wife/mother I am who can't even be bothered to iron clothes....

I am feeling much better now!! Nothing like a rant about my MIL to get me in a good mood!! LOL

DH has just rang, she isn't coming, 'how would the cats last with out me for a night?' she said to him, FFS, she knows the situation we are in with this, she knows we have no one to look after DS when ever the time does come for labour, and has said she would come up if we have any sort of notice whatsoever - this is the f*ing notice.

DH is really angry with her, he has said a few things I think he will regret when all of this has calmed down, which means she has 'won' because she is now the victim, and of course I am sure it will be my fault in here eyes, when it comes to getting it sorted.... GRRRRRRRRR, SHITTY F*ING FARTY CRAPPY HORRIBLE BLOODY WEEK!!!!!

So so so sorry - really I am!

Stacey a bar of galaxy is on its way !

Bethbe, she won't have him, or any of the other grandkids, stay over at hers, the one time she has baby sat for us here (I mean the one and only time in 4 and a half years) we had to PAY HER!!!! £20, it was worth it to go out for an evening, but that just sums her up really, selfish bitch of a mother... LOL I am going to cringe like hell when I look back over this thread!! LOL

It makes my DH angry because we bought her a car, which cost over £2000 a couple of years ago, she promised to pay us £60 a month to pay the debt off, it soon changed to 'whatever she could possible give us' and then went down to nothing, we got less than £200 from her over about 8 months, when she decided to sell it to her friend for £600 - which she kept, and we are still paying for the damn thing, DH feels like she 'owes' (possibly too strong a word, more like he thinks she should feel she could do us a favour every now and then) him a bit for that one.

Stacey - yes there is such a thing as ante-natal depression and I had it!!! I've been taking omega 3 tablets daily since I twigged what was happening and I've been fine since.

NJ - do what you need to do, have who you want around you and go to the appointments that you feel are necessary. Did the midwife say why you needed to see the consultant tomorrow? Why not make the most of the opportunity and ask all and every question that you can and then only go to the midwife appointments after that that you want to go to?

Weekly appointments aren't usual for everyone I'm not getting them - my next appointment is in 2 weeks and with the GP cause the midwife doesn't have any more appointments - he didn't have a clue last time and don't expect he will this time.

Right off travelling up the country and will catch up in a couple of days. Hope you're appointment tomorrow is ok NJ

H x

Oh NJ what a crap time your having, is there literally no-one else you can trust/rely on to look after your DD? Cos you know what will be next .... MIL will be doing this either under duress or will be doing YOU the biggest favour known to man. I would be inclined if possible to find an alternative sitter just to save face ! Sorry I'm feeling evil too LOL !

MAMB, I've no idea what the consultant is going to do. With DS I saw a consultant 3 times throughout the pregnancy (no idea to this day why I had to see him as well as the midwives) every time I went he hurt like hell trying to feel the baby, don't know why he found it so hard, the midwife never hurt me! And he was always very confused about my dates, which is why I ended up being induced at only 40+5. So I'm not overly confident that tomorrow is going to shed anymore light, but like I said, he must be able to do something, else they would send me to him.

MAMB, I've no idea what the consultant is going to do. With DS I saw a consultant 3 times throughout the pregnancy (no idea to this day why I had to see him as well as the midwives) every time I went he hurt like hell trying to feel the baby, don't know why he found it so hard, the midwife never hurt me! And he was always very confused about my dates, which is why I ended up being induced at only 40+5. So I'm not overly confident that tomorrow is going to shed anymore light, but like I said, he must be able to do something, else they would send me to him.

MAMB, I've no idea what the consultant is going to do. With DS I saw a consultant 3 times throughout the pregnancy (no idea to this day why I had to see him as well as the midwives) every time I went he hurt like hell trying to feel the baby, don't know why he found it so hard, the midwife never hurt me! And he was always very confused about my dates, which is why I ended up being induced at only 40+5. So I'm not overly confident that tomorrow is going to shed anymore light, but like I said, he must be able to do something, else they would send me to him.