March Mummies 2015 - second tri continues with ever growing bumps, boobs and babies

[lotsoftoast]

New thread - have lost count which number it is!

I have printed do not admit and do not send to post natal ward on my notes in sharpie marker and bought some truly ugly pants and sainsburies own night pads......I think I'm probably ready!
I'm going to try and cut last times 6 hr turn around by leaving it almost too late and insisting on going home immediately! I let them get the afterbirth before clamouring to go home this time.....

i cant believe we are at hospital bag stage already not long to go now. still quite a few things to get for him tho yet but have added most of it to amazon basket and will just check it all out at once soon. still havent brought his carseat yet either. aiming to have it all ticked off my list by the end of the month tho. then might turn my attention to some decorating

I got the primark pants too! 2.50 for 5 pairs that come just about up to my armpits lol. Still can't believe I sent nipple pads to my old landlords house!!

I do need to order new pram wheels at some point, I may even splash out on a new mattress, and then bring on the pink stuff!

Gudgy, they sound like the same pants! At least we won't get 'cold kidneys'.

Hi girls, I haven't been on here for ages or even reading the thread; have been reading the posts in the FB group though. My mum is really ill (cancer), so I've had a hideous few weeks trying to look after her, fighting to get her admitted to hospital, and looking after her again now she's home. Things don't look good TBH and I'm dreading what's to come but trying to keep positive. They're starting her on a new chemo soon so hopefully that will do some good.

What with that and Christmas, I've barely thought about being pregnant, which makes me sad as I really wanted to make the most of it this last time (DC3 and definitely last!) I'm 29 weeks tomorrow and feeling very disorganised reading about your hospital bag packing and baby clothes shopping! Haven't even decided whether I'm going for a home birth or the midwife-led unit. Seeing the MW on Tues so will hopefully have a chat with her about that.

We have at least finished painting the baby's room and I've bought curtains, a lampshade and rug from Next - their jungle brights range - as we don't know whether we're having a boy or a girl. Planning to get new carpet next weekend and then it'll be pretty much done.

Then I'll be able to get the baby stuff down from the loft and see what we've got. Should be lots of neutral stuff as we didn't find out the sex for DS or DD.

Think I'll start making some lists of what I'll need for hospital bag. My tip is dark coloured PJs and trackie bottoms as they don't show any, errr, leakage! I used maternity pads for a couple of days and then switched to always nighttime ones. Also lansinoh cream and breast pads.

Sorry for the essay, I'll try and keep up with the thread now!

So sorry to read about everything that's happening with your mum lifeis, hope your managing to stay strong through it all! Big hugs to you xxx

So sorry to hear about your mum lifeis
Really hope you get some positive news after the new chemo. Can't imagine the amount of emotions ypu must be trying to deal with. Will be thinking of you.

Well dh is off he will pop back for the odd weekend between now and the end of march but he won't be home for good untill 2 weeks after the baby. Feeling a bit panicked and very tearful. Must hold my shit together for the sake of dd who is very sad and no doubt going to play up horrifically for me for the next few weeks. Wish my hips weren't in so much pain so I could take her out and do loads of stuff with her get some mum daughter time before her brother comes along. Going to have to watch a lot of frozen!

Morning all.

Sorry to hear your having a tough time Life.

Reading all of your hospital bag stuff makes me think that maybe I should be packing too. 7 weeks still seems ages away, and the MLU where I am planning on going is only across the road from our house so I haven't really thought about planning that bit!

We had the most exhausting Christmas break unpacking and decorating. Looks like we are knocking a wall down in the next couple of weeks too. I'd love to get the nursery ready but doesn't look like it will happen before bump introduces itself to the word. Still a friend is giving us a Moses basket and stand so bump has somewhere to sleep when home. I'm hoping to find a shop with a Silver Cross Surf 2 in it this week to try out (apparently it is small enough to fit in the boot of my mini) the we can get that on order. Not sure what else we need, a few sleep suits, the travel system and a Moses basket I am hoping will keep us going for a few weeks!

I'm hopefully finishing my hospital bag and the baby's this week! I was up from 1-3 this morning with agonising tummy pain, was really scared for a while that it was early labour, but no I just needed the toilet haha.

Decided to paint one wall in the baby's room pink, so hoping to get that done next week (my dad's a painter by trade so will be done properly and quickly, amazes me how quick he can paint a full house never mind one wall of a room!!)

Cot is being delivered today, just waiting on my cousins buying moses basket, sister buying bouncy chair, and brother buying changing unit and think we're good to go!

Hurry up March!!!

Can I ask your advice on something guys? I dont know how to approach this with OH. I have a feeling that after the section, I'm really going to want my mum. I think I'll be in shock from surgery, emotional wreck due to just giving birth etc. I'm thinking of telling him I want her to be there while its not happening. Not in actual theatre, but nearby in the hospital so I can see her right after. Its nothing to do with her getting to meet the baby first or anything, just I'm a woman giving birth and I want my mum there for me. But I think if I mention it, he will also want his mum there. Even if he doesnt, if MIL knows my mum will be there, she will kick up a fuss. (She's very competitive and annoying that way, she wants to be one of the first to meet the baby, and she'll think thats why my mums there). But I dont want her there. We've been together 4 years but shes still a relative stranger to me. Not someone I want to see when I'm in that state.

How do I go about bringing this up with him?

sorry to hear about you mum life hope you get some better news after the new chemo

awww fish must be tough saying goodbye to dh for so long

eeeek butter not long now. i still have 12 weeks left. well about 11 as will be having c section early. still im sure its going to fly by as have lots of appointments due to being high risk and now growth scans and extra consultant appointmenta piled on top and decorating still to do. plus still lots to buy for baby elijah and dc's are back at school from tomorrow too

life and fish finger I really feel for you both. I hope that you both have plenty of real life support.
gudgy no advice as such bit just wanted to say I completely understand that you'd want your mum there and not mil. I've been with dh eons and his mum is lovely but I still wouldn't want her rocking up at the hospital. Your own mum is an entirely different proposition. His mum should understand that, but it sounds like she may not. Does she really need to know your mum is there? Not sure if that would work.
I am feeling tired and stressed today. Dd and I are both a little bit coldy, so we're tired. She also wet the bed again last night, and whilst I know it's just one of those things I am sick of a full sheet and duvet change during the night. She's now in a single bed and the new duvet won't fit in the washing machine as easily as the cot bed one did.
It's just little things, generally all is well so I feel silly for moaning!

Gudgy I'd try to explain it to OH as you have to us. You think you may want your Mum because sometimes we girls just need our Mum's and that his Mum is just not quite the same thing and not someone you want to see when you are a mess. Hopefully he will understand and support your decision to include your Mum while shielding his Mum from the information.

I totally understand, you can be far more relaxed with your own Mum than anyone else's. I really get on well with MIL but when I am an emotional wreck and need help it is my own Mum I turn to as I still feel I have to put on a smiley face for MIL, cant shout at her then apologise and be forgiven and don't really want to cry on her shoulder as it just doesn't feel as comfortable as Mum's.

theone we bumped into a friend of DH's a couple of days ago who cheerfully told us how one of his was three weeks early and the other two weeks. Gave my DH a scare. Bump could be with us in 4 weeks! Think we need to get on with getting ready and getting our childbirth classes done

I dont even know if she will be able to make it, she started a new job today as ASN support teacher so she doesnt even know if she will get the granny leave! Worth saying to him though and asking her, surely he will understand. Thanks ladies!

I'm sure he will. My DH has been great with stuff like that. When I was sick at the beginning but we didn't want to tell anyone yet he told me in no uncertain terms that I needed my Mum and we could tell her and Dad and wait to tell everyone else till after we had our scan.

Luckily MIL did understand, she has a very close relationship with her daughter and could see that if it were SIL then she would as Mum be the first called upon for help.

I understand wanting your mum there I would want my mum with me, she was by my side/hanging around the hospital whe whole time I was in last time. My dh totaly understood as did Mil. I did make sure Mil came the day after dd was born though so she wasn't left out. Luckily her and my mum hit it off as they both were staying at my flat.
This time round mum is coming as I come out of hospital as I think I will need her more once home dealing with c section sacred, baby, toddler and young dog. My mum's a teacher and can't get granny leave so she hasn't told them I'm pregnant and is just going to take a week off sick. Think she feels bad about it but also knows I need her with me, wish she didn't live other end of country Mil will be looking after dd.
My issue is with my friend I've asked my closest friend to be birth partner but I have another friend who's going on about taking a week off work to be with me at the hospital... Bit awkward as I don't really want her there.
Talk to you dp and maybe even your Mil, say that you need your mum to hold your hand in hospital but can't wait to introduce Mil to baby when you get home/the next day at visiting hours, what ever you want.
Can you give her a job so she feels wanted and useful? Driving home from hospital?

Its a good idea fish, but at the same time, we have always been very independent from our families and dont ask them for anything. I'd be afraid if I asked her to do something like that, it would open the doors for her to try and involve herself everyway. We're trying to put a type of 'its our baby, not yours' wall up so people dont get too pushy or involved. Plus we have 2 cars of our own lol. Obv she can visit, but thats l'll want her to be at the hospital, a visitor. Unfortunately, our hospital has open visiting all day except meal times so it wont be just a case of 1 hour and see ya!

gudgy stand you ground about the birth your mil will get over it. as for visiting when youve had enough just say im very tired now so im going to get som sleep we will see you tomorrow...... big smile...... pause..... bye

Thats actually the only thing I'm not looking forward to. Everyone being there all the time! I'm very anti-social and dont like people in general, so having to deal with all these people poking and prodding and holding my new baby is going to drive me insane!

my sil drove me crackers she was always here and never left dd alone and then with ds she had calmed down and it was overbearing neighbours turn to do my head in and i think she might be like it again this time. i hope not but already thinking of a nice way to tell her to bog off home and leave MY baby alone

theone, my plan is to turn off my phone and ignore the door when it gets bad! oh will be told the same, or told in no uncertain terms I am not accepting visitors that day and if he moans, I'll be going out with the baby and he can deal with visitors himself.

Oh and was looking at bedding for the cot last night and he told me MIL has already bought it. WTF?! What the actual f..... Without consulting us etc. I've told him to tell her I dont want the neutral winnie the pooh bedding just because his aunt has got us a winne bath and toiletry box, I want pink things in the baby's room so get her told.

I'm gonna need to put my foot down very hard sometime soon I think.

I was wondering how possible it is to go into hiding!

Why is always MIL not Mum who is the problem.

Mum is gagging to buy stuff. So we are going to have a day out shopping together in the next couple of weeks and she can spend and we can choose together.

MIL has been fine really. But I do get edgy when she says that x friend has offered us some stuff (we are very pleased with any hand me downs other than travel system as we need one small enough to fit in a mini convertible boot.....yep, good luck us) and she will sort through what she wants first then let us have second dibs on what is left!

I don't mind the visitors, provided they make their own tea and bring me one while they are at it! Plus I have been known to leave them to coo and have a bath especially in the first few days... I'm sure to get her to myself as I'm feeding her. However I don't want people buying clothes and stuff until after I have been shopping and she is here.....sadley I think there are lots of mothercare bags stashed around West Sussex full of fuchsia pink stuff which will probably be worn once!

the neighbour im talking about is jealous of oh's niece she seemed put out when i informed her that family would be visiting us before anyone else she actually mentioned oh's niece when she said i suppose that girl will get a cuddle of him before me. said like a petulant child. wanted to scream well duhhhhh of course she will your just a neighbour she is family